Death Progress Bar

Chapter 124: coward

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After a meal, a total of seven people on the table, except for Lian Jun, were all drunk.

The first person to be drunk was Li Jiuzheng. He drank too much liquor at one time, and he fainted directly. The second drunk was Rong Zhouzhong. He didn't drink less when he and Li Jiuzheng had a drink. He fell asleep on the table not long after Li Jiuzheng fell.

After that, Shi Weichong and Fei Yujing, they ate and chatted, and drank a lot without knowing it. The two remaining Shijin and Xiang Aoting seem to be eating seriously. They were too happy to talk about the ingredients. Shi Jin was interested, and they had to pull Xiang Aoting to taste the wine. They took a sip of this wine and that wine. Take a sip, Jiujin slowly rises, and when Lian Jun finds something is wrong, they are already leaning on the chair and becoming confused.

Lian Jun pulled Shi Jin into his arms and leaned against him when he was lying on the chair and talking nonsense, gently touched his face, and called out Gua Yi.

Gua Yi turned in from outside the restaurant and waited for instructions.

"Take them to the guest room, let Uncle Long show them, don't let them drink the problem, remember to give them anti-alcoholism." Lian Jun ordered, and then got up when he hugged him, carrying him not completely drunk. Shijin in the past walked towards the room.

Gua Yi responded with a yes, took out his mobile phone and called someone to come and help.

Shi Jin followed Lian Jun to the outside. When he was about to walk out of the restaurant, his eyes were clear for a brief moment, and he looked back at the Shi family brothers who were in a mess at the table.

"They were drunk deliberately." He whispered, not knowing who he was talking to, "So even if they wake up tomorrow and find that everything is empty, they can also lie to themselves that they had a dream... The fainthearted."

Lian Jun also took a look at the Shi family brothers, and praised the saying that they were drunk at the same time—the timing of these people's drunkenness was too unified, and it must be deliberate.

"They are all cowards." Shi Jin turned back and leaned on Lian Jun, "Me too... but I still have you, Lian Jun, don't leave me, I will die."

Lian Jun also retracted his gaze, hugged his hands tightly, kissed his forehead sideways, and led him forward, saying: "No, I will always be with you."

"It's great." Shijin put all his weight on him, rubbed his shoulder, and was quiet for a while, then suddenly said, "Lian Jun, I'm Shijin."

Lian Jun looked at him sideways.

"My father's name is Shi Lei and my mother's name is Lanxiao. They live in a town named Huaiyang and run a small supermarket. I was adopted by them at birth... My father is a good old man, soft-hearted and sensitive, my mother Stronger, but it's actually a knife mouth tofu heart... They are very good, and they will definitely like you."

Lian Jun's forward footsteps stopped abruptly, staring at him blankly.

"I actually have a special nickname called Da Zhuang. My mother started it. She said that only children can grow well. Until I went to elementary school, I thought my name was Shi Da Zhuang. Then I In order to get me used to my name, Dad actually changed the name of the supermarket at home to enter the supermarket. They are very cute, right? This is my parents... completely different from Shi Xingrui."

Lian Jun's fingers trembled, and he hugged him tightly in his arms.

Shijin leaned in his arms, nudged him affectionately, and said, "Don't worry, I am not schizophrenic or psychiatric. What I said is true. Those are all things I have experienced... Believe me. Okay, I'm really not crazy."

"... I believe you." Lian Jun said grimly, smoothing his back comfortably, "I know you are not crazy, you are fine, I know."

Shi Jinhui hugged him, as if drunk and awake: "I knew you would say that, you are always so good... In fact, it doesn't matter if you don't believe it. I am a drunk now. Just forget it..."

Lian Jun tightened his arm even more.

The two hugged quietly for a while, and then continued to walk towards the room.

Probably because of the drunkenness, Shijin's words began to be scattered and incoherent.

"I'm actually as old as you... I'm really a policeman, I don't lie to you, I have been for many years... Carefully calculate whether I have been dead twice... Originally, my memory is blurred, Shi Weichong or something I don’t remember anything about Li Jiuzheng, and Shi Xingrui. They are all strangers. They are all names written in ink in the book. They don’t make any sense... It’s strange that my parents didn’t really want me back then. Being a policeman said it was too hard, but why did I insist on getting into the police academy..."

The two finally reached the room. Lian Jun helped Shi into the bathroom, stripped him of his clothes, settled him in the bathtub and leaned against him, and took the shower to wash him with the smell of wine.

Shi Jin was stunned to look at the drenching water column, his eyes seemed to be clear again, and he said: "I remember, it is me who is asking for help, asking for help constantly, whether it is pain or resentment, come someone to help me. Someone pulls me out. These things are terrible. How can someone like me who grew up in a honeypot stand... No, is that me? No, it shouldn't be me... I am that Shijin, not this Time advancement, not this time advancement..."

