At the age of eight—
The door of the house opened.
"Good morning, Doctor Xie. Dad asked me to come and say hello to you. He wants me to chat more with you."
He pretended to be well-behaved, but he was also genuinely ignorant, so he stood at the door of the guest room engraved with endless summer patterns and bowed to the young medical student sitting at the desk.
The doctor turned around and looked at him lightly: "Come in and sit."
Then, at the age of ten—
He ran down the long corridor with a special test sheet in his hand.
"Thank you doctor, thank you doctor."
The door opened again, pushed open by the boy.
Xie Qingcheng stood by the window lattice, reading a copy of "Ode to a Nightingale", the boy's commotion made him frown. How many times did you say it?"
"My indicators are almost normal this time! I'm feeling better!" He couldn't help being excited, with fine sweat running out of his face, "Look, doctor, look."
"If you're so emotional, it's time to get worse."
Xie Qingcheng closed the collection of poems, with a dull expression on his face, but he still beckoned to him at will: "Come in. Show me."
And then, at the age of fourteen—
It was gloomy outside, he stood in front of the heavy door for a long time, and then he knocked on the door.
The door of the house opened again.
At a glance, the teenager found that the room had become very cold, and Xie Qingcheng's luggage had already been packed.
The answer is that everything is clear.
But he was still like a dying patient wanting to be alive, and he asked him unwillingly, "Is what my mother said true?"
"… "
Empty wardrobes, clean tabletops, suitcases in the corner, all the still lifes answered him silently.
But he only looked at Xie Qingcheng, stubborn, strong, full of self-esteem, but extremely humble and asked again: "Is what she said true?"
Xie Qingcheng put an ironed coat on his hand, he sighed and said, "You come in first. Come in and talk about it."
Finally, at the age of fourteen—
Soon after Xie Qingcheng left, He Yu was going abroad too. Before leaving, he came to the door of the closed guest room alone. The boy's hair was a little messy at the time, and it covered his eyes finely.
He stood silently for a long time with his head lowered like this, and finally he raised his hand and knocked on Xie Qingcheng's door.
again and again.
With a creak, the door opened.
He Yu's heart lifted, and he looked in expectantly, but there was nothing inside - it was the wind that opened the door.
The guest room was very dark, and it looked like an empty tomb, like a cooling fantasy.
When he walked in, the only thing that could prove that Xie Qing had presented it was the book about rare diseases in the world that he finally left to He Yu. The book was placed on the table by the window. With Xie Qing's light blue pen handwriting, his muscles and bones are straight, and the tall and straight person can be seen through the words.
Congratulations to:
Little devil, one day, you will come out of your inner shadow by yourself.
I hope, I can believe so.
Xie Qingcheng
gift
The young man raised his hand and touched the stern character, trying to absorb some remaining tenderness from it, which might make him separate from him and forget him from now on.
However, He Yu never admitted that, in many subsequent dreams, on the banks of the Thames, on the beach in Sicily, in the cold and foggy polar night in Denmark, and in the splendid and warm Spanish summer.
He dreamed of returning to the old villa in Huzhou from his pillow, dreaming of the long corridor covered with thick carpets.
I dreamed of the wooden door carved with endless summer dark patterns.
Then he dreamed that he knocked on the door, again and again, helpless, desperate again and again-until the clock struck twelve, and in the dream he used to save himself, he dreamed that the heavy door would again Once opened from the inside.
Xie Qingcheng stood in the guest room, looking indifferent like He Yu needed him any time when he was a child, but he was so reliable, like the best big brother in the world, the strongest man, the most attachment, and couldn't be separated from him. 's doctor—
The man looked at him from top to bottom, as if nothing had happened in between.
He only slightly tilted his head, and said the same as before, "It's you, kid."
"Then, come in and sit."
—
"Come in and sit."
"Little devil..."
But everything has changed recently. Recently, even in a late night dream, when He Yu opened the door, there was no one in the door.
He would never go back to the hallway before the age of fourteen, and could not open the door full of light.
My heart suddenly hurts so badly...
As a result, He Yu woke up abruptly—
When he woke up, he found himself lying on the bed in the bedroom.
Gauze was wrapped around his forehead, as were his wrists and ankles.
The curtains were drawn in the bedroom, and the AI speaker was playing the news one after another.
