Of course Qi Jin remembered.
However, that kind of memory is like a gray photo in an album of memories that is unwilling to look back, sealed in a certain page. That page was densely written with his once simplicity, optimism, and ignorance - now it seems, it's just some ridiculous jokes.
Every time, when he tried to cheer himself up, the album would automatically flip open to that page.
Force him to look back.
Now, Shen Yan has closed the album for him. He originally planned to forget it completely, press it to the bottom of the box, and never open it again.
I didn't expect that the photo inside would suddenly appear, suddenly... standing in front of me alive.
Qi Jin remembered the first time she faced the camera lens. No matter how stiff, no matter how unprepared, you will always have to laugh.
So his hand finally made a second movement, and he slowly lifted the cat and the box together, and pressed it against his side.
This posture makes him look more confident.
"Long time no see," Qi Jin turned around and greeted her politely and with a strange attitude. Even if there is no mirror in front of him, he knows that his smile is the one he usually wears on camera, gentle and distant, "Old classmate, you should be having a good time recently, right?"
When the man heard him calling himself "old classmate", his face seemed to turn pale, his footsteps stagnated, and he didn't come closer.
Qi Jin looked at this man again after many years. I haven't seen each other for so long, but my appearance is almost the same as before. I just came out and soaked in the society for a few years, and I have a more dignified image of a media person, with a suit and leather shoes, and my hair is combed brightly. After becoming a husband and a father, I started to take the mature man route, and it is estimated that I am still as favored by the opposite sex as when I was studying.
"I'm living a normal life. I work in a TV station like you." The man paused, as if trying to explain that his presence was not intentional, "This unit exchange activity, I'm here on business for two days... I'm from The alumni association had heard of you working here... but I didn't expect to meet you."
Having said that, his eyes fell on Qi Jin's left arm hanging the plaster tube, hesitating to say anything.
"That... what's going on?"
"Car accident." Qi Jin's answer was very succinct, without explaining any details. His tone was as straightforward as a work report. "I got it on a business trip and my left hand is broken. I have to recuperate at home, so I don't come to work very often."
"Is the injury serious?" The man asked about his arm, but his eyes had shifted to his face, and he was stunned, as if he could see it.
"No matter how serious the injury is, there will be a day for recovery." Even if there are sequelae, it will not prevent him from continuing to live.
Qi Jin replied calmly.
What he once thought could not be said can now be expressed smoothly, which was unimaginable before. After he really opened his mouth, he found that facing his past seemed easier than he had imagined, and he couldn't help but feel a lighthearted sense of relief, even if this ease came at the cost of the other party's heavy heart, he didn't feel guilty.
The man shouldn't have expected him to reply like this. They are both smart people, and the implication does not need to be explained. So his face was even more ugly than before.
The impression of Qi Jin is not like this.
In my impression, Qi Jin is still the one who was clean and bright many years ago. He is very popular and greets everyone with a smile. When facing himself, he is unexpectedly shy and unexpectedly positive, but he is not. It would be entangled like some women, and this wonderful sense of contrast caused him to sneak in and taste it. And, no matter what you do wrong, you can be forgiven with a little pleading.
But now, this way of speaking with needles hidden in cotton makes men very uncomfortable.
He still misses the green and docile Qi Jin from before.
There was silence on both sides.
Qi Jin felt that all he had to say was finished, but the man didn't think so. After all, they had a relationship more than friendship before.
"We really haven't seen each other for a long time, since the wedding." The man obviously hesitated for a moment, and finally decided to mention the lid that shouldn't be mentioned. When a person feels that his trace in the other person's heart has faded, he will always draw a few more strokes involuntarily - this is a man's terrible competitive psychology.
"I'm busy with news, and I'm very busy with work." Qi Jin didn't give him a chance to go deep into the topic, and gently blocked him back with a sentence.
The man stared at him for a while, as if suspecting that the person in front of him was not Qi Jin.
Unfortunately, his appearance has not changed much, except that his temperament is more stable and generous than before, and his outline is tougher. Although he was injured, his whole body was clean and refreshed, and he was not in a state of embarrassment. However, there was no smile in the eyes, the light and soft texture of the past disappeared, and there was a hint of sharpness.
"You, do you still remember me?" asked again reluctantly.
