Tao Huainan gradually didn't dare to lie on the bed, most of the time he just sat or curled up on his side. Because during the time he couldn't hear, he felt more and more like lying in a coffin.
It was sealed in a closed space with only itself, buried deep in the ground.
When he can't hear, Tao Huainan longs for sleep, and looks forward to hearing when he wakes up; but when he can hear, he is most afraid of sleepiness, afraid of falling asleep and sinking again when he wakes up, so he is afraid of sleep, and wants to Stay awake for as long as possible.
The atmosphere at home was heavily suppressed by him, and no one spoke much. Tao Huainan knew that his brothers had nothing to do with him, so he was very worried, but he didn't dare to force him. Tao Huainan himself didn't know what to do, the time he couldn't hear was getting longer and longer, and the time left for him was getting shorter and shorter.
The little brother was so angry that he stopped talking, Tao Huainan really wanted to hug him.
Sometimes Tao Huainan even wanted to tell everything without hesitation, to share the fear and despair with his brothers and transfer them to them, so that someone would hold his hand and hold him all the time.
When Chi Cheng dragged him out of the bed and wanted to take him to the hospital, Tao Huainan was terrified. The depression and fear of so many days suddenly had an outlet, he began to scream and scream, holding Chi Cheng and crying sharply.
People are really complicated. When he was crying, he even felt that he was conveying something to Chi Cheng, and there was an ugly longing deep in his heart, looking forward to the moment when he couldn't bear it anymore, and told his little brother all these. This kind of thought would never exist when he was awake, and only popped up in his consciousness when he collapsed, and was quickly suppressed by Tao Huainan.
Chi Cheng hugged him, patted him, kissed him, called "baby", and lifted his clothes to kiss his stomach.
Brother is really nice. Tao Huainan's mind raced through so many years, and Chi Cheng brought him up day by day to where he is today. He would give him whatever he wanted, and on the surface he seemed to have a big temper, but in fact he never had anything to do with him.
Tao Huainan put his hand on Chi Cheng's neck, close to his pulse, feeling the powerful pulse under his palm.
In Tao Huainan's short life, Chi Cheng accompanied him for almost two-thirds of the time. Focusing on a point in the void, Tao Huainan called "little brother" twice, but he blurred the two "little brother", as if he was holding it in his mouth and couldn't bear to let it go.
"You go." Tao Huainan said.
The brother did leave.
That summer, Tao Huainan tore the two of them apart from the root, the joint was bloody and bloody, and both sides were cramped and painful.
At that time, Tao Huainan really hoped that Chi Cheng would go far away, and he also really hoped that he would never meet the next Tao Huainan again. Because Tao Huainan exists to make his relatives sad, and all the people he loves will always suffer because of him.
He shouldn't be alive.
It was snowing again outside, and the small rustling sound continued to come from outside. Tao Huainan listened to it for a while, and used to find it annoying, but now he just thinks that any sound is beautiful.
From that year on, Tao Huainan was no longer afraid of any sound. The deafening thunder, the sudden honking of the whistle, Tao Huainan was not afraid no matter how harsh and abrupt the sound was. It is lucky to be able to hear, all voices are gifts from fate, these are very good.
The younger brother sent him back and returned to Beijing.
At eleven o'clock, Tao Huainan sent a message to Chi Cheng, asking if he got in the car.
Chi Cheng replied to him: Yes.
The earphones were playing the recordings from that year again, and Tao Huainan turned on the recordings on his mobile phone every time he couldn't hear, so that he could know what others said when he recovered his hearing.
Tao Huainan didn't hear that recording at first, and a short sentence was caught in several hours of audio. That was the day when he was forced by his brother to take him to the hospital for the first time. When he came back, Chi Cheng lay on their bed while Tao Huainan huddled in the corner of the bed silently. The two spent the night together strangely and peacefully.
None of them fell asleep, but Tao Huainan didn't hear Chi Cheng's signal to stay with him at that time.
The first time I heard it was more than a week after Chi Cheng left. Tao Huainan was wearing earphones, sitting on Chi Cheng's study chair, leaning against the edge of the table. When Chi Cheng's voice suddenly came to his ears, Tao Huainan didn't even react. After hearing that sentence, Tao Huainan sat there for a long time, in a daze, like a pool of lifeless bones.
After five years of listening to a short audio, Tao Huainan still felt it was not enough.
After a deep sleep in the old house in the afternoon, this night is destined to suffer from insomnia. When he couldn't fall asleep, he kept listening to Chi Cheng's pain. Before dawn, he sent a message to Chi Cheng again: "Is little brother here?"
Chi Cheng didn't return, he should have gotten off the car.
Beijing is warmer than their side, not so cold.
Yesterday, he made an appointment to meet Pan Xiaozhuo. Tao Huainan didn't sleep for a while until dawn. He had a class in the afternoon. After the class, he took a taxi to Pan Xiaozhuo's campus.
"Why are your eyes so swollen?" Pan Xiaozhuo asked as soon as he saw him, "What are you doing?"
Tao Huainan said, "It's a little inflamed, it's fine."
Pan Xiaozhuo laughed and said to him: "I think it's because your little brother is gone and you are crying secretly."
Tao Huainan couldn't help laughing: "Buried in the pillow and cried bitterly? That's what I have to do!"
"You have to be like that!" Pan Xiaozhuo looked very happy, and even bought a cup of milk tea for Tao Huainan, but he didn't buy it himself.
Little Glasses has been saving money recently, the child is not rich in the first place, so the scholarship has to be saved.
Tao Huainan asked him, "What do you want to save money for?"
Pan Xiaozhuo said, "Buy something."
