Jiang Zesheng only later learned that He Ziming was his very speculative netizen. For this reason, he felt sincere regret for his indifference and indifference.
He typed He Ziming on the Internet: "I'm sorry." These three words.
This was the first time in his life that he regretted his indifference and numbness. He Ziming was the first person to make him feel other emotions besides fear and indifference after the kidnapping.
But it was too late.
He wanted to make up, he wanted to redeem, he wanted to say sorry to He Ziming in person, but he didn't dare anymore, he was timid, he didn't know how to face He Ziming, and he didn't know how to face He Ziming after he knew the truth. Will you forgive him who chose to sit on the sidelines with his cry for help...
Even more frightened, after He Ziming knew that he was Jiang Zesheng, he was unwilling to be a netizen with him on the Internet.
Therefore, he finally did not choose to be honest about his identity to He Ziming and walked from behind the Internet to reality.
In such an environment, the only thing Jiang Zesheng can do is to fight He Ziming’s plan against those rich second-generation school tyrants, and continue to help improve his plan, help him unblock his contacts in secret, buy out media reporters, and expand the influence of the incident. , It also made those school tyrants no longer able to touch him.
Let He Jia and all those who don't treat He Ziming as a gadget no longer dare to bully him at will.
He Ziming is an extremely outstanding, outstanding, and determined person. Even if he has been subjected to such torture and suffering, his life has never defeated him. The sword has been sharpened, and those tortures and tribulations have made him more colorful and dazzling. When he got up, Jiang Zesheng saw an extremely magnificent and splendid color.
That is the kind of tenacious, amazing vitality and perseverance that he lacks, which he didn't have. Unconsciously, it made Jiang Zesheng yearn for it.
But it was too late. It was too late for Jiang Zesheng to discover everything. After experiencing his desperation and the betrayal of his friends, he watched He Ziming get better and better, and he became more and more paranoid and sick...
He Ziming hated him. After He Ziming was rescued and resumed his normal life, Jiang Zesheng read it out when He Ziming looked at him.
He Ziming does not hate anyone who has bullied him, but he only hates himself for not being saved... Jiang Zesheng knew this clearly, but he did nothing, and only silently endured He Ziming's time and time again. Bearing He Ziming's provocation and finding fault...
Even the people playing in his circle couldn't stand it. When he wanted to teach He Ziming on his behalf, he was stopped.
This was what he owed He Ziming, Jiang Zesheng knew clearly in his heart.
He Ziming was the first person to feel fear and numbness. He Ziming taught him that the feeling is called guilt. Jiang Zesheng has been struggling with the guilt of He Ziming, wandering for a long time, cannot get rid of it, and has been condemned by his own conscience. .
He helped He Ziming many times and solved many things behind He Ziming's back, but he never told He Ziming, called He Ziming.
He owes He Ziming, so what he has done for He Ziming is justified, and should not be extravagantly grateful, he thought so in his heart.
He Ziming has always hated him, hated him more and more, and more and more distorted... He can perceive He Ziming's current psychological illness, and he is also sick...
Jiang Zesheng didn't know when their abnormal and pathological entanglement would end.
But it was the military exercise that caused the qualitative change in their relationship. As an undercover, He Ziming pretended to want to reconcile with him in order to obtain the confidential documents on his body, and to forgive him to seduce him. Defrauding the so-called'confidential documents' of an exercise was just for He Ziming at the time to play him and complete the task... But sadly, Jiang Zesheng believed that it was true. With such a beautiful vision, he was deceived...
It was at that time that Jiang Zesheng realized that he had a feeling for He Ziming that surpassed friendship and guilt.
There has been guilt and excessive attention to He Ziming for too long. Even Jiang Zesheng himself does not know when his feelings for He Ziming began, but when he found out, he was sadly in love with He Ziming, unable to extricate himself. Can't break free.
What's more sad is that he loves He Ziming, but He Ziming hates him: "I have been lying to you, Master Jiang, you are so cheating!"
"Friends? How can I be friends with the young master? Forgive me, don't even think about it, I just hate you."
"Looking at your stupid and fooled look makes me very happy."
"..."
In the face of He Ziming's provocation and meanness, Jiang Zesheng changed his face for the first time in history, but He Ziming was very happy for his painful appearance and showed a very open smile.
Jiang Zesheng looked at He Ziming's smile and immediately understood that the only thing that can make He Ziming happy is his own pain.
Since then, between them, there has been a morbid, twisted entanglement of inexplicable words, love and hate intertwined with feelings...
Most of the time, He Ziming took the initiative to hurt him and sting him.
He Ziming seemed to devote all his energy and attention to him. He never had the intention and was too lazy to entangle with others, as if he would be satisfied as long as he saw his pain.
Have fun and never change your original intention.
When Jiang Zesheng was hurt by him, he was always painful and happy... Although he felt painful for this, it was more like an atonement for him, as if he suffered from Stockholm syndrome. When he is alone, he still has some feelings of fortune, even if He Ziming deals with him and provokes him, what if he is not better than his life goal
Even if they can't be together, it's enough as long as He Ziming is not with others.
It is not that Jiang Zesheng never thought of going from behind the Internet to reality with He Ziming. He once suggested to He Ziming to meet in reality, but He Ziming did not know whether he knew his identity or for other reasons, so he chose to decline to face him... , They can only be the closest friends on the Internet, but in reality they can only be enemies.
