I suddenly remembered the "Splashing Ink Gate", the magnificent pictures of mountains and rivers that Li Chengyin drew with Yanzhi and Luo Zidai, the Mingyufang, the Ta Ge that night, the sword, light and sword shadow that night... I remembered him breaking the sharp arrow and shouting I swear... I think of the real sword light and blood in my dream, I think of me singing on the sand dunes, I think of Gu Xiaowu catching a hundred fireflies for me, I think of the cold wind on the Forgotten River... And I swayed by myself When the knife cut off the belt, the pained look on his face... I dropped the pen and hurriedly buried myself in the quilt again, I was afraid that I would remember.
Yong Niang thought I was still uncomfortable, so she patted my back gently, like coaxing a child to sleep, and patted me slowly.
A'Du walked away gently, even though her voice was soft, I could still hear it.
I suddenly felt sad. I didn't even dare to ask A'Du, Turkic, or those things in the past. Are the things I remembered in my dreams real? A'Du must be more sad than me. She is obviously a Turk, but she has always been with me, accompanied me to the Central Plains, accompanied me with the enemy for so long... I have become more cowardly than ever, and I don't want to know anything anymore. .
I slept for a long time in a daze, and at night, Yong Niang woke me up and made me drink a very bitter concoction.
Then Yong Niang asked me, what would I like to eat.
I shook my head, I didn't want to eat anything.
What can I eat now
Yong Niang still ordered people to make soup cakes. She said, "The soup cakes are soft and full of soup. It is very good for sick people to eat them." I didn't want to eat soup cakes, so I picked a chopstick and put it down.
The soup cake reminds me of Li Cheng Yin.
In fact, everything in the East Palace reminds me of Li Cheng Yin.
I just don't want to think about him anymore. Whether it was true or not, I instinctively didn't want to see him again.
But there is no way to avoid it. When Li Cheng Yin came to see me, Yong Niang just took the soup cake away, and he walked in with a smile on his face, just like before. Only I know that everything is different from before. We have such an unbearable past. The Shenshui of Wangchuan made me forget everything, and he also made him forget everything. And I was in a daze, and spent three years here with him... Before I could finish thinking, Li Cheng Yin walked quickly to my bed, and reached out to touch my forehead.
I turned my face away.
His hand felt empty, but he didn't get angry, but said: "You finally woke up, I'm really worried." I looked at him silently, as if looking at a stranger. He finally felt that something was wrong and asked me: "What's wrong with you?" Seeing that I ignored him, he said: "You were kidnapped by the assassins that day, and it was Shangyuan, and the nine gates opened..." I just feel like saying no out of impatience. I have long since forgotten the way he stood on the tower that day, but the way I stood on the Forgotten River that day, I am afraid that I will remember it for the rest of my life. What's the use of talking about it now? Does he still want to lie to me again with sweet words? He just forgot everything from the past, but I remember it, I already remember it!
He said: "... I haven't seen you in the city for several days, I thought... "He said, his voice slowly lowered, "I thought I would never see you again..." He stretched out his hand to touch my shoulder , I think of my father's blurred tears, I think of A-Niang lying in a pool of blood, I think of Aon's last shout, I think of He Shi pushing me on the horse's back with his blood-stained hands... I suddenly pulled out the golden hairpin , and stabbed him hard in the chest.
I tried my best at that moment, but he never thought that I would suddenly stab him, so he was stunned. It was not until the last moment that he instinctively stretched out his hand to cover his chest. Blood slowly poured out of his palm, he stared at me blankly, the look in his eyes was so complicated that I couldn't understand, as if I didn't believe that I did such a thing.
In fact, I don't believe it myself, I pressed my chest and felt like I was shaking.
After a long time, he actually grabbed the golden hairpin and pulled it out. He pulled out extremely fast, and he didn't even snort, just frowned slightly, like it wasn't his own flesh and blood at all. Blood poured out immediately, and I watched the blood flow like a stream, running down his wrist all the way to the sleeve of his robe, and the dark red blood was like a sinuous snake, slowly crawling onto the fabric. He held the golden hairpin that was still dripping blood and looked at me, and I suddenly felt panic in my heart, as if I couldn't breathe.
