A Book Dedicated to Our Youth

Chapter 66: Extra 1 Fleeting Years (1)

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Zhang Jun was dumped by his girlfriend recently.

This girlfriend is very beautiful, but has a not so good problem, like to ask his love history. She investigated his love history thoroughly. There are six ex-girlfriends in total, and each of them has been carefully cross-examined, except for one. The reason is very simple, because the other five have offered to break up with Zhang Jun, and only this one , is the breakup proposed by Zhang Jun. According to the logic of your girlfriend, since it is the person you dumped on your own initiative, it is natural that you have no feelings, but the other five are different, who knows if your love is not over, and whether it is possible to rekindle it? It's a long time ago, especially the predecessor and the second one are very suspicious.

So the following dialogue is often staged

"Which of your girlfriends is the prettiest?"

"Which girlfriend do you like best?"

Zhang Jun doesn't like to answer these questions, but when a woman is instigated, God will cry.

"The most beautiful girlfriend...I think...like sitting across from me."

"Favorite? There is no favorite, only the only one I like is you."

He coaxed her like a child. Girlfriends haven't experienced unforgettable feelings, and they don't know that the most reluctant page in life must be hidden the deepest.

He has been very good to her, and life has been peaceful.

However, one day, the girlfriend heard from somewhere that the girl he dumped was from Tsinghua University, and immediately became interested, and repeatedly asked what the girl looked like.

He wanted to perfunctory as soon as possible, but his girlfriend suddenly became anxious for some unknown reason. He insisted that he say something bad about that girl, say the shortcomings of that girl that he hated, or break up with him.

He lowered his head to think for a long time, tiredness welled up in his heart, raised his head and said to his girlfriend, "For me, her only flaw is that she doesn't love me."

The girlfriend stared at him for a while, and said calmly, "Let's break up!"

He said, "Okay!"

They broke up, but Zhang Jun still paid and worked hard to help his girlfriend solve the job.

He also helped to find a house and move. After everything was arranged properly, he retired.

The girlfriend was very emotional, "No wonder your ex-girlfriends praised you so much, but they refused to be your girlfriend."

Zhang Jun said with a smile, "I'm not lucky."

The girlfriend saw that there was some dust on the wall of his clothes, and wanted to reach out to help him brush it off, but Zhang Jun immediately took a step back, but the girlfriend was nothing, laughed at himself, and withdrew his hand: "Why did she do not like you?"

Zhang Jun was playing with the car keys, making them jingle, with a smile on his face, "Who? Who doesn't like me? I thought everyone liked me!"

The girlfriend didn't speak any more, sent him downstairs and waved goodbye to him.

Zhang Jun got into the car, hummed Jacky Cheung's song unconsciously, turned the steering wheel with one hand, and opened the CD in the car with the other hand. When he heard Jolin Tsai's song, he was too lazy to change the disc, so he turned it off and turned on the radio.

The host broadcasted the traffic conditions. While driving, he tuned the channel. There were male voices and female voices in the audio. Happiness and sadness flowed through in an instant, just like this life full of holes.

When he finally tuned into a channel with a song, and it happened to be the prelude, he stopped.

The mezzo-soprano is very warm and pleasant, and the music is soothing and pleasant. She talks slowly in the small space of the carriage, and the first lyric catches Zhang Jun's attention.

I want to ask if you still remember my name

When the tide rises and ebbs several times

Those crazy and romantic days of those years

ah

you come here at once

i miss forever

What's wrong with this irrational

happy for a while

Why do I insist that it must be

my most memorable

Joy and sorrow over mountains and seas

not alone

Fortunately, I had your warm heart

Still shining the light you left

you shine

I'm dizzy forever

I'm so embarrassed

But I was

I really thought the way you hugged me

is a hint of promise

After people come and go, hope and disappointment

i'm still alone

Fortunately, the eyes that used to cry for you

Still shining the light of love

All these years, these things all at once

how have you been

please promise one thing

If I could see you again

please let me see

your brilliant look

In the singing, the smile on Zhang Jun's face slowly faded, and his eyes focused on the front, with a vague sadness in his eyes.

