Holding You Into My Arms

Chapter 65

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After hanging up the phone, Lin Jiayin turned and walked towards Tao Mo.

Tao Mo is looking down at something, it should be a report.

"You were on the phone just now, and the doctor gave it to me directly." Seeing her coming, Tao Mo quickly handed over the thin report card in her hand.

Lin Jiayin hummed lightly, took the report and looked down.

The analysis was dense, and she directly scanned to the bottom summary.

Severe anxiety, mild depression.

Lin Jiayin gripped the corner of the paper tightly.

Depression

She has depression

It's just insomnia, how could it be depression.

"Don't think about it, I just searched it on Baidu, and now many people are mildly depressed, just adjust it," Tao Mo pulled her forward, "Let's go to the doctor quickly, we have to get off work later gone."

Lin Jiayin held the report and nodded blankly.

The doctor who had treated Lin Jiayin before was talking to other patients, and the nurse told her to wait for someone to come out before going in.

Lin Jiayin stood at the door, and Tao Mo stood beside her.

"Did Shen Zhan call you just now?" Tao Mo asked suddenly.

"Yes." Lin Jiayin responded.

Tao Mo looked at her, and continued the topic that was interrupted by the ringtone before, "Do you really want to keep Shen Zhan from knowing?"

"I don't want to." Lin Jiayin shook her head.

"Afraid that he is worried?" Tao Mo swallowed with choked saliva, "But if you don't tell him, it will make people more worried."

As if she didn't have the strength to speak, Lin Jiayin's voice was very low, "Not all of them, telling him may..."

"What will happen?"

"I can't tell." Lin Jiayin let out a breath, leaned back with difficulty breathing, and leaned back against the wall.

Looking extremely tired.

"Don't tell him," Lin Jiayin opened her throat, and her voice was as loud as possible, "It will get better after a while."

Tao Mo let out a long sigh.

The door opened at this moment, Lin Jiayin stood up from the wall, walked in holding the report.

The doctor took the report, looked at it carefully, then moved his gaze to the computer screen, grabbed the mouse and clicked a few times, and then typed on the keyboard.

"I prescribed two medicines for you. One is hypnotic and calming, and the other is for regulating anxiety. There will be instructions on the medication precautions list, and someone will tell you when you take the medicine." The printer swiped After two rings, the doctor pulled out the medicine list for her, "I suggest you see a psychiatrist. The counseling room is in the building next door. Minors are free. Adults are 280 yuan a time. You need to make an appointment three days in advance. I I have already made an appointment for you for the first time, and you can cancel it yourself if you don’t think it is necessary.”

Lin Jiayin nodded, the medicine list in her hand was still warm, and she glanced at it with her head down.

Lorazepam and magnesium valproate extended-release tablets.

"Psychotropic drugs can only be prescribed for one month at a time. For your current situation, you need to take the medicine and do psychological treatment at the same time," the doctor looked at her. "As long as you feel that you are not good, you must come to the hospital and don't delay."

Lin Jiayin tapped her chin, and after a moment of silence she asked, "Are there any side effects from eating this?"

"The medicine is three-point poisonous. The side effects of these two medicines generally manifest as dizziness, anorexia, nausea and vomiting, etc. The feeling will be obvious at the beginning of taking the medicine, and the symptoms will be relieved or even disappear after getting used to it." The doctor pushed his glasses and continued Said: "However, your dose of medication is not large, compared to the side effects of insomnia and anxiety, it can be ignored."

"Oh..." Lin Jiayin nodded again.

"So you must take the medicine well and don't have a resistance mentality." The doctor said.

Lin Jiayin smiled at her, thanked her and turned to leave.

"The one outside is your roommate, right?" The doctor stopped him and looked outside the concealed door.

"It's my roommate." Lin Jiayin turned around.

The doctor said: "Let your roommate come in, you wait outside for a while."

Lin Jiayin was taken aback, but she still asked Tao Mo to come in according to the doctor's instructions, and then waited outside by herself.

After Tao Mo went in, she closed the door behind her.

