The Maier Bar is at the deepest part of the bar street, Xu Ran's attire is out of place with the whole street, let alone a pair of crutches. When he entered the door, the doorman was surprised to see him, and almost stopped him outside. Fortunately, a clerk came up to him and asked politely, "Are you Mr. Xu Ran?"
"It's me." Xu Ran nodded in panic, watching the clerk leading the way ahead.
He Cheng collapsed on the sofa in the private room, and the clerk squatted beside him after entering, and said softly, "Mr. He, Mr. Xu is here."
He Cheng didn't respond.
Xu Ran stood at the door, looking at the man lying on the sofa with complicated emotions.
I haven't seen him for a month, and He Cheng has lost weight, and the wrinkles between his brows are getting deeper, it must be because he has worried a lot. The clerk wanted to touch his shoulder, but He Cheng shook him off.
Xu Ran walked over slowly, sat down on the edge of the sofa with difficulty, and put his hands on his eyelids.
The slightly higher temperature and the cold palm formed a strong contrast, He Cheng moved uncomfortably, and grabbed his wrist.
Xu Ran shook, moved his hand away, and saw He Cheng staring at him with a pair of eagle eyes.
Suppressing the uneasiness in his heart, Xu Ran said softly before he said anything harsh, "You're drunk, come home with me, okay?"
He Cheng narrowed his eyes and looked at him for a while, then shook his hands and sat up.
Xu Ran breathed a sigh of relief. He Cheng is very obedient when he is drunk, as long as he obeys his wishes, it is actually not difficult to manipulate.
The clerk sent them all the way to the roadside for a taxi, and then said to Xu Ran, "Mr. He just wanted to call you before he fell asleep. I'm really sorry to bother you."
He looked at Shuangguai meaningfully, Xu Ran smiled, "It doesn't matter."
He Cheng closed his eyes in the back seat to rest his mind, Xu Ran hesitated, and told the driver the address of the house they used to live together.
The community was quiet, Xu Ran and He Cheng walked towards the house one after the other, the evening breeze was blowing, blowing through the silence and desolation.
They are rarely this quiet. When he reached the door, Xu Ran touched his pocket and realized that the key had been returned, so he asked He Cheng, "Do you... have the key here?"
He Cheng pushed him away, and stepped forward to open the door.
The house still remained as it was when Xu Ran packed up and left, even the trash can on the ground was still there, it seemed that He Cheng hadn't been here for a long time. Xu Ran has no choice, he only knows this place.
"Okay, go wash up and have a good sleep, I'll buy you some supper, eat some if you're hungry."
Xu Ran softly coaxed He Cheng, who had a bad face, like coaxing an awkward child.
Unexpectedly, just as he was about to leave, he was grabbed by the wrist.
When he turned his head and met those eyes that were as deep as water, Xu Ran's heart skipped a beat. The strength on the wrist was the same as usual, and it hurt him a lot. Xu Ran wanted to pull his hand back, but He Cheng dragged him into the bedroom.
"Wait, He Cheng!"
It's been a long time since he called He Cheng's name all the way, and He Cheng's reaction made him shudder. I don't know where this man got so much strength, maybe it's because of the huge difference in physical strength, He Cheng threw him directly onto the bed with a flick of his hand.
Being pinned by the crutches, Xu Ran's eyes were filled with tears of pain, and before he could get up, a black shadow fell from his head.
"Wait, don't...!"
Xu Ran struggled. He sadly found that this man's oppression had become instinctive, and he directly clamped his right leg between his own, and he could break it by sitting back a little. looked at him.
He Cheng didn't speak, Xu Ran was most afraid of him not speaking, at this moment He Cheng was scarier than the devil.
"Get up... talk to me if you have something to say."
Xu Ran pushed him, but He Cheng didn't move.
He Cheng narrowed his eyes, looked at his face carefully, and asked hoarsely after a while, "Xu Ran?"
"It's me." Xu Ran responded tremblingly, wary of the slap that might hit his face at any moment.
The raised hand didn't come down for a long time, He Cheng just frowned, as if he was looking at a stranger.
"Xu Ran." He confirmed.
Suddenly he raised the corner of his mouth and laughed.
"You good-for-nothing..." he cursed under his breath.
Xu Ran's heart turned cold, and he still pushed him, muttering, "Yes, I'm a useless piece of trash, no one can compare to... just let me go, okay?"
"Let you go?" He Cheng finally responded, but he sneered, "I haven't had enough fun, why should I let you go?"
I haven't had enough.
Xu Ran stared blankly at the man pressing on him. He doesn't know He Cheng anymore, this guy who looks contemptuous but still oppresses him, is he really the man he has loved for ten years
Please, Xu Ran trembled and said silently in his heart, save me some face, don't kill them all.
He went to push He Cheng's hand, but it was pressed tighter and tighter. Unbearable, he whispered, "He Cheng, I'm not your airplane cup!"
As soon as the words came out, both of them were stunned.
The corners of He Cheng's mouth slowly opened, like a slow-motion replay, gradually solidified into an expression that looked like a smile but not a smile.
"Aeroplane cup?" He Chengju stared at him condescendingly, and paused every word, "Do you think you are an airplane cup?"
"... isn't it?"
Even the ducks in Bar Street have more dignity than him. Xu Ran knew that he was delusional, but even if he had some self-esteem, he would not be trampled on again and again. It's nothing more than a masturbation cup.
It's just that love is miserable, and I can't see it, and I can't let it go.
