In the Auxiliary Temple, the national teacher Fan Luo had just finished reporting the disappearance of "Ouyang Madness" after hearing He Xiang crying, and then received the emperor's order to keep his new priest "Wei Xiaobao" by his side to assist him. Investigate the whereabouts of a thief, poultry businessman Nie Bufan.
"Wei Xiaobao?" Fan Luo reclined on the wooden couch and hummed. That guy is really troublesome. He was dragged away by the emperor after not seeing him for an hour or two, and he dared to use a false name. Do you think he is living too happy
"Sir?" He Xiang called out worriedly.
"It's alright, don't worry about him." Although he had only known each other for a while, Fan Luo had an intuition that this guy wouldn't die, and he really wanted to see how the emperor would deal with him
"It is a great honor for the emperor to give you the book, you must not let down the emperor's kindness." The eunuch took Nie Bufan to a room and instructed, "Go bathe and change first, and the clothes are ready for you. already."
Nie Bufan held a stack of clothes and asked humbly, "This father-in-law, what exactly does Shishu do?"
The eunuch replied with a blank face: "The so-called servant book is mainly to record the emperor's daily words and preferences, including poetry, famous paintings and calligraphy, spices, etc. In addition, he is also responsible for arranging books for the emperor, selecting suitable reading materials, and giving them to the emperor when necessary. study."
Nie Bufan looked at the sky, hahaha three times in his heart. There are so many talents in the palace, why is the emperor's brother so obsessed, looking for him as a semi-illiterate servant? Read to him? Does the three-character script work
After bathing, Nie Bufan, who was dressed neatly, was taken by the eunuch to the emperor's bedroom, but he did not enter through the main entrance, but went around from the side compartment into a small room of no more than 30 to 40 square meters. The decoration of the room is very simple, only the table, cushions and the four treasures of the study.
"When the emperor is in the bedroom, you stay here. If the emperor doesn't call you, don't make a sound, just record it quietly." The eunuch taught, "If the emperor goes to bed, you and other eunuchs will organize the emperor's desk together. Any calligraphy and paintings must be properly stored. Then choose a book for the emperor and place it in the upper left corner. Generally, the books that the emperor has read will be placed in the upper right corner."
"Oh." Nie Bufan looked at the boxy little room, and pouted to himself, asking him to stay here, he would probably be suffocated in a few days.
"In addition," the eunuch reminded again, "you can't touch any memorials and documents that the emperor brought back to the palace."
Nie Bufan smiled and replied, "I must not touch it."
The eunuch nodded: "After doing this, you can go to rest, and someone will take you to a place to live. When you are ugly, you have to get up and stand by in the bedroom. Sometimes the emperor will ask you to go to the imperial garden with you. , listen to your study or chat. Although it is only temporarily acting as a bookkeeper, it is necessary to be cautious in words and deeds, and it is impossible to make mistakes."
As he said this, a eunuch walked in outside and whispered, "The emperor has returned to the palace, and he will not be called to bed tonight."
Only then did the preaching eunuch let Nie Bufan go, and after a few more warnings, he left.
When everyone was gone, Nie Bufan went everywhere, looking at the small window on the wall, bored.
His ears moved, and he heard the footsteps of several people from far and near, followed by greetings and changing clothes.
After a while, a few people withdrew, and the palace became quiet for a moment.
"Wei Xiaobao, come out." The emperor came over in that deep voice.
Nie Bufan slowly stood up, walked out from behind the screen, and bowed to the emperor who was sitting on the couch according to the etiquette taught by the eunuch just now.
The emperor looked him up and down, and smiled: "It looks very handsome in this way."
Nie Bufan kept silent, watching his nose and heart.
"Tell me, where are you from? How did you meet the national teacher? Why did he bring you into the palace?"
Nie Bufan stole a glance at him and replied, "Xiaobao is from Xishan. He just entered the capital not long ago, and he met the national teacher by chance. As soon as he saw it, he brought Xiaobao into the palace."
"It's that simple?" It was really hard for the emperor to imagine who Fan Luo would "get it right at first sight"
"It's that simple." Nie Bufan nodded affirmatively.
