I am dead. My childhood was happy until I was seven years old, when I went to primary school. At that time, I went to He Dana's house for the first time. I went there by myself. The door was half open. I went in and stood at the door, looking at He Dana. He had aged a lot.
"Come and sit down."
I went over and sat down, and it was as if I had not died.
"What's your name?"
"Zhang Wen."
He Dana shuddered.
"It's you, Xiao Zuo."
"Yes, it's me, Xiao Zuo."
"Only you and I know about this matter. We can't talk about it. We can only watch and do it."
"Why haven't I forgotten my past life?"
"You have burned more than 300 people to death. If a refiner reaches this level, he will not forget his past life. This may be painful, but once you get used to it, it will be nothing."
"Maybe I'll get used to it. I want to see my son Xiaozhe."
"Of course, there is no problem with all this."
"I actually drank that day, but I only took one sip and I couldn't handle it."
When I got home, my father Zhang Liwen beat me. It was the first time he beat me because I was drunk and I was only seven years old.
I didn't resist.
I saw my son Xiaozhe, he was so tall. I followed him home that day. When I got home, my father wanted to beat me again because it was already past nine o'clock in the evening when I got home, and they were looking for me like crazy.
I felt the pain, it was really painful, but I could only see it but had no way to get close to it, or maybe one day I would.
The strangest thing happened. My father Zhang Liwen was transferred to the Cultural Bureau. A year later, he was transferred to the crematorium as the director. What was the reason for this
I'll go to He Dana again and ask about this.
"You have changed his fate. He will be a refiner in the future, burning people to death, which is the same profession as yours."
I was shocked.
"Why is this happening?"
"A person's destiny is not fixed, it can be changed by external factors. You have changed him."
"How can he be a refiner?"
"In a year, he will make a mistake and become a refiner down there."
"Is it okay not to do this?"
"No, some destinies are not fixed, but when you reincarnate into their family, it changes. They owe you a child, and the child is actually a debt paid off. I don't know in which life you owed them. Sometimes people say this, and it's true. Only if you owe them a debt can you meet them."
I didn't know that this was an unchangeable fact.
“So what will I be like in the future?”
"Refiner."
I rolled off the chair to the ground, got up, and stared at He Dana in a daze.
"Because you have the fate of being a continuous refiner for two lifetimes, and you can't escape that."
"Fuck you."
I cursed and left, but He Dana suddenly burst into laughter, which scared me.
After my father became the director of the field, people would come to him from time to time and say that I was smart. Damn it, how could I not be smart? I have not forgotten anything in my reincarnation. I even want to have a woman. I graduated from college, but I am still learning things from elementary school. I want to skip a grade.
I told my father and he looked at me blankly.
"I'll go straight to high school, and you can test me on my high school stuff."
My father almost fainted, he didn't believe it at all. My mother was also dumbfounded. They were both teachers and didn't believe in such things. In the first two years, I didn't dare show it and my grades were always average. They couldn't believe it.
My mother still gave me a few sets of college entrance examination questions and asked me to do them.
I sat there, doing my homework. The children's tables and chairs, and of course, my favorite food, were all there. It was a happy family, and it would have been a very good thing if I didn't remember my previous life.
I did four sets of questions while my mother and father watched me. They were sweating. Then my father suddenly picked me up and gave me a big kiss. This idiot, his beard pricked me so hard that it hurt.
My mother actually shed tears.
I became a child prodigy that year and was reported in newspapers and on television.
I took the college entrance examination that year and went to university. My mother accompanied me. I liked the university campus, the highest institution of learning in China.
I don’t want to say too much about my childhood. I will mention it bit by bit in my later diaries.
It wasn't until I was 22 years old and graduated with my postdoctoral degree that I started to play a little bigger, and I also stayed in the UK for three years.
However, I know that my fate is to be a refiner. I can't figure it out. How can I be a refiner? Isn't that crazy? This kind of reincarnation doesn't work like this. How can a postdoctoral student like me be a refiner
I don’t believe this. I have always been in contact with He Dana.
I work in Shanghai, as the general manager of a Fortune 500 company. When I go home to see my parents, I go to see Dana Ho. I have kept in touch with him over the years.
When He Dana saw me, he hugged me and cried. He was old.
We drank, and my alcohol tolerance remained the same.
I asked him about my work as a refiner, and he smiled and said.
"By next year, your father will already be a refiner."
"Yes, you are very accurate in your calculations. I didn't learn much about Yin science from you in my last life, but I'm afraid I will have to learn from you in this life."
