A teen with Asperger's once used a metaphor to describe how different he was from normal people.
He said that the riots of ordinary people are like the windows operating system running in the socialized world, and the brain of Asperger's disease is only running slowly under the dos system.
In addition to being slow, all kinds of errors can occur.
This is a fact that can never be changed, a defect that will never be erased by following him for the rest of his life.
No matter how dull Tan Mo is, he can understand that Qiao Lan was helping himself just now. After she helped him not let others find out that he was standing up, she was still not a normal person.
Tan Mo suddenly thought of a word.
Happy not thinking about Shu.
The temporary stability and intoxication made him a little overwhelmed.
In the evening class that night, Tan Mo's kickboxing coach clearly felt Tan Mo's irritability. Although his face was still expressionless, the strength in his hands was clearly venting.
This young man is the most cruel and desperate one of the students he has taught. Like something is behind him desperately urging him, the coach sometimes asks Tan Mo a few words out of curiosity, but Tan Mo has never been anything. Say.
The coach didn't expect Tan Mo to say anything today, but he casually asked if something happened today.
The young man, who was gradually no longer thin, still clenched his fists, but his movements stopped.
He stood there for a long time, and suddenly spoke, his voice was very low, not so much to tell but to ask himself.
"What would you do if there was someone you couldn't catch in your entire life."
A person who is extremely poor and can't catch up in his whole life
Although the coach didn't know what Tan Mo's identity and wealth were, he could see that Tan Mo's identity was definitely not simple just by looking at Tan Mo's wealth and the fact that the car he picked up every day was a daydream that he never dared to imagine.
A girl who can make this young man feel that he can't catch up no matter how much he pursues in his life, what kind of fairy or eldest lady
If it was him, since he knew how to chase him, he wouldn't be able to chase after him.
The coach said without thinking, "Then stop chasing."
As soon as the words fell, the coach saw the boy who had been expressionless, instantly infected with a ferocious aura, and his eyes were full of gloom.
The coach, who had grown a very muscular body, was taken aback by the boy's sudden emotional change.
Although he didn't have time to think clearly, the coach quickly changed his tune.
"Actually, what I'm more curious about is, why do I think I can't catch up?" Look at you, you look so handsome and have such a good family background, a lot of little girls came to ask WeChat, such a superior condition, so determined I can't catch up, isn't it
"Have you chased it before? The girl you like didn't agree?"
The boy was silent for a moment, then said solemnly, "No."
never chased.
Coach: So after a long time, I still have a crush!
"Since you've never caught up, how do you know you can't catch up? Do you know each other?"
"know."
"Then, the relationship is bad?"
"very good."
"How good is it?"
"most."
"Then go after him." The coach was anxious for Tan Mo when he heard it.
Tan Mo lowered his eyelashes and shook his head, "No."
Why can't it work
The coach doesn't understand.
"She treats me as a friend."
"How normal", the coach thinks it's nothing at all, "How many couples develop from friends, although I don't know what's going on between the two of you, but I don't think you need to be so negative."
"My opinion is that everything should always be tried. Since it has never been pursued, it cannot be concluded that it is impossible." The coach didn't know what to say at first, but he didn't expect to become eloquent as soon as he opened his mouth, incarnate as a lover,
"Because you think you can't catch up, so you never catch up, you'll never catch up, but if you try, of course it may be what you think, but if you catch it, right, if! If I It's you, there is a girl who likes to the bottom of my heart, I just go and try it, try my best to chase it once, and if I really can't catch up, then forget it, at least I won't regret it in retrospect"
No regrets
Tan Mo suddenly wanted to laugh.
He didn't want to leave any regrets, but if Qiao Lan discovered his thoughts, he would become a stranger from now on.
Compared with regret, this is the ending that he can't accept.
The coach was still eloquently saying that according to Tan Mo's conditions, there is no need to be so unconfident, maybe that girl would have liked him long ago.
Tan Mo closed his eyes and made an understatement, the coach instantly shut up.
The coach was stunned for a long time before he said, "Sick?"
Tan Mo has to have a physical examination almost every few days, and his body is absolutely fine.
"What disease?"
Tan Mo chewed the three words in his mouth for a long time before saying it with difficulty, "mental illness."
coach:"???"
Moved back completely unconsciously.
Tan Mo glanced at the coach coldly. Although he didn't say anything, the coach understood the ridicule in Tan Mo's eyes.