When he was young, he had loved a girl wholeheartedly, but that girl didn't love him, or it couldn't be said that he didn't love him at all, it should be said that he didn't love him very much.

At that time, both of them were young, and there would be disputes from time to time, and Qi Qi would ignore him for the little things. He loved her very humblely, and kept her with compromises again and again, hoping that one day she would be moved and see the heart that he held in front of her with both hands when he lowered his head.

However, no!

The front of her is too gorgeous, she can't care to lower her head, she just wants to fly forward.

That time, before the final exam, they had the biggest argument, no one talked to the other, and it was a cold war. In fact, he didn't want to fight her coldly, he just naively hoped that this time she could come and say "I was wrong, let's reconcile", he naively wanted to see her elusive in this way Heart, want to see that she cares about him.

In the anxious waiting, what he waited for was all disappointment. Qiqi still lived his own life as usual, and was indifferent to his departure, but he did not live up to her expectations. She was always in his mind.

After the test results came out, his grades were in a mess, and she not only was far ahead, but also left the second place farther and farther. All the buddies around him persuaded him to break up. This girl didn't care about him at all.

However, he was reluctant, even though he knew she didn't care about him, he was still reluctant to break up.

The school invited outstanding graduates from previous years to give lectures, and Qiqi sat not far in front of him. He didn't listen to what was said on the stage, he kept looking at her.

Her eyes were bright and she stared at the Tsinghua University and Peking University students on the stage, sometimes contemplating, sometimes smiling, he was a little sad, he was not one of those excellent boys, he could attract her gaze.

Since the winter vacation of the second year of high school, when Teacher Gao asked Qiqi whether he wanted to go to Tsinghua University or Peking University, he felt the pressure rolling in and began to wonder where the way out of this relationship was.

At that time, he told himself that as long as two people love each other, he is willing to do his best to work hard, and he will definitely be able to overcome all difficulties together.

But today, he stared at Qi Qi, although she was close at hand, but felt that she was getting farther and farther away from him, and there seemed to be a gap between the two that he could not bridge no matter how hard he tried.

Heavy sadness permeated his heart, he did a very childish thing, and said to himself in his heart: If at this time, she looks at me sideways, then it proves that our fate is still there, I will wait a while. Go to her, apologize to her, tell her that wherever she's going to fly, I'll do my best to follow.

However, no!

During the nearly two-hour meeting, Qi Qi didn't look in his direction, as if he had never existed in her life.

He smiled to himself in his heart and said, look, God said you have no fate! Tell you not to overthink it! give up!

After the conference ended, she disappeared into the crowd as quickly as ever, as if she could not remember that she had a boyfriend at all.

His heart has sunk to the bottom, but pride makes him have to keep smiling.

Chatting and laughing with Huang Wei and Guan He, he walked out of the auditorium as if nothing had happened, but he was still thinking of her.

At a turn, she suddenly appeared in front of him, but standing beside her stood a high-spirited and awe-inspiring young man - Chen Jin, a former provincial champion and now a top student at Tsinghua University.

The two of them chatted and laughed in a low voice, with the same confidence and firmness between their brows and eyes.

At that moment, he suddenly thought of an appropriate word to describe them: flying together.

What Qi Qi needs should be such a boy, who can accompany her to fight the sky.

He tried hard to pretend that he didn't care, that he didn't care, but deep down he knew how hesitant he was. He didn't even have the courage to face Qi Qi, so he could only flee in a hurry.

Just when he was most hesitant, Qi Qi broke up with him.

He told himself, this is the best result, you are really not suitable, but every night, he always thinks of her, from childhood to adulthood, her figure is engraved on every page of his memories, thinking about making these memories Tear it off, as if to tear away his entire youth, the destructive pain made it difficult for him to accept losing her.

Reason tells herself over and over again that Qi Qi is not happy with him. She is always hesitating, struggling, and angry. Rather than suffering with two people, it is better to suffer alone.

But no matter how much he analyzed rationally, his feelings were always painful, and he was reluctant to let go!

After a painful struggle, he decided to give himself one last chance. He studied hard. If he entered the top ten in the grade in the mid-term exam, he still hoped to accompany Qiqi into the future life, then he would never let go, but if After all the effort, and still far behind her, let it go!

