Back in Beijing, it was already nightfall. Xu Tangcheng followed Yizhe out of the station, keeping his head down and not saying a word. YiZhe looked back at him a few times, but he didn't have the chance to meet his gaze, so he finally waited a step and came to him. Holding hands on the street was too conspicuous, so YiZhe reached out and grabbed Xu Tangcheng's wrist.
I was going to take the subway, but seeing the people lining up at the entrance, Xu Tangcheng shook his head: "There are too many people, take a taxi."
The driver who caught up was someone who could talk. From the moment they got on the bus, the driver kept talking to them enthusiastically. After a while, they were all asked where they were, how close they were to Beijing, and where they were studying. Things that should have been handled by Xu Tangcheng were replaced today. Xu Tangcheng leaned on Yi Zhe's shoulders, put his hands in his arms, and listened to him and his master talking with half-squinted eyes.
After a weekend, Xu Tangcheng was still unable to adapt to the upcoming parting. The most obvious manifestation of this inability to adapt is that he is not interested in anything, does not want to talk, and does not want to move. If he does not have to face his family at home, he wants to stay with YiZhe quietly and ignore anyone. .
He has been scratching YiZhe's cuff with one finger, where there is a thread that has fallen out, and he has been dragged and turned many times.
"I'm not always in school, sometimes I need to do research, exchange or something, and also need to measure data," YiZhe said to the driver, and paused, "For example, I'm going to Antarctica in the future."
The line that was circling at a constant speed suddenly stopped and turned back. Xu Tangcheng leaned on YiZhe's shoulder and raised his head, and found that he was also looking at him.
"Are you going to Antarctica?"
"Um."
Xu Tangcheng was a little stunned, and was silent for a while.
"Why... didn't you tell me?"
YiZhe glanced at the driver, then took Xu Tangcheng's cool hand into his palm.
"I just decided, I haven't had time to tell you, and I haven't told the teacher yet. The teacher told me about this before, and I hesitated whether to go or not at that time. After thinking about it, I really need these data for what I do. Yes, so I decided to go."
This news is really extraordinary, Xu Tangcheng did not recover for a long time. He braced himself and wanted to leave YiZhe first, but the moment his face left his shoulders, he suddenly felt great sadness and reluctance.
Antarctica…
It is a place that is too foreign and too far away.
Why are you going to Antarctica all of a sudden
Too weak to do it, Xu Tangcheng simply gave up the idea of sitting upright and leaned back on Yi Zhe's shoulder.
"don’t worry."
Seeing Xu Tangcheng's dazed expression, YiZhe couldn't hold back, raised his hand on the other side, and touched his face.
The face is also cold.
"There won't be any danger," YiZhe didn't know the situation in detail, so he could only try his best to be relieved.
"How long?" Xu Tangcheng asked after being silent for a while.
"A year, I have to prepare for nearly a year before I go."
The taxi turns a corner and the view changes.
"Master," Xu Tangcheng looked at the familiar building and suddenly called out, "Trouble, let's go to Gongti West Road instead."
Yi Zhe looked at Xu Tangcheng puzzled, but Xu Tangcheng didn't explain, but simply nipped his lips. YiZhe was stunned, his eyes widened slightly, while Xu Tangcheng forced a smile and glanced at the driver—it was a pity that he didn't see it.
Yi Zhe felt that Xu Tangcheng that night became arrogant from this moment.
Xu Tangcheng took Yi Zhe to Des. The last time they came, they came to get drunk Cheng Xu. They took off their clothes in the closet, and when they entered, they only wore a sweater. Yi Zhe didn't know why Xu Tangcheng suddenly brought him here, but he only knew that from the beginning, something was wrong with Xu Tangcheng. He was afraid that he would get drunk and that he was in a bad mood, so he was nervous from the moment he entered the door. Unexpectedly, Xu Tangcheng didn't ask for wine, and dragged him directly into the most chaotic and lively dance floor.
When he was walking in, he bumped into someone, the person who was bumped turned around, and then looked at YiZhe with great interest. YiZhe nodded and said sorry, but the man suddenly stretched out his hand and grabbed his arm.
The person next to him waved the hand down, and stood in front of him expressionlessly.
