"Watch your step!"
Dou Sheng struggled to get up and turned on the lights in the room. The light suddenly became brighter, and Xie Lan subconsciously closed his eyes to avoid it, with his feet hanging a few millimeters off the ground.
After a while, he slowly opened his eyes and looked at the floor in front of him.
It's so miserable and unbearable to watch.
A bowl of snail noodles basically covered the empty space on this side of the bed. There was soup and ingredients, red, yellow, green, black and white mixed together, which was breathtaking. The room was filled with an indescribable smell, not very strong, but very strong, as if it would not disappear even if left for a hundred years.
Not to mention Chinese, even in English, Xie Lan would find it difficult to express the shock he felt at the moment.
Dou Sheng was standing beside the bed. When the two of them were in a stalemate, Wutong, who was lying on the pillow, stood up, sniffed quickly with his pink nose, and then his cat body froze.
Xie Lan clearly and distinctly saw it retching, or in Che Ziming's words - ejaculating.
Wutong tucked his tail between his legs, jumped off the bed with a plop, stepped on the floor that luckily wasn't dirty, and quickly left the room along the wall.
The moment the cat's shadow disappeared, Xie Lan became furious and grabbed Dou Sheng by the collar.
Dou Sheng exclaimed in surprise: "Ah! I didn't stand firmly!"
It was too late. Xie Lan had never thought that his center of gravity was on one foot. With this pull, he lost his balance and fell down, while Xie Lan was in mid-air. Both of them were finished.
Xie Lan lost his balance and leaned backwards. In his field of vision, Dou Sheng's face blocked the glaring light above his head. Perhaps it was because the viewing distance was too close. Although it was clearly backlit, the outline in the shadow seemed clearer than in the daytime.
With a thud, the two men collided face to face. Xie Lan was pinned down by Dou Sheng, whose hips slammed into his waist, causing him pain.
Xie Lan seemed to be stunned and didn't say a word for a long time.
Dou Sheng's pajamas rubbed gently against his arm, and it was very soft. In contrast, the hip bone on his waist seemed particularly hard, not only painful, but also making people feel inexplicably irritated. In addition to the hip bone, another thing that stood out was Dou Sheng's leg diagonally between his legs, and his other foot that was placed close to his foot.
The comfortable distance that Xie Lan had been maintaining was once again abruptly broken. He could hear Dou Sheng's breathing beside his ear, and even smell the minty scent of shampoo coming through Dou Sheng's hair.
After a long time, Dou Sheng finally raised his hands to support the mattress, knelt down on the leg that was pressing on him, and used his knees to push his body up.
He stood up and limped to the side, explaining in a low voice: "I sprained my ankle when you kicked me down just now, and I can't stand steadily."
"How can you say that?" Xie Lan asked subconsciously.
Dou Sheng didn't retort and seemed to be in a daze. There was an awkward silence in the room.
It took a long time for Xie Lan's brain to resume working.
"You sprained your ankle?" He looked down at Dou Sheng's ankle, "Are you okay?"
Dou Sheng sighed, turned around and limped to the next door, "I don't know if you're okay, I'll clean up the floor first, I'm afraid my mom will get angry."
“… … ”
Xie Lan looked at the mess on the ground, feeling a little confused for some reason.
He was so dazed that he couldn't even smell the smell. Maybe he had become numb from the intoxication.
"Aren't you afraid of me?" he asked subconsciously.
Dou Sheng said calmly in the next room: "What's so scary about you? You really respect Chinese food culture and you really understand the significance of making videos. My mom is totally on a different level than you. If she had as much depth as you, she wouldn't have made it difficult for me."
Xie Lan: “?”
He hadn't reacted to the previous wave yet, but was shocked by this one. If he said that, it seemed like it was his fault, as if he had failed to live up to Dou Sheng's trust.
Xie Lan sat on the bed, his thin black vest sticking to his skin. He still felt a little strange where Dou Sheng's hip bone had hit him. While Dou Sheng was away, he quickly lifted his vest and took a look at his waist.
—No red or blue, nothing unusual, I don’t know where that strange sense of existence came from.
