All along, I didn't think I was that important in Feng Zhenyang's heart. I was probably just a spice in his luxurious life. After all, he had such good conditions that he could have found a rich girl who matched his appearance and talent, but he chose me. I once thought that it might be because he had never had it. Isn't it said that what you can't get is the best
But now, I can see that he is really sad. If he is not too sad, how can he drink like this? He is so drunk and still tells me that he is not sad. My heart is not made of stone. When I see him sad, my heart also hurts. I reach out and touch his face unconsciously. It is still that familiar face, and the breath is still so familiar.
Feng Zhenyang was drunk and his mind was not clear. He was still talking nonsense: "I'm really not sad! What is there to be sad about! I will find a 20-year-old girl next time! Um... I will piss you off to death!"
When Feng Zhenyang said this, he was holding my hand. When his palm touched my hand, I was shocked and quickly pulled my hand back. Although Feng Zhenyang was drunk, he was still slightly stunned by my action. He looked at me with a dazed look in his eyes and a silly smile on his lips: "Jiaying, can I sing a song for you? Let's sing a breakup song."
As he said that, Feng Zhenyang stumbled and tried to get up from the sofa. I was afraid that he would fall, so I quickly reached out to hold him up. But he was too heavy for me to hold him up. Not only did he fall on the sofa, but he also dragged me down with him. I just happened to lie on top of him, and... and it was mouth to mouth!
I was startled and hurriedly tried to get up, but Feng Zhenyang hugged me. His hands were around my waist, and as our lips pressed together, my teeth were pried open. My lips were silky and soft, and I was a little breathless. Feng Zhenyang was like a madman, hugging me tighter and tighter, as if he wanted to crush me. His kiss gradually changed from gentle to strong. I was almost suffocated by his kiss. After a long time, he slowly moved and pressed against my neck. His breath became particularly rapid and hot, and he said in my ear indistinctly: "Jiaying, I love you, tell me, you love me too..."
"I love you Feng Zhenyang." I thought that when he woke up, he wouldn't know what happened, so I just said what was in my heart. I hugged him tightly, tears welling up in my eyes, and even choked up when I spoke: "I love you, Feng Zhenyang, I love you, I love you."
I leaned on his shoulder and cried like crazy. I didn't want to cry. But for some reason, at that moment, all the past memories came to my mind. From high school to our marriage, there were obviously many bad things. The strange thing is that at this moment, all the memories in my mind were good.
The most profound thing is the song "Birch Forest" that Feng Zhenyang sang in the grove. At that time, he was afraid that I would be cold, so he hugged me. Because I would be afraid, he sang in my ear. The sentence that impressed me the most was this: "The birch forest is engraved with those two names. They swore to love each other for the rest of their lives."
I remember one day, he asked me, "Shen Jiaying, how about we go to the birch forest and carve our names? Carve our names on the entire birch forest? When we get old, we'll live in the birch forest."
When Feng Zhenyang said this to me, we met for the first time a few years after we graduated from high school. At that time, I just thought he was joking. Moreover, I was already married to Zhao Yicheng at that time, so I didn’t think much about it. I just thought he was joking and replied to him jokingly: "Who wants to live in a birch forest with you! My husband likes maple forests!"
Looking back now, Feng Zhenyang must have felt very bad at the time, especially when Zhao Yicheng came to pick me up after the show and went to the celebration banquet with us. Zhao Yicheng came over to greet Feng Zhenyang, extended his hand and introduced himself, saying, "Hello, I am Shen Jiaying's husband."
We didn't hide anything from our close friends in the circle. Because of our long-term friendship, I didn't hide anything from him. I still remember the look on Feng Zhenyang's face. He was very surprised, but then he smiled and stretched out his arm to shake hands with Zhao Yicheng, saying politely, "Hello, I am Shen Jiaying's high school classmate and deskmate."
Later, I don't know who ordered the song "My Deskmate". Feng Zhenyang didn't say a word from beginning to end. I asked him what happened. He said that his girlfriend dumped him. He also made up a story, saying that he had been with his girlfriend for many years, but his girlfriend ran away with someone else after a trip to the United States. Then he started to feel sad. Don't mention how sad he was.
At that time, I comforted him and told him that there are many beautiful women in the world, so why should you love one flower alone? I even asked Zhao Yicheng to comfort him. I thought that men would talk to each other better and understand each other better. Then Zhao Yicheng went to comfort Feng Zhenyang. Feng Zhenyang was still full of melancholy and was sad all night. As a result, I realized that he was talking nonsense the next day. I wanted to beat him to death.
Looking back now, his sadness was probably not fake, he was just looking for a reason to make himself sad. At this moment, Feng Zhenyang was really sad, and then when I said to him Feng Zhenyang I love you, he smiled again, he stroked my face gently, slightly showing his white teeth: "I know, Shen Jiaying you love me. You have me in your heart, I love you Shen Jiaying."