"Yo." The man looked at Xu Tangcheng, rolled his eyes, and smiled.
Xu Tangcheng is rarely fierce once, which is quite cool. He dragged YiZhe away to the center of the dance floor.
"Last time, I thought it was a mess," Xu Tangcheng wrapped his arms around YiZhe's neck, then raised his head, forcing him to bend over and put his ears close to him, "I don't think this is our world, although we are all Man, but we are obviously in love like ordinary couples, that's not the case."
Because the surrounding environment was too noisy, Xu Tangcheng almost shouted. YiZhe didn't know how much effort he used, but his voice sounded hoarse, which made him frown and look at him.
It doesn't matter if you look at it, for many years to come, these clear eyes are not uncommon in dreams.
Xu Tangcheng didn't always want to cry, but the pain was so intense in his heart that he couldn't avoid it no matter what. He used to think that the people here are too crazy and too desperate, and love is not this kind of pleasure-seeking, not this kind of reckless desire' looking at everyone who passes by and revealing it, so he feels suffocated and breathless, because The shock and strangeness here.
He thinks that this is not the world between him and Yizhe, and the love between him and Yizhe is not this kind of arrogance in the dark. He wasn't used to this kind of environment, so he didn't want to stay for a second that time, and wanted to leave quickly with YiZhe and Chengxu. But now, like a deserter, he brought Yi Zhe back here.
Only then did he understand the night here.
How many people were crowded on this dance floor, they twisted and twisted in various, not entirely graceful dances, and various lights and shadows hit everyone's face, but no one could stay. The people here are not all the same. Some people are escaping for a short time, and some people simply give up and sink to the end. In the final analysis, it is just difficult to deal with themselves in reality.
People just think homosexuals are "monsters", but they never thought about why they became "monsters", and they never thought about it, even if they didn't fight, no matter what, if they became the "monster" you call it, that's not done Can the "monster" of bad things be able to live well
Nature will not destroy a species because of "good or bad", but some people can judge that a group of people should not exist.
Xu Tangcheng had never confessed to Yizhe seriously. When he was going to accept Yizhe and be with him, he still borrowed the power of alcohol. But he didn't ask for wine today, and he didn't get drunk. He looked at the person he loved the most in front of him, and every time he blinked, he was extremely sober.
"Yizhe." Xu Tangcheng laughed, but there were tears in his eagerness to join this bizarre relief.
He asked the same question as that night, and in Yizhe's opinion, it was the same as that night, like a colorful typhoon passing by, robbing his breath and heartbeat, but giving him a dream.
"do you want?"
But today was different. Xu Tangcheng didn't wait for Yi Zhe to answer, but leaned over and kissed him after asking. YiZhe quickly held his face, and while kissing back, his thumb moved, wiping away the tears on his cheeks.
A few people around were cheering at them, a belated approval from a stranger.
"I think." Xu Tangcheng said, "I want to kiss you, I want to take you away tonight, I want to go somewhere no one knows us, I don't care what I want..."
How great is love, Xu Tangcheng has never evaded or feared his responsibilities. He has been a good boy for more than 20 years, never rebelled or disappointed his parents. Now, he has a ridiculous person. Thoughts, wanting to fly away with his YiZhe in spite of everything.
Xu Tangcheng wanted to continue, but unrealistic and irresponsible dreams overwhelmed his words. He cried and fell into YiZhe's ear, failing to say the most important thing - I want to love you for the rest of my life.
Yi Zhe's eyes were also red. He kissed Xu Tangcheng, from the center of the dance floor to the corner. Xu Tangcheng's hand reached into his sweater at some point, YiZhe hugged this overly enthusiastic person in a trance, blocked the crowd, pulled down his collar, and kissed from his neck to his collarbone and shoulder blades.
Xu Tangcheng snorted suddenly, then closed his eyes and hugged YiZhe tightly. There was a slight pain in his shoulder, but YiZhe hadn't let go of that soft flesh.
A piece of red ink was placed on the cold white shoulder, YiZhe rubbed his fingers and rearranged Xu Tangcheng's neckline. He didn't know how long the mark would last, but in fact, he should have taken a bite, and the bite bleeds, leaving a scar that Xu Tangcheng could remember when he saw it.
