The air was scorching hot, and the breath was short of breath. I bit the hem of the hoodie and sniffed a denim jacket against my nose.
The faint smell of men's perfume has long since dissipated, except for the smell of logs in the closet, there is no other smell at all. The emotions are getting higher and higher, but the mind is more chaotic.
Thin sweat oozes from his forehead, and the tip of his tongue touches the wet cloth.
Not enough, still not enough...
The anxiety that could not be vented in my heart prompted me to throw away my coat, and eagerly grabbed a silk handkerchief and pressed it to my mouth and nose, breathing desperately like an asthmatic patient.
When the breath of tobacco flows into the lungs through the respiratory tract, I feel as if I have been hit by an electric current, and I am extremely happy from body to heart.
The eyelashes fluttered a few times, and the body fell backward, falling into the bed like a cloud. I loosened the sweater in my mouth, half-closed my eyes and looked at the old electric fan on the ceiling, panting tiredly.
Covering the face with a silk handkerchief, through the thin fabric, everything looks like a layer of fog.
Freud believed that dreams are the carrier of wishes, and their meaning lies in the fulfillment of wishes.
When I dreamed of having sex with Sheng Minou for the first time, I woke up in horror and found that my lower body was sticky. I felt ashamed of everything that happened in the dream, and the great shame whipped my body and mind, making me just want to lock this dream firmly in my heart and never touch it again.
But contrary to expectations, the more you try to suppress it, the more it cannot be ignored.
When you are in class, when you are eating, when you are taking a bath, if you let go of any part of your brain, it is possible for it to take advantage of it. If there really are demons in this world, this absurd and sinister dream is the bait to lure me to fall.
And Qi Yang was the arrow that shot me into the abyss.
I couldn't figure out what was going on in my mind, and was confused by my feelings for Sheng Minou. This uncertainty made me suffer day and night. Finally on a certain day, I decided to solve it by myself and put an end to this matter completely.
I skipped school evening self-study and ran to find Sheng Minou. When I entered the old tube building, I felt nervous, or I could say I had a premonition. Let me take my steps lightly.
When I went up to the floor where Sheng Minou was renting, there was a faint light in the corridor, and I heard two men arguing.
"Qi Yang, don't bother me anymore."
The tips of my ears moved slightly, I would never admit that this voice was Sheng Minou.
"Don't push me away... I know who you are, it's ok, I'm totally accepting, totally accommodating..."
The other voice was also very familiar, especially the tone of pretending to be gentle, which made my stomach feel sick. It's that psycho.
I quickly recognized Qi Yang, the content of their conversation aroused my curiosity, I didn't make a sound, I chose to poke my head out secretly, and watched the two of them in the dark.
Sheng Minou stood in front of the half-open door, Qi Yang was very close to him. A dim sensor light was on above them, and the rest of the hallway was dark.
"You can do anything to me, as long as you are happy, I will never resist..." Qi Yang knelt down slowly, and lifted the hem of his clothes, revealing his belly.
I don't know what's there, but Sheng Minou didn't look away for a long time after looking at it, as if he was stunned, or... fascinated.
With a triumphant smile on Qi Yang's face, he took Sheng Minou's hand, and kissed his fingertips devoutly, like a faithful believer.
"You can use my blood as fine wine, my flesh as bread, stir my body on the bed, and spray your desire on my wounds..." He let go of Sheng Minou's fingers with nostalgia, and caressed his fingers clearly. The place where there was a gradual reaction to his words.
"I will scream and beg you for mercy, but I am willing." Qi Yang's bewitchment continued, he slowly undid the button between Sheng Min's crotch, with greedy eyes and excited expression, "Ah Sheng, I love you... I love you so much..."
I opened my eyes wide, and my fingers tightly gripped the safety door panel under my palm. Suddenly, countless voices appeared in my mind, screaming one after another, asking me to kick that crazy Qi Yang away and keep him away from Sheng Minou.
There seemed to be a layer of blood in front of my eyes, I was about to show my skills and beat the pervert to death, but Sheng Minou over there was one step ahead of me and kicked him away.
Qi Yang bumped against the opposite wall, curled up clutching his stomach, and let out an unbearable groan, which seemed to be quite painful.
But he could still laugh: "Yes, that's it...don't suppress yourself ahem..."
Sheng Minou's eyes were gloomy, and he sneered, "You think you know me well?" Standing there, he leisurely fastened the button that Qi Yang had unbuttoned, zipped it up, and said with thin lips, "Get lost."
He turned and entered the room, the door was closed very hard, and even the weak lamp shook slightly twice.
Qi Yang stared at the closed door and laughed idiotically. With his smile, blood appeared from his tightly clutched abdomen, which smudged outward along the fabric of the clothes.
deserve it.
I raised the corners of my lips silently, feeling very happy in my heart.
Qi Yang didn't seem to be leaving in a short time, and Sheng Minou didn't seem to be in the mood to have a good talk with me. After weighing the pros and cons, I finally decided to go back first.
Walking downstairs, I looked back at the location of Sheng Minou's rented house. There was a light there, an ordinary incandescent lamp, but it seemed to have some kind of magic power, making me keep looking at it.
Qi Yang and Sheng Minou's charade made me a little anxious, it was like a world, only they could enter, but I had to be blocked out.