Lian Jun held the hand of the shower and slowly tightened it until the joints became white.

"But why didn't anyone come to save me... No, the fourth brother saved me once, and he was very powerful... Then if I became like him, can I save myself... I tried very hard, right, to save myself like that? Desperately..."

Lian Jun took a deep breath, reached out his hand to wipe away the tears from the corner of his eye, threw the flowers away, leaned in and hugged him tightly.

Shi Jin leaned on him, turned his head to the side, looked at the mist rising in the bathroom, his eyes became confused again, and he whispered: "Dad is gone, and my brothers have changed. Actually I don’t want money. If you care too much, just take it if you want it, but how can the human heart be changed. I used to laugh at them, and they would laugh at me too, but then I laughed at them, they would only look at me coldly and look at me with hatred. I, look at me sarcastically, look at me hesitantly, look at me with murderous intent... It's even more impossible to cry, I'll be hated... I'm obviously still me, but everyone treats me differently. What is wrong, am I doing something wrong?"

"No." Lian Jun finally said, his voice low, depressed and tense, "You have done well, so far, you have done well."

"Then did I save myself?" Shijin raised his hand and grabbed his clothes.

"Saved, not only yourself, you also saved me, you are very powerful."

Shijin released his hand again, with a relieved smile on his face, and said, "That's good... Actually, I'm also a coward. If I'm not drunk, I don't dare to talk about some things..."

Lian Jun touched his back and said: "You are not a coward, you are brave, braver than anyone else."

"Really... That's great." Shijin's eyes were closed, and the corners of his eyes were a reddish scent of alcohol. His lips moved, and he murmured before falling asleep completely: "Little death, don't cry. very noisy… "

Lian Jun stopped his hand stroking his back, and then continued slowly, for a long time, and said softly: "Good night, Shi Jin."

Shi Jin slept until noon the next day. When he woke up, he was told by Lian Jun that Shi Weichong and the others had already gotten up early to catch the earliest flight and left. He was stunned for a while, and finally raised his hand to rub his head aches after the hangover, and said, "I understand, it's the end of the year, everyone is busy."

"They left a gift for you, do you want to see it?" Lian Jun asked.

Shi Jin shook his head, and was silly for a while before finally waking up. He looked at Lian Jun and asked, "Should we set off to the island? You have been bored in the house for so long, and you also need to go to a warm place. It's breathable."

Lian Jun touched his messy hair and asked: "When do you want to go there? Gua Liu has already sorted out there, we can go there anytime."

Shijin rarely gave a willful answer: "Today, I want to leave today." After reunion, of course, we parted ways. Everyone left. He didn't want to stay alone.

"Okay." Lian Jun leaned in to kiss him and said, "I'll make arrangements."

Even Jun Lian, when he decided to leave on the same day near noon, he could only hold the special plane scheduled until 11 o'clock in the evening, and he barely achieved Shijin's wish to leave that day.

"I have to go to the plane to rest." Lian Jun helped Shijin pack his luggage, and half of a box of items was actually textbooks.

Shijin pretended not to see it, rubbed his chest stuffed with snacks, and said, "You must sleep a little longer for your nap today."

"Are you with me?" Lian Jun put down his textbook and looked at him.

Shijin looked at him and said, "Of course I will accompany you."

After waking up for an afternoon nap, Lian Jun found that Shi Jin became a little restless after receiving a text message, and turned his head to look out the window from time to time. He slid his wheelchair and leaned over, and asked, "Want to go out and build a snowman? When I come back next time, the snow should be gone."

Shi Jin frowned and thought for a while, and said, "Hey, let's make a smaller one this year."

The two came to the lounge where they stayed when they made the snowman last year, Shijin wrapped Lian Jun tightly, and wrapped tightly himself, then led Lian Jun out and walked to the one with the thickest snow. In the corner, drag Lian Jun to squat down, let him pinch a snowball with himself.

"You squeeze a smaller one, I squeeze a larger one, and then put it together, it is a snowman." Shi Jin said of his plan.

Lian Jun asked: "Don't want to pile up tricks?"

"Wait for next year." Shijin replied and smiled at him. "This year we will still follow the tradition."

Lian Jun knew that he was caring about his physical condition, smiled, and replied, "Okay."

In the end, the two people piled up a mini snowman with talented calves outside, and the total time was not even twenty minutes. Shi Jin was very satisfied, took Lian Jun and took a photo with the Snowman, then took Lian Jun back to the house, and hurriedly took him to wash his hands, wash his face and warm his body.

