This ice-sculpted championship trophy means a lot to him, but to me it's just a... paperweight.
This is his glory, his youth. I like stars, but what I like is the stars that are studded in the night sky, out of reach and unable to be captured by me. Not like this embedded in the base, exaggerated shape, dazzling decorations...
I shouldn't have.
"Do you want it?"
Shang Muxiao bent over because he wanted to show me the star on the pedestal, his face was so close to me that I could even smell the tobacco smell in his hair without any effort.
Maybe because of the competition, he didn't wear studs on his right ear today, the tiny black mole was particularly conspicuous, dangling in front of my eyes, shaking my mind more than the diamond stars on the base.
My fingertips curled up slightly, and I raised the corners of my lips stiffly at him: "Thank you, you've been careful."
His expression softened suddenly, and his smile was mixed with a little pride: "I knew you would like it."
Then you are amazing, I didn't even know I would like it.
Shang Muxiao and I had a big chat about tonight's game. When the Six-Eyed Demon God rolled over, there was no fear on his face, only full of excitement. He loves the sport and the adrenaline rush of walking on a tightrope.
Thinking of the night he took me to watch the stars in the mountains, he jumped on the narrow viewing platform despite the danger, which seems incomprehensible to me, but in his opinion, this may be normal, the pursuit of "excitement".
"Why are you still hanging around here, aren't you going to drink?" The box door was pushed open again, and Zhou Yanyi swaggered in, his yellow hair was particularly eye-catching.
He saw Yin Nuo at the bar for the first time, smiled and grabbed the wine glass in his hand, drank the sparkling wine in one gulp, and then looked towards the floor-to-ceiling window.
"Pfft!" Then he spat out the wine in his mouth in shock.
He was choking, his face flushed red, Yin Nuo hurriedly handed him a tissue, he took it and covered his mouth, bent over and couldn't stop coughing.
"You're so dirty." It was clear that the distance was still far away, but Shang Muxiao seemed to have caught the foam sprayed by the other party.
Zhou Yanyi coughed and looked here, looking at Shang Muxiao for a while, and me again for a while.
After finally stopping the cough, he said to Shang Muxiao before saying, "You guys..."
The content omitted later really makes people imagine a lot.
I was about to tell him that we didn't have anything, but found that he didn't look at me at all, just looked at Shang Muxiao with a speechless and unexpected expression.
"real or fake?"
The combination of me and Shang Muxiao seemed to him even more incredible than the end of the world.
Just now, Shang Muxiao was still in a bright mood, just like a sunny day in the spring. Now, facing the questioning of his friend, he seems to have changed his personality completely, and his tone is cold and impatient.
"To shut up."
Zhou Yanyi raised his eyebrows, but he was not angry. Instead, he made a zipper action to his mouth.
"Okay, aren't you going to celebrate? I booked a place early in the morning, let's go now, I haven't had dinner yet..." Yin Nuo stepped forward and said to the court.
"Is it the one from last time? Order now, you can eat it right away when you arrive, and I'm hungry too." Zhou Yanyi hooked his shoulders and walked out, putting his head on his mobile phone, "Order this meat, I like tender meat. The... not spicy, I don't like spicy... nor lamb..."
Yin Nuo threw the phone to him directly: "You're so annoying, order it yourself."
The door slowly closed, leaving only me and Shang Muxiao in the room.
He swept away the gloom before, his tone became light again, and he asked, "Are you going to go together?"
I looked at the time, it was already eleven o'clock.
"No, it's too late, I have class tomorrow." And it's too strange.
It was strange to accept his trophy, and to go to a celebratory dinner with him and his friends, I don't think it's right to think about it.
"Is it late at eleven o'clock?" He walked towards the door. Although he said so, he didn't mean to force me, "Forget it, then you can go back to rest."
He opened the door and held it back with his body, like a dedicated doorman in a five-star hotel, and made a "please" gesture to me.
I thanked him in a low voice and left the box.
He sent me downstairs, I saw him in his racing suit, and I thought he should have to change, so I let him leave me alone.
"It's so dark." He glanced at the dark surroundings outside and said, "I'll take you to the car."
The racetrack is built in the countryside and is very remote. Except for a few towering searchlights in the square, this point is still working, and there is almost no other light source. Black is a little darker, but it's not that you can't see it.
The parking lot is at least 500 meters away from the exit. It doesn't take me much time to speed up my wheelchair. It takes ten minutes to take care of his speed when I walk down with him.
"No, Yin Nuo and the others are still waiting for you. I'll just find a car myself."
Shang Muxiao didn't even look at me, put his hands in his pockets, and walked outside. As long as he made up his mind, it seemed that he didn't need anyone's approval to do anything.
I stared at his back, really displeased, and seeing him walking further and further away, I could only call out to him.
"left."
