"With the Majesty protecting me, what do I have to fear?"
Concubine Ning shook her head. "You are smart. If you hadn't thought of joining the Shangyi Bureau to prove your innocence, our Yang family would have been in trouble this time."
Yang Wan twisted the jade string hanging on her waist, lowered her head and said softly: "It was originally my fault. I just saved myself."
Concubine Ning held her hand and held it in her arms.
Yang Wan took a step back and said, "Your Majesty... No need, I am not cold."
Concubine Ning grabbed her hand that was about to be retracted, tilted her head and looked into her eyes, "Don't move, I want to ask you, did you... like that person when you were at home?"
Yang Wan was stunned.
Speaking of which, when it comes to the matter of Yang Wan and Deng Ying, Concubine Ning's attitude is much calmer than Yang Lun's, so much so that Yang Wan doesn't want to evade her.
"I can't say I like him. I've never liked anyone before..."
Concubine Ning squeezed her hand and said, "You are already eighteen."
Eighteen. How young.
Yang Wan sighed in her heart.
She has lived for nearly thirty years in modern times, her life is full of snow, her love history is so clean that she can't even write a word, she is sexually apathetic, and a full-time scientific researcher. If it were now, she would have to ask the government for a memorial archway. How could she be called dead by all in modern times? She is so humble that it's like she is really a disaster.
So what happened in between
How is the text produced? How is the connotation interpreted
With this kind of thinking, it seems that the field of the history of victimization of female reputation can add a new deconstructionist research direction.
Her thoughts wandered and she didn't bother to agree to Concubine Ning.
Seeing that she didn't say anything, Concubine Ning took her hand and pulled her to her side. "Forget it. When I entered the palace, you were still a little girl. After you grew up, I rarely saw you and couldn't listen to you. It's good that you come in now. Zhang Luo was chosen by father. I was young at that time and couldn't see anything or say anything. Now I have some strength. You stay with me for another year or two and let me slowly choose for you. I will definitely find a good man who suits your heart, but you have to promise me that you must protect your reputation. If you don't really like that person, don't get entangled with him anymore."
Yang Wan lowered her eyes, "What if you like it?"
Concubine Ning was silent for a while, and then she said softly, "Don't go down this path in the palace with someone like that, Wan'er. You won't be happy in the end."
For some reason, Yang Wan felt that the woman who said this didn't seem very happy either.
She didn't want to make her feel bad anymore, so she looked up and smiled at her, "Don't worry, I know."
After saying that, she bent down, took Yi Lang's hand, and followed Concubine Ning into the palace.
The rain water on the ground has not dried yet, and when you step on it, there is a sound of mirror-breaking.
Yang Wan said softly to the dark shadow on the ground, "My Lady, sometimes I feel that innocence and chastity are broken to begin with, and it is meaningless no matter what we say."
Concubine Ning turned her head to look at her, "Why do you think so? Your reputation is so important. Life is so long. It would be so uncomfortable if you always live under the guidance of others."
Yang Wan shook her head. "No matter how clean a person is, they will be criticized. People don't criticize us because we have made mistakes, but they criticize us so that they can appear to be clean people."
After hearing this, Concubine Ning was stunned. She stopped under the tree in the yard and looked into Yang Wan's eyes.
"Since you came to the palace this time, I feel that the way you speak and act is very different from your brothers. In the past few years..."
She paused, as if hesitating whether she should ask her.
"Well... Have you had a bad time at home these past few years... Or are your mother and brother not treating you well?"
Yang Wan hurriedly said, "No, Madam, they are all very nice to me."
A trace of heartache flashed in Concubine Ning's eyes. "But why do you speak as if you are holding snow in your mouth? At first glance, I don't feel it, but when I think about it carefully, it's so cold that it doesn't sound like something a teenage girl would say."
"… "
These words seemed like an attempt to pierce her, but in fact they were very heartwarming.
Yang Wan couldn't explain it, but fortunately, He Yu, a maidservant beside Concubine Ning, came out from the palace and asked, "My lady, is Miss Wan still staying in our palace today?"