"What?" Tao Huainan thought he needed something, such as a mobile phone and computer, and he could buy one as a Christmas present.
Pan Xiaozhuo smiled mysteriously and said, "I won't tell you."
"It's a little secret." Tao Huainan bit the pearl in the milk tea, "I'll tell you everything, you can keep a secret with me."
"This sentence is too silly!" Pan Xiaozhuo was disgusted by him, lying on the table in disgust. It was inconvenient to wear glasses, and he propped them up every time he lay down.
Pan Xiaozhuo took off his eyes and put them aside, squinting his blind eyes, lying on the small round table vaguely. Tao Huainan touched his eyes and tapped on the table.
"Did Ji Nan look for you? He said he would come back next week."
Tao Huainan blinked: "Brother Nan?"
Pan Xiaozhuo said "ah": "He said he would call you."
"You two are connected?" Tao Huainan was quite surprised, in his impression that the two people shouldn't have too much intersection.
Pan Xiaozhuo didn't answer directly, and lay down again.
Tao Huainan turned his head and asked tentatively, "When he comes back, you two will meet?"
Pan Xiaozhuo immediately sat up straight and said, "What am I doing seeing him!"
"Just ask," Tao Huainan returned the glasses to him, and smiled, "I'll call you for dinner."
Pan Xiaozhuo quickly shook his head: "I won't go."
Tao Huainan did not hide anything from him. Pan Xiaozhuo was his closest friend and knew all his secrets.
Pan Xiaozhuo asked him: "Then what are you going to do?"
Tao Huainan said, "I'm thinking of a way."
"What can you do? Your little brother is in Beijing."
"If you don't, you have to think about it." Tao Huainan was very active, and he was very energetic when he woke up this morning. "You can't just wait."
Chi Cheng's words made him over-excited, otherwise he would have kept twisting. In fact, he had already pointed out the way for Tao Huainan, but my brother was still soft-hearted. Even if he said that he would not recognize the old house, but he said it, he said he cared, which made Tao Huainan have a position no matter how he chased him.
But the little brother is still aloof and doesn't reply to messages very much, which is similar to before he came back this time.
Tao Huainan's message before was a little false, he couldn't figure out where he was, and he didn't know how to say it.
It's different now, and now there's a bottom line.
"Brother Chi, the phone is ringing." Guo Yiming told Chi Cheng after he got out of the shower.
Chi Cheng's hair hadn't been wiped yet, and while pulling the towel with one hand, he took a T-shirt for sleeping: "Phone?"
"WeChat." Guo Yiming said, "It rang several times."
Chi Cheng turned on his phone after wiping his hair and getting dressed, and there was another red dot in the upper right corner of Mao Tao on WeChat.
-Bro
— Let me show you when it snows.
There are also two photos posted below. The snowflakes are flying under the street lamps. The photos are scattered and the snowflakes are all glued together. The lens should have been blocked by falling snow, so it was blurry.
Immediately afterwards, he posted: Did you take the photo? Can you see snowflakes
Chi Cheng put the phone aside, Guo Yiming asked, "Huainan?"
Chi Cheng looked at him, his eyebrows were half raised, and his expression was rather handsome.
Guo Yiming said: "I heard from Fan Guo that they often chat."
"What can they talk about?" Chi Cheng said.
"I don't know, Guo'er can chat with anyone anyway, he's so talkative." Guo Yiming said with a smile, "One day I heard him say that Huainan gave him red envelopes, so don't let him do anything, be careful Well, he may toss."
Chi Cheng raised his eyebrows that had just been lowered, casually put the towel beside him, and said, "What can you do?"
"It's hard to say," Guo Yiming still laughed, "Who knows."
Early the next morning, when it was still dark, there was a knock on the dormitory door.
Guo Yiming just got up to go to the bathroom and opened the door. Wearing a down jacket and a ski cap, Fan Guo came in with a big bag of breakfast, put it on Chi Cheng's table, and said, "You must let Brother Chi eat the buns and meatballs in Niujie! You stare at them. He eats!"
Guo Yiming was stunned: "Is Niujie early in the morning?"
"Ah, I brought yours too, let's eat with Brother Chicheng." Fan Guo took a photo of Chicheng's table, picked up his phone and was about to leave.
Chi Cheng was awakened by him, looked at him sideways from above, and asked, "What are you doing?"
"Good morning, my little brother," Fan Guo jumped up and said, "If you have nothing to do, please reply to Ren Nannan's news! Which brother is as cold as you!"
As soon as Chi Cheng opened his eyes, his eyes could pop out of the boss's double eyelids, and he looked fierce. He looked down, but Fan Guo was a little afraid of him, and said, "I bought you breakfast, remember to eat it later!"
Chi Cheng didn't bother to pay attention to him, and didn't wake up, turned over and turned his back to him.
Fan Guo opened the door and left, Guo Yiming also planned to go back to sleep for a while, got into bed and asked Chi Cheng: "I don't want to say that he can toss?"
"It's free." Chi Cheng said while wrapped in a quilt.
"He takes money to do things, I guess Guo'er will take care of you until you go home." Guo Yiming couldn't help laughing when he spoke, brother Chi would get angry sooner or later if he was tortured by Fan Guo every day.
This matter is really not bad for Tao Huainan, so he just asked Fan Guo to take care of his little brother as much as possible, such as helping him bring breakfast and buy water or something. It's because Fanguo is distracted by himself, so he is conscious of accepting the red envelopes, he surrounds Chi Cheng every day to inquire about his health, wishing to have three meals a day at hand.
One day the little brother couldn't bear it any longer, and angrily asked Guo Yiming to take Fanguo away, took out his phone, unlocked it, and sent a message to Maotao.
—Do you have money to burn it