First Kiss Diary

Chapter 79: Sheng Xingyu x Jiang Yindu

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The story begins nine years ago.

Before meeting Jiang Yin, the harsh winter of that year was so long that it was almost despairing for Sheng Xingyu.

Sister Sheng Qianye signed a contract with Hua Yan and took him along.

After Sheng Qianye had undergone professional training, the company suggested that she become an actress. Since she is so young and tender that you could almost pinch water out of her, she would be well suited to be arranged into any idol drama.

Although he also had outstanding looks, he was only sixteen years old at the time, and there were too few male actors of this age in idol dramas, let alone urban dramas.

What's more, teenagers mature late, so they don't have a delicate enough mind to analyze characters, nor do they have enough experience to perfect their expression.

So he was sent abroad to join a Korean company that cooperated with Hua Yan and became a trainee.

—How far do you have to go from being a trainee to debuting? How long does it take

He had never thought about this question, nor did he know how important the word "fame" was. He only knew that after his parents passed away, their choices became fewer and fewer, and this might be the only way out if they wanted to break through the adversity.

On my first day at the company, I couldn’t speak the language and there were almost strangers all around me. The language teacher arranged by the company would not arrive until the next morning and there was only one hour of language class per day.

Fortunately, he is still young and has a strong learning ability. After a week, he has learned some simple communication skills. When asked casually, he found out that the training age of the trainees was counted in "years".

One year, two years, or even five years - and it's not enough time to qualify for debut.

There is only one place for debut among a thousand trainees, and those who are not selected can either continue to practice and wait for the next opportunity, or have to give up and return to a mediocre life. And most people can only choose the latter in the end.

Very few people are favored by fate, and accepting one's fate is the only way out in this prosperous circle.

It's snowing heavily outside the window and the long street is quiet.

The cold air came in through the window that was slightly open. Sheng Xingyu lay on the floor, pillowing his wet clothes, breathing in the sweat and cold air to try to wake himself up.

Life is nothing but practice, dull and mechanical. When I recall it, it is all blank, except for myself constantly searching for the best sense of balance in the mirror.

The special family environment has made him much more mature than his peers, and he has a clearer understanding of the responsibilities on his shoulders.

But after three months of being alone in a foreign country, he felt suffocated by the tense environment and the pressure of having almost no future. He couldn't even find a friend to talk to, and he only reported good news to his sister, not bad news.

China's star-making industry has never been as developed as South Korea's. Most of the Korean trainees here are relatively mature, but the few Chinese are still honing their basics. The Korean trainees next door even look at them with mockery when they pass by.

The dispute finally broke out when the other party said "Chinese are trash". Sheng Xingyu and a group of Chinese trainees rushed over and started a fierce battle with that side, and also found an outlet to vent their pent-up emotions.

He was the one rushing in the front. When he was pulled away by the staff, his arms were covered with wounds and his face was also covered with bruises.

He was in so much pain, but he endured it without saying a word. After dinner, he pretended nothing had happened and continued to practice dancing. He waited until everyone in the practice room left before he leaned against the wall, exhausted.

He wanted to call Sheng Qianye, but his phone was broken into pieces in the fight and couldn't be turned on.

Sheng Xingyu threw his phone into the trash can in annoyance, but it missed and slipped to the door.

The woman in loafers happened to walk to the door and picked up his phone.

That was the first time he met Jiang Yin.

The moonlight in the middle of the night was unspeakably gentle, and her long white dress fluttered in the air, carrying with it a real yet unreal scent of fireworks.

She walked lightly.

Jiang Yin didn't say anything either. She sat quietly beside him and reinstalled the battery in her phone. Miraculously, the phone turned on again, and the graceful light illuminated her profile.

She glanced at him, and the first thing she said was—

"Why didn't you change your clothes when they were wet? Didn't you bring any clean clothes?"

He turned out to be Chinese. He took a breath and replied, "My clothes are in the dormitory."

"Next time, bring a few more tops to the practice room. Change them when they get wet with sweat, otherwise you'll catch a cold easily."

Jiang Yin took out a bottle of alcohol and a few Band-Aids from her bag: "I came out in a hurry, so I only took these. When you go back, treat the wound to avoid infection."

The boy bent his legs, a long-lost emotion came over him, but unfortunately he was too young to tell what it was.

He wanted to ask about her identity, but was afraid that some of his expectations would be dashed, so in the end his Adam's apple rolled and he couldn't open his mouth.

