Yi Mo hugged him for a while, then withdrew from Ji Jiu's body, silently wiped off the stains on the two of them, took the clean robes, changed them for Ji Jiu, put them on, then lowered his eyes, and did not do anything else Conceal it, and say what you think: "When you pulled me to hug me, I thought you were Shen Qingxuan."
He said again: "Ji Jiu and Shen Qingxuan are the same in my eyes."
After hearing this, Ji Jiu was neither sad nor happy. He knew that he was dead, completely dead from this incident, so it felt like a big hole had been opened in his heart, and air was convecting through the hole.
Perhaps it was because Ji Jiu was completely dead, so Ji Jiu lay quietly, thinking about her own problems. He had many doubts, about Ji Jiu, about Shen Qingxuan, about Yi Mo, about Shen Jue, about this past life and this life, Ji Jiu once spent a lot of energy thinking, thinking, and understanding. However, maybe he has been dragged into the vortex and cannot escape, Ji Jiu knows that no matter how much he thinks, it is still not thorough enough.
It finally works today.
Ji Jiu is dead.
The resentful Ji Jiu, the desperate Ji Jiu, the knowing Ji Jiu, the pity Ji Jiu, the retreating Ji Jiu, the quietly excited Ji Jiu...all annihilated.
Perhaps, he didn't die from the phrase 'Shen Qingxuan', nor did he die from Yi Mo's hands.
Ji Jiu knew that he died at the hands of himself who knew there was no hope but secretly hoped. That sentence, that name, was just the straw that broke the camel's back.
From the moment his heart beat, Ji Jiu was already on the road to death. Today, however, the dust has settled.
Ji Jiu doesn't have any complaints, she still does what she knows she shouldn't do, she likes it when she knows she shouldn't, and of course she has to welcome the ending calmly.
The dead Ji Jiu jumped out of the vortex and stood far away on the shore, looking at the black hole that could swallow people's hearts.
Devastated everywhere, inexplicable gunpowder filled the air. This is the real scene inside for so long.
Obviously they all want to be kind to each other, but they don't know why, no one can do it.
After a long time, Ji Jiu finally spoke with a sigh.
"Yi Mo, we used to spend a lot of time together. But you never talked about Shen Qingxuan, you never talked about your past life, and even in the first days, you didn't explain yourself to me except that you came to me every night to do this bed thing. It came from my previous life. Why?"
He seems to be just a random question, just curious, just puzzled. Even though Yi Mo knew that he wouldn't say useless words, he didn't think about it, he was used to it, and when facing Shen Qingxuan, he didn't think about it, as long as he accepted it calmly.
Yi Mo said, "I don't want to say it."
"Why don't you want to say it?" Ji Jiu asked. After a moment of silence, he conjectured: "Afraid that I will laugh at you? Sympathy? Rejection?"
Yi Mo thought about it carefully, and indeed at the beginning, he had many opportunities to tell him that perhaps he would not get such strong resistance. But the timing wasn't right the first night, so it wasn't said. Later, he knelt and kowtowed in front of him, obviously so sad and angry, even he himself was so wronged, but he still didn't say anything. Later, Ji Jiu knew that resistance was useless, he didn't even have any resistance, and when he was allowed to do whatever he wanted, he didn't say anything. Even... until now, it has not been clearly discussed.
Why not? Why not explain? Why not tell him
Yi Mo thought for a long time, finally hesitated, and said: "I don't know, I just don't want to say."
Can speak, but don't want to speak. Can explain, can ease the initial confrontation, but don't do it.
Ji Jiu asked softly, "Is it because I treat you badly?"
Yi Mo didn't expect him to ask such a question, and was stunned on the spot.
Ji Jiu couldn't wait for the answer, so she sat up, forced her to look into his eyes, and repeated: "Is it because I'm not good to you?"
Emma didn't speak.
"So, you will only say your favorite name when I treat you well and are willing to lie under you. When I treat you badly, you never say it." Ji Jiu asked: "Yes It's not like this?"
"Because you think that only the person who treats you well and likes you is the Shen Qingxuan you want."
"Those who treat you badly and reject you, even if you hug him and keep saying the same thing, but in fact, in your heart, you don't recognize him as Shen Qingxuan, not the one you like!"
"Really?" Ji Jiu asked seriously.