Dou Sheng came back soon, holding a mop in his left hand and a bucket in his right hand. He took off his pajamas, leaving only a black vest that looked exactly like Xie Lan's. He limped over, put the bucket on the ground, and leaned over to mop the floor.
The vest fit Dou Sheng's outline closely. The right shoulder blade was right in front of Xie Lan, along with the muscle lines on his shoulders and arms, which rose and fell with the push and pull of the mop.
The impact when the two of them fell just now seemed to have triggered some strange associative thinking in Xie Lan. He seemed to suddenly have a sense of Dou Sheng's entire body skeleton, or he became curious about it. His eyes subconsciously looked towards his hips, then to his thighs, and then upwards to his waist, shoulders and collarbones.
Xie Lan suddenly discovered that there was a very light red layer around Dou Sheng's collarbone, and then upwards, his neck and ears were all a little red.
"Are you hot?" he asked suddenly without any context.
He was actually quite hot himself.
Maybe summer is really coming, I feel hot in the early morning.
Dou Sheng paused for a moment.
After a moment, he continued mopping the floor, put the soiled mop into the bucket to clean it, and said calmly, "It's not hot. Are you hot?"
Xie Lan didn't say anything else. After a while, his eyes fell on the foot that Dou Sheng didn't use any force on, "Leave it there, I'll do it."
"No need." Dou Sheng immediately shook his head and made a move to reach out and push him back, but his hand didn't touch Xie Lan's shoulder and hesitated. After a moment, he retracted his hand and said lightly: "It's not a big deal if it's sprained. Your arm is precious, forget it."
Xie Lan could only stay in bed, watching him mop the floor halfway through, and then carry the bucket out to change the water. The sound of water splashing in the bathroom next door continued, and the surroundings were quiet. He suddenly remembered that it was the middle of the night.
He was a little confused and subconsciously opened his phone.
The first video pushed on the upper left corner of the B station homepage was actually Gongzi Ye Shen's, with a tag for a call for submissions, and the title of the video was "I carefully prepared a meal, but was beaten up"
This kind of title is very eye-catching and really makes people want to click in. The video was only released four hours ago, but the number of views has already reached nearly 200,000. This is the best performance of Nox recently. No wonder it was pushed to the homepage.
The sound of water next door stopped, and Xie Lan stuffed the phone back under the pillow.
He was a little uneasy, not because of the video of Young Master Ye Shen, but because of an indescribable feeling.
Maybe it was because of the hit on his waist - until now, he still felt a little uncomfortable where Dou Sheng's hip bone hit him. He couldn't tell whether it was painful or itchy, but something was wrong.
Just as Xie Lan was about to lift up his vest to take a closer look, Dou Sheng came back with a bucket and a mop, so he had to give up.
Dou Sheng put the bucket down and continued mopping the floor while saying, "By the way, have you seen this kind of prank video before? This kind of video is actually not easy to make, because people's natural reactions are hard to control. Like just now, you woke up earlier than I expected, and your reaction was even stronger, which instantly raised the atmosphere and ended it. Although the show effect is good, it can't support a complete video."
Xie Lan was uneasy and could hardly listen to what he said. She just stared at his silhouette in a daze.
Dou Sheng used the mop as a crutch and continued, "Why don't we just shoot a scripted scene? You wake up in the middle of my meal and act according to the script. It doesn't matter if it's fake or not. After the main film is over, we'll put the real reaction at the end and tell everyone directly that the first part is the script and the second part is reality. What do you think?"
Xie Lan was stunned for a moment, "Do you want to use the material just now?"
At this moment, whenever Xie Lan thought of the material just now, he could immediately recall the way the two of them fell together, and even recalled the feeling of having half of Dou Sheng's body pressed underneath him, which made him feel a little breathless.
Dou Sheng was stunned. "Can't use it? Oh, you don't want people to see you sleeping, right? Actually, I just saw it on camera, you look photogenic when you're lying there, really, only your shoulders and above are exposed outside the quilt, and your shoulder lines are very nice, because your collarbone is straighter than most people's..."
As he spoke, he gestured at his collarbone. Xie Lan glanced over and suddenly felt as if he had been burned. He immediately said, "No!"