But he couldn't give up.
All night Xu Tangcheng was shouting and venting. At this moment, Yi Zhe finally said the only word.
He hugged Xu Tangcheng tightly and said in his ear with a trembling voice—
"You can't forget me."
On the day Xu Tangcheng left, the two of them stayed up all night. In one night, it is enough to say the advice to eat well and pay attention to safety 800 times.
The departure time of the plane was nearly ten o'clock, and the sky was very bright. Xu Tangcheng asked in a soft voice, "Are you up?"
Yi Zhe was silent for a moment, then turned over and kissed him tightly and long.
As usual, they went to the breakfast shop next to the community for breakfast. YiZhe wanted to pay, touched his pocket, but stopped and looked at Xu Tangcheng. Seeing this, Xu Tangcheng smiled lightly, took out his wallet, and paid.
Seeing YiZhe carrying a box, the boss asked while looking for money, "Are you going out?"
Xu Tangcheng and Yi Zhe didn't speak, and the boss couldn't get an answer. He looked at him a little strangely, and then Yi Zhe nodded and said, "Yeah."
"How long have you been out? I'll be serving fresh steamed buns in two days. My daughter even gave her a wonderful name, Su Sansi'er. Remember to come and try it."
Xu Tangcheng lowered his head and moved his steps. YiZhe on the side said, "We're going far."
"Yo," the boss didn't expect it, and glanced at the small box in YiZhe's hand in surprise, "You guys don't look like you are traveling far."
Xu Tangcheng brought very few things, and did not pack a few clothes, so he brought some personal items, plus a computer, and did not fill a 20-inch suitcase. When he was packing, YiZhe came to help him and brought him some clothes that he usually likes to wear, but Xu Tangcheng hung them back in the closet.
"Leave it, don't bring it."
Even if the reality is a foregone conclusion, he is still superstitious about their togetherness.
If you take away too many things, it is not called living together.
Yi Zhe didn't say anything, everything was up to him, but when Xu Tangcheng came over with the computer, he found that there was a small black bag in the box. He was stunned for a while, then picked up the black bag and asked Yi Che, "Aren't you going to keep it?"
YiZhe shook his head, crouched down beside him, and put the black bag back into the box.
"You..." He looked at the box at first, and after saying this, he cast his eyes on Xu Tangcheng's face, "Occasionally you can take a look."
Xu Tangcheng immediately understood what he meant - "You can't forget me."
It seems that his response at the bar that night was not fully trusted.
He smiled, lowered his head, took out the camera, and closed the zipper in the case.
"I promise, I don't need the reminder of the image. Here," Xu Tangcheng pointed to his head and nodded, "and here, I will remember it clearly. You still keep the camera, you... "
Xu Tangcheng was not afraid that Yi Zhe would forget him. He didn't give YiZhe enough security, but YiZhe gave him too much.
The camera was left to YiZhe because he was afraid that he would miss him too much and would be too hard to be alone.
Besides…
Xu Tangcheng blinked, then raised his head worriedly and warned, "When you miss me, remember to look."
Regarding the way to go to the airport, the two of them talked the night before and had a good understanding. Instead of taking a taxi, they set off early and took the subway to Wudaokou. Xu Tangcheng did not go to the airport in this way. He checked the route in advance and bought two tickets to Sanyuan Bridge at the manual ticket window.
YiZhe stood aside and saw Xu Tangcheng's fingers dodging a ten-yuan note in his wallet and took a fifty-yuan note.
To retrieve the change, Xu Tangcheng did not put it into his wallet as easily as before, but held it together with the ten yuan he deliberately left behind.
"Later..." After walking out of the line, he looked up and asked, "How do you get back later?"
Even though Xu Tangcheng paused briefly when he asked the exit, Yi Zhe still felt that the question was too sudden. He pursed his lips hard and said, "Subway."
Xu Tangcheng listened, nodded, and then lowered his head to sort out the change in his hand. Yi Zhe was waiting for him, but unexpectedly, Xu Tangcheng suddenly stretched out his hand towards him, as if to stuff the things in his hand into his pocket.