Sheng Xingyu unscrewed the cap of the alcohol bottle and poured it onto the wound awkwardly.

She said: "People in our company cannot lose even if they have to fight."

"I didn't lose," the boy said in a low, stubborn voice, "I won't let go until they cry."

Jiang Yin seemed to smile, and touched the end of his hair lovingly: "Whether it is the stage or here, it is a place where strength is king."

"If you can shut them up today, you will surely be able to do so on stage soon."

He was startled, and felt a subtle electric current drilling into his skin.

Seeing that he had explained almost everything he needed to, Jiang Yin stood up and looked at him straight in the face, then frowned at the wound on his face.

"besides… "

"What?"

"Remember to protect your face next time you fight."

The woman lifted his chin and looked at him without any ambiguity, as if she was admiring a work that was about to be completed: "Your face is much more valuable than theirs."

She lowered her eyebrows and asked, "Did you remember it?"

"Yes, I remember that."

Under the window where the moonlight was shining like a silver thread, he heard himself answering.

She finally left behind a loose white short-sleeved shirt: "Luckily I usually like to buy men's clothes. If you don't mind, you can change into it first. We will be in the wind for a while when we return from here. If you catch a cold and get sick, it will affect your training."

He changed with his back to her. His clothes had a scent that belonged only to her, a very light, watery scent.

When the boy looked back, she was gone.

///

The next night he waited until twelve o'clock, but she did not come again.

He regretted that he hadn't even been able to ask her name.

Later, he pieced together information from various sources and found out that the fight that day had been reported back to the company. The top management was furious and wanted to end their training career, but Jiang Yin insisted on giving the boys another chance and personally asked the president for permission.

She finally won the right for them to stay and rushed to the practice room to see him that night. Unfortunately, it was too late and he was the only one there, so they were only alone for a dozen minutes.

On the fifth day, Jiang Yin appeared in the practice room.

She told him that the project was now under her charge, and that she would do her best to support them regardless of whether they could finally debut.

Honestly, he didn't know why.

She was clearly an agent with some fame in her country, but she gave up a great opportunity to rise to the top and came to Korea to support several trainees who didn't even know if they could debut.

They are on the edge and almost abandoned. They are not the key projects carefully built by the company, but are just a means of testing the waters. They do not have a team to package gorgeous personalities, nor do they have the support of the domestic idol market.

Everyone treated them as experimental subjects, but Jiang Yin was different.

Jiang Yin treated them as treasures, and at certain moments when they looked at each other, Sheng Xingyu saw light in her eyes.

So he practiced harder and trained harder than ever before. He thought that even if other trainees couldn't debut, so what? He, Sheng Xingyu, must make a name for herself, and return to the Chinese market with glory and treasure.

He wanted to prove that she was worth it.

Everyone in the practice room is gambling, betting their youth on a magnificent dream.

He did it.

After nearly three years of a gray training career, he debuted as the only Chinese member and lead singer in the group. The group became the talk of the town for a while, not only winning all the awards in South Korea, but also causing a craze in China.

The group was so popular during that time that even the unknown music store outside the school was playing their songs.

His contract with South Korea only lasted for two years. After the contract expired, which made both companies a large sum of money, he returned to the mainland to develop his career. His popularity only increased, and he became a huge star.

If Ji Shiyan opened the channel for the idol market and prepared for it at that time, then Sheng Xingyu single-handedly brought up the idol market in the domestic entertainment industry after Ji Shiyan's transformation.

His own abilities are certainly important, but Jiang Yin also made an indelible contribution. After this battle, she was successfully promoted to a first-line agent.

Sheng Xingyu once asked her, "Why did you stay in Korea at that time?"

"I'm sure there is an idol market in the mainland, but we just need a fire to ignite it," Jiang Yin paused, "I have a good eye, and you did it."

She stayed without any selfish emotional motives, nor for him, but simply and stubbornly wanted to prove her own hypothesis and redivide the entertainment industry's pie.

He also thought that he had no selfish motives, and was simply wanting to repay her appreciation, her companionship during his lonely days in Korea, and her concern for every detail.

She treated him with care, so he should respond with equal care.

Until she smiled and talked to her friends about her future plans, saying that she would step down after supporting him to a certain extent, because her ambitions and dreams had been fulfilled, and her career achievements so far were enough.

What happens after you stop being a broker

She said calmly, let’s find someone to marry, have a child, and live an ordinary life.

After being in the world of fame and fortune for too long, she also wants to return to a simple life.