He threw the golden hairpin on the ground, there was a soft sound of "clang", the amethyst necklaces adorned on the golden hairpin scattered, and Ding Ding Dongdong jumped to the ground. His voice was light and faint, as if he was afraid of disturbing something, and asked, "Why?" The various grievances between me and him are separated by a sea of blood-like hatred. It turns out that forgetting is not misfortune, but real luck. Like him, it would be great to forget everything in the past.
I deceived myself and turned my face away, but he said: "I see." I don't know what he knew, but his voice seemed to have a faint chill: "I didn't want to ask you, because you are so sick. But since this is the case. , I can't help but ask, how did you escape from the assassin? It was A'Du who came back with you, how to ask her, she also refused to tell the whereabouts of the assassin, let alone where she saved you. It's your people from Xiliang, I can't torture you. But you have to tell me who ordered the assassination... "I looked at this man, the man who fell into oblivion with me, he has forgotten everything. But I will never forget, I will never forget that he killed Aon, I will never forget that he ruined my family, I will never forget, I will never go back to Xiliang. I opened my mouth and made no sound, I just looked at him almost mockingly. He actually came to ask me who the assassin was? Does he not know who the assassin is? Or did he forget Gu Jian after he fell into Wangchuan
I looked at him, he looked at me, and after a long time, he suddenly threw a pair of jade pendants in front of me. I stared at the pair of mutton jade pendants. I recognized this pair of jade pendants. I used to wait for three days and three nights on the sand dunes with them. At that time, he was still called Gu Xiaowu; at that time, I was happily waiting for the sweetheart I thought; at that time he held this pair of jade pendants in his hand and smiled narrowly at me; at that time, in the desert of Xiliang King City Outside, there is the purest night sky, and I am with him, riding back to the royal city.
Back then, neither of us were as hideous as we are now. I am still the carefree Ninth Princess from Xiliang, and he is Gu Xiaowu from the Central Plains.
Li Cheng Yin's hand was still bleeding, he grabbed my arm, and it hurt my bones. He forced me to look up and look me straight in the eyes, he asked, "Why?" He asked again, why.
I also want to know why, why does fate play tricks on us, and force the two of us into such a decisive past time and time again. I looked into his eyes, his eyes turned out to be indescribable pain, with the last glimmer of hope, as if he was expecting me to say something.
I opened my mouth, but said nothing.
The blood on his hand smeared on my face, it was warm and didn't show any temperature, he said, "Why did you come back from the assassin unharmed, why did A'Du refuse to tell me the whereabouts of the assassin, why did your hand come back safe and sound? There will be such a pair of mandarin ducks... mandarin ducks mandarin ducks... I broke up your pair of mandarin ducks, right? "The strength of his hand made my shoulders hurt, and I suddenly felt disheartened. Above Wangchuan, is he hugging him? What kind of state of mind did you jump with me? Is it just to say that to me? That Central Plains dialect that I don't understand at all? I had long forgotten what that sentence was about. I only remember Pei Zhao's exclamation at the end, he must be horrified too. After all, Li Chengyin is not Gu Xiaowu, but my Gu Xiaowu has already died in the chaos of the army. I finally raised my eyes to look at him, his eyes were dark, and my shadow was reflected in them. Who is he? Is that Gu Xiaowu who caught fireflies for me? Or the lover who left me at the wedding? Or, on the top of Wangchuan, watching me cut the belt decisively, could the remorse on his face be true
I have been cheated by this man time and time again, until now, who knows if he is cheating on me? He swore an oath to the assassin, Broken Arrow, and said it so plausibly, but in a blink of an eye, he was standing with Zhao Liangdi at the Chengtian Gate... My Gu Xiaowu was already dead, and when I thought about it, my heart was just like a knife. My voice was broken, so terrifying that it didn't look like my own. I said: "You broke us up, you broke up me—and Gu Xiaowu." He was stunned, and after a while, he smiled contemptuously: "Gu Xiaowu?" The blood was still gurgling down to the bottom of the robe. When I was above the Forgotten River, my heart felt like ashes, but at this moment, I didn't even have the strength to struggle. I felt extremely tired and exhausted. I said word by word, "You killed Gu Xiaowu." My Gu Xiaowu, the only person I ever loved, was killed by him just like that. Killed by him in the Turks, killed by him on our unfinished wedding, killed by him in Xiliang.