Look, no matter how much you just said, everyone will stay away from him when they learn that he has such a condition.
The coach suddenly reacted, remembering the unconscious action he just made, and suddenly wanted to slap himself. He wanted to explain, but felt that it was useless to say anything at this time.
The subconscious reaction is the real reaction.
So it was for this reason that Tan Mo felt that the girl would never like him and accept him, and the coach felt that everything could be explained.
"I'm sorry, I really didn't mean it." Forget it, it's all white explanation, not to mention that Tan Mo doesn't care about his opinion. The coach sighed, "So that girl doesn't know you're sick?"
"Know."
Know
The coach was surprised.
After a long while, the coach finally said seriously, "I think the girl who can make you like so much must have something different from others. You don't have to use the rest of us to judge her thoughts. I know your situation, but she is still good to you and the best for you, which shows that she may not care whether you are sick or not."
Tan Mo stared into the distance with deep eyes, but did not speak.
The coach sighed, "Tan Mo, maybe, I mean maybe, you are more important than you think in the heart of the girl you like."
The conversation was over, Tan Mo stood up again and started to practice, his technique was still sharp, but it was finally a little less ruthless than before.
Tan Mo's learning content, in addition to the normal schoolwork and free fighting, there are two more.
One stock, one sentiment analysis.
Tan Mo started contacting stocks after learning that Qiao Lan was interested in investing in stocks.
Qiao Lan said that because she admired the biography of the stock god, she wanted to learn, and Tan Mo made a decision in one sentence.
He always wants to use various methods to make Qiao Lan have more feelings for him, even if it is not love, and besides that, Qiao Lan is very interested in stock trading, he can learn first, and then slow down Slowly teach Qiao Lan.
But what makes Tan Mo very happy is that after he really got into stock trading, using mathematics and various analyses, Tan Mo found out that this matter was much more interesting than he thought.
It's just so much fun.
In addition, Tan Mo began to frantically learn emotional analysis.
He endured the discomfort and began re-contacting and taking advice from a psychiatrist to become more of a "normal person."
He can never be a normal person, but he can try to make it invisible to others that he is not a normal person.
It's an incredibly tough and lifelong study.
The psychiatrist gave him a book dedicated to the symptoms of Asperger's, which identified 412 human emotions and divided them into 24 different groups.
What he needs to do is to memorize all these 412 emotions and memorize them in his heart. He doesn't understand, so he will memorize them and remember the expressions and actions that each emotion will show.
When a person cries, what he needs to do, he doesn't know, then memorize it, when someone laughs, what he should do, all in mind.
In just a few days, Tan Mo felt exhausted physically and mentally.
Because he didn't understand, he could only search in the memory bank for how other people should react after seeing a certain expression of a person.
He must be fast, because if he is slower, some people will think he is slow, and no one knows how fast Tan Mo's brain has been running in just a few seconds.
Too tired, because the nerves are highly tense every moment, Tan Mo feels that he is tired of being tired by everyone.
But the effect was unexpectedly good.
Tan Mo is absorbing knowledge frantically and turning himself into a master of imitation. In the fastest time, he can make correct responses to all kinds of the most conventional expressions.
Some people say that Tan Mo is no longer expressionless, and some people say that Tan Mo is really not difficult to communicate with, only Qiao Lan, when everyone thinks that Tan Mo has become more and more gregarious, feels a strong sense of unease and sympathy. Violation.
Tan Mo began to grow savagely in a space that Qiao Lan had never noticed.
Only when facing Qiao Lan, can he show a fairly real him because of the uncontrollable throbbing in his heart.
Qiao Lan asked him what was wrong, but Tan Mo could lie calmly.
He said that he received treatment from a psychiatrist, and it may have been different recently because the psychiatrist asked him to do so.
Eighty percent of the half-truths are true. This is indeed the advice of a psychiatrist, but Tan Mo did not tell Qiao Lan that the psychiatrist had warned him another sentence at the beginning.
Doctors say that when adults with Asperger's disease use their imitative abilities, they can communicate like normal people, and they even start to be handy and popular. Everything seems to be good, but that will be the beginning of disaster.
Because the whole world will become indistinguishable.
It used to be a slow analysis to analyze the other party's true thoughts, but then there will be no further analysis, relying on the knowledge and experience to guess the other party's thoughts and make a relative response.
From then on, really, I can't understand anything anymore.