Marriage with He Ziming was because Jiang Zesheng knew that He Ziming was too high-profile and eye-catching in the fairness party. It has become a thorn in the eyes of many people. It is thorn in the flesh. The fairness party already wants to get rid of him who has no father and no mother. The secretary-general of the foundation orphans became the top secretary, and the party leader acquiesced, but He Ziming knew nothing about it... Jiang Zesheng learned about this for the first time, and he was suffering from justice when the party’s water was too deep and he could not intervene to save him. However, the Fair Party proposed a marriage to the Reform Party in order to stabilize the alliance...
The leader of the Reform Party was only planning to find two insignificant people to marry, but Jiang Zesheng took the initiative to find him and asked to marry He Ziming.
This was the only way he could think of helping He Ziming at the time.
Married to him, He Ziming is half a member of the Reform Party, and the Jiang family will be his backing. Even if their relationship is not good, He Ziming will be his spouse in name. With such a relationship, as long as Jiang If the family does not fall, no one from the Fair Party can easily move him. If they intend to deal with him, they must be prepared to offend the Reform Party and the Jiang family.
Jiang Zesheng thought that He Ziming would not easily agree to marry him, but He Ziming did not do anything extreme as he expected. Instead, he agreed flatly, only stabbing him a few words when he received the certificate.
After they got married, their relationship became worse, colder, and more alienated...
Jiang Zesheng thought that he and He Ziming would carry through their sick and entangled lives together like this...
But he didn't expect that He Ziming would have an accident.
When he rushed to the hospital and heard the doctor announced that He Ziming had been brain dead, his whole body collapsed. He thought that he and He Ziming had the rest of his life to entangle, but he didn't expect such a thing to happen.
Everyone persuaded him to give up. He Ziming was already brain-dead, so he directly pulled out He Ziming’s oxygen mask, let him go, let him go, and started a new life, but Jiang Zesheng refused... He didn’t want to believe that He Ziming was dead. , I don’t want to believe that He Ziming just let him go so easily, no longer entangled with him...
One year, two years, three years...
He tried all kinds of methods to wake up He Ziming. He Ziming seemed to be really dead, lying there motionless, never staring at him again, and never saying anything to stab him.
But Jiang Zesheng started to feel scared—
If He Ziming is dead, he also feels that being alive is no longer interesting.
He tried to commit suicide several times, but was rescued.
Considering that He Ziming is still breathing, he is not willing to give up hope. If He Ziming is not dead and wakes up, he is dead. Wouldn't He Ziming be with others in the future and forget him
Jiang Zesheng didn't want this, so no matter how painful he was, he could only insist... He couldn't commit suicide, so he started to abuse hallucinogens...
Only when using hallucinogens can he break free from the fear that He Ziming seems to disappear from his life for a moment.
Because he can only see He Ziming again when he uses hallucinogens to produce hallucinations, the living He Ziming...
The hallucinogen severely damaged his body, and everyone around him felt that he could not go on like this.
Thinking that his friend recommended a method of treating vegetative people for him to use He Ziming, that way is to let the consciousness of the vegetative relatives enter the deep level of the vegetative brain, thereby awakening the vegetative consciousness. Jiang Zesheng knows that the friend really wants to save it is not He Ziming, yes. He did not return any hope for awakening He Ziming. All he wanted to save was himself, but after hearing that this method might awaken He Ziming, he did not hesitate to start trying...
Four years, five years, six years...
When Jiang Zesheng’s consciousness first entered He Ziming’s mind, he could not find any traces and fluctuations in He Ziming’s existence, but gradually he began to dream one after another. There were so many bizarre dreams in which he was He can truly perceive He Ziming’s existence. In one of his dreams, he is He Ziming’s younger brother, He Ziming is the crown prince of the royal family. They love and hate, and eventually He Ziming dies. He is heartbroken, and in another dream he is being and He Ziming replaced the destined child. He Ziming eventually went to heart and died for him. He didn’t want to live. There was even a dream in which he was two people. One was He Ziming’s master, the other was his junior, and in the other dream he was Orc, He Ziming is a foolish little Asian beast who is obsessed with him...
Many dreams related to He Ziming are connected together, always making him feel boundless hope.
Every time Jiang Zesheng wakes up, he happily tells his friends that he feels He Ziming's consciousness and that He Ziming is still alive.
But my friend listened to what he said and looked at the device showing that He Ziming was brain-dead without any fluctuations in his brain, but he told him sadly: "He was dreaming. He was affected by the hallucinogen and did not dissipate. Dream. He Ziming is already dead."
Jiang Zesheng didn't want to believe it. He was obsessed with the hypnosis that entered He Ziming's brain consciousness, and he firmly believed that he would be able to awaken He Ziming one day.
Once, twice, three times, ten times, fifty times...
Hundreds of times, a hundred times full of various dreams, He Ziming has not yet woken up.
Pulling away from one's own consciousness many times in a row and entering another person's consciousness to wake up another person is a great harm to the person's body.
In particular, Jiang Zesheng has done so many times one after another, and many people have persuaded Jiang Zesheng to give up...
But Jiang Zesheng has always insisted and refused to give up. He believes that He Ziming is still alive and will wake up one day...
It’s not that there are occasions when frustrated, but at that time, Jiang Zesheng always thinks, even if He Ziming never wakes up, then let him enter He Ziming’s brain again and again in hypnosis, in all kinds of weirdness. He Ziming can die in his dream.
Such a death is much better for him than letting him live alone in a world without He Ziming.