If you can't have her, at least you can give her blessings and let her fly freely.

After giving himself the last chance, he stood in front of her and humbly begged her to come back to him.

The first thing she said was to secretly condemn him for his poor final exam results and his lack of self-control to control himself.

At that moment, he was disappointed with her sanity, but at the same time he admired her sanity. This girl made him love and hate.

Qiqi came back to him, and he tried his best, for the exam, and for the future of him and Qiqi.

Every time he sees her, his heart is filled with joy and sadness at the same time. Maybe after the mid-term exam, he will let her go completely, maybe this is the last time he has her in this life.

Because every day is the last day, he tries hard to make himself happy, and also tries to make her happy, taking care of them every day carefully.

Qi Qi looked at him with a lot of sadness in her eyes. Maybe she was thinking about the future and the choice of love in her heart.

He knew that she didn't want to give up anything for love, Guan He said that Qi Qi looked down on "Anna? In Anna's love in Karenina, women must never put love first. Because of this sentence, he turned the book three times in a row.

After trying my best, I didn't even get into the top 20 in the midterm exam.

On the day when the exam results came down, he sat alone by the lotus pond in the school all night. Maybe Qiqi was all his youth. Losing her would mean losing all the happy memories of the past, but he had to give up.

At the small bridge, he wanted to break up with her, but he couldn't control himself and kissed her.

He wanted to ask Qi Qi, will you always remember me

Qiqi said, you will ask me after ten years.

How he wanted to have the opportunity to ask her ten years later, but another boy would be by her side ten years later.

He didn't have the courage to break up in person, so he could only break up in a letter.

That night, he was so miserable that he had nowhere to vent. He wanted to drink and fight, but he knew that Qi Qi would despise him like this.

He can only control it rationally.

Sneaked into the Fourth Elementary School, slipped into the empty classroom, sat in the seats they once sat in, and let themselves be soaked in grief in the dark.

That silly little Qiqi, that bad little Zhang Jun...

She used to hold up her summer hat stubbornly to shield him from the sun, not changing positions for hours.

She once saw him look at her and stammered.

She came to school in a new dress, but hid behind the crowd and walked along the wall. He said, "Your dress is beautiful." She was not happy. Instead, she seemed to have done something embarrassing, and her face flushed red. He walked away quickly without saying a word, ignoring him for several days, so frightened that he didn't dare to talk nonsense in front of her again.

After watching the police and bandit movie, he told her, let's create a secret code that only belongs to us. She pursed her lips and said nothing, probably thinking he was bored. He excitedly changed his surname to "Longbow" and her name to "Xixi", and told her that in the future when we have a secret code, you can say "Xixi calls Longgong, Xisi calls Longbow", I said "the longbow is, the longbow is". He asked her to call him "Longbow", she smiled, but pursed her lips and said nothing.

She brought a large package of beef jerky made by her mother from home, and he asked her, "Are you eating alone? Do you have my share?" She glanced at him quickly, didn't speak, took out two pieces of white paper, put the beef jerky They were carefully divided into two piles. He wanted to take them, but she grabbed his hand abruptly and forbid him to take it. Before he could react, she immediately retracted her hand and lowered her head as if to stick to the table. , the two little hands were busy, quickly took out a piece of white paper, and divided a pile of more beef jerky from the two piles, "This is for Teacher Gao, I just forgot." Her voice was so small and small. Like a mosquito humming, he posted it and asked, "What are you talking about, I didn't hear anything, I just heard a mosquito humming, humming, what is she humming?" She turned her head and looked at Look out the window and don't speak again. Throughout the class, no matter what he did or said, she didn't look at him, but when he finished eating his beef jerky, she pushed his beef jerky over, stared at the topic, and hummed: "Here it is, my tooth hurts a bit and I can't chew it."

After entering junior high school, although he was not in the same class, he would often encounter her. Every time he saw her, it was like looking in a mirror, which made him unable to help himself to look at himself.