This voice was several pitches higher than his usual voice. He was startled when he heard it. He paused for a moment before shaking his head and saying, "Don't use this material."
Dou Sheng looked a little confused, "Why?"
Xie Lan frowned and said, "I don't want to use this material anyway, so forget it."
Dou Sheng's expression was a little stiff, and he didn't say anything for a long time.
Xie Lan felt the irritability that had just been suppressed coming up. He couldn't tell what it was, but he felt like a needle was pricking his chest. It wasn't anger, nor was it disgust, but a kind of uneasiness that was difficult to express.
He really wanted to run for a few kilometers, letting the cold air fill his lungs. Or, just pull open Dou Sheng's trousers and see if there was a thorn on his hip that could make him feel so uncomfortable.
He paused, then got off the bed from the other side and pushed open the window.
—There was not a breath of wind outside.
There was a subtle silence in the room for a while.
After a long while, Dou Sheng finally smiled and said, "The smell in this room is too strong. It makes you irritated. Come to my room to sleep tonight."
"No need." Xie Lan said quickly.
He regretted what he said as soon as he said it. He didn't know what was going on tonight. He was like a robot with the default volume turned up high. He could only repeat words like "No" and "No need" at a volume that he could never reach at other times.
Dou Sheng didn't say anything for a long time, then lowered his head and continued mopping the floor.
Xie Lan looked back at him and found that his sprained foot was firmly planted on the ground, and he was mopping the floor much faster than before. He quickly mopped the floor, carried the bucket back to the house to change the bucket of water, and came back to mop the floor in silence for the last time, until there was no stain on the floor, and it was even a little shiny because of the water, reflecting Dou Sheng's tall, thin and upright figure.
Dou Sheng picked up the bucket and said, "Forget it, I'll try a different idea for this video. Sorry for disturbing you, go to sleep."
His voice was cold, and before Xie Lan could react, the man had already walked away with the bucket.
Then, there was a loud bang from the door of the next room.
In the quiet building, only Xie Lan's door was wide open, leading to the empty corridor.
Xie Lan was stunned for a while.
Are you angry already
Why
He frowned and stared at the door for a long time. Just as he was about to walk back to the bed, the door of the bedroom next door suddenly opened again.
Dou Sheng walked to Xie Lan's door carrying a bag of new snail kings and another camera, and said coldly, "I'm the one who made this room smell. The other two guest rooms in the house are clean. You can sleep in any one of them."
As he spoke, he took his things and walked downstairs. Xie Lan couldn't help but ask, "Why are you angry?"
"What do you care about me?" A cold reply came from downstairs.
Xie Lan frowned and followed, "So what are you going to do now?"
"Record a new video." Dou Sheng turned around at the kitchen door and looked at him coldly. "It's not that I can't survive without making spoof videos. My fans are the most culturally educated on the site. I'm going to make a serious snail noodle eating show to promote Guangxi's intangible cultural heritage. How can no one watch it?"
Xie Lan was stunned for a while, "What? Guangxi is not what... culture what?"
Dou Sheng went straight into the kitchen and said, "You won't understand even if I tell you."
Soon the sound of boiling water was heard in the kitchen. Although Dou Sheng was angry, he did not slam the door, which was still open.
Xie Lan watched him skillfully place the camera tripod next to the pot, and change the angles to shoot the water gradually boiling. After the water boiled, he added the vermicelli, shook it out, and took a close-up. After holding the camera for three minutes, he turned off the heat, scooped out the vermicelli, put it in a bowl, boiled water in another pot, threw in the seasoning, and added the vermicelli.
Dou Sheng was very familiar with the process of cooking noodles. When he turned around to throw away the garbage, Xie Lan found that he had left a packet of ingredients out, so he threw it directly into the trash can.
The pot soon began to boil, with steam filling the air. Dou Sheng brought the snail noodles to the table, lifted it up with a box, and set up the camera.
Then, he raised his head and gave Xie Lan a cold look.
Xie Lan frowned immediately.
It’s not that he doesn’t have a temper. When Dou Sheng looked at him, he turned and left.
