[Note: "Refiners" is written in a dual-line advancement system. The two generations of refiners intersect, contrast and influence each other. In order to ensure the dual-line advancement and make it clear to readers, I added F before the first line and E before the second line. F stands for Ke Zuo, the father, and E stands for Ke Mingzhe, the son.]
The author is Bing'er, and everyone calls me Lao Bing. Everyone I know thinks I am an evil person, always dealing with weird things. Once, I almost lost my life because of witchcraft, and was diagnosed as a mental patient. Lao Bing once again walked into the crematorium, and this time he went straight to the deepest part. Lao Bing has "Crematorium" and "The Death Sender", but neither of them went straight to the pain of the soul. This time is the final one, and from now on, I will no longer touch the weird things about the crematorium.
This time, I went straight to the deepest part of the crematorium and made a lifelong friend - Ke Mingzhe.
Ke Mingzhe, 36 years old, not married, 18 years old, he followed in his father's footsteps, a refiner, a job that burns people in a crematorium. I first met Ke Mingzhe, not Ke Mingzhe, but a poet who was the director of a crematorium. Now it is not called a crematorium, but a funeral home. I feel more comfortable calling it a crematorium, so when I write these things in the future, I will still write about a crematorium. You just need to know it as a funeral home, which is more direct.
Before I met Ke Mingzhe, I thought he was an evil person with an evil face. But after seeing his face, I found out that he was a kind person, and he was quiet and taciturn. This was beyond my expectation. I thought it was strange that a person who burned several people a day could remain calm.
I am a person who doesn't talk when I'm not drinking, but I talk nonsense when I'm drinking. I always declare before drinking that I won't take any responsibility for anything I say after drinking. I know my stupid behavior too well. I've paid too much for this, so I'm going to declare it in advance.
When I made the statement, Ke Mingzhe smiled faintly. It was this smile that made me feel that we were friends.
This time, after drinking, what I can never forget is Ke Mingzhe's indifferent smile.
A week later, I called him.
"Ke Mingzhe? I'm Lao Bing, the guy you drank with that day."
"Remember, I'm working now."
I hung up the phone. His job was to burn people. I felt a slight chill coming over the phone.
I know that after noon, unless there are special circumstances, he will go off work.
I called again at twelve o'clock, and sure enough, he had taken a shower, changed clothes, and was ready to get off work.
"Mingzhe, I want to treat you to lunch at noon."
"Please me?"
"right."
"Everyone is keeping their distance from me. I am here to burn people. Think about it."
"I've thought about it."
This was my first meeting with Ke Mingzhe, alone. Were you scared? Yes? Were you nervous? Yes. People say that if you come into contact with such a person, you will get into trouble and things will not go well for you. I know this, even if your friend's relative dies and you carry the body, you will have bad luck for three years. This is true. I was really unlucky in these three years. In these three years, I carried the body four times. I was unlucky. I got divorced, got sick, lost money in business, and nothing went well for me. So I don't know how bad my luck will be if I come into contact with such a person.
My poet curator friend once reminded me that you should think carefully and it’s best not to be too curious.
Actually, when I was writing the two novels "Crematorium" and "The Death Sent-Offerer", both of which were about makeup artists, I came into contact with two makeup artists, one male and one female. In the past two or three years, I have been in contact with these two makeup artists because I want to know more. This time I went straight to Huang Chao. I don't know what will happen. Anyway, when I wrote "Crematorium", it brought me an income of 300,000 yuan. However, I was unlucky and lost the money, which led to mental problems.
I have always been a materialist, not a spiritualist. But because of this incident, I believe in the existence of many things that are beyond materialism.
I smoke three packs of cigarettes a day and never put down my wine. I am thinking about the completion of my final novel, telling more people about the origin of life and death, life and death, what is the end of death, and what does it look like? Is it true that lying there without knowing anything? No, it is not true. Before I understood this world, I thought that death was just a handful of dirt, forgetting the world before life. It is not true. When you die, you do not leave behind some of your life-time things, wishes, love, and thoughts. On the contrary, you leave behind double. It is true that the other side of death is life.
More people think about life, and death is death. In fact, death is a rebirth for you and a bigger beginning.
