He loves you.
When he returned to the hotel room after eating, Shi Jin still echoed the words Rong Zhou said in his mind.
Fei Yujing, love, such a person, and such a vocabulary, he and it will actually be connected one day. That's right, Fei Yujing is also a human being. As long as he is a human, he will have seven emotions and six desires, and will unconsciously fall in love with someone or hate someone.
But why can't the brain still imagine Fei Yujingai's appearance as a person? Every time he thinks of this name, the first thing that pops up in his mind is always the other person's indifferent and calm expression and eyes.
"Fei Yujing's love..." he murmured, unexpectedly flashing through his mind the appearance of Fei Yujing leaning against the captain outside the captain in embarrassment.
That was probably when he felt most clearly and intuitively that Fei Yujing really cared about him... But even at the rest of his life, Fei Yujing still didn't have any extra expressions on his face. Even before that, when Li Jiuzheng was in madness because of being surrounded by ships, Fei Yujing was able to tie up Li Jiuzheng sensibly and prevent Li Jiuzheng from disturbing others.
How rational is it to achieve that level? Has Fei Yujing ever been emotionally exposed or collapsed
Shijin tried to recall the scene of meeting Fei Yujing in the past, and finally found that Fei Yujing had the most emotional fluctuation in front of him. It was actually at the meeting the year before, when the two met again, he threatened Fei Yujing to use himself again. When it hurt Fei Yujing's mother.
[My mother is the first person in this world who can make me pay like this, and you are the second. 】
What Fei Yujing had said in the morning flashed in his mind, his fingers trembled, and he felt shamelessly happy-now in Fei Yujing's mind, is he already that important? Has he become an existence that can affect Fei Yujing's mood
[What you want from me is not an emotional response, but an emotional need. 】
He was shocked suddenly, raised his hand and held his forehead: "Why do you think of this sentence..."
But... It really was a need, and Fei Yujing actually said it. The joy in his heart just now came about because he suddenly discovered that Fei Yujing might need him emotionally and value him
Why did Fei Yujing get it right again? How thoroughly did he see feelings and human feelings
Shi Jin suddenly felt painful again. Because of this crazy thinking, he was full of human weakness. Then he thought he was ridiculous again, what was so joyful, what was painful, what a man was, and because of these little emotions, he was suddenly happy and sad, stupid.
If he was like Fei Yujing, a handsome person who could deal with emotions at will, it would be great—
Buzzing.
The phone vibrated, his thoughts broke, he picked up the phone and saw that it was a text message sent by Fei Yujing, he was taken aback for a moment, and pointed out.
Fei Yujing: The nurse has left, can you come to the hospital to accompany me
Shi Jin's eyes widened, suspecting that he had hallucinations.
Can you come to the hospital to accompany me? Can? accompany
God, Fei Yujing could actually speak in this tone, Fei Yujing actually used the relatively weak word "accompanied", Fei Yujing... would take the initiative to ask him.
Doesn't that person always do a lot of things on his own, and then give you a brainstorm, not allowing you to refuse, and then leave unrestrainedly? Such a person would actually want someone to accompany him. Shouldn't such a person speak such a request with a command tone that cannot be denied? It's like calling Rongzhou Zhongshi.
Buzzing.
Another text message came in, still from Fei Yujing: The wound was a little painful.
Shi Jin made a meaningless "Ah", looking at the text message, trying to make up Fei Yujing's painful expression, but in the end he found nothing, was silent for a long time, and suddenly got up and walked quickly outside the hotel room.
"I actually went to watch the night for someone who had just argued this morning... I'm probably crazy!" He spit on himself, but his pace got faster.
…
Shi Jin almost ran to the hospital, and then intentionally stopped in the corridor outside the ward. After inhaling and exhaling several times, he calmly pushed open the ward door.
Fei Yujing was leaning on the hospital bed and closing his eyes to rest up his mind. He opened his eyes and looked over at the sound of the door opening, and asked, "Come here?"
Shi Jin's footsteps stiffened, his expression almost not stretched, and he retorted, "I came for a walk, and you didn't really want me to collect the body. You are not that important about what I run."
"From your hotel to here, if you don't run, you need to walk about fifteen minutes." Fei Yujing picked up the phone and looked at the time, and said, "I sent you a text message nine minutes ago."
"... Do you want to fight?" Shijin asked blankly.
Fei Yujing glanced at his messy hair that was blown by the wind. He didn't say anything if he saw it through. He raised his hand and patted the edge of the bed: "No, I can't beat you now. Come here and sit down."