Yimo is still silent.
In his silence, Ji Jiu understood. Maybe there are still many things, he is still at a loss, but at least at this moment, Ji Jiu knows that he has grasped part of the truth.
Ji Jiu straightened his clothes, and asked, "I've checked everything about the past. If I don't check, when are you going to tell me?"
Yi Mo also didn't know how to answer this question. He remained silent, sitting aside.
"Shen Jue told me before that you didn't even become a demon at first out of your own will. It was a Taoist who tricked you into blackmailing you once before you became a demon. All demons want to become immortals, so you Just cultivating immortals. It’s been two thousand years now. Yi Mo, can I say that,” Ji Jiu paused, “For these two thousand years, you haven’t done anything you wanted to do, because you have nothing to do. Isn’t that right? ?”
Ji Jiu shook his head: "Shen Jue said that your relationship with Shen Qingxuan was almost forced by his father. Therefore, it is Shen Qingxuan who insisted on being with you, so you are with him, right?"
Regarding this paragraph, Yi Mo nodded and admitted, "Yes."
Ji Jiu rubbed his forehead and felt that he had a headache.
It's really painful, full of helpless pain.
Ji Jiu said: "A monster like you should go to cultivate immortality. Because you really have nothing to ask for in this world, but you were pulled into the world of mortals by my previous life." After a short pause, he said: "It is precisely because you have nothing to ask for That's why you were easily dragged into the world of mortals by me in the previous life... Perhaps, he was too kind to you, so good that he let you know that there are such things in this world, so you have desires."
"But your desire is extremely selfish." Ji Jiu smiled: "Because you only want to treat Shen Qingxuan well."
Yi Mo frowned, thought for a while and asked, "What's the difference?"
Ji Jiu looked into his eyes and said seriously: "If you liked my past life and kept looking for it, you should face me in this life. You know that Ji Jiu in front of you is Shen Qingxuan, and you should accept all his good and bad " After a pause, Ji Jiu grabbed his hand, "But until today, as long as you father and son treat me well, what about mine? Isn't it Shen Qingxuan?"
Clamping that hand tightly, Ji Jiu no longer allowed him to escape, Ji Jiu raised the volume and asked, "So, do you like Shen Qingxuan, or do you like Shen Qingxuan for your good?!"
Yi Mo lowered his head, looked at the interlocking hands of the two, looked at them for a long time, then raised his head, and said calmly: "You know that you are the reincarnation of Shen Qingxuan, so you have pity, then you are willing to lie under me Is it because you like me, or because you like my feelings for Shen Qingxuan?" After a pause, fearing that he didn't understand clearly enough, Yi Mo added: "Do you like me as a monster? Or do you like me? This monster's pursuit of Shen Qingxuan Love? Have you distinguished among them?"
Ji Jiu was stunned for a moment, and the two looked at each other with confusion in their eyes.
Do you like that person, or do you like that feeling. In other words, fall in love with him, or fall in love with the love he gave.
Yi Mo was still asking, "Do you like me, Ji Jiu, or Shen Qingxuan's reincarnation, can you tell the difference?"
Just such a sentence from him almost dragged Ji Jiu on the shore into the whirlpool again.
Ji Jiu, who seemed to be in a dead end, suddenly woke up with a jolt. What Yi Mo said was reasonable, and his pursuit of Shen Qingxuan really moved him, but if he didn't have the slightest liking, how could he do so much bad things to him? after things. Still here, lingering with him, talking to him.
Ji Jiu nodded, and replied sonorously: "I can tell the difference." He also admitted invisibly that even though he has gone through so much, he still likes him.
"It's you who can't tell," Ji Jiu said, "You want Shen Qingxuan to be good, but you don't want Shen Qingxuan to be bad. Don't you know that it doesn't matter whether Shen Qingxuan is good or not?"
Ji Jiu said that he became powerless, and he didn't know whether he hated iron but felt sympathetic to the two people in this game. I just feel powerless.
