It hurts more than when a bullet entered my body on the battlefield, it hurt more than bones breaking, and it hurt more than a dagger piercing my flesh.
It hurt more than all the pain he had ever endured combined.
In this life, Jian Zechuan has never been in such pain.
Jian Zechuan has never been a person who is afraid of pain. When he was injured in the past, he did not say a word when removing the bullet without anesthesia. He felt that it did not matter...
But this time, he felt like he couldn't bear it anymore. He might really be hurt to death.
The pain made Jian Zechuan dizzy and made him... almost want to faint from the pain at that moment.
The pain was not momentary, it was always there, and it was getting more and more painful.
The blood on Jian Zechuan's face gradually faded away from the pain, and his whole body was shaking from the pain. He seemed to feel it. He felt that someone was holding a knife and cutting open his heart, hiding it in the deepest part. His feelings for Xin Ai were dug out!
Yes, he liked Xin Ai, he fell in love with the woman who had been lying to him. Before he knew it, she had gotten into his heart. She had always been very defensive in his heart and would not allow anyone else to get rid of him. Wherever anyone from outside enters, they take root and grow little by little.
When Jian Zechuan discovered it today, it was already a towering tree. He stood under the tree and looked up, but he could no longer see where the top of the tree was.
That feeling is actually not difficult to find, but he is too stupid, too proud, and too conceited.
He thought that he had seen through everything, thought that nothing could be hidden from him, thought that he seemed to understand what love was about, but when his love came, he was at a loss.
Unfortunately, he discovered it too late and understood it too late.
And, I figured it out when I least should have.
He was unwilling to admit this bloody fact, so when Xu Chaomu told the news of Xin Ai's death, Jian Zechuan was afraid, and his brain could not resist the news that would bring him great harm... so he chose to escape.
Because he had refused to bow his head, and the result of his pride was that heaven and man were separated forever.
He always thought that he had really forgotten Xin Ai if he didn't think about her this year.
In fact, he was just using deliberate forgetfulness as an excuse to escape, and that deliberateness was all an illusion.
After all, he is the most cowardly person in relationships, because he never dares to admit that he likes Xin Ai.
Xie Chenzhou said that if you meet the right person, get married because you don’t know if you will meet the next one if you miss it.
And the right person is the person he likes.
Xie Chenzhou is right. If you miss the person you like, you will really... never have another chance.
In this life, people will not always be so good.
Good luck, after missing one, I can prepare a second one for you right away...
Xin Ai said before, Third Master, you are my life. Without you, I would really be dead.
As a result, she was really... gone!
If he could have cared about her just a little bit, if he could have lowered his head slightly, if he could... have known earlier that this would be the result. At that time, he would never let go of Xin Ai's hand no matter what.
But now... it's really too late!
Jian Zechuan slowly sat up, and Mrs. Jian shouted: "Zechuan... Zechuan..."
"You guys go first..."
Jian Zechuan's voice was hoarse, and it seemed like his soul was taken away in a matter of seconds.
After he finished speaking, he got up and went upstairs. No one had lived there for a year. There was a thin layer of dust on the stairs. After he walked through, he left a series of footprints.
He and Xin Ai had walked up the stairs countless times before. Jian Zechuan felt that every step was so difficult, and all the strength in his body was almost exhausted...
"Zechuan, listen to your mother. Now that things are like this, you must face it bravely. Life will continue to go on... Zechuan..."
Mrs. Jian called Jian Zechuan's name, but he did not look back or stop.
Jian Zechuan pushed open the bedroom door, went in, and started interfering from the inside.
Mrs. Jian chased her to the bedroom door and tried to push it open. She slapped the door and shouted: "Zechuan, Zechuan... come out quickly."
, did mom say something wrong just now... Mom apologizes to you... Don't shut yourself in, mom is very worried about you... "
However, there was not a single sound inside.
Mrs. Jian burst into anxious tears. She slapped the door hard with both hands, her palms turning red: "Zechuan, open the door quickly. Don't scare mom..."
For so many years, ever since she was a child, Mrs. Jian has never seen Jian Zechuan like this. He is lost and walking like a zombie. It seems that the moment he accepted Xin Ai's death, his soul was also taken away.
In Jian Zechuan's eyes, his son is always confident no matter what he faces. No matter what difficulties he encounters, he will never be overwhelmed. His face will never show a worried look. He will always have that expression of "I can control everything." His coldness is what others call the flower of the high mountains, and he is not stained by the mortal world.
But now, the son who was arrogant and confident, and who was always calm and collected, actually locked himself in a small room.
Mrs. Jane thought of the beast healing alone.
If Xin Ai died, she knew it would have an impact on her son, but she didn't expect it would be so big.
Mrs. Jian used to say that her son was too scumbag, but now, she really would rather it would be better if Jian Zechuan was really a scumbag.
If he were a scumbag, he wouldn't be so sad.
Mrs. Jian's face was filled with tears, and she said to Jian Si in a panic
: "What should I do? Zechuan won't come out. You guys, Jian Si... hurry up, think of a way to open the door. I'm worried that Zechuan... he will be confused..."
Jian Si shook his head decisively: "No, madam, the third master would never do such a thing..."
He believed that the third master he had been following would never commit suicide.
Third Master, he just... needs time to accept this.
Jian Si sighed and said: "Madam, Third Master, he... blames himself too much. He didn't know about this until a year after Miss Xin passed away. He... knew it was too late... He could have had many opportunities..."
Yeah, it's too late.
Jian Zechuan was lying on the bed where he and Xin Ai had lay, thinking the same thing.
Too late!
I didn't see my heart clearly early, I didn't protect her, I didn't rush to save her, I didn't rush to help her deal with her funeral...
Originally he could protect her, originally he could save her...
But he didn't, he completely missed her step by step until he could no longer recover.
The later he found out, the deeper the guilt and self-blame in Jian Zechuan's heart became. It became the sin he carried, and it was his eternal... unforgivable!
Even if Xin Ai comes back to life one day and says he forgives him, Jian Zechuan himself will not be able to forgive himself.
This was a wound that would never heal in his heart.
From now on, whenever I look at it, it will always be a blur of flesh and blood.
(End of this chapter)(End of this chapter)