I was confused, forgot everything in the past, and then came here to marry Li Chengyin. And he-I forgot everything, I didn't even know that Gu Xiaowu was dead.
He laughed angrily: "Good! Good! Very good!" BS.JOOYoo.NET He didn't look at me again, turned around and left.
When Yong Niang came back, she was very surprised and said, "Why did Your Highness leave?" Immediately she exclaimed, "Oh, why is there so much blood on the ground..." He asked Gong E to come in to wipe the blood, and then asked me what was wrong. What happened, I didn't want her to know, and let her toss and toss me numbly. What should I do? Can I go back to Xiliang? Even if he returned to Xiliang, Gu Xiaowu was already dead.
Yong Niang thought I was tired and going to sleep, so she didn't ask any further questions. She asked A'Du to come in and sleep with me, and A'Du still slept on the thick felt in front of my bed.
But I couldn't fall asleep. I got up, and A'Du got up immediately, and poured me a cup of tea, she thought I was going to drink water.
Instead of taking the tea from her hand, I took her hand and wrote in her palm.
I asked her, shall we go back to Xiliang
Adu nodded.
I feel very at ease, wherever I go, she will go with me. I don't even know that she has suffered so much before, and I don't know how she came here with me willingly. I took her hand and suddenly burst into tears. A'Du saw me cry, and immediately panicked. She wiped my tears with her sleeve, and I wrote in her palm, don't worry. However, A'Du seemed very sad. She hugged me in her arms and slowly stroked my hair, just like stroking a child. She comforted me like this, and I slowly closed my eyes.
In fact, I knew in my heart that I was finished. In the past, I liked Gu Xiaowu, but after I forgot everything, I liked Li Chengyin again. Even if he lied to me again and again, I still love him.
The water of forgetting river lies in forgetting love. Anyone who has been immersed in the divine water will completely forget the troubles they have experienced. I forgot him, he also forgot me, the two of us, no more entanglements. But why did I fall in love with him again after forgetting everything? He's never been good to me, but I just like him. In the past three years, we pushed each other away time and time again, but why did we still come to this day? The gods once listened to my prayers and made me forget all the pains and troubles he inflicted on me, but is God punishing me like today? Let me remember everything again, after falling in love with him again.
Li Cheng Yin never came to see me again.
I had been sick for a long time, and when I was able to speak again, the magnolia flowers outside the eaves had already withered away, and the cherry blossoms in the atrium were already blooming like pink and rosy clouds.
Cherry blossoms are earlier than peach and plum trees, so as soon as cherry blossoms bloom, you feel that spring has come. A few cherry blossom trees in the courtyard are covered in pavilions, blooming with radiant flowers, clustered in clusters, like a light gauze of flowing clouds, clustered under the eaves, and a few branches even come into the window.
A lot of things happened when I was sick, all of which Yong Niang told me. First, the first assistant, Ye Cheng, was impeached for selling officials, and then it was heard that the ties were widespread, and everyone in the DPRK was in danger, lest they be counted as "Ye Dang". Then, Pei Kuang, the cavalry general who conquered Goryeo, returned to court, and His Majesty rewarded him with a lot of gold and silver. There is also a concubine in His Majesty's new book, who is very young and beautiful, and is called "Niangzi" in the palace. It is said that His Majesty loves her very much, and even Gao Guifei, who temporarily photographed the sixth palace, is dwarfed. Everyone was discussing whether His Majesty would appoint her as a queen, because such a favor is really rare. Whether it’s court affairs or affairs in the palace, I listen to it in my left ear and hear it out in my right ear, so I forget it.
I am also impatient to hear these things. I feel that the kindness of men is unreliable, especially the men of the imperial family. In front of the world, what is a woman? Gu Jian once said that if a person wants to be an emperor, he will inevitably be hard-hearted and cold-blooded. I think what he said was right.