"The Shanghai University video serial murder case that shocked the whole country... The police revealed... This was a revenge murder. The police found evidence of her purchase of hacking equipment in Lu Yuzhu's belongings. Lu Yuzhu is one of the suspects in this case. She was a former Qingli The secretary of the county party committee was the first local girl to be admitted to a university. Lu Yuzhu’s major was computer information security, and the police suspected…”
Because the bluetooth signal is weak, the sound is intermittent.
"Another suspect, Jiang Liping, is currently at large... Both of them have an improper relationship with the victim... Maybe... Cheng Kang is mentally ill... The two of them were inspired by Jiang Lanpei's murder and wanted to create something similar to the rumored 'Jiang Lanpei' The terrifying atmosphere of "Desperate Ghosts"... But it does not rule out that the two of them knew that the Jiang Lanpei incident had a deeper connection with it..."
The speaker tells about Jiang Liping's escape.
He Yu lay on the bed, his heartbeat slowly calmed down.
The door in the dream disappeared.
He remembered how he accidentally fell downstairs.
He didn't move. Nothing happens.
He's still alive... He didn't feel too surprised. He was just so numb, listening without a word. There are many follow-up reports on this matter. The strange murder case is the traffic password.
He Yu was quite concerned about this matter before, but now he woke up from a coma and heard this on the radio, he only felt numbly—
What does it have to do with him.
Everything in this world has nothing to do with him.
Suddenly, a voice came from the bedside: "He Yu, are you awake?"
He Yu moved his head, only now did he realize that Lu Zhishu was actually there.
She came back and was sitting worriedly beside his hospital bed. Seeing him open her eyes, she hurriedly said, "Before you—"
After a few seconds of silence.
He Yu opened his mouth, his voice hoarse when he first woke up: "I know what happened before."
When he said this, he responded with a certain look of surprise to her existence, and then said blankly: "I told you to leave me alone, why are you always staying in Shanghai?"
Lu Zhishu did not get the warm situation she expected after the mother and son met, and He Yu was not grateful for her bed.
She didn't expect his tone to be like this when he woke up, and she couldn't help but froze: "Why do you, your child talk to mother like this?"
"Then how do you want me to talk to you? One word of honor? I'm not in the mood right now. I'm sick, do you know? I'm just pretending to be gentle and courteous to you. This is my true face, can't stand it? If you can't go back to Yanzhou to find He Li, don't dangle in front of my eyes every day."
Lu Zhishu was suddenly very angry. She was wearing a black lace see-through dress today, but she was too plump. In addition, He Yu was trembling with anger, and she looked like a trembling fat spider: "... Mom knows that Mom was left out in the past. you, but you won't be... you won't be..."
"I hope you will continue to treat me in the cold." He Yu's eyes were cold, "I'm used to it, do you understand?"
"… "
"Please go out."
Lu Zhishu wanted to say something, but He Yu's eyes had become a little terrifying.
"go out."
She staggered, but went out anyway.
He Jiwei also came back. When Lu Zhishu went downstairs, he met him in the living room.
He Jiwei did not expect that as soon as he entered the door, he was greeted by a wife who was so angry that her son cried.
Lu Zhishu had not been so weak in front of him for a long time.
She walked downstairs, sat down on the sofa, took a few tissues, wiped her tears, and turned her head without looking at He Jiwei.
He Jiwei: "...you quarreled with him?"
"He just woke up. I want to have a good talk with him. I want to find another personal doctor for him. Recently, I saw him taking too much medicine. You also know that if this medicine finally fails, his mental state will be affected. There is no chemical way to control it." Lu Zhishu sniffed, but still didn't turn his head, staring at the corner of the coffee table, as if that corner had some deep hatred with her.
"I am also kind, and I also care about him. I am his biological mother, can I harm him?"
He Jiwei: "..."
"But he just doesn't listen. He's too hostile to me." Lu Zhishu took out a few more tissues and twitched her nose loudly. She wasn't like this when she was young.
"Lao He, help me persuade him."
Lu Zhishu burst into tears again.
"I'm really wronged... You said, you said that I paid so much for him, and he didn't even know that it was for him that I became what I am now... How uncomfortable did I feel when he treated me like this? I'm really aggrieved."
She said, burying her face in her stubby, fat palms.
"I'm a mother too..."
The He family's family relationship is actually very delicate, twisted, and eccentric. It's not the atmosphere that a normal family should have at all.
