In the third year of Longshuo, Mobei.
The seventh day of July.
With a bang, the door panel was knocked open in the howling wind. Shan Chao dragged a sack of things into the door, not noticing that the edge of the sack squeezed against the door frame, making a few creaks and cracks.
The door frame made of mud and wooden slats was squeezed and deformed.
Shan Chao: "..."
The half-grown man was stunned for a while, dragged the sack into the back kitchen, and tried to close the door when he came back, but he couldn't close it no matter what. Reluctantly, he had to pick up two stones to block the door. With the dust all over his head and face, he returned to the stove confidently.
The contents of the sack are as follows: oil, salt, beans, spices, rice noodles, two fat hares, a precious apple bought in a market, and several small pink flowers with soil still on them.
Shan Chao wiped the flowers and kept them in a bowl, washed the apples, took a deep breath of the fruit's fragrance, and offered it devoutly on the table; then he rolled up his sleeves and slaughtered rabbits and roasted meat. Half an hour later, in the small earthen house There was a strong meaty aroma.
In the evening, Xie Yun came back from hunting, tied the horse to the backyard to let it graze, and pushed the door of the house.
Squeak-boom!
The door panel fell firmly to the ground, splashing dust half a person's height.
Even the brows and the corners of Xie Yun's mouth were twitching slightly. After a while, he raised his eyes and saw the youthful and vigorous apprentice sitting in the room, rubbing his hands uneasily, and said, "I'll... come to repair right away."
Xie Yun's eyes fell on the table, and he was surprised to find that there was a plate of braised rabbit meat, a plate of peeled and cut apples, two bowls of bean porridge with dry biscuits, and dinner was already ready.
"… You did it?"
"En, um." Shan Chao flatteringly pushed the plate of apples towards Xie Yun: "Master, eat."
Xie Yun was speechless for a moment, and went to eat. The stomach of an adolescent boy is a bottomless pit, piles of sharp meat disappear in the blink of an eye, Xie Yun slowly put down his chopsticks, only to see Shan Chao get up and go to the backyard to find tools, taking advantage of the last rays of the setting sun, squatting at the door and jingling Repair the door.
Xie Yun picked up the fruit and walked over, picked up a piece and fed it to him: "Yeah."
Shan Chao shook his head to avoid it: "I have eaten."
"...?"
"I've eaten it."
Shan Chao cut the wooden wedge and stood up the door panel. Just as he was about to carefully aim at the eyes, his jaw was suddenly pulled by a force, and a piece of sweet and juicy fruit was forcefully stuffed into his mouth.
Xie Yun mocked: "What you gnawed was skin!"
As night fell, the oil lamps were blown out, and the moonlight leaked into the house through the gaps in the wooden boards on the windows. Shan Chao got up from the floor lightly, picked up the bowl of pink flowers soaked in water on the window sill, and put it on the head of the bed.
Xie Yun's sleeping face was fair and calm, as clear as water, and he could even feel the soft texture of his lips.
"..." Shan Chao swallowed, forcibly suppressed the urge to kiss, and said silently in his heart: "Happy Qixi Festival, Master."
·
In the third year of Xianheng, the Western Regions.
"Wow-"
"Don't flip, don't flip, look again!"
"Tut tsk tsk..."
Shan Chao lifted the curtain of the military tent with the tip of his knife, and said coldly, "What are you shouting about?"
A few soldiers hurriedly hid something behind them. Shan Chao's sharp eyes saw that it looked like an atlas, and his eyes immediately sank: "What is it, a map? Bring it!"
The ending sound contained internal strength, and everyone was terrified immediately. A moment later, the leader of the soldiers tremblingly held the album in both hands and sent it forward. Shan Chao took it and flipped through it casually, but was stunned.
That was not a map of the military camp drawn privately, but a book of pornography.
"..." The scene was silent, Shan Chao expressionless, snapped the naked man and woman together, stuffed them into the arms of the soldiers, turned and went back to the tent.
It was night, Shan Chao was tossing and turning on the couch, unable to sleep, some fiery impulse was rushing left and right deep in his heart.
After a long while, he finally got out of bed, quietly got out of the main tent, and tiptoed to the tent where the soldiers slept. He had practiced his lightness kung fu to the point where his footsteps made no sound. He bent down and got into the tent. In the darkness, he could only hear a few snores around him one after another, and strange sounds like grinding teeth, scratching and farting from time to time.
Shan Chao rummaged in the dark for a long time, during which he crushed several bugs to death, kicked several buttocks, stepped on countless times, and finally found the target from under the pillow of a soldier.
"Hey-"
With a single effort, Shan Chao pulled out the Erotic Figure like a tug-of-war, and ran away without looking back.
Wow, Shan Chao nestled under the quilt, turning a page expressionlessly under the dim light of the oil lamp.
Most of the small picture albums circulated in the wilderness are shoddy, and they are incomparable to the lifelike and exquisite painted erotic palaces of Chang'an, the capital. But this is the first time for Shan Chao to observe the erotic pictures in detail. After staring at the villain with hands and feet as slender as noodles on the page for a long time, a question that has been hidden for a long time finally gradually surfaced in his mind.