Concubine Ning turned around and nodded, "Yes, where is His Majesty now?"
He Yu replied: "I went to see the Queen."
"Okay, got it."
Concubine Ning agreed, turned around and patted the back of Yang Wan's hand, "Rest with your sister tonight."
Yang Wan nodded, "Yes, but tomorrow, I will report to Jiang Shangyi and go back to the South Residence. It will not be good for you to stay here with the Majesty for too long."
"No need. Since I've asked the Queen for grace to let you stay in my palace for a few days, you can stay here with peace of mind. Yi Lang will be happy to see you, and I'll be happy if you can play with him more."
Yang Wan was about to speak when she saw the little man under her feet pulling her sleeve and swinging her back and forth.
"Aunt, Aunt, try changing into a little person again."
Although Yang Wan had never thought about having children, she had no resistance to soft and tender children.
Seeing him fluttering around him like a little ball, she squatted down, put her arms around his waist and picked her up.
"My little prince, you are shaking my head so hard that I am dizzy."
Concubine Ning quickly reached out and supported Yi Lang's arm and asked her.
"Wan'er, can you hold it? I heard that your neck was badly injured, and the child is much heavier now."
Yang Wan pulled Yi Lang's collar together and said, "It's all right, madam. Let's go in. I'll turn myself into a little person for you to see."
**
That night, the tide was still very strong.
The palace maids burned mugwort in the inner hall to fumigate the beds.
Yang Wan held Yi Lang on her lap and used a few magic tricks to make him giggle for a long time.
The wet nurse came to urge her several times but was reluctant to leave her behind. Later, she actually fell asleep in Yang Wan's arms.
Concubine Ning sat aside and peeled a lot of chestnuts for Yang Wan, saying that she saw that Yang Wan liked to eat nuts, so she asked someone to bring a few cans for her today.
Yang Wan ate a chestnut peeled by Concubine Ning, and when she saw Concubine Ning pushing another handful towards her, she didn't say anything more. She took the child from her arms and went behind the ground cover.
Yang Wan looked at the chestnut in front of her and tried to recall Concubine Yi Ning's life.
The life story of Concubine Ning is unknown, and there is no specific record of the year she died. We only know that she was the mother of Emperor Jinghe Zhu Yilang, and later she seemed to have made some mistakes and was rejected by the emperor. After Emperor Jinghe ascended the throne, he did not grant her a posthumous title.
Yang Wan opened her notes, hesitated for a while with her chin supported, and finally turned to another page and added Concubine Ning's name - Yang Yu.
After finishing writing, he sat quietly for a while under the lamp with his chin in his hand.
I remembered Concubine Ning saying, "Wan'er, don't follow someone like that. You won't be happy in the end if you follow this path in the palace."
After thinking about it carefully, and thinking about his appearance and personality, I suddenly found it difficult to put pen to paper.
If she had a fanatical spectator's mentality towards men's conquests, then she had a compassion for those women in history who shared the same fate as her.
So she simply put down her pen and wrote nothing, closed her notebook and looked out the window.
Beyond the green veil, clouds are scattered and stars are emerging, it is so unclear.
**
In a blink of an eye, it was April of the twelfth year of Zhenning.
It was late spring, and the apricot blossoms had just bloomed, covering the ground with fallen petals. The rain washed away the fallen petals, which flowed to every corner of the imperial city.
The reconstruction of the Hall of Supreme Harmony has entered the stage of covering the roof, but the Liulichang in the suburbs of Beijing has not been able to deliver the tiles. The Ministry of Works went down to investigate and found a eunuch named Wang Shunchang in Liulichang. Although it was not a particularly big case, the final investigation shocked the entire Ming court. This person supervised Liulichang for ten years and actually embezzled more than two million silver coins. It was equivalent to the annual income of the court during the Zhenning period.