After Jiang Yin finished speaking, she glanced at him again and said, "Don't let your heart flutter just because the sisters are talking. You must remember not to fall in love."

From then on, he thought that at some moment in her future, he was completely excluded from her time and space.

That was the first time he didn't know how to control his emotions. At the dim intersection, the boy took advantage of his height to hold her in his arms and asked in a trembling voice, "You said you would hand me over to another agent in two years... You lied to me, didn't you?"

It turns out that he didn't want to repay her at all, he just liked her.

I like her, so I don’t want her efforts and expectations to go to waste; I don’t want her to be laughed at; I don’t want her to return empty-handed.

Perhaps it was because on that moonlit night with snow, she thought he was just a sixteen-year-old kid who hadn't grown up, and handed him one of her clothes. In a foreign country, the cold wind blew, and the boy got cold with his wet clothes. It was only when he put on her clothes that he felt a little warmth - the irreplaceable, definite warmth that only she could give.

Jiang Yin was so smart, and she was nine years older than him. She knew better than him what kind of feelings were contained in the warmth of his embrace.

The woman did not say anything to anger or appease him. She just waited for him to calm down, then calmly and cruelly took two steps back, raised her head and said, "You are an idol. I'm sure you know better than me what this job is."

"You are selling a persona and a dream. Now you want to obey human emotions. What about the fans? Do you think it's fair to them?"

"Idols who haven't graduated are not qualified to talk about love," Jiang Yin shook her head, "Sheng Xingyu, this is a disqualification for idols."

This is the kingdom she built with her own hands, the rules she divided with her own hands. It is an indispensable myth in the kingdom of right time, right place and right people. Now this myth says that she has to shatter all of this with her own hands.

How could she agree

After saying this, Jiang Yin left and heard him say behind her: "You are just trying to convince me and yourself."

He is right.

She tossed and turned that night, and finally realized that the love she gave had exceeded the limit. This feeling was no longer the heartache she had for the little boy, nor was it the care that an agent should give to a valued artist. She had unknowingly given almost everything.

She thought that what she wanted was an ordinary love outside the circle, but the moment he hugged her, she was shocked.

But she had long passed the age of dizziness and confusion, so she maintained the rationality to retreat.

She failed to maintain the proper distance between herself and the artist, causing the artist to receive messages that they shouldn't have received at that time.

She is even more unqualified as an agent.

After careful consideration, Jiang Yin decided to resign as her agent.

She has always been cruel to others and even crueler to herself. Such negligence at work is a taboo for her. She cannot accept that she will make a mistake. Resigning is her respect for this profession, but also a punishment for herself.

The handover took three days, and on the last day, she went to see him in person in order to get him to accept the new agent.

He also stayed at home for three whole days, postponing all activities and even not eating much.

"The new agent will contact you later. The notice the day after tomorrow is very important. Leave more time to do your homework." She gave the usual instructions, and finally took a deep breath and said slowly, "Not everyone will go along with you like I do. Don't go on a hunger strike again in the future."

Since there is always one party forcing the other to give up, let her do it.

Sheng Xingyu was sitting opposite him, with red eyes, and suddenly smiled.

"You're leaving just because of what I said?" He asked in a hoarse voice, "Don't you think that's too cruel?"

Jiang Yin put the last piece of information on the table and turned around: "I'm not cruel, you've been out of fashion for a long time."

The moment she opened the door and was about to leave, the young man strode over barefoot, closed the door again, grabbed her arm and held her firmly against the door, looking into her eyes: "You don't like me at all? I don't believe it."

"It doesn't matter anymore," she said. "To keep my current position, I have to make trade-offs. Liking or disliking these things is not important at all."

Since she loves him, she cannot destroy him.

He may not know more about how difficult it is to get to this point except through practice, but she has seen too much in the turbulent world of fame and fortune, and if the current situation is retreated, there will never be such a prosperous time again.

She was reluctant to let his efforts of so many years go to waste. Once she thought about the fact that in order to fulfill herself and love, she would have to disappoint the young man who practiced dancing late at night with a back injury, she could not be selfish at all.

Wasn't all her persistence just for this moment to stand out and reach the top? He had only been back in China for less than half a year and was still in the rising stage of his career. He absolutely could not be distracted, and she couldn't let those years go to waste.

The tearing kiss was almost expected. The corner of her mouth was injured. She wanted to say something harsher to persuade him to give up as soon as possible, but she tasted the saltiness at the corner of her mouth and finally couldn't bear it.