He Jiwei read Lu Zhi's book for a while, and said with a sullen face, "I'll go up and talk to him."
He Jiwei went upstairs and came to He Yu's bedroom.
The father and son rarely meet each other, and the black-haired man is sick in bed again. The next second will probably be the scene of his father tearing up and choking and blaming himself. However-
"Snapped!"
A loud slap slapped He Yu's face. He Jiwei is different from Lu Zhishu. He is usually serious and reasonable, but at this moment he couldn't hold back, so he scolded him sharply: "He Yu, you have learned to seek death. Yes?"
He Yusheng received this ear scratch, and there was not even half an inch of waves on his face, but his face was beaten to the side, and when he turned back, there were faint bloodstains on the corners of his mouth.
He Yu was stained with blood and smiled: "My God, why are you back. I'm not at the point where I need you two to attend my funeral together."
"What nonsense are you talking about!"
"What are you doing backing up?"
"… "
He Yu's eyes fell on He Jiwei's leather shoes, and when the boy's indistinguishable smile widened, he saw that He Jiwei undoubtedly took a step back.
He moved his hands and feet slightly, and his eyes moved to the ceiling again.
Still smiling lightly: "Don't be afraid. Haven't I already been tied up by you guys?"
There were many restraints on He Yu's bed. He Jiwei and Lu Zhishu were hiding the fact that he was ill from everyone, but they couldn't hide it from themselves. Although He Yu has never brutally harmed other people or animals in public, almost all doctors' ratings of violence against him have reached an index similar to that of a perverted murderer.
He Jiwei's cheeks moved, and after a while he said, "This is for your own good."
He Yu moved freely in the restraint belt and smiled: "Thank you."
He Jiwei: "... When did the condition worsen so badly, don't tell me?"
"I seem to be insane," He Yu said casually, "what do you expect me to say?"
"He Yu, if it goes on like this, you may have to be sent to the hospital for compulsory isolation." He Jiwei lowered his voice, his eyes were a little complicated, "Do you want to lose your freedom? Be locked up like an animal? Your mother and I will hide it for you. It's been so long, just so you can be as normal as possible—"
"It's to keep the He family running as normal as possible for a long time." He Yu looked at the ceiling and smiled lightly.
He Jiwei fell silent as if his vocal cords had been cut.
"It's not that one day it becomes the talk of others after dinner, what to say, the eldest son of the He family, who looks bright and good in character and study, turns out to be a lunatic. It's hidden really deep. It turns out that the He family is so bad - he still does medicine. , his own disease can not be cured."
He turned his head, his hands and feet were tied, but he smiled at Yan Yan, with a terrifying temperament: "Am I right? Dad?"
He Jiwei's face was gray and defeated, and his expression was very angry, but there seemed to be a trace of guilt for He Yu in the anger after all.
He Yu couldn't see, his eyes were empty.
"After you gave birth to me, you found out that I was sick, so just strangle me to death. What are you keeping me for? You guys are trembling all day long. I walk around every day. It's really boring to torture each other."
"He Yu..."
"Go away, I'm not used to having you here, I'm even more crazy, I can't hide in the future, I'm afraid I will lose all your face."
He Jiwei seemed to want to say a few soft words, but the number of times he met his eldest son was pitiful. He was also a powerful man and used to giving orders. Softness was far more difficult for him than hardness.
"… "
He Yu turned his face on the bed, not wanting to look at his father.
The house was eerily silent.
During this silent process, He Jiwei's eyes slowly changed from anger to guilt, from guilt to grief, and from grief to calmness.
He began to regret the slap he gave He Yu as soon as he entered the door.
At that moment he really couldn't control it.
He knew that He Yu had fallen from the building - although the floor was not high.
He saw that Lu Zhishu was so embarrassed by He Yu.
His exhaustion, anger, fear and anxiety at that moment were the most real, wrapped around his hand and slapped He Yu's face uncontrollably.
Although he didn't accompany He Yu very much, he did not call He Yu. This was the first time.
No matter how indifferent he was to He Yu, they were both father and son. He didn't say a word when he saw that He Yu was so crazy, and said no, it was fake.
He couldn't take it any longer.
He pulled up a chair and sat down beside He Yu's bed.
Father lowered his head and said nothing, as if he didn't want to tell him anything, just checked He Yu's injury, and then—
"Click."