He Cheng seldom shows his drunken state in front of others, Xu Ran also finds it fresh when he sees it. Maybe it was this strangeness that stimulated him, or maybe it was because he had already decided to leave. The combination of various emotions made him bolder than ever.
He pushed He Cheng away forcefully, sat up, and rubbed his throbbing right leg.
He Cheng who fell on the bed was stunned for a moment, and suddenly laughed.
"...Xu Ran, Xu Ran, you really think highly of yourself."
Suddenly, he turned over and jumped up, and pressed Xu Ran back on the bed, his warm breath hit his ear, "Don't you think you have been a masturbation cup for the past ten years? Then come and fulfill the obligation of a masturbation cup."
The heart was pulled so hard that it was almost torn off from the body and scattered all over the ground. Xu Ran just watched him peel off his clothes, revealing his thin and pale chest, and then the trousers, which were pulled by He Cheng for a long time, and the buttons left a scarlet mark across his lower abdomen.
"He Cheng." Xu Ran could barely hear his own voice, and just called him calmly for the first time.
He Cheng raised his hazy drunken eyes and stared at him fiercely.
"What are you... what are you?"
He repeated these words over and over again, as if he could burn them into his flesh and blood by saying too much. He Cheng gnawed Xu Ran's body mercilessly, leaving a few blushes on his neck.
Xu Ran didn't struggle, just hugged He Cheng's head, and murmured softly, "It hurts."
It hurts.
Without lubrication and foreplay, of course he couldn't get in, and He Cheng couldn't get hard either. After tossing around for a while and making a mess all over the bed, he turned his body on one side and just fell asleep like that.
Xu Ran stared at the ceiling until the breathing of the people around him became long, then turned over and held He Cheng in his arms.
He put He Cheng's head on his chest and let him listen to his heartbeat.
"He Cheng, I'm leaving."
Reading softly, tears flowed down unconsciously.
"Stop being self-willed, others will dislike you." He kissed He Cheng's hair, "They won't spoil you, only me, you know, only I will let you bully. After so many years, you It should be bullied enough."
"I know you like Joan, promise me, if he leaves again, go after him, okay?"
"Chase him well, stay with him well, and don't be separated again."
"You're not a bad person, I understand, you're just stubborn and refuse to give in, you can't do that to Joan, you have to pamper him, just like before, you know?"
He Cheng in his arms uttered a drunken raving, and leaned into his arms.
Xu Ran stroked his eyebrows tremblingly, and lingered on the high bridge of his nose with his fingertips.
"I love you... do you know that I love you?"
A mournful cry came out of his throat, Xu Ran quickly covered his mouth to prevent himself from crying.
He trembled uncontrollably, he couldn't even hold He Cheng with his hands. Afraid that the shaking would wake him up too much, he let go a little. He Cheng in his sleep felt restrained, turned over and left his embrace.
There was a coldness between the empty arms.
Xu Ran got up slowly, with a strange calmness, straightened his clothes and trousers, and picked up his crutches. He took out his wallet, pulled out a bank card from it, and put it on the table.
Six hundred thousand. This was all the money that He Cheng had given him in the past ten years, not a cent more, not a cent less. He kept it for He Cheng from the very beginning, never thought that there would be a day when he would give it away.
I will pay you back what I owe you over the years.
He leaned down and kissed He Cheng's forehead, eyes, cheeks, and lips for the last time, and held his hand tightly for the last time. His knuckle fingers were so hard that they turned white, but they didn't leave any marks in He Cheng's palm.
He covered He Cheng with the quilt, and said softly, "Take care."
The footsteps of leaving were tragic and decisive, Xu Ran didn't look back, he walked out of the house like this, came outside the building, and then fell down on the amusement facilities in the small square.
Tears had already burst, blurring vision. Xu Ran allowed himself to cry, but he didn't cry out. His voice was hoarse, and he couldn't make a sound at all.
After crying for an unknown amount of time, the evening wind had already blown through his entire body and dried the tears on his face. He stared blankly at the pitch-black night sky. After a while, he took out his mobile phone and refunded the train ticket for the 4th of next month.
Buy a ticket again, the departure time is tomorrow morning.
Standing up, only one word flashed through Xu Ran's mind - escape.
Escape from the house that has never been warm, escape from these troubled years, escape from this hellish world.
In this life, let him be a coward for the last time.
At eight o'clock the next morning, He Cheng was woken up by Bai Jinming's phone call.
He sat up, frowned and looked at the chaotic bedroom, and it took a long time before he picked up the phone.
"He Cheng? Where did you go last night? Are you alone?"
He Cheng clutched his hangover head and said impatiently, "If I'm not alone, can I still be a ghost? I'm at home!"
"... Xu Ran sent you back?"
The memory of last night gradually became clear, He Cheng's expression changed, he rolled over and got out of bed, but saw the bank card on the bedside table at a glance.
Over there, Bai Jinming was still asking, "Where did Xu Ran go? He called me last night and I didn't answer it, and now I can't get in touch again. Could it be that he..."
"he's gone."
In the deathly silence, Bai Jinming laughed dryly, unbelievable, "What did you say?"
He Cheng held the bank card, stood by the window, looked at the bright sky outside, and said slowly, "He's gone."
The rabbit that escaped from the wolf's mouth, with its wounds all over its body, fled for its life in the distance, or killed itself.
Anyway, he's gone.
The author has something to say: Thanks to the mines of Ning Seventeen