Hearing the words, he retreated as if nothing had happened, and walked to the right again.
One after the other, walking slowly. The night was already cold, and the suburbs were sparsely populated, and it was a bit cooler.
"Are you drinking?" Shang Muxiao asked.
"drink."
"Are you drinking enough?"
"good."
For alcohol, my metabolism is surprisingly good, and I haven't been drunk yet. One year, I went to a different place to attend a seminar and organized a dinner after the meeting. The professor of another school did not like us coming to Qingwan University because the school ranking was lower than ours every year. One cup at a time to persuade you to drink.
The dean of the department, Dong Li, used to be my teacher, and I am his favorite student. He has always been very protective of me. He didn't let me drink it at first, so he almost vomited. Afterwards, I couldn't really see it, so I directly competed with the professor one-on-one, and finally managed to drink the other party under the table and won a big victory. Since then, there have been rumors that I am not drunk after a thousand cups.
"I can't see it." Shang Muxiao tilted his head to look behind him, "I thought you were the kind of person who is extremely restrained and doesn't drink a drop of alcohol."
"'Restriction' means knowing where your limits are and being able to stop in time, not suppressing your desires."
His eyes wandered on my face for a moment, then looked back forward: "So you will still be restrained."
"Everyone should exercise restraint."
"I don't like it, I hate restraining myself." In the night, his voice was particularly low, but not inaudible, "Whatever I want, I must get it. The limit is there, but I will not Stop. I'm going to rush past it."
Not everyone has the courage to challenge the limit, and not everyone dares to indulge their desires. When Shang Muxiao said the words "I want to rush over and surpass it", if I just envied him a little before, then from this moment on, I started to envy him.
Jealous of his rashness, jealous of his arrogance, jealous of his dazzling, living life that serves infinite instinct.
I clearly know that I can't be a person like him, and jealousy or envy can't change my established outlook on life, but it doesn't prevent me from feeling that he is... shining.
This is probably the young man. Rubbing the hard edges and corners of the trophy in my arms with my fingertips, I thought with some self-deprecation, if reminiscing about youth is a precursor to aging, then I will probably age prematurely.
Shang Muxiao took me to the side of the car and put the trophy in the passenger seat for me. As I drove away, he stood on the side of the road watching me silently.
After driving some distance and then looking in the rearview mirror, he was still standing in the same position.
When I got home, I searched around and couldn't find a suitable place, so I had to put the paperweight... trophy given to me by Shang Muxiao on the bookshelf, to accompany my collection of books.
Before going to bed, I clicked on the mobile app and found the work chat group of our department. After hesitating for a while, I typed a line and sent it out.
I found that Bergson's concept of intuition might be right, instinct is naturally superior to reason.
As soon as these words came out, the quiet work group instantly exploded.
Socrates Down Dog: ? ? ? Brother North? ? Brother Bei, if you are kidnapped, just blink!
Descartes Wannianhei: Congratulations for abandoning the dark to the bright, the concept of traditional rationalism is inherently flawed, and a high degree of objectivity does not exist.
Descartes Wannianhei: Wait, Arabidopsis? Are you a mustard? ? ? Are you crazy? ? Are you and Director Dong not staunch supporters of rationalism
Qingwan Aristotle: ... disciple! ! You haven't appeared in ten thousand years, so when you appear, do you give the teacher such a big surprise
Anti-Rational Pioneer: Director, you are the last of the rationalists of Qingwan University.
Socrates Down Dog: Waxing.
Qingwan Aristotle: Weep! !
I ignored the discussions in the group, and exited the software and went to sleep with peace of mind.
The next morning, when I turned on my phone again, I found a lot of news. There are the recent updates of the puppy sent to me by Dr. He from the veterinary hospital, and Yu Xixi who carefully and privately knocked on me to ask me what happened, and... Once a month, my mother asked me to go home for dinner.
Looking at the last chat, I still told me to go home for dinner. On the same day last month, not a word was bad, it was as if she set an alarm clock to remind herself once a month, so that she remembered to call my eldest son home for dinner to avoid appearing that they were too indifferent .
Staring at the few words that had become cold due to mechanical rigidity, I wanted to refuse, and sat on the bed for ten minutes, but still only issued a word "um". Compared with the previous month, the previous month, and every month of the previous year, there is no difference in the response.
Before going out, his eyes were suddenly shaken.
It may be close to the window, the sun shines in and falls on the trophy in the bookcase. Whether it is the trophy body or the diamond on the base, both the trophy body and the diamond on the base will shine, and its presence cannot be weakened through the glass.
Too dazzling.
After thinking about it, I went back to the house, took the trophy off the shelf, and locked it in the drawer.
I clicked on the work group and found that it was impossible to withdraw yesterday's speech, so I had to edit another one and send it out.
Calm down, I feel rational again.
Crowd: ? ? ?