Slight sound.
He Jiwei untied his restraint.
"..." He Yu opened his eyes.
After He Jiwei loosened his belt, he didn't speak for a long time.
The father and son looked at each other, silent for a long time.
He Jiwei hadn't set foot in this bedroom for a long time. In this silence, he turned his eyes away, looked around, and finally his eyes fell on He Yu's empty bedside.
He decided to speak, and his tone was tired, but he was no longer so severe, so inhumane: "... He Yu. I remember that there used to be a group photo of the three of us on your bedside table."
"That's still a photo of you when you were four years old. We took it together in Yellowstone Park..."
He Yu also opened his mouth, his tone was still cold, but at least he got back to him: "I've lost that photo for ten years."
"… "
It is obviously a villa room with such exquisite decoration, but at this moment it is as cold as an ice cellar.
He Jiwei sighed and wanted to knock on a cigarette and smoke it.
He Yu said, "I don't like second-hand smoke. If you want to smoke, go out and smoke."
"..." He Jiwei coughed and took back the cigarette embarrassingly, "I'm not too addicted to smoking. I don't smoke anymore. What happened just now... It's my fault, I'm excited."
"He Yu, I'll stay here with you for a while."
If this sentence were changed ten years ago, He Yu would have softened his heart.
Fifteen years ago, He Yu would even cry.
But now, after all, it is too late. He Yu's heart had grown a thick cocoon. This meager tenderness would only make him feel that his heart was disturbed, but he could not perceive any clear emotions.
He Jiwei was quiet for a while, and then said, "I know, you have complained against us all these years. Since your brother came into this world, we have really accompany you too little, I don't want to argue any more, if we don't do well, it's just If you don't do well, our neglect of you is a fact that cannot be shied away."
Father played with the unlit cigarette and whispered.
"That's not negligence." He Yu said indifferently, "It seems more appropriate to say that it is disgust."
He Jiwei's hand trembled.
He also noticed that He Yu seemed to have become more ruthless.
He Yu would not speak to him so frankly before, even if he was dissatisfied, verbal courtesy and courtesy were always there.
He Jiwei stared at the thick woolen carpet in the bedroom, and said for a while, "... He Yu, she doesn't hate you."
"She's just hating her own past."
"… "
The room was so quiet that the ticking of the clock could be heard.
Time passed by minute by minute, He Jiwei rubbed the cigarette between his fingers, he was struggling with himself in the last resort - or, he had already decided to have such a conversation with He Yu, but he was sitting in this room at the moment. In an unfamiliar room, he didn't know where to start.
He was silent, pondering.
In the end, he sighed deeply and said, "He Yu, there are some things that we have never told you before. Because you were still too young, you were not even an adult at that time, I was worried that after I said it, It will be more difficult for you psychologically. And your mother, that itself is a very painful scar for her. It is even more impossible for her to open it herself and lead you to touch it."
"But I think—I feel more and more recently that it's time to tell you." He Jiwei said, "Perhaps after listening, you can be less self-sabotaging, and you can... Maybe you can too, understand her a little bit. ."
"I already understand enough—" He Yu sat up abruptly from the bed.
"Just listen to me and finish." He Jiwei said, "I rarely talk to you alone like this. This time, please listen to me patiently. Then, if you have any dissatisfaction, if you have any resentment, you You can vent with me. Is that okay?"
"… "
"You're my son, and I know that for some things, I've always made you sacrifice too much."
After a long silence, He Yu finally lay back between the pillows and mattresses, raised his hand and covered his eyes with his arm, as if not seeing He Jiwei would make him a little more rational.
"You said." Finally he said coldly, "I'm listening."