Seeing that her academic performance has improved, she feels that she can't be too bad. After all, she is a disciple of Teacher Gao, and she was a classmate who won prizes in competitions together, so she kept her grades while mixing.

Seeing that although she went in and out of dance halls and karaoke halls, she did not indulge or follow the trend, always holding a book and doing her own business as if no one else was there.

Qi Qi has the courage to go her own way. No matter how enchanting and colorful the girls around her are, she can walk by calmly wearing the dirtiest and most ugly clothes, ignoring the opinions of the people around her. Every time she sees her like this , it will be like a bucket of cold water, draining all the messy thoughts in his head.

In the three years of junior high school, if there was no Qiqi to remind him at all times, maybe he could not keep up with his grades, maybe he would have an impulse to mix with the people around him.

After high school, when he found out that Qiqi was in the next class, he felt that God helped him.

During the military training, Qiqi sunburned her face. He went to ask Tong Yunzhu what to do, and then gave her sunscreen, but she foolishly photographed it back to Song Peng, so angry that he could only smile bitterly.

When he was sick, Qiqi would sneak out of the house to accompany him. At that time, I was so happy that I could hold her hand, talk to her all the time, and kiss her. He knew that she was timid and cautious, so he was always careful not to exceed her bottom line. He only dared to kiss her hands and cheeks, not even her mouth, but those hidden desires tortured him to sleep in the middle of the night. Comfort yourself, it doesn't matter, there is a lifetime anyway!

lifetime? Not even tomorrow!

Zhang Jun was lying on the table, tears fell silently.

He was the only one in the dark classroom, and he didn't have to pretend to be strong anymore, and he didn't have to mind that men shouldn't cry, so he let all the sadness pour into his eyes.

He stayed in the classroom until late at night before coming home.

In his mind, the past was still lingering, and Qi Qi appeared in front of him like a miracle.

He was in a trance, as if time had not passed, he was still Zhang Jun who could sit beside Qi Qi and do his homework. He wanted to get up in front of her and tease her with a smile, "I'm joking with you, let's go to the river to pick up stones!"

But Qi Qi's eyebrows and eyes are full of rational restraint, her expression is very calm, her voice is clear and logical, and she doesn't look like a male and female lover who is breaking up.

He knew that Qi Qi like this would figure it out when he slept and accept the breakup rationally.

He sent her home, thinking that this was the last time, he was heartbroken, and he could only tell himself over and over again, don't drag her if you love her.

After a short walk, he almost exhausted all his reason. As soon as he got downstairs, he immediately turned around and left, not daring to stay for a while, because he was afraid that he would regret it.

"Zhang Jun!"

He heard Qi Qi's cry, but he couldn't look back, and he didn't dare to look back!

The breakup became a watershed in his relationship.

Before that, although he had complained that Qi Qi didn't love him enough, he knew that this was something he couldn't force, and he didn't hate her.

After that, he slowly started to hate her.

After they broke up, he was still trying to restrain his thoughts of her. Every time he saw her, he would feel stuffy in his chest, but she immediately calmed down. is not affected at all.

He started to go to school together with Huang Wei. He was very aware of those rumors, but he hoped that the rumors would reach Qi Qi's ears naively. He even made use of Huang Wei despicably. She saw him and Huang Wei together, he just wanted to find a little trace of caring about him in her eyes, but, no! Qi Qi is always elated and in high spirits.

He used to think that after he worked so hard, she would be a little sad for his departure anyway, even if it wasn't for their love, there were still memories between them from childhood to adulthood, has she never cherished their relationship feelings between? Wasn't she at all sad about losing him

But she didn't!

She and Shen Yuanzhe went to and from school together, talking and laughing. Every time he saw them, he didn't seem to care, but his heart was so uncomfortable that he seemed to burst. He couldn't help but wonder, did Qi Qi really like him? Perhaps, for Luo Qiqi, apart from his own study and future, it doesn't matter who the boy walking by his side is.

Qiqi's life is business as usual, and she still takes the first place in the exam every time. She smiled and said to others: "Zhang Jun and I have broken up, but we are still friends."

She was so sensible and generous, but he was extremely disappointed. It turned out that he was much lighter in her heart than he thought.