But when he reached the bottom of the stairs, he suddenly heard the sound of someone sniffing powder in the kitchen, and he couldn't help but stop.
As if possessed by a ghost, he walked back, stood at the door and peeked in a low-key manner, just in a position to see Dou Sheng.
The camera was very close, Dou Sheng didn't speak to the camera, he just concentrated on eating noodles.
The noodles should be very hot when they are just out of the pot, but he doesn't mind. He puts the radio on the collar of his vest and slurps the soup from the bowl, sucking the noodles in a cool and neat manner. Adolescent boys are the least slow when eating, and they are very provocative, making people feel hungry just by looking at them.
Xie Lan sniffed subconsciously. For some reason, the noodles she cooked this time didn't seem to have any odor at all. Instead, they had a fresh fragrance. In the middle of the night, it was even somewhat tempting.
He stood at the door and openly watched Dou Sheng eat noodles, watching him pick up noodles with his fingers pinching the far end of the chopsticks, his wrist bones moving slightly, and his Adam's apple sliding gently on his white neck when he swallowed.
About three to five minutes later, Dou Sheng let out a long sigh, stood up and took out a can of ice cola from the refrigerator, limped back to the camera, opened it with one hand, tilted his head back and gulped it down.
Then he burped comfortably, raised his chin towards the camera, put the Coke can on the table for a moment, and quickly pressed the stop button with his other hand.
It’s a video, with no talking and random camera movements, but it’s full of sense of situation and very youthful.
After turning off the phone, Dou Sheng sat in his seat for another half a minute, his expression still cold. Suddenly, he raised his eyes and looked in Xie Lan's direction.
Just as Xie Lan was about to turn around and leave again, he stood up.
"I've left a bite for you in the pot. Eat it if you like it. If you don't like it, throw it away." He casually picked up the dishes and put them into the dishwasher, brushed past Xie Lan, and left a cold sentence.
Xie Lan was stunned for a moment before saying, "The camera you just left in my room."
"Just leave it there." Dou Sheng went upstairs in his slippers, "I have plenty of cameras."
Then, the door of the upstairs bedroom closed and the house fell silent.
This person has such a bad temper.
Xie Lan couldn't help but frowning, turned around and wanted to leave, but suddenly remembered something.
He paused for a moment before turning back into the kitchen, taking out a bowl and scooping out the noodles that Dou Sheng had stewed in the pot.
The room was quiet. Before Xie Lan started, he suddenly felt a little lonely. He subconsciously looked up at the ceiling for a long time, sighed softly, took out his mobile phone and reluctantly opened the video of Young Master Ye Shen.
The taste of snail rice noodle is different from what I imagined, or rather, without that stinky smell, the snail rice noodle itself is quite delicious. The soup is very fresh, and the noodles are very chewy, which is more special than the rice noodles outside Ximen.
As Xie Lan ate, he felt that Dou Sheng might not have lied to him. This was really something... Anyway, it was something with ethnic cultural characteristics.
He sighed helplessly, and while eating, he scrolled back the progress bar of Ye Shen's video. After watching for a while, he scrolled back again.
To be fair, the effect of this video by Ye Shen is really good. He spent a lot of money to buy raw ham, black truffles and other ingredients from the import supermarket, and used very strange seasonings to make a table of dark dishes for his parents. The idea is very ordinary, but the emotional contrast before and after is well grasped. As for the half minute of being beaten at the end, at least it is pure comedy, which is quite funny.
Xie Lan sighed at the empty bowl and cell phone in front of him.
If this is the case, Dou Sheng’s pure eating video will probably be suppressed.
How can that be possible
How could the most handsome man in the world bow down to such a bitch
Xie Lan picked up the empty bowl and put it into the trash can, then looked up at the ceiling and sighed.
In fact, he vaguely knew why Dou Sheng was angry, but he was not so sure.
At three o'clock in the morning, the whole house fell silent.
There was no sound from upstairs or downstairs, and it was pitch black under the doors of the two bedrooms on the first floor.
But Xie Lan didn't sleep. He sat at the table with the desk lamp on. On the table was the camera that Dou Sheng left in his room. The memory card was taken out and placed in the card reader, and the other end was connected to an iPad.