When the officials of the six ministries who were still waiting for relief grain from the imperial court heard the news, they almost threw stones to death on the way Wang Shunchang was locked up and taken to the imperial prison. However, the inner court kept a tight lid on this matter, and the managers of all places summoned their subordinates and strictly ordered them not to discuss Wang Shunchang's corruption case privately.
On this day, the inner school was about to adjourn, and Deng Ying was sitting in the lecture hall, explaining something to a eunuch boy.
Yang Wan sat in a seat near the window, lowered her head and wrote quickly.
Deng Ying took the opportunity to look up at her. She was not on duty today, so she was not wearing the palace uniform of the Shangyi Bureau.
She wore a moon-white short shirt over a lotus-colored skirt, with only a silver tassel hairpin with a pearl pendant on her arm. Under her arm was the small notebook she often wrote in, her wrist hanging down, the tip of her pen moving quickly. Occasionally she would stop writing, tap her chin with her fingers, and after she figured it out, she would write again and again.
It was a fine spring day, and a kingfisher preening its feathers was perched on a branch through the window.
After putting down her pen, Yang Wan picked up the cup and took a sip of water, then leaned on the window and fed the birds with nuts wrapped in silk.
When she noticed Deng Ying was looking at her, she held up her face and smiled.
"You guys continue, I've finished what I wanted to write today."
The eunuch was only seven or eight years old, so he would not misunderstand their relationship.
She turned around and bowed to Yang Wan: "I can't understand what the maid wrote."
After saying that, he looked at Deng Ying again, "Sir, can you understand?"
Deng Ying smiled and shook her head.
"I'm just drawing talismans, don't try to imitate them. Just follow your teacher, because what he says is the real wisdom."
The eunuch nodded to Yang Wan and said, "Sir, my mother said that eunuchs are miserable people. My family is poor. If I hadn't been sold to an official, my brothers wouldn't have survived. People in my family can't even read, let alone study. Sir, you are the same as us. Why are you so knowledgeable?"
After listening to what he said, Yang Wan stood up, walked a few steps to the eunuch, and gently lifted his nose.
"Hey, you little kid, you don't even know how to praise others."
The child twisted his body, "Please don't pinch my nose. It is said that the maids in the Shangyi Bureau are all very polite. Why are you..."
"What did you say?"
Yang Wan was in a dilemma as to whether to let go or not.
Deng Ying smiled and closed the book, "There are times when you can't win an argument."
Yang Wan let go of her hand, folded her arms and stood up, lowered her head and said to Deng Ying: "He is young, I won't argue with him, and you shouldn't argue with him either."
Deng Ying handed a handful of nuts to the eunuch boy, and replied with a smile, "Sir, you were a scholar before."
The child got the fruit and hid it in his sleeve happily. He looked up and asked him again, "Why do scholars have to be slaves in the palace like us?"
"Because the gentleman made a mistake."
"oh… "
The eunuch's eyes suddenly dimmed.
Deng Ying raised her arm and pushed the book to him, "Go ahead, remember to read tomorrow's book."
"Got it sir."
Yang Wan watched the child leave without noticing the nuts that fell to the ground, and pursed her lips.
"Why should I tell him the truth?"
Deng Ying stood up and walked to the door, bent down and picked up the fruits one by one.
The light blue palace dress was spread on the ground, and the scarred hand was once again exposed to Yang Wan's eyes.
After picking up the trash, he stood up, glanced at where the child ran away, and said casually, "They will find out eventually."
"Once they know this, they will no longer treat you as one of their own."
"Why?"
"… "
This is a study on the conflicting identities between the eunuch group and the civil servant group in the Ming Dynasty.
Deng Ying couldn't understand the problem because he was in the situation. Yang Wan felt that if she told him directly, it would be like mental torture.
So he pursed his lips and said nothing more, walked to the window and sat down again.
Unexpectedly, as soon as he sat down, he heard the dull sound of a stick coming from the courtyard outside the inner study.
She was about to open the window to look, but she heard Deng Ying say to her, "Come here, Yang Wan."