"Then why were you arrested by the guards as a thief?"
Nie Bufan showed an unfortunate expression, and told the whole story in a few words.
"Can you see what he looks like?" the emperor asked again.
"No." But as long as he has the guard uniform, he is sure to find people out, but unfortunately he doesn't want to meddle in this business, so the emperor should worry about it himself.
The emperor was lost in thought, his brows furrowed.
Nie Bufan thought to himself: Actually, he didn't care so much on the surface.
"Can you play chess?" the emperor asked suddenly.
"Won't."
"How about playing the piano?"
"Won't."
The emperor sighed and waved his hand: "Then just read something to me."
He lay on his side on the couch, rubbing his brows.
Nie Bufan walked to the book desk, picking and choosing, skipping the ones with many words, and choosing a picture book.
Go back to the emperor, open the first page - drink, it's so fragrant! It is directly a picture of a man and a woman embracing intimately.
"What's wrong? Why don't you read it?" the emperor asked.
"Your Majesty, are you sure you want to read?"
"Of course, read it."
Nie Bufan cleared his throat and read: "Di Shenren is quiet and has a good spring night, and all the heart flutters are gone."
The emperor frowned and opened his eyes suddenly.
Nie Bufan turned to the second page and continued: "Fight against the gums and grind together."
"Although the body is different and smells good, it's natural and it's natural." Nie Bufan shook his head as he read, and was very intoxicated.
With a swoosh, the picture album in his hand was pulled away, and the emperor flipped through the pages calmly, and said, "You actually write lewd poems on the pictures of the erotic palace?"
Nie Bufan said innocently: "The emperor asked me to read it, even if it is a wordless scripture, it must be read."
"Can't you choose a book with words?"
"This should be the right time to relieve loneliness and troubles."
The emperor sneered: "I really didn't expect the national teacher to choose you as a priest? He never disdains this."
"Are you disdainful or not good at this?" Nie Bufan asked sneakily.
"What's the difference?"
"If it's just disdain, then it's hard to tell whether the national teacher is clean or experienced. Maybe he's pursuing the realm of not touching a leaf among the flowers." Nie Bufan said solemnly, "If you're not good at this, The emperor should supervise him in due course and help him get involved as soon as possible, so as not to die alone in the future with no successor."
The emperor was dumbfounded, unable to speak.
Nie Bufan added, "Don't look at sexual matters in a different light. It's very serious and normal. As a gentleman who is considerate of his ministers, how can he not pay attention to the physical and mental health of his ministers?"
"Well... what you said makes a lot of sense." The emperor touched his chin and pondered, with a little interest in his eyes, "Guess what kind of women the national teacher likes?"
"The emperor grew up with the national teacher, and he should know him better than me."
"But I've never seen him look at any woman differently, not even a concubine."
"This shows at least two problems." Nie Bufan stretched out two fingers and said, "One is that he has some problems; the other is that he likes men."
The emperor stared at Nie Bufan, uncertain: "Do you like men?"
Nie Bufan nodded.
The emperor fell silent again.
Nie Bufan was surprised, why didn't he consider the possibility of impotence
The emperor suddenly said: "For so many years, he has never been in contact with any woman, maybe he really likes men. As a result, he probably has no experience in this area, and I really need to help him."
"What is the emperor going to do?"
"Give him a map of man's acacia."
"Good idea!" Nie Bufan extended his thumb and praised.
"However," the emperor said in a strange tone, "the palace and the people will not openly collect such books, and they must be redrawn."
"Redraw?" Nie Bufan asked, "Does it take a lot of time?"
"No, find a painter to observe the painting on the spot. At the level of a court painter, it's just a matter of day and night."
Nie Bufan gave another thumbs up in his heart, this emperor brother was unexpectedly fierce! Completely subverted his previous wise impression of him.
What made him even more stunned was still behind, the emperor continued: "Before this, I decided to experience it myself. After all, I have no such experience, I don't know what it is like. If there is no joy, then don't bother to help What kind of acacia map did the national teacher draw?"