I didn't expect that my son Xiaozhe would come in, and my emotions became a little unstable.
"Don't get excited, just be friends. If you bring things up, you'll be nothing."
My son Xiaozhe was a chemical refiner and now he is a makeup artist, but on the work sheet, it is written as chemical refiner.
I had a good chat with Xiaozhe, but I didn’t dare to say too much for fear that something might go wrong.
Xiaozhe only stayed for a short while that day and then left.
"A year later, I came back to be a refiner. Of course, it wasn't this crematorium, but the provincial crematorium. You appeared in the crematorium as the director, because you couldn't let go of the refining work. As the director, you also had to go into the refining room every month to cremate a body. Of course, you know what that feels like. Everyone feels different when cremating a body. Is it a sense of happiness? I don't know."
This kind of fate is really unacceptable to me. I studied architectural design and wanted to leave my buildings around the world. Unfortunately, this is my fate. We always say that people cannot fight against fate. It is true. There is really nothing we can do about it.
A year later, my father fell seriously ill. I went home to take care of him and found a job in this city.
Unexpectedly, someone recommended me to go to the province to research equipment.
I didn't want to go, but the province was only an hour's drive from the city, so I went anyway. I wanted to fix my job in the Northeast and take care of my father.
When I went there, what I was asked to study was the refining furnace. China's cremation system has been perfected, but the equipment has not been improved.
I was in a daze, and finally decided to do this job.
I couldn't escape. My father knew that I was working on the refining furnace, and he didn't object or say anything else.
What I didn't expect was that a year later, the refining furnace I designed and researched was put into operation, and I was sent to the provincial crematorium as the director to study the refining furnace on the spot. I had cremated dead bodies for so many years, and actually, that old furnace was really unbearable. I already had various ideas in my mind, and this time I completed them completely.
The refining furnace is completely automated and push-button operated. The corpses go in automatically without any human contact.
I was the one who started the first furnace. It was a woman who was burned. I hadn't burned a woman for a long time. The feeling gave me a thrill and even made my blood rush. It was a feeling that is hard to describe.
He Dana is right, this is my fate.
I work in the province, and my father and mother also came to the province.
The equipment has been put into use across the country. My son Xiaozhe also uses my refining furnace. Of course, I don’t know whether he knows it or not.
I became a refiner again, which makes me feel uncomfortable. As a refiner in two lifetimes, won’t you let me do something else
I go back once a month to see Dana Ho and my son Xiaozhe.
That day, my boss called me to the office.
"Xiao Wen, it's a bit of a waste of your talent to put you there, but you have indeed made achievements. Your level is only one level lower than mine. Continue your research and make the most advanced refining equipment in the world. I have to burn it anyway. As for the incomplete burning of the ashes, I hope there will be progress on this. Another thing is that you go to the crematorium in Suoyang City. People are waiting downstairs. Something happened there. Go and take a look at the refining furnace."
I frowned.
I went downstairs and got into the car. It turned out to be my son Xiaozhe, the director of Ke's crematorium. I knew that my son was the director. Their newly built crematorium was said to be quite good. Although the provincial crematorium was large, it was built twenty years ago and had never been renovated for many reasons.
I shook hands with my son. Maybe this was the closest contact I had with him. I wanted to hug him, but it was too abrupt.
I'm a little excited.
When we arrived at the crematorium, it was really nice, just like a hotel.
Entering the refinery, I saw familiar equipment, all modernized, and not a trace of dust in the refinery.
"Teacher Zhang, there is a problem with the device 1. It seems to be stuck, but we don't know what is stuck. We checked it, but couldn't find anything."
I took a look and there's nothing wrong with the equipment.
"After dark, when the furnace is shut down, we'll come back."
The refining furnaces are all working.
When we were having lunch together at noon, I tried to control myself from drinking too much, as I would have lost control.
After dark, Xiaozhe, I, and other people went into the refining room and the equipment room. We turned on the equipment. I took a look and found no problems. The equipment was stuck. Obviously there was a problem with the design, but I believed that there would be no problems with the equipment. I believed this and I believed in myself.
I crawled into the refining furnace. In fact, when it came to the old furnace, we always had to crawl into it because there were always problems with the equipment.
I had a familiar feeling, when I was burned, I was in the furnace, that feeling was not unfamiliar.
I found something stuck under the stove bar. I hit it with something and it was hard, like a bone. But there was no way a bone could get into the gap. It could only be ash. What on earth was going on? I don't know. I couldn't tell what it was.
"Get the tools."
The tools were brought to me, and I felt very familiar with this equipment, just like a part of my body. (To be continued)