Shi Jin: "..." Suddenly I understood why Rong Zhouzhong always wanted to beat Fei Yujing. He also wanted to beat the opponent very hard now.
Shi Jin stepped forward and took a seat, Fei Yujing poured him a glass of water, started talking, and asked, "Is there any good dinner?"
"Yes, the third brother always knows where there are delicious restaurants." Shi Jin replied stiffly, with a little bit of anger, and then after realizing that he was angered, his expression became more tense-really like a fool, Fei Yu Jing was indifferent over there, he was thinking wildly here, and being led by the nose by the other party, it was too stupid!
Be cold! He commanded himself in his heart.
"Still angry?" Fei Yujing asked.
"No!" Shi Jin second replied. He felt that he couldn't go on like this and he had to take back the initiative of the topic, so he immediately asked, "Isn't your wound hurt? Where is it? Call the doctor to come and see it?"
Fei Yujing replied: "I saw it, the doctor said that pain is normal, and wound healing requires a process."
Shi Jin glanced at his expression and the chest hidden by the hospital gown, and said, "Your expression doesn't look like it hurts at all."
"Then what kind of expression is painful." Fei Yujing rarely sold softly. "Actually, I'm already very patient now."
endure
Shi Jin was taken aback for a moment, then frowned, and carefully scanned his body, and finally found a trace of patience on his body-Fei Yujing's forehead seemed to be a little sweaty. With a move in his heart, he leaned over to look behind him, and he saw a trace of sweat on the hospital gown, and he couldn't help standing up.
Fei Yujing looked up at him and asked, "What's the matter? I think it's too boring to be with me and want to go back?"
"You said that if you are soft, you will lose a piece of meat or something? It hurts and sweats, and you still look like nothing. Have you forgotten how to mobilize your facial muscles?" Shi Jin frowned and held him down. His shoulder confirmed the condition of his back, and then turned to the bathroom to get a basin of warm water and motioned for him to turn his back side.
Fei Yujing glanced at him and obediently followed suit.
The clothes on his back have been half wet, and he should have endured the pain for a long time.
Shi Jin tightened his lips, immersed himself in taking out the towel and wringing it out, carefully uncovering his hospital gown. He saw a huge bruise on his waist and several scratches on his back. His fingers couldn't help it. Tight.
"Scared?" Fei Yujing asked, his tone still damn calm.
Shi Jin had the urge to hold on to his wound, making him yell out of the pain, pushing his head back with a dark face, carefully covering his back with a towel, helping him to wipe it up gently, and replied: "No. ."
Fei Yujing was honest for a while, and then asked: "Is that distressed?"
"I might as well love you a pig." Shijin retorted.
Fei Yujing was amused by his arrogant remarks, and said, "So you like pigs."
Isn’t it painful to be able to laugh
Shi Jin held his breath in his heart and couldn't help but mutter: "If you feel unwell, tell the doctor that you can prescribe some medicine and don't keep it on. When I came in the morning, you were still dealing with work. If you are injured, take a good rest. Take more rest to get better quickly. Can't work things be slowed down?"
Fei Yujing explained: "It's because of the pain that I want to use my work to divert my attention."
What the hell is this to divert attention. Shijin was really going to be pissed off by him, and said, "Then why are you sitting here?"
"Because the lung pain will get worse every night. At this time, work not only can't divert attention, but will cause work errors because of the inability to concentrate, so I can only stay like this." Fei Yujing replied, turning his head. "Thank you for coming with me, I feel much better."
"Should I be polite at this time, or should I praise your truthfulness?" Shijin threw the towel back into the basin and rubbed his head, glanced at him, resignedly gave up the idea of being angry with this person, and acted lightly. Carefully wiped off all the sweat on his body, paused for a long time, and whispered, "Actually... You can take the initiative to call me over, I'm very happy."
Fei Yujing turned a little to look at him.
Shijin threw the towel back into the basin again, got up and went to the closet to get another clean hospital gown, and handed it to him, "Let's change it."
Fei Yujing obediently did so again and said, "Thank you."
Shijin lost his temper. He compromised with himself and with him. He sat on the bedside, put on a posture of serious conversation, and said, "Second brother, I don't want to have some inexplicable fights with you anymore. You don't understand. , I’m a waste of anger. I thought about it and thought that we would be like this because there are some differences in the way of thinking between us. In order to prevent us from having meaningless quarrels, let’s get to know each other first, okay? ?"
It was the first time that Fei Yujing saw his gentle and mature tolerant appearance. He looked up and down carefully and replied, "Yes."