Why are the women in the pictures so ecstatic
Isn't this painful, patient, and purely sacrificial for the one who bears it
All the sexual education in adolescence comes from Shan Chao who spent a brief night in the cave eight years ago. Under an oil lamp in the northwest of Wanli, he stared at the naked little man in front of him, and then recalled the painful Xie Yun under him that night. , My head was full of doubts and it was about to explode.
·
Hanging for three years, Chang'an.
"Report!"
"Khitan was defeated, our army returned to Beijing, and the regent is back!"
The trophies looted from the Khitan king's tent were transported back to the mansion in carts, the crowd was full of laughter and joy, and the long street in the distance was resounding with festive firecrackers. Xie Yun pushed open the gate of the courtyard, and at the entrance of the alley, he saw a war horse approaching swiftly, stopped in front of him in a blink of an eye, and stomped heavily on the ground with a "Woo-" sound.
The general dismounted like a whirlwind, and dropped his helmet casually, revealing a handsome face with sharp and profound features that made people's heart skip a beat.
Xie Yun stood in front of the courtyard with folded arms. Although he really wanted to keep a straight face, the corners of his mouth curled up slightly. He was about to say something, but he was suddenly hugged in the face: "Hey! There are people outside! Let me down... "
Like a bandit who robbed Mrs. Yazhai, Shan Chao carried Xie Yun all the way to the inner room, throwing him on the couch.
"You..." Before Xie Yun could sneer and scold, Shan Chao knelt on one knee and magically conjured a jewel flower out of his pocket.
"It was stolen from the booty." Shan Chao smiled, and the sly expression in his eyes was clear: "Send it to you."
The flower's branches are made of gold, and the leaves are made of emerald. The petals are all large and translucent pigeon blood red, and they are entwined with gold threads to form the shape of petals. When the sun shines, it is radiant. Xie Yun took it over and looked at it for a moment, his side face and fingers glowed white against the ruby, Shan Chao just stared, unable to move his eyes away.
"March all the way in a hurry, hurry up and hurry up, and finally come back in time for the Qixi Festival." Shan Chao held Xie Yun's hand and whispered: "Someone from the palace asked me to go to the banquet, so I don't want to go with those sour words. The jealous civil servants are entertaining... "
Xie Yun shook the flower branch, and asked with interest: "When did you win?"
"The end of May."
"When will we break camp?"
"Early June."
"How long did it take to go all the way?"
"About twenty days."
Xie Yunfan suddenly changed his face, pinched Shan Chao's chin and asked: "When I went, I only walked for twenty days with food, grass and luggage, and I walked for a whole month when I came back?! Who is it?!"
The poor Prince Regent's handsome face was pinched and distorted, and he felt full of unjust grievances: "Too many things have been robbed! The escort car can't go fast at all! The Khitan royals are not acclimatized all day long, have diarrhea and vomit blood... I have already urged them desperately …”
Xie Yun inserted the gem flower into Shan Chao's bun, turned his back slowly, crossed his legs and propped his forehead, and started to play cold war.
Shan Chao wore a flower on his head, walked around the bed twice awkwardly, and suddenly thought of something, he took out something from his armor pocket, and squeezed his ass to Xie Yun's side: "Daughter-in-law, look at this. "
Xie Yun said smoothly: "Who are you... what?"
"I saw it in the Khitan harem, the accompanying military doctor said..." Shan Chao whispered in Xie Yun's ear, and then opened the cap of the glass bottle in his hand, only to see the pink oily ointment in the bottle, as delicate and soft as silk , A scent of roses rushed to my face immediately: "The secret medicine of the palace, worth a thousand gold, and a special tribute to the Khitan harem! The military medical item is used as a guarantee, and the effect is not good. Come and see..."
Xie Yun immediately wanted to stay on the bed with all his hands and feet, but Shan Chao squeezed him into the corner of the bed with all his strength. The young couple pushed and shoved for a long time like fighting, and finally the regent took advantage of the equipment and size to successfully hold the commander of the imperial army under him. While biting his red ear, he dug out a large lump of precious grease , vaguely said: "Hey - master, let the apprentice serve you for the Qixi Festival..."
Lingering all night, hmmmm, early the next morning, the commander of the Imperial Army sat in front of the window with his clothes folded, his face flushed in the morning light, and he turned a blind eye to Shan Chao who was wearing his belt and smiling teasingly.
"Master?" Shan Chao raised his sword eyebrows, picked up the gemstone flower that had been thrown on the ground, leaned over and pinned it to Xie Yun's temple, with a playful light in his eyes: "I'm still satisfied with my apprentice's Qixi Festival gift, Ok?"
The two looked at each other for a while, and Xie Yun resentfully said: "The head of the military doctor... is temporarily saved." As he spoke, he turned around slowly, resting his forehead, and started playing cold war again with his face flushed.