This action suddenly brought the problem of the return trip into reality, YiZhe felt a pain in his heart for a moment, and subconsciously reached out and grabbed Xu Tangcheng's wrist to stop him.
Xu Tangcheng also looked back into his eyes silently for a few seconds before explaining to the crowd: "Use it when you go back, you didn't bring your wallet."
There were too many people in the subway station, and YiZhe felt that there were people passing by in front of him, but with his eyes open, he couldn't even see a person's appearance.
He still didn't let go, Xu Tangcheng took a step forward, and their clothes were almost pressed together.
"I'm afraid I'll forget to give it to you later." Xu Tangcheng put his hand on Yizhe's, clenched it tightly, and patted it again.
After putting the money away for YiZhe, he touched it in his pocket again, making sure he had the key to the house, Xu Tangcheng pulled out his hand and took him forward.
The time is approaching the morning rush hour, and although the carriage has not been crowded to an untenable level, there is not a single vacant seat. Fortunately, they only needed to take a few stops on Line 13, Xu Tangcheng dragged Yi Zhe and walked inside, and stopped by the air-conditioning room.
Line 13 is a bit old, but it is a rare above-ground subway in Beijing. Yi Zhe's mind was empty, staring at the street scene flashing outside in a daze, Xu Tangcheng pulled the zipper of his down jacket with one hand and played it up and down.
"Hey," Xu Tangcheng couldn't help but want to talk to YiZhe when he saw YiZhe twisting his neck, not knowing where he was looking, "Don't you even look at me?"
Yi Zhe was stunned, swiped his eyelashes twice, and turned his head.
"I'm afraid to watch too much, I won't let you go later."
In a word, Xu Tangcheng stopped moving.
Someone got out of the car and the seat was vacated, YiZhe gently tugged at Xu Tangcheng: "There is a seat, you go take it."
"No, don't sit down." Xu Tangcheng quickly pulled him back and asked him to come back to him, "It's good to stand here."
Xu Tangcheng didn't expect the transfer on Zhichun Road to be so far. They kept walking along the passage, turning around again and again, going up and down the long or short five or six floors of stairs. Every time Xu Tangcheng thought it was coming, there was still a long way down . What's even more frightening is that there is no elevator in the whole process. Under a high staircase on a certain floor, Xu Tangcheng saw a young couple, the girl was waiting on the stairs with four big boxes, and the boy was carrying it. Turning to look at them, YiZhe was carrying his small suitcase, not even putting it down where he could pull it.
When he finally reached the last flight of stairs, he was more than halfway down, and when he saw the shadow of the subway, Xu Tangcheng turned his head and said casually, "This transfer is similar to Xizhimen's transfer to Line 13."
YiZhe moved the corner of his lips slightly and turned to look at him: "It's good."
Nice what
Xu Tangcheng was stunned and understood.
The transfer road is long, and they can walk for a long time, which is really good.
But he thought again, what to do in that moment. When I came back, I changed directions. It should be... I don't need to take such a long transfer road.
After going down the stairs, the subway just closed the door with the sound of "di-di", and a boy wearing a red shirt and carrying a backpack was waving to the subway. They stood over, the boy in red turned around and left, Xu Tangcheng passed him, turned back, and looked at his back.
The two stations are close to the front of the train. Xu Tangcheng was in a trance due to the fact that he hadn't slept well last night. When the subway was moving at a great acceleration, the rapid movement made Xu Tangcheng in a trance, a bit like when YiZhe took him down the slope that day. look.
The train sped away, throwing out the tail of the red light, and Xu Tangcheng's dizziness suddenly became more severe. He raised his hand and grabbed YiZhe's arm, staring at the dark place, as if the two red taillights hadn't gone away, the light was still shining on them.
"What's wrong?"
YiZhe looked down at him slightly, as always. Behind him, the boy in the red shirt took out his earphones from his clothes, put them on, and turned to leave.
More people came to the platform, talking and waiting.
In his concentrated eyes, Xu Tangcheng suddenly thought of a song. He used to think that it was well written, but now he really understands the scene, and then he understands that it is truly thrilling.
"Saying the oath of giving your life, looking back at the prosperous world, loving you every moment, like a speeding subway."
He thought, people who didn't run away in front of parting are really great, and they can withstand the torrent of their lover standing beside them.