Lian Jun looked at Shijin's efforts to take care of himself, and felt a little painful.

This talent should be taken care of by everyone. He unconsciously stretched out his hand and hugged Shijin in his arms.

Shijin was puzzled, looked at him sideways, and asked, "What's the matter?"

"If you want to do it, do it." He said, and when he kissed his ears red with the cold wind, "Don't worry about me, I just want to make you happy."

Shi Jin bowed his head and hugged him tightly, remembering the words that Rong Zhouzhong and Xiang Aoting had sent, saying that Li Jiuzheng's face was bad when he left in the morning, and he didn't say anything.

The sky slowly darkened, and the time of departure was getting closer. Shi Jin kept turning his head and looked out the window, and finally when the clock reached seven o'clock, he couldn't help but stand up, looked at Lian Jun and said, "I'll go out once, and I'll be back before half past nine."

"It's too late, the eleven o'clock plane, we will leave for the airport at nine o'clock at the latest." Lian Jun shook his head.

Shi Jin was stunned, raised his hand and patted his forehead, and said, "I actually forgot how terrible the traffic in City B was...nothing, then we..."

"But if we start now, I might be able to let you go somewhere halfway and stop for a while." Lian Jun added, sliding the wheelchair out, holding his hand, and asking, "Do you want to start now? Gua Er, they have moved all their luggage to the car, and the team has been integrated."

Shijin looked at him stupidly, then squeezed his hand back, and said, "Let’s go, I want to take a trip to the university town... okay?"

"Of course." Lian Jun replied and took his hand and kissed him.

The car was speeding on the street. Outside the car was the familiar scenery of the University Town. Shi Jin reached into his pocket and held the key inside-that was the key to Li Jiuzheng's apartment, and he was on his way there now.

And why go there... He took out his phone, clicked on the text message page, skipped Rong Zhouzhong and Xiang Aoting’s text messages, and looked at the last message Li Jiuzheng sent this morning: Thank you, I understand, please continue to hate me , I will continue to love you, you are a gift from God, I will cherish you, and see [Love] in the next year.

It is still a mess of adolescent melancholy boys with pain in the text message style, but some of them are familiar with words that seem to be engraved in the soul, but it really makes him unable to ignore it like he used to.

The word gift is really...

"Your fifth brother should have returned to Rongcheng, right." Gua Er, who was sitting in the passenger seat, suddenly said, looking at the university town that has become very deserted outside, rubbing his arms exaggeratedly, "The students are all going home on holiday. , It has become an empty city, and it looks terrifying at night."

"I didn't go back to Rongcheng." Shi Jin recovered his mind and looked in the direction of Li Jiuzheng's residence. "The place where his mother and grandparents are buried, during the New Year, he won't go back." This time last year , Li Jiuzheng also stayed in City B, and after receiving his call for help, he immediately rushed to rescue him.

Yes, save, no matter what Li Jiuzheng did later, in the circumstances at the time, Li Jiuzheng saved him. In the last life, Li Jiuzheng actually saved the original owner. Leaving aside the messy mental devastation, at least physically, Li Jiuzheng fulfilled his responsibilities as a doctor. He not only rescued the original owner from the serious car accident, but also saved the original owner. Take it to your own hospital for personal care.

And those mental devastation... Shi Jin remembered what Li Jiuzheng said in front of his mother's grave last year, and tightened his lips.

He suddenly understood part of Li Jiuzheng's thoughts and actions. That person is really like a child, pure good and pure evil, and he can't express his emotions and feelings at all.

Maybe... It's just maybe, maybe the horrible words Li Jiuzheng said while standing by the original owner's bed in his previous life, and the act of holding a knife to help the original owner liberate, the starting point is actually not that malicious, maybe even with kindness. He was ill, just like Shi Weichong, calmly overwhelmed by the pressure and emotions exerted by his parents.

Healers do not heal themselves, and there may be no real or fake masks at all. All the split emotions shown by Li Jiuzheng are just symptoms of a patient.

When I was in pain, I wanted to drag everyone to hell together. When I recovered, I wanted to try my best to grasp the warmth that hadn't slipped away... The same, the same. And the same family environment, the original owner still has the false happiness and father's love escorted by the previous ten years, and Li Jiuzheng has nothing, whether it is his mother, father, brother, everyone gave him only the cruel reality And a lot of indigestible negative emotions.

What a young genius, those auras that have been put on their heads hard, are just a child who has been forced to a desperate situation, the only way to save himself. Children’s ideas are sometimes really simple. They always think that they understand a little more and grow up a little bit faster. The current dilemma can be simplified, and solutions to everyone’s problems can be found.

