Duan Chengzhang looked a little depressed, and also slightly embarrassed, but Duan Xu looked at him with such frankness and sincerity. He thought that the child was still young after all, and it was normal for him to be curious without having experienced the world, so he sighed and said, "Those things happened too many years ago, and I can't remember them clearly anymore."
There was only a vague beautiful outline in his mind. He inserted a peach blossom in the girl's hair. He couldn't remember clearly what she said or how she smiled.
"After she left, were you sad? Did you miss her often?"
"When you are young, you are simple-minded. You may feel sad sometimes, but you will let it go after a long time. There are many things in life that are more important than love. No one can't live without the other, and no one is indispensable to the other. You will understand these things in the future." Duan Chengzhang was silent for a moment, and asked, "Do you have a girl you like?"
"Yeah." Duan Xu lowered his eyes.
"A civilian?"
"Yes."
"You can take her as a concubine in the future."
Duan Xu suddenly laughed, and shook his head, saying, "Then why didn't the girl you liked, father, become my aunt?"
There are always people who refuse to compromise, and if you really like someone, how could you let her compromise
Duan Xu did not continue the topic and brought it back to politics. After Duan Chengzhang explained, he seemed to remember something and frowned, saying, "There are countless eyes watching you when you return to the capital this time. Remember to be careful with your words and actions, especially when facing Fang Xianye... That guy is now the leader of the literary world in Southern Capital. The censors in the Censorate who don't obey anyone are very fond of his articles and poems. You must be careful to avoid his edge."
Duan Xu nodded. He observed Duan Chengzhang's expression and asked, "Father, does Fang Xianye have any grudge against our family?"
Duan Chengzhang lowered his gaze and said, "Just listen to me, don't ask too many questions."
Duan Xu also obediently stopped asking questions. After the two chatted briefly for a few sentences, Duan Chengzhang asked him to go to rest. Duan Xu left the study and saw Duan Jingyuan standing by the door as soon as he opened the door. He closed the door, crossed his arms and smiled, "Are you eavesdropping on my conversation with my father again?"
Duan Jingyuan looked around the room, then pulled Duan Xu aside by his sleeve and asked, "Is Fang Xianye the guy who reported you and sent you to the border camp? He always seems to be against you. Does he really have a grudge against our family?"
Duan Xu was silent for a moment, then said lightly, "Isn't it normal to have hatred? Nowadays, who doesn't have hatred against each other? There is even hatred between you and me."
Duan Jingyuan opened his eyes wide and asked in surprise: "What kind of hatred is there between us?"
"When we were little, you stole sweet-scented osmanthus cake and blamed it on me. And you always complained that I was not as good as when I was in Daizhou."
Duan Jingyuan was speechless for a moment. She said angrily, "You are too vindictive, aren't you? That was a long time ago."
"You also know that you only went back to Daizhou for three months when you were eight years old. How come you still talk about it today?" Duan Xu quickly counterattacked.
Duan Jingyuan snorted and said, "Who would have known that the gentle and refined Third Brother back then would grow up to be such a sharp-tongued person now. I have to say it, and I have to say it a hundred times, Third Brother, you have really grown crooked!"
Duan Xu smiled but said nothing.
I don't know if it's because he and Duan Jingyuan are the only brothers and sisters left in this generation, but Jingyuan is very close to him. Duan Xu was still young when she left Nandu, and she didn't have any impression of him. Later, she went to Daizhou to visit her grandmother, and when she came back, she kept talking about her third brother, saying that her third brother was the best boy in the world, and that she would marry someone like her third brother in the future.
After Duan Xu returned to Nandu, he took great pains to break her beautiful fantasy, and changed her muttering from "I want to marry someone like Third Brother" to "Third Brother is a big liar." Although she quarreled with him every day, she was very protective of him outside and would not tolerate anyone saying anything bad about him.
Duan Jingyuan looked at the scroll in Duan Xu's hand and said, "Third brother, are you really going to get married?"
Duan Xu's eyes also fell on the scroll and said, "Maybe."
