The cold river water surrounded us from all directions.
The dark sky, the freezing cold river water, and broken pieces of ice sliding across the skin on my face and hands.
Everything is hidden in fear and powerless struggle.
The breath disappeared, and despair spread throughout the body.
I kept sinking, my body was torn apart and filled with icy river water.
Na Chen could feel himself slowly going down, down and down. His body was unable to resist and he kept sinking with the current and drifting away.
He raised his hand, trying to grab something, but when his fingertips moved forward, there were only chaotic waves. He clenched his fist weakly.
Chenchen, did you see it? Stars.
Not seen.
Why can't you see it
How can't you see it
Na Chen, you are nothing.
You are totally redundant.
Look, look!
You don't have to do this, no one needs you to do this.
I don't want to see you.
Mommy will take you over there, okay
No, I don't want to look at the stars.
Why do you want to make your mother sad...
I never needed you to exist.
Very cold. Scared.
Mom, I'm scared.
Don’t be afraid, Chenchen will be obedient.
He moved his hands in the water a few times, but was still unable to resist the force of falling downwards.
Are you going to die
Just sink to the bottom and you won’t know anything.
Let it all pass.
All over
Is there nothing left
All... gone
All is gone... right
I saw you perform at Boiling Point, you were a great drummer, can I have your phone number
Handsome guy, your wig fell off.
My name is Anhe.
Welcome to Xiao Chenchen's secret base.
…
Happy birthday.
Why give a piggy bank
It's not for you to save money, but for saving happy things.
I have saved a lot.
Na Chen curled his lips, his back hit the rocks at the bottom of the river, and his body was bumped up and down by the water.
pain.
Can't breathe.
I'll agree to give it a try because... I like you very much.
None of us are good material. Only after we improve ourselves, we are qualified to talk about love.
Whenever you need me, I'll be there.
Na Chen suddenly opened his eyes.
His chest ached and the strong urge to breathe made him struggle.
He could feel the large and small rocks on the riverbed with his hands, and he held on to them hard to push himself upwards.
The pain made him unable to move, and the suffocation and pain made his body heavier and heavier.
He gritted his teeth and tried hard.
He cannot die. He did not come here to die, and he did not jump down to die.
The sound of water flowing in his ears suddenly became chaotic, his collar was grabbed, and he kicked his legs hard following the upward force.
Fresh air poured into my nose and mouth, and a cold wind swept across my face.
Na Chen took two deep breaths and looked at the sky.
"Nachen." Ge Jian grabbed his collar and dragged him to the shore.
"Stars." Na Chen's eyes were a little scattered, and he kept looking at the sky.
"What? What did you say?" Ge Jian looked up and took off his coat and wrapped it around him. "Stars? There are no stars. It's cloudy tonight. Yawen bar w·w=w."
Na Chen stopped talking and his body began to tremble.
"Can you move?" Ge Jian pulled his arm, trying to help him up.
Na Chen frowned and groaned in pain, so Ge Jian had to let go: "Where's your phone... Your phone is useless. Do you remember the number? Speak."
"Li Fan," Na Chen said a few numbers in a low voice, then stopped halfway, "No, this is... An He's."
"If it's Anhe's, then it's Anhe's. Let's finish." Ge Jian was a little anxious. He touched Na Chen's hand, which was frighteningly cold. "Forget it, I'll call an ambulance first. My bones are also broken, and they just happen to be one piece."
Li Fan received a call in the middle of the night and came wearing pajamas and a military coat.
Ge Jian stood at the entrance of the hospital: "We drank and got into an argument with someone, got beaten and thrown into the river, understand?"
“…I understand.” Li Fan frowned and nodded.
"I have to go now," Ge Jian walked out of the hospital, "When Nachen wakes up, tell him that I have paid back what I owe him, and from now on just pretend you have never seen me."
It was the first time that An He was late, and he was quite late.
When he was woken up by the ringing of his cell phone, the time displayed on the phone almost made him fall off the bed.
The third class has already started!
