Sister Luo spoke very slowly and softly. She drove them from the airport to the hotel and chatted casually all the time. Cheng Ke felt very relaxed when she talked to her, but Jiang Yuduo, who was sitting beside him Always a little stiff, this body signal Cheng Ke can clearly feel, resist and tense.
Cheng Ke has been holding his right hand, and his fingertips are gently rubbing in his palm.
When the car stopped at the door of the hotel, Jiang Yuduo clenched his fingers.
"I have time in the afternoon and evening," Sister Luo turned around and said with a smile, "If you want to talk tomorrow, that's fine. I'm on vacation these two days. Let's see what Xiao Jiang's habits are."
"Okay," Cheng Ke nodded, "I'll call you in advance."
After they got off the car, Sister Luo didn't stop there, the car drove away, Jiang Yuduo let out a sigh of relief.
"Let's put things away first," Cheng Ke walked in. "Take a rest, you can decide when Sister Yoluo comes out."
"Afternoon," Jiang Yuduo followed behind him, and changed his words quickly after speaking in the afternoon, "Evening."
"Well." Cheng Ke nodded.
"No, this afternoon." Jiang Yuduo said again.
"Okay." Cheng Ke still nodded.
When checking in at the front desk, Jiang Yuduo said softly, "Now..."
"Now?" Cheng Ke was a little surprised, and waved his hand quickly, "Don't be in such a hurry, the afternoon and evening are quite suitable."
"Go eat something now," Jiang Yuduo said, "I'm hungry."
"Oh." Cheng Ke looked at him and nodded.
Jiang Yuduo was obviously familiar with the city, and he could understand the dialect spoken by the driver when he took Cheng Ke to lunch.
Cheng Ke wanted to ask him if he had lived here for a long time.
But he didn't dare to ask, he didn't know whether this was where Jiang Yuduo once lived or where he spent his childhood.
Jiang Yuduo didn't take him to eat food with local characteristics, but only took him to an ordinary western restaurant, the kind that can be found in every city.
"Is it hot?" Jiang Yuduo asked.
"It's okay," Cheng Ke took off his coat, "my coat is quite thin."
Jiang Yuduo didn't say anything else. After ordering the food, he kept his head down and didn't raise his head again.
Cheng Ke had no appetite, and stopped after taking a few bites, drinking water and looking at Jiang Yuduo.
Jiang Yuduo ate up the steak on his plate, and then took the plate that Cheng Ke hadn't touched a few mouthfuls and ate it up, then wiped his mouth, leaned back in the chair and sighed softly.
"Are you full?" Cheng Ke asked.
"Well," Jiang Yuduo nodded, "I hold it."
"You can eat again when you're hungry," Cheng Ke smiled, "you have to eat like this all at once."
"What if I'm hungry and can't find anything to eat," Jiang Yuduo also smiled, looked up at the window, his face froze for a while, but soon returned to normal, "Cheng Ke."
"Huh?" Cheng Ke followed and looked out, the sky outside was a little cloudy, there were many pedestrians, and cars were coming and going.
"Would you believe it if Sister Luo said anything?" Jiang Yuduo looked back at him.
Cheng Ke hesitated for a moment: "I will judge by myself."
"If I tell you not to believe her," Jiang Yuduo said, "will you listen to me?"
Cheng Ke was stunned.
"Trust her," Jiang Yuduo bit his lip, "don't listen to me."
It took a long time for Cheng Ke to nod his head, and replied in a low voice, "Okay."
Jiang Yuduo called and made an appointment with Sister Luo at 3:30, and made an appointment at a coffee shop not far from the hotel.
"You can play cats," Jiang Yuduo said, "there are more than a dozen cats in that store, and there are all kinds of flowers."
"Well." Cheng Ke responded.
"I won't listen when you guys are talking," Jiang Yuduo said, "I'm going to play with cats."
Cheng Ke didn't speak. He hugged him tightly, turned his head and took a bite on his neck: "It's alright, no matter what I chat with Sister Luo today, our relationship will not change."
"Well." Jiang Yuduo nodded.
"I will help you, I will save you." Cheng Ke said.
"Well." Jiang Yuduo lowered his head and pressed his eyes on his shoulder.
There were very few guests in the cafe in the afternoon. There were only two tables on the outside terrace, and the room was empty.
Cheng Ke and Jiang Yuduo entered the store 20 minutes early and sat down in the corner by the window. Jiang Yuduo walked away before Sister Luo arrived, washed his hands, and sat at the table by the opposite window. teasing the cat before.
Cheng Ke didn't stop him, just stared at a kitten napping on the windowsill next to him.
Sister Luo entered the cafe on time at 3:30, Cheng Ke got up, suddenly a little nervous.
"Am I late?" Sister Luo walked over with a smile.
"No, we came early," Cheng Ke pulled a chair for her, "I want to find a suitable table."
When he wanted to pick up Sister Luo's coat again, Sister Luo smiled and patted his arm: "Your hands are inconvenient, sit down."
Cheng Ke sat down and looked at Jiang Yuduo. Jiang Yuduo was lying on the table with his back to them, and a white cat was lying on the table head-to-head to bask in the sun.