Feng Zhenyang was talking nonsense, and his lips came up to mine again. I felt like a slut, and I didn't reject him this time. I sat on his lap, put my arms around his neck, and responded gently and passionately. In the quiet living room, under the white light, we entangled with each other until late at night, when I leaned tiredly on his chest and listened to his heartbeat.
I felt extremely complicated. What on earth had I done? I was going to divorce Feng Zhenyang tomorrow, but on the eve of the divorce, I had sex with him? And he was drunk! He was drunk and impulsive, but I was not drunk!
Shen Jiaying, how can you be so cheap? He is not in a clear head but you are clear head! I really want to beat myself to death. I am no longer a young girl, but I can't control my emotions, let alone my body.
This night was long, yet so short. The next day, before Feng Zhenyang woke up, I had already dressed and made him his last breakfast. Because of last night, there was a faint sense of awkwardness in the air. Even if Feng Zhenyang was drunk, he would know what happened when he woke up and saw the sober person in front of him.
"Jiaying, actually I..."
"I wish you happiness." I interrupted him, and Feng Zhenyang stopped talking. On the way to the Civil Affairs Bureau, we didn't say a word. I lowered my head, and Feng Zhenyang also lowered his head.
Finally, after we came out of the Civil Affairs Bureau, we stood on the street for a long time, staring at each other in silence. I didn't know what to say, probably because there was no other divorced couple as weird as Feng Zhenyang and I, who had sex on the eve of divorce and went to the Civil Affairs Bureau to divorce together the next day.
When I left, I didn't ask for anything. Those were Feng's things, so I naturally had no right to share anything. At that moment, I thought that Feng Zhenyang and I would never have anything to do with each other again in this life, but I never thought... In the end, it was still a tangled mess.
The second month after divorcing Feng Zhenyang, I left Beijing. Shen Shiqi and Qi Xiaoyu also left with me. We moved to Hong Kong as a family. We thought everything was just a dream. The only difference was that after waking up from the dream, my mother was gone, and Qi Xiaoyu was beside Shen Shiqi. Shen Shiqi said that Qi Xiaoyu's brother came back not long ago. Several of them had been secretly searching for evidence of Lin Xuejing's crimes. Before long, Lin Xuejing would have to go to prison.
Then he added, "So sister, you don't have to worry about anything! Leave Lin Ruoxue's affairs to me! There are some things that you can't bear to do if you ask me to do them."
Yes, I couldn't bear it, and I was struggling for a long time to divorce Feng Zhenyang. In the end, I agreed to Shen Shiqi's suggestion and left for a while. Maybe I needed to calm down. Although I wanted revenge in my heart, I still planned to leave for the time being.
Perhaps it was not until this moment that I realized that I was not as courageous as I imagined. The law cannot punish Lin Ruoxue. If I wanted to kill her, I might not be able to do it. Even if I killed her, I might pay a heavy price for it. It might not be me, but maybe Shen Shiqi, or my father.
During the initial period of time after I left, I thought of many ways to retaliate against Lin Ruoxue, such as public opinion, but I never thought that she would die in such a tragic way. Before I could do anything, she died first. Perhaps this is the so-called retribution. While her public opinion did not appear, I was burdened with public opinion, from a female liar who cheated to marry into a wealthy family to a poor woman who was betrayed by her husband.
It doesn't matter what it is. I don't care anymore. I just want to live happily and peacefully with my family. In the fourth year after I left, I moved behind the scenes and found a godfather. His surname is Zhu, and his name is Zhu Jingye. Yes, Zhu Jingye is indeed my godfather. Apart from the close father-daughter relationship, that is, the close master-disciple relationship, there is really nothing else between us.
In order to attract attention, the media wrote all kinds of nonsense about the relationship between Zhu Jingye and I, saying that Zhu Jingye and I had a child. The most speechless thing is that some people also said that I divorced Feng Zhenyang because I was pregnant with Zhu Jingye's child.
I didn't explain much about these, and Zhu Jingye was even more unwilling to pay attention. As he said, the innocent are innocent, so why bother with ordinary people? The more you pay attention to them, the more excited they become.
"Teacher Shen, aren't you angry about those unscrupulous media outlets defaming you and Uncle Zhu?" Xiaomi's face was filled with indignation. She clutched the pen in her hand and said indignantly, "These reporters who talk nonsense should have their hands chopped off!!"
I have been through so much that I don't care about those messy gossips anymore. I smiled and shook my head and said, "Why should I be angry? I live for myself, not to please those irrelevant people. Why should I care about their opinions?"
Hearing this, Xiaomi was silent for a moment, then asked, "So what happened later? You never met Mr. Feng again? Do you regret meeting Mr. Feng?"
"I regretted it before, but now, I don't regret it at all." I really didn't regret it at all. I smiled, waved to my father and Xiaofeng who were standing at the door, and turned around to say goodbye to Xiaomi: "Let's stop here today, I have something else to do."
"Mom, grandpa bought me a really big apple today! I brought it here for you to eat!" Xiaofeng ran over excitedly with a bright red apple in his hand and threw himself into my arms, saying in a baby voice, "Mom, uncle said that dad will come to see Xiaofeng today, is that true?" (To be continued)