"That's right, you listen to dad the most. Dad asked you to take the imperial examination, so you took it. Dad arranged for you to be a secretary, so you went. Now he asked you to resign from the army and come back, and you agreed. As for marriage... you won't just let dad choose whoever he wants, right? This is a life-long event!" Duan Jingyuan naggingly said, her eyes drifting to a wooden roof in the distance, and said: "This matter should be your mother's help, but..."
It has been several hours since Duan Xu returned home, and my mother has not shown up yet. Duan Jingyuan realized that he had said something wrong, and hurriedly explained: "My mother is used to being a vegetarian, and she can't stand the smell of meat, so she didn't come to eat with us. She originally said that you would arrive in the afternoon, and she has been chanting sutras behind closed doors this morning, and doesn't want to be disturbed..."
Duan Xu's expression remained unchanged. He said in a relaxed tone, "Jingyuan, what are you afraid of?"
Duan Jingyuan thought to himself, what am I afraid of? It’s because you and mom have never been close, and I’m afraid there will be some rift between you two.
Duan Xu seemed to see her worry and said calmly, "I'm just about to go to the temple to visit my mother. Don't worry."
He handed the scroll to Duan Jingyuan and asked her to help him take a look first. Then he called Chen Ying and asked him to accompany him to the Buddhist temple in the backyard to see his mother.
He had just introduced his sworn brother to his family and explained that Chen Ying would live in the mansion in the future. Because he didn't like to have people follow him before, and he didn't have a personal attendant around him, his family was a little surprised to hear him say that he would bring Chen Ying with him.
The eldest sister-in-law was the happiest. She said that the family was not large and Yiqi was lonely studying alone, so Chen Ying came to be a good companion. Yiqi said that since his uncle accepted Chen Ying as his brother, he should also call Chen Ying uncle. But Chen Ying was a few years younger than Duan Yiqi, so Duan Yiqi naturally refused. After a long argument, he finally agreed that he could call Chen Ying by his name.
Duan Jingyuan looked at Shen Ying for a long time, and then said to his third brother bluntly: "Third brother, your brother is a little rustic."
After a pause, she confidently said, "Leave him to me to train. Within a year, I will make him a noble young master in Nandu."
Duan Xu waved his hand and said, "He will have to go to the battlefield with me in the future, so don't make him look like those playboys in Nandu."
This statement successfully earned a roll of the eyes from Duan Jingyuan.
Perhaps it was his words "going to the battlefield" that caught his father's attention, and his father talked to him urgently, asking him to give up the idea of going to the battlefield.
Chen Ying's voice brought back Duan Xu's memories. He looked up and saw Chen Ying trotting in front of him, looking up and asking excitedly, "Third brother, you called me."
Now he was becoming more and more proficient in calling her "third brother", just like when he first called her "little sister" every day.
Duan Xu smiled faintly, touched Chen Ying's head, and said, "Come with me to visit my mother later. She likes quietness, so you just don't talk too much."
Shen Ying nodded like pounding garlic.
He then led Chen Ying through the long corridor in the courtyard and came to a Buddhist temple with a pond of white lotus. The sound of chanting could be heard faintly in the temple. Duan Xu took a deep breath, walked to the temple and pushed open the door. The woman inside turned around and said unhappily, "Who is it..."
Seeing that it was him, the woman was startled, then stood up from the mat and said, "Xu'er."
The woman was in her forties, with gray hair on her temples and eyes. She wore a simple blue dress and an ebony hairpin, but even such a simple outfit could not conceal her beautiful face and her elegant and noble temperament.
This is the daughter of the Grand Princess, the cousin of the current emperor, the princess of Xihe, a noble and beautiful woman from Daliang. She is also his father's wife and his mother.
Duan Xu smiled brightly, like a child returning home from a long journey, and called out affectionately, "Mom, I'm back. I heard that you had to finish reciting this sutra before you came out, and no one dared to disturb you. I missed you so much that I came to see you."
The woman seemed a little uncomfortable. She whispered, "I heard that you didn't arrive until this afternoon at the earliest, so I... please take a seat."
Duan Xu agreed and walked to the chair next to him and sat down. His mother also left the cushion, incense burner and Buddha statue and sat next to Duan Xu across a table.
Her eyes fell on Chen Ying, and Duan Xu said to her mother, "This is my adopted brother Xue Chen Ying, whom I adopted on the battlefield. His parents died early, and his sister made great contributions on the battlefield. I was entrusted by his sister to take care of him. Chen Ying, come and meet your mother."