She stood at the door with her back against the wall, staring at the same white wall opposite.

The brain was groggy, and the long-term lack of sleep made her thinking extremely slow.

After waiting for a few minutes, Tao Mo came out.

"The doctor didn't say anything else, just let me tell you to take your medicine well, and if your condition is not right, I will send you to the hospital." Tao Mo spoke first.

Lin Jiayin let out a long cry.

Tao Mo pursed her lips.

Actually there are others.

Doctors say that anxiety is a disease of the heart, but over time, the heart disease will produce physical lesions, and the brain is prone to problems.

Although it is mild depression now, if the anxiety continues for a long time, the endocrine will be out of control, the emotions will be out of control, and the mild depression will become moderate or even severe... It is best to find a way to get her out of the situation that makes her anxious.

After paying the fee and taking the medicine, Lin Jiayin and Tao Mo walked out of the hospital together.

When going out from the hall, Lin Jiayin looked back a few times.

"What are you looking at?" Tao Mo asked.

"It's nothing..." Lin Jiayin turned around.

She was looking for the girl just now, the girl with empty eyes.

She's not here anymore, someone else is sitting in her place.

At this moment, Lin Jiayin suddenly became frightened.

Back at school, Lin Jiayin invited Tao Mo to have dinner at the snack street opposite.

After eating, Lin Jiayin went straight back to Senhe.

Shen Zhan is not at home, she seems to have nothing to do.

Obviously, she used to sit on the sofa and watch TV, but tonight it was boring. The sound of the TV was quite loud, so she just stared at it blankly.

The hero and heroine are talking, but she doesn't seem to be able to hear, and she doesn't understand what they are talking about.

The whole person was in a trance, bewildered.

After staying in a daze like this until after 10 o'clock, Shen Zhan made a video call to her.

Shen Zhan in the front camera is still so handsome.

Lin Jiayin raised her phone up, revealing her entire face.

"Miss me?" Shen Zhan asked with a smile.

Lin Jiayin responded softly, "I think so."

"Why don't you have the strength?" Shen Zhan asked her.

"Because..." Lin Jiayin blinked and blinked, "I think you have no strength."

After speaking, the voice became softer and softer, the eyes suddenly turned red, and the tip of the nose began to smell sour.

"I'll be back tomorrow night." Shen Zhan said.

Lin Jiayin raised the corners of her lips and smiled, "I want to hug you, Zhan Zhan."

The coquettish, hoarse, slightly nasal voice made Shen Zhan's heart tighten, and he felt inexplicably sad.

"I'll change the ticket later," he said, "Come back tomorrow afternoon."

"Okay." Lin Jiayin squinted and continued to smile, "I'll wait for you to come back."

"How was your afternoon?" Shen Zhan asked.

"good."

Shen Zhan raised his eyebrows, "Have you bought the green hat?"

"I bought it, and I'll wear it when you come back." Lin Jiayin pouted and said.

"You really dare to buy it." Shen Zhan raised his eyebrows.

Lin Jiayin stared: "There's nothing you dare not do."

Shen Zhan chuckled, "I still have something to do here, it's getting late, go to sleep."

"Remember to miss me." Lin Jiayin unconsciously grasped the hem of her clothes.

"I think about it every minute." Shen Zhan said.

Lin Jiayin waved her hand, "Then I'll hang up."

"Hang up, go to sleep." Shen Zhan said softly.

After hanging up the video, Lin Jiayin cast her eyes on the bag of medicine placed in the center of the coffee table, stared blankly for a while, then got up to get a glass of water, and took the medicine according to the instructions above.

You can only take half a tablet on the first day, and gradually increase the amount later.

Lin Jiayin raised her head and threw the medicine down her throat, and gulped down a mouthful of water.

Not knowing if it would work, Lin Jiayin nestled back on the sofa.

For the first ten minutes, she didn't feel anything, but after a while, Lin Jiayin felt dizzy.

Either the drowsy kind of drowsiness, or simply dizziness.

She frowned and stood up.

When I got up, I almost fell down.