Like Qi Yang, I used to think that I knew Sheng Minou very well, but it seems that this is not the case. I'm just a person who only deserves to be spit on by Sheng Minou, "You think you know me well".
After I got home, the head teacher reported my skipping class to my mother truthfully, which directly caused her to bombard me brutally and indiscriminately for half an hour in my ears.
She said, she suffered so much for me, why can't I understand something? He also said that it would be easy for my dad to die, so he doesn't have to work hard to discipline me.
In order to avoid her nagging, I hid in the bathroom.
"If you are as good at reading as Sheng Minou, I'd be relieved!" Her voice came through the door.
I splashed cold water and washed my face, the dream and the reality in my mind complemented each other, for a while it was Sheng Mingou's fierce panting in the dream, and for a while it was Qi Yang's greedy eyes in the corridor.
Water droplets dripped from the tip of my hair, I propped up the sink and raised my face, feeling a little dazed. If it wasn't for the fact that the face was still my own, I would have been familiar with it after seeing it for more than ten years, and I would have wondered if Qi Yang had followed me home.
The mirror faithfully reflected my appearance, my face was pale, my eye sockets were red, and my lips were tightly pressed together, making my brows even darker.
My eyes and Qi Yang's are so similar, greed, jealousy, admiration... these eyes contain all the complex emotions towards Sheng Minou, why should I go to him for an explanation, the answer has long been written in my eyes.
I am the same pervert as Qi Yang.
This realization irritated me quite a bit, and I punched the mirror with my emotions fluctuating.
Blood threads slowly flowed down the cobweb-like cracks. My mother opened the door and barged in when she heard the movement. Seeing what I had done, she screamed in horror.
"Xiaofeng, blood... blood! Why are you so impulsive... Mom is talking nonsense, and mother will never say it again."
She thought it was her words that hurt my sensitive heart, and she never dared to compare me with Sheng Minou again.
She doesn't know that my self-esteem is good and crumbling, it's the "brotherhood" that I have been self-righteous to Sheng Minou for more than ten years.
Ever since I knew that Fang Lei was the old king who walked back and forth in the green grassland above Sheng Minou's head, I paid special attention to him. Every time he comes to the pawn shop, I have to talk to him a few more words. After a long time, even Shen Xiaoshi felt strange, and asked me if I also surrendered to the charm of "Brother Sha", otherwise why I seemed so happy when he came.
Now he is talking nonsense with his eyes open. I am a little excited at most, but I am not too happy.
"... He wants to leave, but the boss won't let him go, so the stalemate is like this. If you want me to say, what's wrong with staying in your own company, how difficult it is to start your own business."
Fang Lei beamed and talked about his and his patron Bai Fumei's anecdotes, and when it came to Sheng Min'ou's part, he went on and on for a long time. In short, Sheng Min'ou wanted to get out of Meiteng and do it alone, but Bai Fumei's father didn't allow it.
Sheng Minou's success today is due to this big boss, and it's not easy to make too much trouble, so for the time being, the stalemate will remain like this.
"Not everyone likes to eat soft food like you." Shen Xiaoshi joked, "So Bai Fumei really fell in love with you?"
"Yesterday she said she would elope with me to Europe." Fang Lei said with a smile, "I feel sorry for her fiancé a little bit. I treat him as a handy tool, and my daughter wants to elope with others behind his back. He doesn't have any hobbies at work, what a failure his life is hahahahaha... "
I stared at his smiling face, leaned back on the back of the chair, and couldn't help but chuckle.
"It was quite a failure."
In the ten years in prison, I had the best friendship with three people—Wei Shi, Shen Xiaoshi, and Monkey.
On the day I was released from prison, Wei Shi and Shen Xiaoshi came to pick me up together. The monkey was in another city because he had to spend a lot of time filming celebrity gossip, so he didn't have time to come back.
Monkey is not his real name, but he has a thin body and thick body hair, resembling a macaque, that's why he is called "Monkey".
Monkey doesn't like people calling him by his real name, because his real name is Yi Dazhuang, which is extremely inconsistent with his personal image. Every time someone calls him "Dazhuang", he feels that the other party is mocking him.
Before Monkey went in, he was a private detective, but unlike Sherlock Holmes and Poirot, he did not deal with murder cases, but only helped Mrs. Fu and Mrs. Fu catch mistresses and investigate extramarital affairs.
Once, when helping a rich wife take photos of her husband's secret meeting in the villa, he accidentally clashed with the security guard of the villa and punched her nose. Mrs. Fu distanced herself from him when his deeds were revealed, and he was charged with wounding and trespassing, and ended up losing money and serving a year and a half in prison.
Due to his professional relationship, he has a lot of bullshit stories, and he has a great desire to express himself. Over time, he has become a recognized cross talk master in cell No. 67.
After tea and dinner, in free time, wherever he is, there will be endless jokes. So much so that after he squatted for a year and a half and left, Wei Shi, Shen Xiaoshi, me and I all missed him a lot.
After Monkey was released from prison, he stopped doing his old job and became a paparazzi instead.
I think it's pretty good too, not completely burying my craft.
After being released from prison, although he and I became friends with each other, except for giving each other likes in Moments and saying hello on holidays, we rarely chatted.
So when I took the initiative to call him and ask him out to negotiate a deal, he was a little surprised.