She couldn't bear to do that.

He was the little boy she watched grow up. She treated him as a living work of art that she carved most carefully and meticulously, until she finally brought him to the prosperous world as she wished.

So many years of companionship have already seeped into her bones. She has so many reasons to convince herself that they cannot be together, but she has no reason to convince herself not to like him.

///

The remaining three years were like a fleeting blank.

In the end, she did not retire from the entertainment industry as she wished, but simply moved to a more secretive behind-the-scenes role.

Perhaps she understood that once she left, the only faint connection with him would be severed, and she didn't want to lose all news related to him.

Sheng Xingyu never came to see her again.

Sometimes she felt that this was the best ending. He shone brightly on the stage. He deserved and should be seen by more people, always standing in the cheers and crowds. The years of practice also became meaningful.

His business ability was getting better and better, with crazy progress almost every year. She would occasionally think that he seemed to have become a better person after leaving her.

Until his birthday party, Ji Ning said he would drag her along no matter what. She still remembered that the moon was very round that night, and Sheng Xingyu just stood behind her and whispered to her -

"You said that I am not eligible to date before graduation. If I graduate, will I be eligible?"

She tried desperately to convince herself how could it be possible. After so many years, the world he saw had become more vast, and the scenery he saw was more vast and magnificent. How could he still be brooding over himself

It was not until the next day that the studio officially announced his sixth concert tour, with the theme of graduation.

Not surprisingly, she received a ticket for the final show.

After watching the entire performance, she was pleased that he had grown into a mature artist, able to accurately control the stage and give the best performance, with a steady breath while singing and dancing, delicate emotions when singing lyrical songs, and even able to sing a high note freely during an intense dance.

After the last song ended, Sheng Xingyu took off her complicated and gorgeous performance costume, revealing the innermost layer.

Jiang Yin was stunned.

That was the first time they met. She saw that he was soaked all over and was wearing a T-shirt that he casually took out of his bag.

Not surprisingly, he pointed at his clothes and said to the fans in the audience: "I don't think any of you know this, because I hadn't debuted yet, and I wasn't a famous trainee. The company didn't think I could debut, and I didn't think so either."

"But there was one person who told me that she thought I would not lose."

"I thought I had to live up to this saying, so I risked my life to practice, and gradually I fell in love with singing and dancing. At that time, I just felt it was magical."

"I later realized that maybe it was because I loved the person and loved his dog."

The fans below were screaming, and Jiang Yin covered her lips.

Sheng Xingyu had just finished a singing and dancing performance and was still a little out of breath, but her breath was steady: "When I returned to China, I attracted a lot of attention. She helped me carve out a new market, but because of the rules of the idol market, she rejected my love."

"I often think that if she wasn't so strict, I could be an idol and still have a secret relationship." The boy pulled off one of his earphones and laughed, "But then I thought, if she wasn't so strict, maybe I wouldn't be standing here today."

"She told me a lot when she resigned. I was too angry at the time to listen. Later I found out that she said that in order to keep her position, she had to give up something—"

"What I regret most is not telling her that she is part of the reason why I work so hard. No matter what the circumstances, she will never be the one to be abandoned."

"But fortunately, it's not too late now. I'm grateful for her rationality back then. It allowed me to work hard to improve myself over the past few years, do my best in what I like, and now I have the right to tell everyone—"

"Thank you all for your continued support. Sheng Xingyu is graduating today."

"I will just be an ordinary singer and hold ordinary concerts. You come to see me because you like my songs, not because you are buying my traffic and personality."

"She and I set the rules for the market back then, and now I am also responsible for ending this journey in front of her. Why do I have to graduate? Because she told me that if I don't graduate, I am not eligible to fall in love."

He took off his headset, put down the microphone, and jumped off the stage amid screams.

The lights went out and lit up again, and he walked in front of her, as if he had crossed all the obstacles and mountains and seas over the years.

He said, "I'm graduated, Jiang Yin."

He had been using his methods to get closer to her.

Every late night when he felt like he couldn't hold on any longer, he told himself that he could only appear in front of her again when he was capable enough to graduate.

He stood in the dim darkness and looked at her, exactly the same as when she had met him nine years ago.

Sheng Xingyu x Jiang Yin-End-

The author has something to say: I will write about Shuang Ji tomorrow? Do you want to read about the after-marriage

Two hundred red envelopes are also given out in this chapter!