A few days later, Zhou Chengyan was ordered by his parents to kiss Jin's house and propose to break off the marriage.
Mrs. Zhou informed her husband about Jin Yi's troubles at Zhou's house. Master Zhou was angry and then sighed, not only complaining that Jin Yi was too talented, but also regretting that he should not be so indulgent and accommodating to the little girl. But this is the end of the matter, and it is the best policy to stop the loss in time. When the Jin government announces the divorce, what will be the face of the Zhou family? Before the Jin Mansion had any actual action, Master Zhou asked Zhou Chengyan to go to Jin Mansion on his behalf, and proposed to break off the marriage. The reason was that Zhou Yuqing was seriously ill, and he invited an eminent monk to recite the scriptures. The eminent monk said that this woman should not be married in the past two years. In order not to delay Jin Yi, the Zhou family is willing to take the initiative to break off the marriage.
It was true that Zhou Yuqing was seriously ill, but the so-called eminent monk's words were false. Zhou Chengyan didn't know why his parents did this. He even secretly asked his sister who was sick in bed. To his surprise, Zhou Yuqing himself agreed to break off the marriage.
He persuaded everyone, "It's not that far yet. My sister's condition has never been so serious. What's more, my brother-in-law is not such a selfish person. Even if it takes a year or two, he is willing to come."
Master Zhou knew that he and Fu Ming had a strong friendship and could not be honest with him about what he and his wife and daughter had done, so he had to put pressure on his father's order. Zhou Chengyan was helpless and finally had to go to Jin Mansion.
When he saw Jin Yi again, Zhou Chengyan sighed inwardly, but after Yueyu disappeared, his brother-in-law had lost a lot of weight. Although it seemed that the mighty power still existed, he couldn't hide his despondency.
As soon as they met, Zhou Chengyan felt that he seemed to understand his mood, and he asked, "Brother-in-law, you too... You know that too?" As he spoke, his eyes were red again.
Jin Yiyi asked, "You already know?"
Zhou Chengyan nodded, "Brother Ming left me a letter." That day, when he went to the suburbs of Beijing again, he wanted to see if Fu Ming was getting better, but what he saw was... He was in grief for a long time, and he was cautious with a few friends who knew about it. After worshipping Fu Ming, his mood gradually eased. But it turned out that it was only temporarily subsided. As long as the memory was awakened again, he was still very sad.
Maybe it was because Fu Ming had a good relationship with Zhou Chengyan before his death, or maybe it was just in case that Zhou Chengyan could still understand his mood, Jin Yi's attitude towards Zhou Chengyan was much more peaceful than the rest of the Zhou family.
Zhou Chengyan comforted Jin Yi with a few words and explained his intention to come back, and Jin Yi agreed without hesitation.
Zhou Chengyan was surprised: "Brother-in-law, don't you think about it anymore?"
"Why do you want me to think about it when you come to break off the marriage? Even if you want to think about it, I have already thought about it clearly, so there is no need to think about it anymore."
Zhou Chengyan persuaded again: "Brother-in-law, I know that although you and Brother Ming are divorced, there is still kindness. Now Brother Ming... He is gone, you feel uncomfortable, but after all, the deceased is gone, you can't be impulsive because of this. I'll give up my other marriage next time!"
Jin Yi shook his head and said, "You don't have to persuade me any more. The marriage between me and your sister will be voided. If you want to know the real reason, you can ask Mrs. Zhou, Mrs. Zhou."
"The real reason? Master Zhou, Madam Zhou? Brother-in-law, what are you talking about?"
"That's all I have to say, what you hear is the truth."
"Brother-in-law... Although I may not know why things are like this, do you really stop thinking about it? Although you always say things as soon as you say them, marriage is a big event after all. If Brother Ming knows, he doesn't want you to do this. Lonely. He still said in the letter he left me..."
"What did he say?" This is the most emotional sentence Zhou Chengyan has heard from Jin Yi today. He recalled and replied:
"He said, I hope I can take care of you and Yan'er more on the basis of my affection with him and with Jin's house. That's the general idea."
Jin Yi smiled and burst into tears, "Thank you for your kindness, but no need, I will take care of Yaner. You don't have to worry about my affairs anymore, I have made up my mind that I will never marry again in this life."
"Brother-in-law..." Zhou Chengyan was shocked and speechless. He knew that Jin Yi was not the kind of person who would say that "the sea was difficult for the water", but he said that if he didn't want to marry again, he was determined to die alone.
After a long time, Zhou Chengyan smiled sadly, "He is like this, and so are you. Even if he has left the Jin residence, even if he is about to die, he still misses you in his heart. And you, for him, have decided the rest of his life... I only hate the sky. There are no eyes, the sky has no eyes..." Zhou Chengyan said, but he burst into tears.
The news that the Jin family and the Zhou family broke off their marriage gradually spread throughout the capital. Each family heard that Miss Zhou was seriously ill. The Zhou family took the initiative to call off the marriage. Years can't wait, in the end it's a bit ruthless.
Jin Yi ignored the rumors from outsiders. After returning from the yamen every day, he just served the elders and accompanied Zhaoyan, and spent the rest of the time in Fangmanting.
He moved his residence to Fangmanting, and none of the original furnishings were changed, which was the same as before Fu Ming left.
Some of the flowers and trees in the courtyard were planted by Fu Ming in the past, so he no longer fakes the hand of others, and must take care of it himself. When birds came to drink and feed, he thought, maybe they were fed by Fu Ming, so he had to talk to them. It seemed that only their "old friends" could understand what he was saying.
Except for Bai Lu and other big maids, the little maids who used to be in his room have all been sent to serve other masters, and Fang Manting's little maids who originally followed Fu Ming are still able to stay. Jin Yi is sometimes admitted to the hospital, and when he sees them, he seems to have walked into the former Fang Man Court. It's just that the person he most wants to see will no longer stand under the tree, by the pool, under the porch or in front of the window, waiting for him to approach.
