Her mother's cry came: "I know, you go!"
I said again: "Auntie, please tell Xiaofei, don't forget what she promised me."
There was no sound behind the door, so I could only leave silently.
In the midst of this storm, the final exam came, and my grades were appalling, and I came in third from the bottom of the class.
Teacher Wu was extremely disappointed. She didn't know whether it was because she was really worried about the degeneration of a good student, or because she was worried about her admission rate and bonus.
My mother talked to me, criticized me very severely, and decided to limit the time I could go out to play. I suddenly changed my silence in front of them and said to her, "Since you can throw me to your grandfather when you were young, then don't care about me now. Don't blame anyone for what it is like! Just take good care of your precious little daughter, I will be responsible for my life and death! I don't need you to worry about it!"
Mom was so angry that her hands were shaking, but she didn't dare to hit me. She knew very well that as long as she touched me, with my stubbornness and extremeness, and the contradictions between them, it was very likely that she would push me into a relationship with them. Deviated road.
It may take a thousand days to learn well, but only a few days to learn badly.
One day after the Spring Festival, I was riding my bike home, and I saw Xiaofei at the intersection, wearing an old-fashioned black woolen coat, smiling at me.
I couldn't believe what I saw with my eyes, so I rushed in front of her: "Xiaofei?"
She smiled: "You still know me!"
I was so dumb that I couldn't speak, all I knew was to hold her hand and smirk. "Let's find a place to talk for a while," she said.
I said yes, and immediately rode her to the riverside, because in winter, no water was released, and the entire riverbed was exposed, so we sat on the riverbed and chatted.
She asked me, "How did you get on your final exam?"
"not too good."
She sighed: "Qiqi, you have to study hard, don't waste the brain God gave you, not everyone has the opportunity to study hard."
I keep silent.
She looked up at the poplar forest that had lost its leaves, with a sad expression on her face: "Sometimes, when I wake up suddenly at night, I cry and long for nothing to happen. It's all a nightmare, as long as I wake up, I can still sit in the classroom and listen to the teacher's lectures. Now, when I think about the annoying homework and the teacher, I will find it very precious. If I can do my homework and listen to the teacher's lectures again, I would rather give everything in exchange, but no matter how much I regret it I know how much I was wrong, no one is willing to give me a chance, no one is willing to give me a chance..." Xiaofei's tears rolled down her cheeks one by one.
I also had tears all over my face, but I didn't dare to cry out, so I could only keep wiping it with my sleeve.
Xiaofei watched the sky silently for a long time, and suddenly smiled and said, "Qiqi, you have to trust me, I will remember what I promised you, and be a strong person."
I nodded.
She asked, "Do you have any money on you? I want to ask you to borrow some money."
I hurriedly searched my pockets, because for the New Year, I happened to have some lucky money on me, a total of more than 230 yuan.
She took it, carefully put it in her pocket, and we sat side by side for a long time, she said, "It's too cold, let's go!"
I pushed the bike and asked, "Is there enough money?"
Xiao Fei smiled: "How can anyone dislike a lot of money?"
I hurriedly said, "If you still need it, I can help you with some more."
"Do you want to ask Brother Li to borrow them? I don't want their money. No matter how rich they are or how they pretend to be, they are not good people. Qiqi, you should avoid dealing with them."
If someone else said this, maybe I would have had sex with him long ago, but to Xiaofei, I just said softly, "I'm not a good person either."
When I passed a small shop, I had an idea and said to her, "Wait for me for a while."
I pushed the bicycle into the small shop, and said to the proprietress, "I want to sell this bicycle, you can give me a price." I know that these small shops accept stolen goods, ranging from TV sets to as small as a cigarette. One of my father's leading sons often steals the cigarettes that other people gave his father to exchange for pocket money.
The lady boss looked at me: "Sixty."
"One hundred, this bike is almost brand new, and I didn't steal it. You can rest assured to use it for your daughter."
The proprietress looked at me a few more times, and seemed to be judging whether what I said was true or false, and finally decided to make a deal.
I took 100 yuan, walked out of the small shop, and handed it to Xiaofei. Xiaofei saw that I left the bicycle in the small shop, and she already understood where my money came from. She didn't refuse, she took it and put it in her bag. , said to me: "I'm leaving."
"When are you coming to see me again?"
She smiled: "Next time I come and invite you to eat mutton skewers."
I nod.