"Then brother, how do you manage your emotions wisely forever? I tried to understand what I was thinking like you did, but I found that it is too much to analyze my small emotions with a rational attitude. It’s too embarrassing to express some emotions honestly about the shame."
Fei Yujing shook his head: "I don't understand what you mean."
There is a reassuring thing about talking with Fei Yujing, that is, you never have to worry about what the other party is hiding or lying. Fei Yujing has always been honest when facing people close to him. He said that he did not understand, that is, he did not understand.
Shijin tried to change his mind and asked, "So, have you ever experienced any emotional or emotional aspects that are difficult to understand or ashamed to tell others what you are thinking? Or have you ever wanted to When avoiding what you think in your heart?"
Fei Yujing thought about it seriously this time, nodded and replied, "Yes."
Actually there is
"What is it?" Shijin asked, his eyes bright. It is impossible for a person who is always sane and sober to avoid self-evasion. From this point of view, Fei Yujing seems to be saved.
Fei Yujing glanced at him and asked, "Why do you want to know this?"
Because of curiosity.
Shijin cheekily replied, "Because I want to know you."
"I want to know you too." Fei Yujing answered, changing the subject without a trace, and asked, "Xiao Jin, what do you think of me?"
Shi Jin paused when he heard the words, and realized that he was grabbing control of the words, but he didn't say anything. He followed his words and replied: "I think you are a cold-blooded bastard."
Fei Yujing was surprised: "Cold-blooded?"
"It's not cold-blooded, it should be said that you feel like a robot. You can always control your emotions and feelings well, do whatever you want, and don't care much about what others think. Sometimes I admire you very much. , Occasionally I will envy you, and more often, I feel uneasy and fearful because of what you want to do and don’t care about."
Fei Yujing was stunned: "Uneasy and fearful?"
"Yes, anxiety and fear, and unwillingness." Shijin replied, sensibly and unreservedly for the first time, telling him the truest thoughts in my heart, "The relationship between you and me is always you Come as you want, leave as you want. You say you really treat me as a brother, but I dare not indulge myself to accept the care you give. In terms of emotions, I am used to going back and forth, and others treat me. Well, I will treat each other well, but only you, I dare not respond to the feelings you gave me, so I automatically ignored what you gave in my subconscious mind. Because I ignored it, I didn't need to respond."
Fei Yujing listened quietly, trying to understand his thoughts.
Shi Jin looked at his serious expression, and remembered what Rong Zhouzhong said at dinner that Fei Yujing was trying to cross the boundaries he had delineated and came to understand his thoughts. His heart softened, and suddenly he didn't feel that these The entangled thoughts in my heart said what was embarrassing or uncomfortable, and continued: "Second brother, when you use me as a tool, you are close to me simply. When I lose value, you abandon me and give up profitably. , Later we met again, because of various things, you suddenly really accepted my brother, all of which, I am passive. Your approach does not require my permission; your departure does not require Explain to me; your apology does not require my forgiveness; your compensation does not require my response. I am like a puppet playing with you. You treat me according to your mood, and how my own thoughts are, I You never care about your emotions. My will cannot determine your attitude and actions towards me."
Fei Yujing frowned slowly and asked, "Am I like this?"
"In my understanding, you are like this. You are right. What I want is your emotional need. I hope you need me."
Fei Yujing shook his head slowly: "Xiao Jin, I still don't understand. Do you mean that my concern for you has become a burden on you? This is not my intention. I don't ask you to forgive me. I don’t want to kidnap you emotionally. You are already too tired. What I have done to you is too cruel, and asking you to forgive me is too unfair to you."
Shi Jin was stunned and asked, "It is because of this that you said you didn't force my forgiveness?"
Fei Yu scenic spot head.
This is actually the case.
Shijin couldn't react a little bit. It was because he was afraid that he would be embarrassed, so he only apologized without asking for forgiveness. It’s not because of “I don’t want to think about your thoughts” or “Your thoughts are not important to me, I only do what I want to do” for more ego reasons... He raised his hand to cover his face, and he got a little bit of being The feeling of salvation.
"Xiao Jin?" Fei Yujing called him in doubt.
Shi Jinqian let out a sigh, looked at him and said, "Are you a fool."
Fei Yujing frowned, obviously disagreeing with his statement.
"Forget it, I'm an idiot who told you about this." Shijin suddenly didn't want to continue analyzing with him. He looked into his eyes and said directly, "Second brother, I'm upset because I don't know what you are doing to me. How deep is the feeling; I’m afraid because I’m afraid that you will retreat like before again; I’m not reconciled because I’m here because of your various behaviors and my mind is shaken, but you It seems that I will always be calm, sober and indifferent. I am afraid that I will persuade myself to open up, let go of the past, and am finally willing to open my heart for you again, but I will get the same ending as before."