"Hello?" He threw back the quilt and jumped out of bed, but when his feet touched the ground, it was like he stepped on a trampoline and he fell directly to his knees, his knees aching.
"Mr. An! My *! Where are you? In our political class!" * shouted over there.
"I...overslept, I'm still at home." When An He tried to stand up, he found that he was very dizzy. He couldn't even support himself with his hands. The pirate ship didn't have this effect. He had to bend over and use his forehead to support the floor. "I seem to be sick. You guys study first."
"Are you sick?" * was stunned. "Cold? I have a cold today too."
"Really? I didn't hear it." An He closed his eyes, "You guys study on your own. I'll go to school in the afternoon."
"Oh, then if there's someone patrolling the hall we'll tell them you went to the bathroom."
"Thank you, but don't think that I won't look for the parents just because you cover for me once." An He smiled.
Dizziness and weakness in limbs.
An He crawled around the bedroom on his hands and feet twice to find the thermometer. He took the temperature for fifteen minutes and it was 38.4 degrees.
I have a fever.
This is probably the result of walking back to the community from the hot pot city in the middle of the night north wind yesterday.
He sat on the floor for a long time before standing up, went into the living room, poured himself a cup of hot water, and sat on the sofa to drink it slowly.
Before I finished my glass of water, my cell phone rang again. It was my mom.
He stared at the screen for two seconds before answering the phone: "Mom."
"Tomorrow is Saturday, right? Come over and see if there's anything you want to take away," my mother said. "We'll go to the Civil Affairs Bureau next Monday."
"Want to divide things?" An He asked in a low voice.
"Well, he has nothing to do with the house, but he still has some stuff at home. I've always put it in your room, and I'm afraid he took the wrong thing," my mother said with a strong voice. "Why are you so half dead?"
"I have a fever." An He touched his forehead.
"Oh, then remember to come over and keep an eye on it tomorrow." My mother said and hung up the phone.
An He rarely gets sick. Sometimes he feels too tired and wants to die. He recovers after a good sleep. He didn't expect that he would have a fever after being exposed to the wind for two hours. >﹍雅﹏文吧ww·w`.-y=a`we·n8
He drank the hot water in the cup and looked at the calendar. Tomorrow was Saturday.
He didn't know how he felt now. He was so stubborn that he was almost paranoid. The home he had guarded for more than 20 years was gone, and he still had to watch these two people divide up his things.
"That's funny." He stood up and staggered into the kitchen, looking for something to eat.
When he was not feeling well, he could eat a lot and was always hungry. However, after walking around the kitchen twice, he couldn't find anything to eat. The instant noodles and biscuits were gone. Na Chen hadn't stocked him with food during this period, and the refrigerator could be used as a cabinet when the power was turned off.
Thinking of Na Chen, he sat on the chair beside the dining table and sighed softly.
The look in Nachen's eyes and pale face before he walked out of the cafe last night were still spinning in his mind like a kaleidoscope. He was already a little dizzy, and this one made him even more dizzy.
He leaned over the table, took out his phone and tapped the screen unconsciously, finally stopping at the page with the cutest character, Daqi.
What are you doing now
Go to class? Sleep
Or are you still... dealing with "your business"
His phone hovered over Nachen's name for a long time, and finally dropped it and clicked quickly.
When he heard the voice from the receiver saying the number you dialed is powered off, please call again later, An He put the phone on the table and breathed a sigh of relief for some reason, but then felt a little worried.
Is there something wrong with Chen, or is he just using his clumsy way to handle the relationship between them again
An He ordered takeout. The snack bar owner, whom he hadn't seen for a long time, also gave him a small rice dumpling when he delivered the food. He stuffed all the food into his stomach, wrapped himself in a quilt, and sat on the sofa, staring at the TV for the whole afternoon.
When he arrived at school in the afternoon, his fever had not subsided. When Principal Jiang saw him, he was stunned: "Are you sick? You look so bad."
"I have a little fever, but it's no big deal." An He rubbed his face.
"Take care of yourself. If you can't feel well, just take two days off. Young people shouldn't always think that they are as strong as bulls." Principal Jiang smiled.