She took a few steps, turned to look at me, and said, "Qiqi, I will remember what I promised you, and you have to take care of yourself, remember, and study hard." After speaking, she walked firmly steps away.
Her figure drifted farther and farther in the cold wind. I stared at her back. Although my heart was heavy, I gradually had hope.
Because she makes me feel as if all the dark clouds will dissipate one day, we will still be sitting in front of the charcoal stove, eating kebabs, drinking brick tea; we can still sit on the sofa, chatting about dyeing our nails, discussing hairstyles in magazines .
However, I didn't expect that this would be the last time Xiaofei and I met.
A few days later, the news came that Xiao Fei had run away without a word.
Her parents hated her for embarrassing them, maybe wishing they never gave birth to her, but when Xiaofei disappeared as they wished, they went crazy looking for her again, but there was no news of her, some people said they saw her buying When she bought a train ticket to Guangzhou, some people said they saw her buying a train ticket to Beijing.
Because I sold my bike, when my parents asked me, I was too tired to make up lies and told them the truth. Unexpectedly, they were not angry. Instead, Dad asked his old classmate who worked on the railway to help him find Xiaofei.
My heart began to feel a little bit of guilt, because during this period of time, I had been talking coldly to them, and they all looked haggard.
Xiaofei's parents went to Beijing and then to Guangzhou, but they never found her again. Xiaofei's mother's spirit was completely broken and she was almost half-mad; Xiaofei's father became an alcoholic and no longer had the strength to beat others.
After confirming that Xiao Fei really left, I couldn't sleep every night. I regretted for a while that I should not have given her money; then I regretted again, why didn't I give her more money. Once I fell asleep, I would have nightmares, dreaming that Xiaofei met bad people, dreaming that she had nothing to eat, dreaming that she had no clothes to wear.
I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, my body and my mind were breaking down.
Facing my rapidly losing body, my father and mother could neither beat nor scold me. They could only tell my sister to play with me more, and urged me to go to the painting class, hoping that other things would distract me from Xiaofei.
The third-year high school students still took classes during the winter vacation. Xiaobo gave up his homework and tried his best to accompany me and teach me various reasons. Tell me that Xiaofei would leave even without me, and I was not the one who made her leave. Let me analyze it. Xiaofei's departure is not necessarily a bad thing. She leaves here and goes to a place where no one knows her. Maybe everything can start anew, and she should be happy. He also took the popular TV series "The Alien Girl" a few years ago as an example. Although Xiaofei only has a junior high school education, she is very smart and will not be worse than Chen Xiaoyi in "The Alien Girl". Since Chen Xiaoyi can get ahead, Xiaofei also You can definitely find a job and take care of yourself.
One day, he gave up class again and came to me.
I sat on the stone bench and watched him pass through the cold sunlight and the mottled tree shadows, and suddenly realized that he was also very thin.
Suddenly, my tears couldn't stop falling. He didn't persuade me and sat silently beside me.
After crying for a long time, I said to him, "Don't skip classes, you must go to a good university, and I can only go to a university with you in the future."
He said, "Okay."
On the surface, I no longer mention Xiaofei, but I often think in my heart, why did everything become like this? When we were in the summer vacation, didn't we agree that we should study hard together, and everything would be bright? Xiaofei's pregnancy and abortion, only Xiaofei knows, Xiaofei's parents know, I know, who will spread it out
Although those boys violated Xiaofei, they didn't know that Xiaofei was pregnant and had an abortion. Even if they couldn't keep the secret because of showing off, and told others, at most, it was secretly spread among the classmates that Ge Xiaofei was not a virgin, but such rumors, The school has never been short of it, and the "non-virgin" girls are still alive and well.
I asked Xiaobo, Xiaobo said he didn't know.
A few years later, Zhang Juncai told me the reason, the rumor originated from the hospital. The doctors and nurses who had abortions for Xiaofei did not abide by their medical ethics. They took the abortion of a little girl as an anecdote and told their friends and relatives, and the friends and relatives told their friends and relatives. Chuanbai has become the best talking point on the mahjong table, and more and more people know it.
And the four boys, after they had a relationship with Xiao Fei, told their friends ostentatiously that there was word of mouth among the boys, and many people knew that the "Fei'er" in No. 1 Middle School was no longer a virgin. At least, Zhang Jun was in the second grade At the end of the semester, I had heard that "Mayfair" was broken.