The iPad belongs to Dou Sheng. He put it in his schoolbag during the day, and now he just happens to be using it.
The editing software that comes with the tablet is very average, and it is even more troublesome to operate without a mouse, but fortunately the material just now was only one and a half minutes long, so even for fine editing it would not be much work.
Xie Lan did a very attentive job. Dou Sheng's eating show just now had a kind of moving beauty in stillness, and a kind of silence that was detached from life. So as the easter egg at the end, the greater the contrast of this video, the better, and the more hilarious the atmosphere, the better. Only with such ups and downs in emotions can the program effect be directly enhanced, and the simply funny show next door will be nothing in comparison.
Xie Lan's fingers moved quickly on the screen, as nimbly as playing a violin. He selected a lively and funny background music, mixed in a few bells with reminder effects, and added them at the moments when he turned over twice. When he finally woke up and turned around, he even added a big head special effect to himself (Dou Sheng), drew a circle of white edges on the spilled snail noodles, and drew radial lines. As the snail noodles fell inch by inch, he pushed and pulled the rhythm of the video again, and finally made a two-minute easter egg.
By the time everything was done, it was already four in the morning.
Xie Lan stretched himself and went into the bathroom to take a shower.
The hot water splashed on his body, and Xie Lan stood under the shower feeling a little dazed.
In fact, he didn't know what was wrong with him. He absolutely, absolutely didn't hate Dou Sheng. He even had a tolerance for Dou Sheng that was significantly greater than that of other people. It was just that at a certain moment, he would instinctively want to run away, uncontrollably. Maybe it was like the relationship between the second cat and the big cat. When the second cat first came to the big cat's territory, it was willing to accept the big cat licking its fur, but when the big cat approached, it would still tremble for a moment.
And the posture when he fell just now was indeed a little... weird.
It was something weird that he didn't want to recall.
Xie Lan dried her hair, came out of the bathroom and picked up the iPad.
After thinking for a while, he hugged his pillow.
4:30.
Xie Lan stood at the door of Dou Sheng's room, looking at the sign that said "Closed for Today". He hesitated for a moment, then whispered, "It's time to go to bed."
Almost instantly, a cold reply rang out in the room, "What are you doing?"
There was silence for a few seconds, and then the voice paused and said, "We're out of snail noodles. If you want to eat it, cook it yourself."
"?"
Xie Lan was a little confused, and returned to normal voice and said: "I don't eat snail noodles. Are you awake? I'm going in?"
There was no response from the room. After a while, the sound of Dou Sheng getting down from the bed was heard. A few seconds later, the door opened, and Dou Sheng appeared at the door with the moonlight behind him.
The surroundings were dim, and the indifferent black eyes froze for a moment when he saw the pillow that Xie Lan was holding, and then the indifference seemed to fade a lot in an instant.
After a long while, Dou Sheng asked, "What do you want to do?"
"I can't sleep. The room stinks and I can't sleep. So I came here to sleep with you." Xie Lan muttered, pushed him aside and squeezed in through the door, throwing the pillow onto Dou Sheng's bed.
With a bang.
Dou Sheng seemed to be frozen at the door. After a long while, he slowly closed the door.
"Are you willing to come now?" His tone was still not very enthusiastic. "I'm telling you, if you pass that village..."
His voice stopped abruptly, he turned around and stared at Xie Lan.
Xie Lan had already gotten on the bed, and he moved to the window side with his pillow and lay down.
"What village did we pass? What does it mean?" he asked casually.
Dou Sheng: “…Nothing.”
Xie Lan sat down and patted the bed. "I found that you are a bit weird. I was a bit dazed when I fell just now, and you started to get angry before I could react. Oh, by the way, I edited this material. You can put it at the end of the eating show. The audience likes reversals."
This time, Dou Sheng was confused. "It's cut out?"
"Yeah." Xie Lan threw the iPad onto his pillow. "Am I okay?"
He pulled Dou Sheng's blanket over himself, then lay down with his back to him, yawning and saying, "No need to thank me too much. Reflect on your strange temper."