"Huh? Experience it yourself?" Nie Bufan widened his eyes.
The emperor looked at him with burning eyes.
Nie Bufan took a few steps back and pretended to be calm: "Your Majesty, do you need Xiaobao to help you summon someone?"
"Come here." The emperor patted the couch beside him and said in a leisurely manner.
"No." Nie Bufan continued to retreat. Do what you say, do you want to act like the wind
"Come here, don't let me say it a third time." The emperor said threateningly.
Nie Bufan quickly ran back to the small room behind the screen. Just as he was about to lock it, he was knocked back a few steps by a strong force, and then his eyes went black and he was heavily pressed against the wall.
"In my bedroom, no one can disobey my orders."
"Your Majesty, it's not right for Zhanyi to be lewd." Nie Bufan tried his best to preach.
"Really?" The emperor tossed his hair away, picked up a strand of his hair, sniffed it, and said in a low voice, "Who was reading obscene words to me just now?"
Who knows what you say, do you have any dignified and reserved for the king!
"Fighting against the gums, the two bodies are combined in one dark grinding." The emperor smiled, "What is 'two bodies in one', teach me how?"
"The emperor is a genius, where do you need someone to teach you?" Nie Bufan rubbed along the wall, like a crab.
"Well said, then I'll see if I can learn without a teacher?" The emperor restrained his movements, picked up his belt, and ran his fingers across his neck.
Nie Bufan shivered and struggled: "Your Majesty, let's discuss, let Xiaobao go today, and tomorrow I will definitely write a few good poems for you to serve the country... Ah!"
The emperor's leg hooked, Nie Bufan fell to his back, and then was crushed firmly.
"I have a lot of loyal ministers, and I don't need you to add color." The emperor ripped open his shirt, revealing snow white.
He touched it with his hand, nodded and said, "It's not as soft as a woman, it's smooth and firm, like fine porcelain."
Continue down: "The waistline is very beautiful, although it is a little thinner, but the buttocks feel very good."
Nie Bufan turned around, like a kitten being teased by its owner, trying to get out of the gap when he saw it, but every time he was caught.
The emperor was only a little bit interested, but being pulled by him like this, he couldn't help but feel lustful.
He lowered his head and sniffed on Nie Bufan's body. It was different from the powdery fragrance on a woman's body. It had the brightness of sunlight and the freshness of grass and trees. When you smell it for the first time, it is impressive.
His fingers ran down the line of his buttocks, digging into the secret place, immediately feeling tight and hot, as if he could inhale it.
Nie Bufan stepped back, squeezed his fingers out, did not dare to turn around, stepped directly on his chest, and retreated with strength.
The emperor grabbed his legs, brought him over with force, spread his legs, and pushed him closer again.
Nie Bufan didn't know that the emperor of the Yu Kingdom was known as the "Merry Emperor", and he was equally well-known for his rambunctiousness and ability to rule the country. As long as it is a beautiful woman he likes, he will find a way to get it in his pocket. The only fortunate thing is that he never starts with married women. Playing in the harem without any form, but being cautious outside the ceremony, barely considered absurd. Because of this, he was not impeached too strongly by the minister.
Nie Bufan is also self-inflicted. When he was lonely in the middle of the night, he read lewd poems to this romantic emperor and read the pictures of the erotic palace. When the unscrupulous emperor met the unscrupulous village chief, it was really a thunderous fire, and it was out of control.
Of course, Nie Bufan acted without restraint, but he was far from the emperor's opponent when it came to intercourse. After several provocations, he was already paralyzed, and his consciousness was blurred.
The emperor slammed in, the feeling of complete engulfment intoxicated him, reaching the top every time, it was ecstasy. He is naturally gifted, and that thing is much better than the average person. Few women satisfy him, but this time, he experienced the best of joy in a man.
Thinking about it this way, he was even more excited and spared no effort to toss.
In the narrow room, the two bodies tangled and rolled, panting. The table was overturned, the clothes were messed up, and the battle was fierce.
Outside the door, the eunuch listened to the corner without changing his face, while dutifully recording...