In the afternoon, it suddenly started to rain. Yong Niang looked at Yu Si in the courtyard and sighed softly, and said, "The flowers are going to be bad now." Although I have recovered from my illness, I have a cough. Not much effect. So as soon as I coughed, Yong Niang hurriedly took a cloak and put it on me, refusing to let me feel a little cold. I also hope that the cough will be better sooner, so that I can go back to Xiliang with A'Du sooner.
No matter what my Xiliang becomes, I will go back after all.
I sat in front of the window and looked at the cherry blossoms in the rain. The delicate petals were beaten and drooped, like silk that was cut to pieces, slowly soaked by the rain and stuck to the branches. Yong Niang had already ordered people to erect a brocade, which is what the noble family in the Central Plains used to protect flowers, and put up a brocade on the flower tree, so that the rain could not destroy the flower tree. I looked at the cherry blossoms under the brocade, and there were tiny golden bells hanging around the brocade, which were used to drive away birds. The golden bells swayed slightly by the wind, and a faint bell rang.
Now I often stay in a daze for a long time, and Yong Niang feels like I have changed. I used to be too noisy, but now I am so quiet, she always looks at me very worried.
A'Du was also very worried about me. She wanted to take me out to play more than once, but I couldn't get my spirits up. I didn't tell A'Du that I remembered things from the past. I think some things, I just have to bear them by myself.
When the cherry blossoms faded, the weather warmed up completely. The palace has changed new clothes, and the East Palace has also changed into thin spring shirts, and it will be early summer in a few days. Yong Niang asked someone to build a new swing in the atrium. I used to like swinging very much, but Li Cheng Yin thought it was frivolous, so there was never a swing in the East Palace, and now Yong Niang asked people to make a new swing for me. One, but I don't play that at all now.
I saw Pei Zhao when I was putting on the swing. I haven't seen him for a long time. I haven't seen him since he persuaded me not to interact with Yueniang on the road last time. It was like the first time I saw him, I still remember him taking A'Du's knife, and I still remember his horrified voice above Wang Chuan. He must not know, I have already remembered it all.
I'm not going to tell him that I remembered the past, so he would definitely be on guard against me. People from the Central Plains will deceive people like that. I have to learn a little bit. I have to hide from them, so that I can find an opportunity to go with A’Du.
Pei Zhao brought me some things. Those were gifts from the palace. It is said that they were the trophies of Goryeo captured by Pei Kuang, the general of the cavalry. His Majesty gave them to many people, and I also have a copy here.
They are all antique jewelry, I have never been interested in such things, I just ordered Yong Niang to receive them.
There was also a basket, which Pei Zhao personally held in his hand and presented it to me.
I didn't answer, I only ordered Yong Niang to open it, it turned out to be a kitten, but the size of a fist, with snow-white fluff all over her body, like a pink rabbit. But it's a cat, but the eyes are blue and blue, which is very interesting. It crouched at the bottom of the box and cried softly.
I asked: "This is also conferred by His Majesty?" Pei Zhao said: "This is captured by the father of the last commander. It is said that it is a tribute from Siam. The younger brothers and sisters in the family are naughty and will not be raised very much. The commander will give it to the crown princess." I picked up the kitten, it crouched in my palm and wailed, sticking out its little pink tongue and licking my fingers. The soft and numb feeling brushed against my fingers. It was uncomfortable and comfortable. I fell in love with this kitten immediately, so I smiled and said to Pei Zhao: "Then thank Old General Pei for me." I don't know why, I feel Pei Zhao seemed to be relieved. I looked at him without hesitation and smiled. Back then when he followed Li Chengyin on the westward expedition, he knew everything about it. On the cliff of Wangchuan, he also watched me jump off. But he never missed a word in front of me. I think he was actually loyal to Li Chengyin. If he knew that I had already remembered it, would he immediately change his expression and be more wary of me? These tricks of the Central Plains people, I will learn bit by bit, and I will repay all the pain they inflicted on me.