Shen Ying came over in a proper manner, knelt on the ground and kowtowed, saying, "Greetings, Madam Duan."
Mrs. Duan immediately leaned over to support him, and said in a pleasant manner: "There is no need for such a great ceremony. It is fate that you came to the Duan family. Buddha has mercy on me. From now on, this will be your home."
Chen Ying's eyes were a little wet, he agreed sullenly and stood up, thinking that Mrs. Duan was really gentle and kind, a rare good person. Mrs. Duan wiped Chen Ying's eyes with a handkerchief, turned to look at Duan Xu, and found that Duan Xu's eyes had just moved back from her hand that was wiping Chen Ying's tears, and smiled again when he looked at her.
Madam Duan looked at Duan Xu carefully and asked, "Have you been injured on the battlefield these days?"
"I had some minor injuries, probably because my mother chanted sutras and prayed for blessings every day, so I was able to escape safely and turn danger into safety."
Mrs. Duan nodded, her hand still holding Chen Ying's, caressing unconsciously, as if she needed this strange child to help relieve the tension in her heart. The sun silently fell on the table between them through the window, and the incense offerings emitted curling white smoke. It was very quiet for a while.
Duan Xu was silent for a moment, then he laughed out loud. He said innocently, "Why is mother so reserved every time she sees me? Jing Yuan also... She must be suspicious that there is a rift between us."
Madam Duan was stunned for a moment. She lowered her eyes in a panic, then raised them again, and said hesitantly, "I just feel guilty for not being able to do anything for you all these years. After all... I wasn't by your side when you needed me the most."
She was hinting at something, as if she was talking about the missing seven years.
"Mother, you are overthinking. I have never felt any resentment towards you in this matter."
"It is because you have no grudge against me that I feel even worse and ashamed to face you." Mrs. Duan sighed. She thought for a while and said, "I will go to Jin'an Temple outside the city to pray for blessings in a few days. Do you want to go with me?"
Duan Xu said casually: "Mother knows that I don't like these places. Since I am not sincere, I'd better not step into the Buddhist Pure Land. Let Jingyuan accompany you as usual. You also like her to be by your side, don't you?"
Although her proposal was rejected by Duan Xu, Madam Duan seemed relieved. She made small talk: "Jingyuan is so lively, but he can calm down and worship Buddha. Maybe he really has a connection with Buddha."
Duan Xu couldn't help but chuckle a few times, and Mrs. Duan looked puzzled. He explained: "My little sister is not destined to be with the Buddha. She just likes you too much and wants your attention and company. You have been staying in the Buddhist temple, and she has been running to the temple to stay with you. It took a lot of effort to get close to you over the years."
Mrs. Duan was a little embarrassed, and Duan Xu continued, as if jokingly saying, "I was so awkward when I was a child, and I never went to the temple. I always thought that maybe one day you would come out of the temple and come to my side. But I left before you came."
"Xu'er... I... I just..."
"My mother prayed to the Buddha for the well-being of the whole family. I didn't understand when I was young, but now I understand."
Duan Xu didn't wait for Mrs. Duan to explain, but had already thought of an excuse for her. Mrs. Duan was stunned, and clenched the Buddhist beads in her hand, her expression became even more gloomy.
Duan Xu led Chen Ying out of the Buddhist temple and stopped after turning a corner. Chen Ying held his hand and looked at him with some worry. His brother Duan Xu still looked tired after recovering from a serious illness. He looked calm and indifferent, wearing dark blue clothes. He looked calm and unpredictable.
Duan Xu suddenly turned around, pinched his face, and said with a smile: "When I was a child, I really hoped that she could wipe my tears like she wiped your tears just now. But when I think about it carefully, I have never cried in front of her. Thinking about it carefully again, looking back through my past lives, I don't know when I needed them the most since I can remember."
Chen Ying was a little confused. He shook Duan Xu's hand and said, "Are they not nice to you? Do you hate them?"
Duan Xu shook his head, he looked down at Chen Ying and said: "I don't hate them, in fact I understand them very well, maybe I still love them."
But today, we no longer need them and we won’t rely on them anymore.