Principal Jiang smiled very naturally. An He said nothing else and went straight upstairs to the office.
There is no movement on the photo issue for the time being. Judging from *'s behavior, I guess Principal Jiang hasn't contacted him.
An He sat in front of the computer at his desk, and said, "Let's do it one by one. Is there anything that cannot be handled? Is there any obstacle that cannot be overcome?"
No matter how unhappy you are, you have been walking step by step for more than 20 years.
When An He returned home on Saturday morning, there was no sound of mahjong in the house, which was rare. My mother was standing in the living room and making a phone call with an impatient look on her face: "Didn't you say you were feeling better? Why do you want someone to stay with you in bed again? An He is not an unemployed vagrant. He doesn't work anymore... What do you mean An He is the only man? Your husband is not a man, and my brother is not a man... Whoever wants An He to stay with you in bed can just call him and ask him to go. Why are you calling me? I don't have time to talk to you about this!"
"What's wrong?" An He asked after seeing his mother hang up the phone.
"Last week you said you were feeling better, and your grandpa said if you were more stable he would rather go back and wait for death than stay in the hospital. Now you're not leaving and want someone to stay by your bedside," Mom said with a sigh, "You look so sick, go and stay by your bedside. Let your grandpa see that you're dying and yet you're staying by his bedside. That's good."
"Let me handle it, don't worry about it. Where's my dad?" An He sighed.
"Who is your father?" Mom lit a cigarette and glanced at him.
"An Zhifei hasn't come yet?" An He had to change his address.
"This guy is like this, not like a man!" Mom puffed out a puff of smoke.
"Mom, can we talk?" An He sat down and lit a cigarette.
"What are you talking about? Stop telling me not to get a divorce. It's useless." Mom leaned on the sofa and looked at him.
"Are you really..." An He lowered his head and slowly exhaled a puff of smoke towards the ground, "You never wanted a child? I was just an accident."
"Really," the mother did not avoid his question and answered directly, "I know, I didn't take care of you all the time. You grew up like a dog or a cat. I don't even remember when you started working. You hate me for this, but I have nothing to say."
"I don't hate you," An He smiled, "No matter what you say, you raised me, I bought..."
"Bullshit," my mother sneered and took a deep puff of her cigarette. "Anhe, that's why I always say that you don't need to worry about me when I'm old or when I die. The nursing home will take care of it."
An He didn't say anything, just lowered his head and smoked.
My mother was silent for a while and then said, "You should think carefully before you get married and have children. Don't make it a mess like us."
"If I don't get married, I don't want children." An He put out the cigarette.
My mother looked at him and after a long moment she said, "Whatever you want."
Dad came over around noon, and as soon as he entered the room he said he didn't want anything. Mom said she felt annoyed looking at his things, and the two of them started arguing again after just a few words.
An He stood in the living room and listened to them arguing for twenty minutes. He stood up and patted the table: "I want to say something."
They both looked at him unhappily. He took his coat and put it on, then walked out the door while saying, "You two don't need to notify me again when you've completed the formalities."
An He walked downstairs, and the quarrel between his parents gradually died down and disappeared in his ears.
He stood downstairs and looked at the scenes around him. This was where he grew up. It felt familiar yet strange. Over the years, many things had changed.
The trees that seemed so big back then, don’t seem that tall now. The sesame seed buns that I was so greedy for that I thought I would die without regrets if I ate one of them, don’t smell appealing anymore.
He got in the car and called Lin Ruoxue: "Are you free?"
"You've grown mushrooms. Why, do you want to go out and play?" Lin Ruoxue asked with a smile.
"No, introduce me to a reliable doctor. I want to talk to someone." An He leaned forward to the rearview mirror and looked at his dark circles.
“… An He, this is not easy,” Lin Ruoxue said with a sigh, “You have professional knowledge, what are others talking to you about? What people talk to you about and the methods they give you are all what you understand yourself.”
"Then you go ahead," An He smiled, "I'm serious, I don't need you to counsel me, I just need someone to give me affirmation."