Sister Luo ordered a cup of coffee, and after the waiter walked away, Cheng Ke did not detour, but cut to the subject: "Mr. Luo, I don't know what Jiang Yuduo said to you, and I don't know what I should tell you. What, I only know that Jiang Yuduo is in pain right now, he hopes I can help him... "
Sister Luo nodded.
"What he said was... save him," Cheng Ke said, "how can I save him?"
"Can I get to know your relationship first?" Sister Luo said, "I've known Xiaojiang for ten years, and I've been paying close attention to his condition. Although he has little contact with me in recent years, I still have no relationship with him. There are emotional differences among the patients, so I would like to have a general judgment on Xiao Jiang's decision first."
This question made Cheng Ke a little embarrassed. Their relationship must be unusual. Sister Luo also said that Jiang Yuduo had never mentioned the name of any friend to her, and he had never brought anyone to see her.
Good friends, especially good friends, only friends, no matter what kind of friends, seems to be inappropriate.
Cheng Ke took another look at Jiang Yuduo. Jiang Yuduo didn't tell Sister Luo that he was her boyfriend, because he was afraid that he would mind...
"This, if you don't mind, I want to ask Jiang Yuduo's opinion first." Cheng Ke said.
"It's okay." Sister Luo smiled.
Cheng Ke got up and walked to Jiang Yuduo's side.
Jiang Yuduo was still lying on the table, pinching a cat's ear with his fingers and rubbing lightly, Cheng Ke could see at a glance that his eyes were a little red, but there were no tears.
"Huh?" Jiang Yuduo didn't move, just glanced at him.
"Sister Luo is very protective of you. She wants to know what our relationship is first." Cheng Ke said softly.
"Boyfriend." Jiang Yuduo also said softly.
"Okay, then I'll tell her." Cheng Ke patted his hand.
"You can say anything," Jiang Yuduo said, "you can say whatever you want to her."
"Well." Cheng Ke nodded.
Back at the table and sat down, Cheng Ke cleared his throat: "I'm Jiang Yuduo's... boyfriend."
"I see," Sister Luo was not surprised, she nodded with a smile, "I felt this way when I left the airport."
"Really." Cheng Ke was a little embarrassed.
"Speaking of which, I'm quite surprised." Sister Luo said.
Cheng Ke lowered his head and took a sip of coffee.
"It's not accidental that Xiaojiang can make a boyfriend," Sister Luo smiled, "I'm also surprised that Xiaojiang makes a girlfriend. He has his own definition of intimacy, and it is very difficult to get into the scope of his delimitation. "
Cheng Ke remembered what Jiang Yuduo said about "friends".
"But he believes that people who are friends will go all out to give." Cheng Ke said.
"He is afraid of losing, and all the people he thinks have left his life are because of his mistakes." Sister Luo said, "so in order to avoid mistakes as much as possible, he will try his best to put the requirements of 'friends' as much as possible. Raise it, narrow it down.”
Cheng Ke sighed softly: "It has something to do with his childhood experience, right?"
"When you were young?" Sister Luo looked at him, "Did Xiao Jiang mention it to you?"
"Well, I mentioned some." Cheng Ke nodded.
The expression on Sister Luo's face was obviously a little surprised. After a while, she asked again: "What about?"
"That's right... He didn't talk too much, and he was emotionally unstable every time," Cheng Ke frowned, "I now probably know where he was supposed to be locked up when he was a child, there was... cruel training, and Competition, he mentioned parents, other puppies..."
Sister Luo looked at Jiang Yuduo in surprise for a long time before turning back to look at Cheng Ke: "Did he tell you all this?"
"Yes." Cheng Ke said.
"He never mentioned it to me." Sister Luo looked at him.
Cheng Ke was stunned for a moment, then sat up abruptly.
"But I understand the relevant case," Sister Luo saw his doubts, "Before I contacted him, I knew all about his situation, but he wouldn't take the initiative to tell me, except for you... I didn't take the initiative to tell anyone."
"Well, his best friends don't even know," Cheng Ke breathed a sigh of relief, but the word "case" said by Sister Luo made his heart twitch again, and after a while he looked at Sister Luo , "Who are the parents he said?"
"My biological mother and stepfather." Sister Luo replied.
Cheng Ke felt a chill on his back and his scalp exploded.
"He started 'training' when he was about four years old, so his mother went from being a trusted source to a source of fear, and the damage to him was unimaginable," Sister Luo said, "so he would resist, build intimacy Relationships are very difficult for him."
Cheng Ke was speechless.
"As for the other puppies... they are some bought children," Sister Luo pinched her fingers. "Some people like dog fighting, some people like dog fighting, and some people like to watch them. After these people were caught, the rescued children, There are serious problems, and Xiaojiang is still... relatively good."
"Really?" Cheng Ke couldn't describe his feelings when he heard this.
"The worst child committed suicide when he was 16 years old." Sister Luo sighed.
Cheng Ke was stunned for a long time.
A child committed suicide.