"Didn't I already greet you?" Qi Wei watched him take another step forward, raised his chin slightly, and used rhetorical questions to stop him from continuing to approach.
"You know I'm not asking this." Remembering is not just remembering, but remembering.
Qi Jin didn't answer immediately, frowned and stood still.
The man seemed to have seized the first-line opportunity, hurriedly took two steps forward, and apologized softly: "I know it's my fault that I didn't contact you in time after the wedding. There were too many things at the time of the wedding, and I had to go to the same city every three or five years. Greetings from my father-in-law and mother-in-law, I can't get through to your cell phone when I'm free..."
I can't get through because I changed my number.
At that time, I had already left home, and I came to a strange city to live independently and let my life start all over again. Mobile numbers are no exception.
Qi Jin listened silently, his fingers tightening around the corner of the box involuntarily, and the cardboard dented in his grip.
Not out of any emotion, just a subconscious action.
"Later I heard that you went to work, you left your hometown and didn't know where you were, and you didn't come to the class reunion. I didn't know what happened to you for a long time, so—"
"I know what's going on with you," Qi Jin suddenly interrupted him. "After you got married, everything went smoothly. The first year you were promoted, and the second year, your wife added a big fat boy to your family. , I'm going to go to elementary school now, right? I really didn't go to the class reunion, but people as beautiful as you have been mentioned more or less on other occasions."
If you really want to know a person's current situation, there are actually many ways. Besides, they are all in the media.
The man was stunned when he heard this.
Then, there was an undisguised joy in his eyes: "You... You really still miss me."
The corners of Qi Jin's mouth curled up, and he poured cold water on him suddenly: "Because you are the best student among your classmates, of course I have to follow you. Although I am not as popular as you in my work, the leaders of the unit are also I like me very much, and my colleagues treat me well. Besides, I have found a very good boyfriend, and things are going well so far—maybe, you will miss me in the future."
The man's expression seemed to be struck by thunder, and he looked at Qi Jin in amazement, as if shocked by his last words.
"You... haven't changed it yet... "
Qi Jin was also stunned for a moment.
When he understood what the other party meant, the poured cold water seemed to have poured on top of his head, and it was extremely cold, but instead he had the illusion of being burned. There was a sullen anger in the bottom of my heart, and I laughed in anger, and laughed twice in front of the man.
changed
What does it mean to reform, to marry a wife and have children like him, to wash away the so-called "black history" that the world cannot tolerate, and to be a complete "normal person"? In this regard, he is quite consistent with his parents' views.
"Isn't it you who is the most unqualified person to ask this question?" Qi Wei smiled and replied coldly, "You should already know exactly what my sexual orientation is. No matter how many years later, I will find They're all boyfriends, not girlfriends."
The man seemed to feel embarrassed, and hurriedly glanced around to make sure that no one was near them before lowering his voice: "Qi...I don't mean anything else, it's all for your sake. Actually, I...I checked the information later, yes That circle has some understanding. If you keep going like this... it's not good for your health."
-not good for health.
If you think about it, it's a very meaningful statement.
Hearing this, Qi Jin laughed softly, and suddenly strode in front of him.
The man couldn't prevent it, and he was forced to take a step back, but Qi Jin was already within a stone's throw and stared at him with a tone of sadness and resentment: "So you know—yes, since you got married I couldn’t recover, but I couldn’t change my nature, so I had to find men outside every day. My private life was very messy, promiscuous, and I didn’t know how many people I’ve had sex with. And because they were all men, there was no need for contraception, even condoms. Don't wear it. As you said, it's HIV-positive now."
The man's face was as pale as paper for a moment.
Hearing the word "positive", he even took a breath, suddenly realizing that Qi Jin was very close to him, and hurriedly staggered back several steps, almost tripping.
At this moment, Qi Jin's sad expression disappeared without a trace, and she raised half of her eyebrows and smiled coldly: "Why, do you think I would say that?"
Only half of the man's cold sweat leaked out, but he was just pushed back by this dramatic turn.
He looked at Qi Jin in surprise, and Qi Jin looked at him calmly.
Seeing his helpless and embarrassed look, Qi Jin smiled and retracted his leaning body, returning to his usual upright stance. After taking off all the burdens, his expression was quite free and easy, and his smile was also: "It's a pity, I cherish myself more than you think. I haven't done any of the things I just said."