When rumors of Xiaofei's pregnancy and abortion spread, people who had heard of the two rumors compared the two rumors to each other, and merged them to produce a version of the rumor that Ge Xiaofei was gang-raped by four people and got pregnant and had an abortion, which directly led to the later police intervention.
In this case, Xiao Fei and the four boys did make big mistakes, but the group of doctors and nurses made the biggest mistake. Without them, even if it was a mistake, it was a correctable mistake. However, they did not Giving this group of teenagers a chance to turn back has directly led to the tragedy of several families.
Back then, China's laws were not perfect, otherwise they should be brought to justice if they leaked the patient's privacy. I just curse their consciences to play a little role when they remember the tragedy of five families, five teenagers destroyed, and make them have nightmares every night!
2
Guan He's Secret
A beautiful woman is liked, a strong woman is respected,
When a woman is beautiful and strong, she is invincible.
Throughout the winter vacation, my life was chaotic. The only normal thing I did was to pay New Year's greetings to Teacher Gao during the Spring Festival.
Teacher Gao already knew that Zhang Jun was in a bad class, and she also knew that my final exam grades dropped sharply. She was very sad. She told me that although she has brought many students, she still thinks that Zhang Jun and I are the most special among the students she has taught. As a teacher, what I am most afraid of seeing are students who are obviously talented, but waste myself .
Zhang Jun is assigned to a different shift, she is not worried. She said that Zhang Jun's concentration is stronger than that of many adults. On the surface, it seems that everything doesn't matter, and he can follow the trend. In fact, he has his own ideas in his heart and will not be disturbed by others. .
But she was very worried about me. On the surface, I was stubborn and indifferent, and it seemed that it was difficult to be influenced by others. In reality, I was very sensitive and easily disturbed by the outside world. The ups and downs of my grades were enough to prove her judgment. She said that she did not expect my high school entrance examination results to be very good, but at least she should ensure that she can be admitted to a key high school.
When he came out of Teacher Gao's house, Zhang Jun was parking his motorcycle downstairs. He bent down and lowered his head. He didn't see me. I quickened my pace and wanted to pass by him as soon as possible.
"Hey!"
I didn't stop, just paused, not sure if he was calling me.
"Hey!"
Again, I looked back uncertainly.
"Ge Xiaofei is very smart and strong, she will get through it." He stood by the motorcycle and looked at me.
Only then did I make sure that he was talking to me, only to feel that all the sadness poured into my eyes, and tears rolled in my eyes.
He seemed to want to say a lot, but in the end he just said, "Don't be too sad."
I was afraid that tears would fall when I opened my mouth, so I just nodded, turned around and left.
I felt like there was a pair of eyes staring at me all the time, so I went one step faster and wanted to run away.
A new semester begins, this is the last semester of our junior high school.
Although Xiao Fei's affairs were upsetting, but with her disappearance, everything quickly calmed down. Especially between classes, when the sun shines through the fresh green leaves, the boys running on the playground are ruddy and full of vigor, and the girls are eating ice cream and laughing and chatting gossip. I don't need to listen, I know what they're talking about. Because, two years ago, I was one of them. Different people, but always similar youth, always similar stories.
Sometimes it's hard for me to believe that a person is gone like this, but the world is still running so vigorously, can't it feel our sadness
The earth will not stop because of anyone. This is the most honest and cruel thing to say.
Zhang Jun has a new girlfriend named Chen Yinan. She is a talented girl from our school. She used to be the director of the school radio station and the editor-in-chief of the school newspaper.
We also dealt with each other. I participated in several speech contests, and after winning several awards, she once invited me to join the school radio station, but I politely declined.
She is now a student of the liberal arts class in the senior year of high school. She has exceptionally good Chinese grades. It is rumored that she is a girl who looks a bit like Sister Lin.
Chen Yinan and Zhang Jun's former two girlfriends have nothing in common, the only thing in common may be that they are both older than him. Everyone fell in love with her and Zhang Jun. I don't know what point Zhang Jun caught the eye of a talented girl. Could it be that he and Chen Yinan discussed Li Bai, Du Fu, Li Qingzhao and Zhu Shuzhen together
Maybe because of Xiaofei, maybe because of numbness, I didn't feel the slightest heartache, I just thought lightly, Zhang Jun seems to be unable to bear loneliness at all, the girls around him always come and go, how long can this one last
I dug out Agatha? Christie began to study, in the puzzle arranged by the old lady, looking for clues and nailing the murderer. Because Xiaobo is preparing hard for the college entrance examination, he is rarely in the karaoke hall, so I don't go to the karaoke hall very much. Every day after school, I either go home or go to the library.