At night, he often had dreams, dreaming that Fu Ming was ill, looking at himself with deep-set eyes, and said weakly, "Changbor, I'm in pain, hold me." He sympathetically embraced the man in his arms. , and found that he was so thin that the thin bones hurt his chest. Sometimes I dreamed that he went to the deep mountain without looking back. I was busy running up to grab him, but I couldn't catch up, and I watched him disappear into the mist. Occasionally, he would ask for a famous doctor for Fu Ming in his dreams. If he was lucky, it was a beautiful dream. He would be able to find a famous doctor who could rejuvenate him. The doctor said that he would definitely be able to cure Fu Ming. Laughing relatively, he was so happy that he couldn't bear it, and wept with joy...
Night after night, but dreams are just dreams, bad dreams do not reappear in reality, and sweet dreams do not come true. Only memories can make him confirm to himself that he really once had such a person. One often reads a book in the warm sun. After hearing the sound, he raised his head and smiled at him, and said to him, "Come back." ”, and he approached eagerly, like a breeze blowing from his face, the unparalleled person in the world.
From summer to autumn, the smoky wind turned into a cool breeze, the wind blew the trees, and the shadows of the branches danced in front of the window. He woke up from his light sleep, thinking that Fu Ming was calling him in a low voice and waving to him. He hurriedly lifted the quilt and got up, pushed the window to look, but only Leng Yueqing splendidly filled the courtyard, no one was seen, never to meet again... He wanted to fall asleep again, but couldn't fall asleep again, after tossing and turning, he simply got up, Light the candle and read the poems and books that Fu Ming had read in the dim light. If he came across a place where he had annotated, he would read it again and again until he could memorize it in his heart.
He thought, before they could communicate with each other, how could Fu Ming be alone in this courtyard, facing the spring flowers and autumn moon alone, day after day enduring the coldness of human affection without saying a word
He saw that one in a collection of poems copied by Fu Ming, and there was a sentence that Fu Ming had read to him: Swallow and fish can be thick together, and mud and moss have their own reasons. What did Fu Ming say then? By the way, he said that this was what his father had taught him long ago. Where fate makes you go is often out of your control, but people can settle themselves. He also asked himself: Grandpa has broad shoulders and broad chest, can you allow me to settle down in this life? He promised, so unequivocally. In the end it was all empty. Next to this poem, Fu Ming has a side comment: This flower has an owner and can live together for the rest of his life.
Jin Yi lost his mind with the book in his hands, and recalled these sentences and batches all night, as if he had been delayed thousands of times, and it was painful to the bottom of his heart, but he still thought about it and was willing to suffer from this pain.
The rest of his life is long, if he can repay this, will he be able to make himself feel more at ease when he sees Fu Mingshi again in a hundred years? At this point, he finally understood what Fu Ming said about the Buddha's compassion and wisdom, which can overcome the suffering of people's hearts. He once did not believe in it, but now he wants to believe in the reincarnation of the human world that the Buddha said. He is willing to ask for each other sincerely, not for the other side, but only for the next life. Or, with the pains suffered in this life, to seek a good beginning and a good end in the next life.
On a rest day, if there is nothing important, Jin Yi will go to the suburbs of Beijing.
The roses in the corners are gone, and the tung leaves are also scattered. Jin So has transplanted a few autumn chrysanthemums. This is the variety that Fu Ming said last year to be planted.
Over the past few days, although he regretted that the most important person had been lost forever, he gradually realized that he seemed to understand Fu Ming better. He himself once regarded himself as the queen of the gate, and believed that when a man was alive, he wanted to serve the Mingjun, protect the family and defend the country, make great achievements, and leave an immortal reputation. This is the value of his life as a human being. But Fu Ming married him, and as a scholar, his career was cut off and his future was lost. But when he followed Fu Ming's footsteps, caught a glimpse of what he had experienced, and thought about what he thought, he realized that Fu Ming still had a passion no less than his own. Fu Ming once said that to write down their hard work and fireworks life for those who are not recorded in the history books, he has been fulfilling this promise. He was reading and making notes, and there were so many inspirations and surging emotions in it. He was such a deeply affectionate and sensitive person, but he was the only one who could silently endure all kinds of fate imposed on him without resentment, repaying kindness with kindness and virtue. He always holds his gentle and honest heart, and is kind to others... He grows flowers and fishes, Jin Yi once thought it was just his leisure, but in his essays he read that he gave flowers and fishes to fish, he knew How does he treat these inhuman things...
Before he was alive, he never got to know him well. After his death, he finally understood him through the various things he left behind, and he was even more unwilling. He loved the world so much, but the world abandoned him like a mustard .
Jin Yi wanted to go to Fang's tomb to comfort Fu Ming, but also to comfort himself, telling him that he would remember this deep affection for him forever.
Along the grass-colored yellow-green mottled winding path, Jin Yi entered the mountain pass. But stopped far away.
In front of Fu Ming's tomb, he saw five or six people including Zhou Chengyan and Yan Le sitting on the grass, playing the qin, cooking tea and singing. It seems that this is not a deserted suburb, but an elegant place. Fu Ming is also among them, knowing each other and having fun together.
Seeing this scene, Jin Yi was in a complicated mood. He wanted to drive them all away, but he was the only one here, to accompany Fu Ming for a long time, and there were only two of them between heaven and earth, who accompany each other. But he was happy for Fu Ming, at least besides himself, there were people who remembered him, missed him, and made him feel alive.
In the end, Jin Yi neither spoke nor stepped forward, but quietly stood for a long time and then quietly left.