When he said this, he stopped, stretched out his hand to hold Fei Yujing's shoulder, looked at his eyes and said one by one: "Second brother, you are too sensible, I am afraid that I will become a discarded product under your sensible balance again. .I hope you will also be shaken by my thoughts and emotions because of me, I hope you will be happy and painful because of my likes and dislikes to you, I think you care about me, afraid of losing me. I hope that if one day I disappear in your life Here, you will feel painful and sad. Only when you show that you care about me, I dare to get close to you again. The lesson last time was too profound, and I was scared."
Fei Yujing stared at him blankly, and for the first time tasted the taste of not knowing how to respond to other people's words.
"Second brother, I don’t need you to empathize with the pain I have suffered before, and you don’t need to feel guilty for this, and you don’t need to feel guilty for it. It’s hard, it’s great.” Shijin withdrew his hand, his tone eased, “This is all my thoughts, this is all my expectations of you, brother, if you really accept me as a younger brother, then this Will you cooperate with me this time, okay?"
Yes, that's it. There is no need to think about it. If you want something, you just want it. If you don't even want it, you can be more reconciled when you give up. Because he worked hard, so no matter what the final outcome is, he can accept it calmly.
Fei Yujing seemed to understand what he said, and it seemed that he did not understand. There was an unknown emotion rolling in his heart, which drove him to hold tightly to the courageous brother in front of him, who actively exposed his inner weakness, but habitually. Reason and soberness prevented him from acting.
You don't need to be guilty, but you need to be very concerned.
He felt like a stone was blocked in his heart, and some things wanted to break through the cage, but were suppressed by instinct.
No, you can't retract it anymore, Shijin has already taken the first step, and he can't let Shijin down anymore, he obviously provoked all this first.
"I... I'm a little anxious." He heard his own voice, with a hesitation he had never had before, "You asked me if I was ashamed to tell others what I was thinking in my heart. My answer is yes, I am a little anxious. , But I dare not tell you."
Shijin wondered: "What?"
"Seeing that you and the third and fifth are easing the relationship one by one, I'm... a bit anxious." After the first sentence was uttered, I wanted to say the following words. It seemed that it was no longer so difficult. "So after this car accident, I immediately realized that the opportunity was here."
Wait, chance? Shi Jin frowned slightly.
Fei Yujing slowly recovered her thoughts, and her tone calmed down a little bit: "When you were on the island, I found that you had a very affectionate attitude towards the fifth child and took good care of him... Not only him, but also the third child, old man. No matter the fourth, or even the big brother, you are close to them, dependent on, or caring about them. Only me, you have always been very kind to me."
Shi Jin gradually realized what he wanted to express, and his heart shrank unconsciously, and asked, "I'm very kind to you?"
"Yes, very polite." Fei Yujing replied, as if thinking of something, and added, "Not only are you polite, you are also very defensive of me. So I tried to touch you more, just like the third child did to you. , But your reaction to my contact is very ordinary."
Shijin thought of Fei Yujing's behavior of touching his head from time to time during this period, and his eyes widened slightly—is this actually intentional
Fei Yujing stretched out his hand and tapped his forehead lightly, and said, "It's like this... I find that your attitude towards me is like facing a friend who can only be regarded as an acquaintance, not repulsive, and not too close. So I am in a hurry. There is not much left for me to help Lian Jun. After these are over, I will only have fewer chances to meet you than now. What if everything is settled like this? I don’t want me. Become the only one among all the brothers who is so polite to you. Xiaojin, I want to be your brother, not your polite friend."
This time, I was speechless.
"I want to know why you are the only one who is so polite to me, so after the accident, I deliberately let the following news be more serious, trying to induce you to come. You really came, and I really felt guilty, so I took the opportunity to fight with me. You started the topic and wanted to understand what you were thinking, but I messed up. I even called the third child over deliberately, thinking that with him, the atmosphere should be lively and relaxed. If I get angry with you, he can still act for you. I coax you." Fei Yujing said all his calculations and asked, "Xiao Jin, I am a terrible brother, am I?"
"... No." Shi Jin shook his head, looking at the sober self-deprecation and vague self-loathing in his eyes, for a while, he was mixed feelings, and said: "You are not terrible... You are just... just too stupid, brother, why are you? Not so smart either."
The two brothers have been around for so long, what are they doing