Life was very peaceful, but in Guan He's eyes, my peace was self-defeating. She tried very hard to approach me, but because of Xiao Fei, I had locked the door of friendship in my heart, and I refused to accept her kindness.
But she didn't know which muscle was wrong, and she actually got into trouble with me. No matter how cold I was, she didn't feel it. Urge me to do my homework, urge me to attend classes, urge me to study hard, and take the initiative to play with me. Whenever a classmate reunion, no matter how big or small, as long as she attends, she will definitely pull me in. She reminded me of nuns in Christianity, trying to save me from the devil.
I was reluctantly led by her into her circle of friends. In this circle, there were the monitor Li Shan, the poet Song Chen, and Wei Wei, who was pale and weak. Because he was the third, we called him the third. There is Wang Hao, an English class representative who lives in his sister's house to study.
Guan He worked hard to enrich my life, and I worked hard to be indifferent.
Song Chen was not used to seeing me for a long time, and was very unhappy with me being unsmiling all day long, and asked me, "Why don't you laugh? You look like a representative of women who are bitter and hated in the old society, do you know that 'Smile, ten years old'? '?"
I told him: "Do you know why 'smile, ten years younger'? Because laughing too much, it is easy to grow wrinkles, and it is easy to grow old. When people ask your real age, you will be surprised, wow, you are so young."
Song Chen was speechless. Although he was talented, he could not be able to catch up with me even on eight horses.
Although he disliked me, Guan He covered me and he could only give me three points.
Guan He wouldn't be so enthusiastic enough to force me to turn against her, but she would never give up on me, anyway, she just worked hard. I have a stone gate to protect me, and I don't plan to open it for a thousand years, but Guan He plans to make water drops until the water drops through the stone.
One day, I had forgotten what the reason was. Anyway, Guan He needed to go home to get something, so he insisted on dragging me and asked me to accompany her home. After arriving at her house, I saw her erhu, I asked her to play a song for me, and she played "Night on the Prairie" for me.
"I remember this song you played when you first transferred to our class."
She was surprised: "You actually remember? This is my favorite piece."
I remember everything about her. What did Gu Long say? The person who knows you best is not a friend, but an enemy. Unfortunately, Guan He is a good student and does not look at Gu Long. Otherwise, she should really be wary of me.
I asked her, "Who did you learn your erhu from?" Erhu teachers are not easy to find, at least I have never seen an erhu class.
"My dad taught me this. He likes this song the most. It's very good."
"Oh!" I nodded lightly and looked at the family portrait hanging in her living room. Her father was old and fat, with a lot of fat on his face, so he couldn't tell that he was a genius.
She sat in silence for a while, then suddenly pulled out an album from the depths of the drawer and opened it to me: "This is my dad's photo."
I glanced at it, was stunned for a moment, and couldn't help but take a closer look. The man in the photo is clear-eyed and refined. Because it is a black and white photo, his bookishness is more and more revealed.
This person must have changed too much, right? How can it grow from this to the one in the living room
As I scrolled back through the album, I found that they were all young photos, not even a middle-aged one, and the family photos only had my father, mother, and Guan He, and there was no Guan He's brothers and sisters. I was secretly wondering, Guan He said: " My current father is my stepfather."
"Did your father get sick and die?"
Guan He shook his head and said lightly: "One year he went on a business trip abroad. On a very narrow road, two large cars met head-on and needed to pass. He accidentally stuck his head out of the car window, and the driver of the two cars I didn't see it, my head was rubbed off."
I'm horrified, it's the most horrific way to die I've ever heard of. If I hadn't heard about it myself, I would have wanted to make up a more conventional death, whether it was liver or lung cancer.
I've only heard it once, and I haven't dared to stick my head out of the car window for many years. I even put my hand out of the car window to look back and forth. I can't imagine how much psychological shadow Guan He has.
Guan He doesn't seem to have poured out his thoughts for many years. Once he opens it, he can't stop: "My father's surname is Xia, because he likes lotus flowers, so he named me Xia He. Gao Jie. After his death, my mother married my current father because she didn't have a job, in order to support me and give me a good educational environment, and my surname was changed from Xia to Guan."
"How is your current father treating you?"