It's true that some people in gay circles are messed up, but he's not among them.
Working hard to earn money, support yourself, and live independently is no different from those who claim to be "normal".
"As for the body, I have a lot of small problems due to work, but there are no serious illnesses. This car accident was just an accident. I will gradually change my bad work and rest habits in the future to make myself healthier."
Qi Jin continued.
Recognizing how unbearable he was in the eyes of the other party, the panic at the reunion at the beginning also dissipated, and even a kind of pity for that person's ignorance.
"Qi Jin..." The man finally realized that he was deliberately trying, and hurriedly took a few steps forward. Ke Qi shook his head.
"You just care about your position in my heart and want to know how much influence you have on me—your vain personality really hasn't changed over the years." His voice was a little hoarse, but his words were clear. I cut open the old wounds sentence by sentence, but I don't feel pain, but happy, "I won't lie to you about the following words - my life is indeed different because of you, I came out early, and was cut off by my family. Sooner or later things will happen, you just accelerated it, so I don't blame you. Another change is that you made me a coward who didn't dare to like anyone easily. I have been alone all these years. But today After hearing what you said, I feel really stupid."
Fortunately, because this person did not cast a shadow on him, he refused to accept Shen Yan's hands.
Fortunately... I have been strong until now, until I meet someone who truly cherishes me.
"I don't know if you still miss the old me, but I can tell you for sure, that I don't exist anymore. Now I'll just look forward and have a good time with my boyfriend. Oh, yes, I I recently applied for a promotion to be a host, although I don’t have much hope, but I can try hard.” When Qi Jin said this in one breath, the suffocation in his chest was swept away, and he was very magnanimous, and smiled brightly at the man. "So, live your life the way you want, 'old school'—goodbye."
After all, turn around and walk in the direction of the road.
It's almost time for the taxi to leave, it's time to go home. Shen Yan must be waiting for him to have dinner.
At this time, the left arm was suddenly grabbed from behind: "Qi!"
Qi Jin was taken aback and couldn't move.
His right hand couldn't cope for a while because he was holding the cardboard box, and his left hand was where he fractured. If you struggle hard, you will inevitably touch the wound, and the newly grown bones may be broken again, which is not worth the loss.
"Qi Jin, don't go." The man gasped heavily, sounding very unwilling. His palm was clenching Qi Jin's upper arm, and it was painful to the point of pain, "I want to have a good talk with you, don't leave yet. The guest house where I live is at the next intersection, you go back with me... I'm not talking here. Place, go back with me, I can't just let you go."
"You're crazy, let go!" Qi Jin frowned in pain, coldly telling him to let go. But the other party refused.
"Don't move... It won't be worth it if you break it again." The man's other hand even squeezed his right arm firmly, forcing him to turn around and look at himself. When Qi Jin heard the words, she raised her head to meet his gaze, only to find that the other party's eyes were not quite right, and she didn't mean to joke at all. She was shocked, but her body was restrained and unable to break free. At this time, the man said in a deep voice, "This is the door of your unit, people come and go, you don't want to make trouble, aren't you still waiting for promotion?"
Indeed it is.
It is the door of his work unit, not his work unit. If there is a big trouble, you will be at a disadvantage. He is smart and knows how to grasp the weakness of others.
"Are you threatening me?" Qi Wei's voice trembled with anger, and laughed angrily.
"No," the man played hard and soft, showing his former affection and gently coaxing him, "I haven't seen each other for a long time, I didn't expect you to be so dissatisfied with me... I'm very sad. You misunderstood something, I want to tell you well. clear."
"I don't want to hear it, let it go."
"Qi Jin, go back with me." The man completely ignored his resistance. The strength of the fingers increased again. Qi Jin had not used his left hand much these days, so he did not dare to be neglected, and Shen Yan treated it with great care. At this time, half of his arm was paralyzed by the man's restraint. .
Qi Jin felt a little regretful.
He forgot that this person is very competitive by nature, and what he said just now was like a slap in the face of the other party, of course the other party would not give up. If he was tearing his face and yelling, that person might really push himself to the ground in a hurry, and his arm would definitely be broken again.
Heart, suddenly began to chaotic pace.
Obviously the phone is in his pocket, but he can't find the opportunity to make a call. And that person will definitely not give himself such a chance.
Up to now, we can only act by chance—