If there is no way out of those pains, perhaps only death can relieve them.
He came back to his senses and suddenly became nervous: "Then Jiang Yuduo..."
"I did some tests on him before," Sister Luo said. "He doesn't have obvious suicidal tendencies. Faced with mental torture, he is different from other children..."
"Can he see those people," Cheng Ke said, "is that the way he faces?"
"It's his way of escape, auditory hallucinations, vision hallucinations, self-mutilation, he let himself continue to live in the pain brought by his previous life," Sister Luo said, "This frees him from the need to face the fact that he will still be in the living room after being rescued. The mentally tormented fact."
It took Cheng Ke two minutes to slowly react to Sister Luo's words: "Self-mutilation?"
"Yes," Sister Luo said, "you should have seen the injuries he suffered after coming into direct contact with 'them'."
"I've seen it." Cheng Ke said softly.
Seen more than once.
On the head, on the hands, those wounds that no one has ever seen.
"Then he..." Cheng Ke frowned, "When he hurt himself, was it unconscious? He didn't know that he hurt himself, or... "
"He knows," Sister Luo picked up the coffee and put it down, "so he will consciously avoid people."
"He knows?" Cheng Ke looked at Sister Luo, he no longer knew what he wanted to say.
"Yes," Sister Luo took a sip of coffee and frowned, "he knows that he has mental problems, that what he sees is not real, that he will hurt himself, and at some point he may also It hurts other people for being out of control."
Cheng Ke felt that his hand was shaking a little bit, so he put down the spoon, put his hand under the plaster, and took a deep breath: "How should I help him?"
"If he can continue his treatment," Sister Luo said, "he can get some control, but..."
"What?" Cheng Ke asked immediately.
"He needs to face and cooperate," said Sister Luo, "he has received a lot of treatment, so what does the doctor ask, what is the purpose of these questions, and what kind of answer can give him a "normal" judgment. It's all clear that if he can't cooperate..."
Cheng Ke felt a little headache, and jumped all the way from the middle of his forehead to the back of his head.
He closed his eyes and sorted out his emotions: "Then this time, he asked me to see you, can it be understood that he began to want to face and cooperate?"
"It's understandable," said Sister Luo, "but how long this state can last, and how much cooperation can be achieved, I can't be sure, but this is indeed a good phenomenon, and I'm very surprised."
Cheng Ke and Sister Luo had been chatting for almost two hours. There was a clock on the wall. Jiang Yuduo didn't look at it, but he could almost estimate it.
He could almost guess what they would talk about.
So now his hands are cold, every joint in his body is stiff, and his mind is blank.
From the moment he asked Cheng Ke for help, anxiety and panic had always surrounded him, and it never disappeared for even a second.
He was afraid that there would be no next year, that Cheng Ke would disappear, and that he would have such a lifetime.
But he also knew very well that all Cheng Ke's guesses about him were just guesses. The moment Sister Luo revealed everything, Cheng Ke faced not only the real him, but also those promises.
It's ok.
nothing.
it is good.
I will help you, I will save you.
No matter what I chat with Sister Luo today, our relationship will not change.
He has already cut off his own way, and even told Cheng Ke, trust Sister Luo, don't trust him.
But what Cheng Ke would do, he didn't dare to think about it at all.
And next year's birthday
And strawberry wine
Do you have a boyfriend...
He didn't know when Cheng Ke sat in front of him, and it was not until Cheng Ke called him softly that he regained his senses and sat up suddenly.
The cat that had been sleeping on the table jumped up and ran away.
"What are you thinking?" Cheng Ke looked at him and smiled.
Jiang Yuduo turned his head and glanced. There was no one at the table, and Sister Luo had already left.
He turned around and looked at Cheng Ke: "Finished talking?"
"Well." Cheng Ke nodded.
Jiang Yuduo looked at him and did not speak.
Cheng Ke looked tired and pale.
"Are you hungry?" Cheng Ke asked, "Do you want to eat something?"
"Not hungry," Jiang Yuduo said, "are we going back?"
"Well," Cheng Ke nodded, "Go back and stay at the hotel tonight. I just booked a flight for tomorrow morning."
"What about when you go back?" Jiang Yuduo asked.
"After I go back, I should be busy with the opening of the store there." Cheng Ke said.
Jiang Yuduo hesitated for a long time, and finally asked softly, "What about me?"
"You're still with me," Cheng Ke said. "It should be quite busy after opening. Would you like to help?"
"Really?" Jiang Yuduo heard his voice tremble.
"Really," Cheng Ke leaned in front of him, "but you have to promise me one thing."
"Well." Jiang Yuduo responded.
"From now on, no matter what you see or hear," Cheng Ke said, "tell me."
Jiang Yuduo looked at him.
"I'll hold you, pull you, and save you," Cheng Ke said, "I won't let go, but you want me to hold you, you know?"
Jiang Yuduo nodded.
"It's said that you like someone, you give without expecting anything in return," Cheng Ke said. "That's bullshit. If I give, you have to repay me. If I hold you, you can't get rid of me, understand?"
"Understood." Jiang Yuduo said.