They changed the airport line, got off at the T2 terminal station, and walked a short distance before reaching T1. This is what Xu Tangcheng deliberately did when he bought the air ticket. T1 is the smallest and cleanest.
Xu Tangcheng's luggage was so small that he didn't even need to check it in, so they took the boarding pass and looked around, suddenly not knowing where to go. There was no hurry on the way, and the two of them could not wait to walk slower and slower. Now that the security checkpoint is in front of them, the time for boarding is approaching, and they have no other way to go, no time to delay.
Xu Tangcheng looked at the time, it was nine o'clock.
"Then..." He took a breath. "It's almost there, I'll go in."
YiZhe didn't say a word, just nodded, pulled the box and followed him forward.
There were not many people waiting for the security check, Xu Tangcheng glanced at it, and basically there was no need to line up.
At the entrance, there was a sign saying "Stop Seeing Off". YiZhe saw it, stopped his steps, and looked at it lightly.
In comparison, the Chinese is actually softer. For YiZhe, the English on the brand is more divided, as if he accidentally reminded him in a very official way that he and Xu Tangcheng would no longer be able to communicate with each other in the short term. Use "we" to call - "Passengers Only".
Such cognition over and over again made him almost numb, and he didn't know where to start to feel sad.
Xu Tangcheng also noticed the sign, and he pulled YiZhe's arm to divert his attention. He opened his arms slightly again, barely raised the corners of his lips, and asked in a low voice, "Hug?"
"I still want to say it again, you must pay attention to safety and come back safely." Xu Tangcheng said while holding Yi Che.
"Okay." YiZhe replied obediently.
"Get warm."
"it is good."
"Don't run around."
"it is good."
"Eat well."
"it is good."
What Xu Tangcheng thought and said was trivial to his mother-in-law, but no matter what, Yi Zhe responded.
The traffic of T1 is small. It seems that most of them are people who travel and play. So in the whole hall, only they hugged each other and parted very seriously.
What do you say when you leave
Xu Tangcheng thought in YiZhe's arms.
"Easy."
Nagging to the point where he had nothing to babble on, Xu Tangcheng was silent for a while, bit his lip, and called YiZhe softly.
"Huh?" YiZhe deserved it quickly, as if he had no brains.
Thinking of YiZhe's dazed expression when he saw the sign, Xu Tangcheng's voice went hoarse.
To be honest, this is the last word.
He took a few breaths, calmed down again, and asked, "Do you remember how to get home?"
YiZhe leaned on his shoulders, first he didn't speak, and then he made a muffled sound, as if he didn't understand what he was asking.
"Um?"
"Wait a minute... Go out from the front on the left hand side, that's the way we came... Keep following it until you reach T2, then get off the elevator on the right hand side, go down two floors, and take the subway. Buy the Sanyuanqiao Airport Line first. , 25 yuan per ticket, the money has just been put in your pocket. Then at Sanyuanqiao, transfer to Line 10, take Zhichun Road, then change to No. 13, to Wudaokou. After going out, you can take a taxi or take a bus, You can walk back if it’s not too far away.” He held back and let himself finish these words in as calm a tone as possible, then tightened his arms and asked the person holding him softly, “Remember?”
No "waiting for me", no "I'll be back", no other sensational words, what Xu Tangcheng left him in the end was just a way home.
Yi Zhe didn't understand what Xu Tangcheng wanted to say, it was just the way back, he remembered it.
Xu Tangcheng bypassed the layers of partitions and passed through the security check. YiZhe just stood there watching, and kept waving at him. It wasn't until he moved from side to side, and no matter how he stretched his neck, he couldn't see anyone, and then YiZhe turned around.
The moment he turned around, Yi Zhe understood Xu Tangcheng's parting.
As if all of his strength and thoughts were suddenly relieved, YiZhe stood in the empty hall, unable to perceive anything except the increasing soreness in his eyes.
He took two steps forward and looked around at a loss, only to find that the surrounding area was a vast expanse of white, which was completely different from just now.
turn out to be…
He really didn't know where to go or how to get home.
Xu Tangcheng's words came back to his head, and he stared at the ground blankly for a long time.
Oh, the left hand side... T2...