I didn't believe this at first. After it is burned, it's just a handful of ashes. There are still bones left after burning. Your relatives will hold the plate of ashes, let them cool down, put them into the urn, and then bury them or store them. In fact, all this is not the end, it's just a new beginning, and it's also a big cycle.
I didn’t know all this, but after meeting Ke Mingzhe, I knew that this is another world. Today I am telling you everything about this world, and I am not afraid. There are some things that cannot be said, just like what my readers said when they read “Crematorium” and “The Deathbed”, Lao Bing did not dare to write more, and some things were just written to the point. He was afraid of revenge, he was afraid of something, indeed, there are some things I dare not write. However, as the end of this novel, I will never go to the crematorium again, so I will say everything. I hope that everything goes well for me, and you will also give me many blessings.
I am obsessed with this. My friends and relatives all say that I am bewitched by ghosts and I am weird. They don’t like me like this. However, I want to know what the other world is like. I know and I want to tell everyone. No matter what, as the ending, I need to tell the truth and tell everything I know. I won’t keep too many fears and concerns like "Crematorium" and "Deathbed".
Am I afraid when writing this? Yes, but I drank and smoked while writing this work. Is this to reduce my fear? Yes, I admit it.
Ke Mingzhe is a person who wraps himself up. It is quite difficult to enter his inner world. I may not even be able to describe it as difficult. That world is unknown to outsiders, unknown to outsiders, and a secret that is not told to outsiders.
Ke Mingzhe was lonely and had almost no friends. I became his first friend. From the age of 22 to 36, I became his first real friend.
After fourteen years of loneliness, I finally found a friend. I let go and accepted everything about him. I could hold the hand that touched the corpse. It was as cold as ice, but I was not afraid. I also had a strange smell on his body, but I even thought it was a beautiful smell. Although he used perfume to cover it up, the smell could not be concealed. But I was not annoyed and I even slowly began to like it.
Ke Mingzhe is like a hedgehog. When he sees someone coming, he curls up into a ball with thorns all over his body, and you can't touch him.
The time I finally let him let go was after we had drunk eighteen times. That day he covered his face and cried, crying out fourteen years of loneliness, fourteen years of a kind of loneliness that could not be sustained. No one could do it for fourteen years, but he was the only one who could.
He adhered to his father's belief, which was to send children to their graves, a good deed.
From that day on, we were buddies. We slept in the same bed. His body was always cold, but I didn't feel annoyed at all. I declare here that we are not gay, just buddies. We both like women, especially beautiful women. Don't think too much.
I know the whole world of a refiner. We stayed together for three years, until Ke Mingzhe was 39 years old, got married and left this place. I knew everything. I wanted to write these things into a novel, but he always disagreed. He told me that if you tell the world inside, it will be like a secret of heaven, which will damage your body and even cause death. He disagreed, and he always disagreed. When I insisted on writing this novel, Ke Mingzhe had left China and settled in Australia. His son was already three years old. That is, seven years had passed, and I was 45 years old.
I insisted on writing it down, but he on the phone still wouldn't let me. He said it would bring bad luck. I insisted again, and he fell silent.
At the moment, he is living a happy life in Australia and has his own farm. He sent me beautiful photos of him.
This time I insisted, and he didn't say anything. Because I got his diary, and his father's diary. Like his father, Ke Mingzhe kept a diary almost every day during the days in the crematorium. This is what I admire. I held Ke Mingzhe and his father's ten thick diaries, and my heart was heavy. Before writing this novel, I had only read a small part of them. The novel I wrote below is a true record, and the words I wrote are all from Ke Mingzhe and his father Ke Zuo.
I will not exaggerate or embellish. I will just write the diary as it is. This is another diary-style novel. They say it is a diary-style novel, but I don’t know. All I know is that it is an original record of life, a record of another world that you don’t know.
I don’t know what the consequences will be if I publish these things. But when I was writing “Crematorium” and “Death Sitter”, my eyesight started to deteriorate. At the worst, I couldn’t see for three days. Now I walk with my right leg limped. This is a kind of damage to my body!
I hope that this "Refiner" will not bring me greater harm. I am just recording it truthfully so that everyone can see another world.
If you have read the novel, please send a blessing message. Ke Mingzhe said that it might have some effect. I hope that when I see you again, I will not be blind and can walk normally. My tears will pour down. (To be continued)