The memory ends with a whole street of flashing red lights and blaring sirens.
I passed out on the helicopter due to high fever and exhaustion, and was awakened by the piercing pain in the palm of my hand when I was dealing with the wound.
When I woke up, all I could think about was Qi Shu's last look at me, and his figure disappearing into the ruins to save me.
I grabbed Zhou Chen and cried while asking him where is Qi Shu, where is Qi Shu...
He told me not to be afraid, saying that Qi Shu was being rescued.
The wound was so painful, my fingers connected to my heart, even a slight touch made me break out in cold sweat and tears flowed uncontrollably.
The doctor said that luckily among the misfortunes, I didn't hurt any bones, and I could continue to play the violin when the skin and flesh healed.
I don't care about my hands, I just want to know how Qi Shu is doing.
Zhou Chen couldn't hold back me, and finally told the truth. Watching his lips open and close, my heart gradually fell into the ice cave.
—Broken ribs, massive internal bleeding, severe head injuries, burns on the back, broken leg bones... There is not a single intact part of the whole body.
I could hear it hard to breathe, and I couldn't get out of breath.
I just hurt my hand so hard to bear, how much pain should Qi Shu have...
The operation lasted for a full twenty hours, and Qi Shu was pushed into the intensive care unit after the operation was over.
He was so badly injured that his whole body was filled with various tubes, and his chest barely rose or fell.
I couldn't get into the ward, so I could only lie on the glass window outside and watch him.
The way he closed his eyes was very peaceful, even though he was down and haggard to this point, his eyebrows and eyes were still dignified.
He should play in the world, always be proud, and always act recklessly.
Should not be lying here.
It was me who killed him.
"Is he going to be okay?" I asked choked up.
Zhou Chen stood behind me and did not answer in silence. After a while, he asked me: "If so, what are you going to do?"
I have no idea.
I only know that if something happens to Qi Shu, there is absolutely no way for me to live with peace of mind.
The hospital corridor was empty and quiet, and after a long time, a sigh came from behind: "He still has something he can't let go of, and he won't let himself die."
Really...but he looks like he's about to shatter.
Forty-eight hours later, Qi Shu was out of danger and was transferred to the general ward. After another three full days, he finally opened his eyes.
When I went in, the doctor was examining him. When he saw me, he turned his head and smiled slightly, and said, "Xiaoyu."
His face was pale, his whole body was thinner, even his lips were bloodless, and he looked extremely weak.
After confirming that the vital signs were normal, the doctors and nurses left the ward. I walked over and sat by the bed, my nose sore involuntarily.
"Don't cry," he said.
I tried to hold back my tears and asked, "Are you okay?"
He shook his head, "It hurts."
Qi Shu has always been very precious, and even if there is a small bump, he has to ask a family doctor to see him. One can imagine how uncomfortable he is now.
"I'm sorry...it's all me..."
"Is there only three words you can say to me?" he interrupted me softly, "I'm sorry?"
I choked, not knowing how to answer.
His gaze fell on my gauze-wrapped hand, he frowned, and asked, "Is the injury serious?"
"Nothing serious… "
"When you stretched out your hand, I knew it was going to be difficult." He looked at my face, probably because he was weak, and spoke slowly, "You are so precious to your own hand, but you are willing to stand in front of him."
Qi Shu is right, I care about my hands very much, because only when I pick up the bow, I will feel that I am also valuable.
"There's one thing I haven't told you. In fact, you don't cook well."
He changed the subject abruptly and even chuckled under his breath.
"But I always let you do the cooking, because I like to see the way your hands are covered with oily smoke for me."
"I know that Zhou Chen is different from me. He will love you and make you happy. I'm a bastard. I just like to see you cry."
"You were right to leave me."
I don't know why he is telling me this.
"I know I don't cook well. If you eat very little every time, then I will be very sad."
Talking about the past now, it suddenly feels like a dream.
"I've tried my best, but I don't seem to be able to figure it out. With the same ingredients and the same steps, what I cook just doesn't taste good."
"If you can't do it well, don't do it." He said, "I don't want you to cook for Zhou Shen at all. If that happens, I will be the only person in the world who has eaten your cooking."
After finishing speaking, he went on to deny this sentence, "Forget it... When you like someone, you can't wait to hold the whole world in front of him. It's because I didn't understand it before, and I thought you didn't love me enough."
"Now that I think about it, it's ridiculous. I thought you liked Wen Yan."
"Once when I went to pick him up, I saw you standing under the tree talking and laughing. Your eyes were bright and your face was so cute. At that time, I thought, I must get this little thing, but after I got it, you never showed me that way." expression."
"I'm going crazy with jealousy. I can't think of any other way to prove that you are mine except to torture you."
I was shocked that Qi Shu had such a misunderstanding about me, and I remembered the day he said that I felt shy and happy because I saw him from a distance.
As for later... I racked my brains to curry favor with him, so naturally I couldn't express my feelings freely.
It turned out to be wrong from the beginning...
He would attack me because of a plate of fruit, probably because I guess he likes Wen Yan's pheromones, so he always prepares lychees for him.
He would be furious when I mentioned Wen Yan, probably because he thought I wanted to leave him and be with Wen Yan.
After I transplanted the glands, he bit me so frantically, maybe at some point he really wanted to give me a permanent mark.
I wanted to explain, but I couldn't speak when I opened my mouth.
That's it, forget it.
Qi Shu looked at me with a lost expression.
"I told you a lot of lies."
"You're not good-looking, you're not cute, you're not likable enough, it's all fake."
"I'm just afraid of showing my weakness."
"Actually, I like roses very much. You are better than roses."
"Your love is also very good."
"I owned it before," he said lightly, looking at the ceiling, "it's even more difficult to let go."
After saying this, he seemed to be tired at last, his eyes fell on a certain point in the air, and he stopped looking at me.
After a long time, the effect of the medicine and the fatigue caused by the pain made him fall into a deep sleep again.
The afternoon sun outside the window has turned into a yellowish twilight, the day is over, and so are the two of us.
This relationship has taught me how to love properly and hopefully it has taught him too.
I touched the corner of his lips carefully, it was soft.
"The next time you fall in love with someone else, don't be so stubborn."
"And don't be afraid to show your weaknesses."
"The weakness in love is the armor."
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Today's playlist: "The Lonely Patient"
[If we don't talk about loneliness, we will all be happy]
The one surnamed Wen is not dead yet, how could Qi Zai die