"Okay, let me tell you first, I'll charge you the normal fee. Your job is tiring." Lin Ruoxue clicked her tongue.
"no problem."
"Deal, come over when you're free, I'm free next Tuesday and Friday afternoon."
Na Chen has been half asleep and half awake in bed for four or five days. Li Fan and several members of the band take turns to accompany him when they are free.
According to the doctor, Na Chen's injuries were not light, with various breaks, fluid accumulation, strains and sprains, and a fever from soaking in cold water. He would have to stay in the hospital for about two months, but these were not enough to make him look like he was about to die like he is now.
"His brain is damaged." Yan Yi was sure.
"Yes, you are an example. You can get ruined even by taking a bath." Li Fan said.
"Not funny at all," Yan Yi sighed, "Did something happen with that An He? They were so hot and heavy a while ago, but now it's like this and no one is around."
"I guess no one knew about it at all." Li Fan saw Na Chen move and patted Yan Yi, "Go buy some food, good quality food. This kid is too picky. He didn't eat a single bite of the lunch we bought at the hospital. By the way, remember to ask if there is anything he can't eat."
After Yan Yi went out to buy food, Li Fan entered the ward, sat beside the bed and looked at the tube in Na Chen's hand.
"Cell phone." Na Chen said suddenly.
The voice was very low, but Li Fan still heard it clearly. This was the first time Na Chen spoke in a few days.
"Cellphone? You want a cellphone?" Li Fan took out his cellphone and put it in his hand. "Do you want this?"
"Well, change my number."
Li Fan found Na Chen's card and replaced it for him. Na Chen held the phone in front of him, paused for a moment and then started dialing.
"Who are you calling?" Li Fan leaned over the bed and looked at his phone.
Na Chen pressed a few numbers and then stopped. Li Fan sat up straight and said, "Okay, I won't look at it."
"No." Na Chen still spoke in a low voice. He did not continue dialing and suddenly let out a cry into the phone.
"What's wrong?" Li Fan looked at him.
"Ah—" Na Chen closed his eyes, the sound of "ah" was not loud, a little hoarse, "one, two, three, four, hello, hello, sound check, sound check, abcdefg... cup size, Li Fan, Li Fan, your wife has gained a lot of weight."
"Shit," Li Fan was stunned for a moment, jumped up from the stool, and touched his forehead, "Are you okay? Don't scare me."
"It's okay," Na Chen's face remained expressionless, "It's just like talking without sound, one, two, three, four, hello, hello... Are you listening? Is there no sound?"
"Fuck, I scared you to death. Even if it got like this, I couldn't stop you from going crazy." Li Fan breathed a sigh of relief and sat back on the stool, not knowing whether to laugh or cry. "Just lower your voice a little, as if you haven't woken up yet."
An He sat on the sofa with several thick psychological scales in front of him. He never did scales easily, because some things would affect the effect when you really need to evaluate them if you test them blindly.
He has recovered well in the past two days. After the fever subsided, he ate pigeon porridge for two days and felt okay. He planned to do a few assessments for himself.
Just as I picked up the pen, the phone beside me rang.
He took the phone and took a look, and the number displayed was Daqi.
"Hello?" He quickly picked up the phone. "Daqi?"
"Well, what are you doing?" Na Chen's voice came from the other side.
"Watch TV," An He was so excited when he heard Na Chen's voice that he couldn't control himself. "What's wrong with you these days?"
"About the photo... is there anyone else giving you trouble?" Na Chen asked.
"No, there has been no movement for a week."
"Anhe," Na Chen was silent for a moment, "Even if two people are just licking each other's wounds, it doesn't count as being in love. Is that what you meant the other day?"
"Yeah." An He responded.
"Can you fix yourself?" Na Chen asked softly.
"meeting."
"So... were you still there when I fixed myself?"
The author has something to say: I saw someone yesterday saying that it was going to end!! How could this be! Don’t you guys want it to be too sweet! Didn’t we say it had to be so sweet!!
See you Saturday!