The author has something to say: Today's thanks also ends at 17:00~
Thank you to the little angel who voted or irrigated nutrient solution for me during 2021-10-2017:00:24~2021-10-2117:00:00~
Thanks to the little angel who threw out the deep-water torpedoes: Pizhi, I knocked 1 in 10,000 years;
Thanks to the little angel who threw the shallow water bomb: ko1;
Thanks to the little angel who cast the rocket launcher: 4 Xunluoqiao; 2 Xue Luo, みけねこ; みかん畑のひと, ねここ, Kirin, Hou Yehou, shioisu, Ranwannist Burning Night Perfect Match, Spring Mountain Yishui, Rong 1: 琡, saji, pau, singer method;
Thanks to the little angels who threw the grenade: Zhang _xy_, ののむら 2; a group of cat hair, Xi Xiaoxi, Meow Xiaoke, neige-ゆき, かな, CHISEENBUDDY, contempt from the black tower, ねここ, Xueqi,あか, あみ, 40892265, blue leaf blue night, July 1, seven nights away, snowy April, あっくん, もつ, shioisu, Moli under the tree, りり☆, Xiaoyue, Libao 1;
Thanks to the little angel who threw mines: 28848159, 5 Baekhyun beans; 4 meat buns lying in my arms; Wanning baby, Wuli Park handso, Ouyang Fuxue 3; bloge, cotton candy cubes, かげる, It's Xue Yang, Shuangxue, a beautiful goose, Xiaoyue, Wei Yurenjian, Jiangjiangjiang Jiangjiang 2; 20162565, Happy Prince, Who is my white moonlight, Yinling Laner, やまだ, Cookie sound, big Miss temper, 48805806, grass by the green river, 49027071, Erha in the cat's nest, 21779387, ほのか, 50515170, what's the nickname Qiu, little bear daughter-in-law, Luoluo bamboo, tomato little fox, only this name is worthy of me, The flesh should be thin, Chu Wanning's waist seal, papaya, a certain Tong, jiuli, Cas, Shell_Liang, 25291016, rice fruit crystal, fish poor, 52516034, aolishx, 40648628, terwoven, 41642487, I want to be happy every day, Mo Yin , 35492796, starry, すいせい, sweet tea, celucci, sleepy, rustling, 53285360, new liban Australian essence, snow salt cream, seventy-four, a lot of meat hhh, こん fox, さくら, 54010687, 46240979, small tomatoes next door, roasted rolls, Pepsi Cola, 53561967, 55661831, りょうこ, every day is every day, 47402531, ふっかふかさん, limited time joys and sorrows, warm reminder, YKT grapes, Rongyu, 44442085 Cat, Magpie, Nanashiro, Wu Mu You Mian Di, Li Li, Lao 3, LLY, Wushan Resentment, Aoi Xiaoxiao, Saku, あみ, そると, 53192841, Oranges Are Not Sweet, A Yanyan, angel, Azhi, Bubble Tea Hits the Earth, Caviar Fay, Brahma Brahma, nfed, Vitality Girl Erzhuzhu, Yan Yichen, Kyuu, Moon and Tide, HaiPhai, 3 million boiled water, kikyowith, Qi is not Qi, A lady, I am you Husband, Aiba Aiba, it doesn't matter who I am, 344410971;
Thanks to the little angel who irrigated the nutrient solution: 60 bottles of Noyehou, Nanyin; 30 bottles of Qingqing; Liuyuefengxiao, intelligent creatures of Shanhaijing, green onion i small fish, 45895481, good night coo, Yan Jian, Qing Tian, NH 20 bottles are prohibited; 19 bottles of Rongyan; love to eat meat buns, bully men and women and laugh at cats, Qingqiao Luoque, jxf, おやさい, oh, Huasheng, 38590484, Xiao Ganluo, I haven't eaten dessert today, Qingよ, Dan, Anoxia, the debate between Chu Si and Yansui, Linyuan, sleepy 10 bottles; Da! Red duck!, Rebirth of Zhichu is my wife 9 bottles; Red Hibiscus and Xifu Begonia 8 bottles; Mu Xiao 7 bottles ; 6 bottles of Erli; Jiang Muyu, Shell_Liang, Nan, zz, some salt to eat, FAFA, less than 5 bottles of personal signature; Stream, Dynamic Superman, Lin Axiao., Ling 3 bottles; 212, 53141391, contempt from the black tower, CHISEENBUDDY, a child in a sack, citrus gardenia, a salted fish, Muchen, 9042 bottles; 枡, ciao , South faction or North, A Qing acridine, 53135937, big face with eye mucus, madly criticizing special prescriptions, favorite late night, shark's heart boy spade K, Pepsi, Ji Xingling, toilet guard, late night feeding fish, 1 bottle of Rest in the Boat, 48002761, Jiaojiao, Xiaoxiaowen, Gumu Canxia, Qingruxu, Trity2104, Xiaoxierua Cat Cat;
Thank you Baobei, I will continue to do things~