Falling back on the bed, Ji Jiu rested his weak arms on his face, almost pleading: "Please, if you still want to find Shen Qingxuan in the next life, please take the initiative. Do something proactively, and you can kill him if you kidnap him." It’s okay, if he rejects you, you can strangle him to death. If he doesn’t accept you, you can chase him and keep explaining until he goes crazy... It’s okay, don’t be so passive and do nothing, wait for everything Shen Qingxuan does it. If he can live for a thousand years, he will be used to you for a thousand years, but he can only live for such a short time, how can he spoil you inexplicably every life! Besides, if you don't accept his badness, so what? In exchange for his kindness to you?"
What he said was extremely helpless and angry, Yi Mo lowered his body, put his arms around his shoulders, and rubbed his arms into his arms. He really didn't know how to distinguish Ji Jiu from Shen Qingxuan, even if he had successfully identified them before, and knew who spoke angrily. The person is Ji Jiu, Shen Qingxuan will never be angry with him. But now... what's the difference
Yi Mo could almost imagine his mood. Sure, never had a good time.
However, even if he was unhappy like this, in the end, he still fell in love with himself.
Even though Shen Qingxuan's method has always been different, what's the difference between such a patient and tolerant mind
And why, it's not "inexplicably pampering you".
Yi Mo hugged him, thinking quietly for a long time. He likes this kind of Ji Jiu, that is, he likes this kind of reincarnation of Shen Qingxuan. Also, he likes this good.
Yi Mo said: "You care so much, my name is Shen Qingxuan, not you?"
Ji Jiu opened his eyelids, wondering how he could still ask such a question: "I have a lot of things to do, things that Shen Qingxuan in this life must do, how can I just be your Shen Qingxuan?"
"Then if you don't have to do these things, will you be my Shen Qingxuan?" Yi Mo asked.
Ji Jiu let out a "huh": "I don't know if it is possible, but at least, I will let you pay back all the debts you owed me at the beginning before letting you go."
"Then what do you care about?" Yi Mo said, "What's the difference between my calling you Shen Qingxuan and Ji Jiu? You don't deny that you are Shen Qingxuan."
Ji Jiu sighed:
"Because I know that you don't call me Ji Jiu because you don't like Ji Jiu who has been treating you badly for so long. If you like me, why not call me Shen Qingxuan? That was also my previous life .”
"But Shen Jue also said that I don't deserve to be his father."
Ji Jiu laughed "hehe", thinking of that fight with Shen Jue, he found his empty heart ached again, and said slowly: "Because I'm not good, so I don't deserve to be his father... You all said in unison Ji Jiu Jiu is Shen Qingxuan, but when Ji Jiu treats you badly, he calls unworthy and separates Ji Jiu and Shen Qingxuan."
"Maybe, it's not necessarily because you don't accept me." Ji Jiu said lightly, remembering the moment when Shen Jue pointed at him with a sword. At that time, he asked, if I were Shen Qingxuan, would you use your sword against me?
No, it won't. So for so long, who really treated him as Shen Qingxuan and gave him the same respect and care? Accept his good and his bad.
nothing. While he was working hard to accept them, because he didn't do well enough, he got the only result.
Ji Jiujue's eyes were a little sore, as if something was about to flow out, he quickly closed his eyes, and said nothing, he died at the hands of his "bad" self.
Yi Mo was speechless.
Maybe Ji Jiu is right, never talking about the past, never saying to Ji Jiu "I like your past life, so I come to look for your present life", maybe it is indeed subconsciously rejecting the bad side of herself.
But these, Yimo never thought about it. It was the first time he heard him say that. Silent for the first time. Not knowing what is real.
He didn't know if it was true what Ji Jiu said: he likes Shen Qingxuan, but he is limited to Shen Qingxuan who only likes the side that treats him well. So, who exactly is Shen Qingxuan? Not good, isn't it Shen Qingxuan
In this short period of time, Yi Mo didn't have the possibility to think clearly, so Yi Mo hugged him and asked himself in the quiet passing time: If it was the first time, what should I do on my own initiative. Isn't it, it won't reach the point where it is today
Ji Jiu had already had a splitting headache, and couldn't bear it any longer, so he muttered: "I'll go by myself at dawn, I won't see you off." She fell asleep completely.
Yi Mo hugged him, responded in a low voice, and didn't say anything else, just hugged him like this, sticking to each other, feeling the heart in the other's chest, beating on her body.
After Ji Jiu drank all night to vent, just like that, she fell asleep quietly.
He slept deeply, the sky was getting brighter, and he didn't even know that Yi Mo had left.