[But you are dead, what should I do. 】

What Li Jiuzheng once said flashed in his mind, Shijin's divergent thoughts suddenly closed, and he squeezed the key in his pocket firmly, and his brain had never been as clear as it is now.

In his previous life, Li Jiuzheng was crazy. He lost his father and mother. He had a relationship with several elder brothers. The only brother who felt special because of his mother's brainwashing was about to be taken away by the god of death. All the people involved who gave him pain and hope are dead, what should he do? What can he do? What will happen to a person who is mad and sick, who lives in the world and who has never really grown up

This was the first time that Shijin thought of something-after the original owner died, he had shown his intent to kill the original mainstream countless times, but he still didn't really do anything. He was still working hard to take the original owner back from the death god. Li Jiuzheng, what happened in the end

When the car stopped, Shi Jin returned to his senses and found that the community where Li Jiuzheng lived had arrived. He looked at the floor where Li Jiuzheng lived, with an impulse in his heart.

—Li Jiuzheng in his last life has no hope, so in this life, even if it is just for those actions called salvation, try again.

For the first time, he sensibly carried down all the emotions in his chest, and used Shijin's thoughts that had lived for more than 20 years to analyze and digest those that Shijin could understand and could not understand when he was dying at the age of eighteen. everything.

Don't let emotions control your reason, you can.

He stretched out his hand to open the car door, got out of the car and walked towards the building where Li Jiuzheng lived, getting faster and faster, and finally trot off, pressing the elevator on his head and rushing in.

"Jun Shao, is it really okay?" Gua Er asked with a frown looking at Shi Jin's back.

Lian Jun leaned on the back of the chair, touched the place where Shi was just sitting, and replied: "It doesn't matter, he knows what he is doing."

The elevator turned on, Shi Jin strode to the door of 3602, adjusted his breathing, took out the key and opened the door.

The room was completely dark, there was no heating, and it didn't look like someone was there at all. He stepped straight forward and came to the sofa. He saw a figure curled up on it and said, "I can only stay here for ten minutes at most, or I will miss the plane leaving here."

The person on the sofa did not move, as if already asleep.

"To be honest, I'm very afraid of you. You want to kill me. I can't let go, and I can't let go." Shijin paused, and his voice eased a little. "But you are right. Among the brothers , You and I are the most alike."

I don't know if it is an illusion, the figure on the sofa seems to be curled up tighter.

"I'm going to spend the winter on Lianjun's island. By the way, I will spend the New Year's Eve there." Shi Jin said, turning sideways, squeezing his fingers in his pockets tightly, turning them pale with force, "If you want to be together. So hurry up and pack yourself down, I only wait five minutes downstairs... Brother Five, I don’t want to hate you any more, that’s too tired, and I want to get rid of it.”

After he finished speaking, he turned around, did not go to see whether the person on the sofa was awake or asleep, and left the unpopular apartment without looking back.

The opportunity has been given. This is the hand that he overcame the repulsion and fear brought by the memory, exhausted the last trace of reason, and stretched out his hand again. Whether the other party should grasp it or not, he has no energy to manage.

Five minutes later, Shijin looked at the door of the building where no one had come out, and said, "Go, don't miss the plane."

Gua 1 immediately started the car, but Gua 2 suddenly yelled and said, "Wait, someone ran out."

When Shi Jin looked up, he saw Li Jiuzheng rushed out of the building wearing only a shirt, holding mobile phone IDs and other items in a mess in his hand. In the winter, his forehead was sweaty. He swept the door anxiously, saw the car that was leaving here, hurried over and stopped at the front of the car, panting, and said: "Xiao Jin, I, I and you, I'm looking for documents, I Forget where I put it, don't leave me, I'll be with you, let me be with you."

Shijin looked at him through the glass of the car, as if he had seen himself who had tried his best for help, closed his eyes, and stretched out his hand to open the car door.

"Come in, you won't be able to catch the plane."

A huge surprise erupted in Li Jiuzheng's eyes. He hurriedly walked around to help the car door and got into the car. He sat down close to him. He didn't know whether it was because of the cold or what, and was shaking with waves.

Shi Jin took out a blanket to wrap him, and found that he had run out without wearing shoes. At this time, the socks were all wetted by the water left after the snow melted, and the mats in the car were dirty.

"Sorry, dirty the car." Seeing him looking at his feet, Li Jiuzheng's expression became a little embarrassed.

"It's okay." Shijin took another towel out and motioned for him to take off his socks and wipe the water off his feet.

Li Jiuzheng did it hurriedly, acting a little anxiously, like a child who was afraid of being left behind by his family because of his mistakes.

Seeing his anxious expression and slightly pale face, Shijin suddenly felt a sense of return to stability. He felt that as long as he said something serious, he would be able to cry directly. Does such a person need fear