The whole person seems to be drunk, the world is spinning, the floor seems to be moving all the time, and walking is shaky.

She leaned on the wall and staggered towards the bedroom, the plastic medicine bag hanging on her wrist banged and rattled.

Lin Jiayin thought it was funny that she looked like this.

He obviously didn't drink, he looked like a drunk.

She closed her eyes for a while, and then pushed open the door of the bedroom after she collected herself.

He knelt down with his hands on the edge of the bed, lay down on the ground, and reached out to stuff the plastic bag under the bed.

The moment he got up, his eyes went dark, and his forehead hit the corner of the bed.

"Hiss—" Lin Jiayin bit her lip in pain and couldn't make any other sounds. After a while, she raised her hand to touch it.

It's sticky and broke the skin.

This bump woke me up a lot, Lin Jiayin stood up and walked into the bathroom to look in the mirror.

Above the left eyebrow, close to the temple, a small opening was opened, and blood kept oozing out.

She turned around and walked back to the bedroom to find the medicine box. She simply used alcohol to sterilize the poison, pulled a small piece of gauze to cover it, and then glued it with medical tape.

Looking at herself in the mirror, Lin Jiayin let out a long cry.

It's really stupid, and it's really bad luck.

Shen Zhan contacted the person in charge of Minghui, pushed forward the final contract signing, and went to the airport at 2 pm.

However, the flight was delayed, and I waited dryly for more than two hours at the airport, and it was already eight o'clock in the evening when I returned to Senhe.

Before boarding the plane, he sent Lin Jiayin a WeChat message, got off the plane and turned on his phone.

Lin Jiayin said that the teacher had something to do with her and would come back later, so Shen Zhan went home and waited for you.

He sat on the sofa for a while, and suddenly thought of the green hat Lin Jiayin mentioned, swept it on the tea table, curled his lips, stood up lazily, and walked to the bedroom.

He really didn't believe that Lin Jiayin would come back with a green hat.

As soon as he entered the bedroom, the phone rang.

Shen Zhan thought it was Lin Jiayin, but it turned out to be an unknown call. He swiped his finger and refused to answer.

He receives many unknown calls and anonymous text messages every day.

Either educating him with long speeches, or calling him dead mother outright.

These people really have enough free time. If he hadn't considered work matters, he would have changed his number a long time ago.

Shen Zhan sat on the edge of the bed, lowered his head and pressed his phone.

One second before he tapped on the black option, a text message popped up from the status bar at the top of the screen.

- I'm Tao Mo, I have something to tell you

A few seconds later, the phone number that was about to be blocked called again.

Shen Zhan swiped, got up and walked to the French window to answer.

"Is it Shen Zhan?" There was a female voice on the other end of the phone.

Shen Zhan had met Tao Mo a few times and heard her talk.

"Hmm." He responded.

There was a sudden silence over there, as if hesitating for something.

"What's the matter?" Shen Zhan spoke first.

Tao Mo sighed, and remained silent for a while before saying, "Do you think there is something wrong with Sister Lin?"

Lin Jiayin didn't let her tell Shen Zhan about seeing a doctor, Tao Mo could only remind him insinuatingly.

"Question?" Shen Zhan frowned.

Tao Mo nodded: "Did she tell you that the courtyard chose her to go abroad for exchange?"

"I never said that." Shen Zhan gripped the phone tightly.

"Sister Lin was very happy when the quota came down, but now she suddenly regrets not going," Tao Mo paused, and continued, "Because you didn't go."

"Because of me?" Shen Zhan closed the window and turned around.

Tao Mo repeated to Lin Jiayin what she said to him.

"I think she's watching you breathe."

Shen Zhan was taken aback for a moment, then stopped in his footsteps.

"I don't know if you can understand what I mean, but she has tied her whole body to you and regards you as very important, very very important, more important than her own life, as long as you are a little bit bad, she You will be anxious, and you will be out of breath." Tao Mo finished in one breath.

"Anxiety... I can't breathe..." Shen Zhan repeated in a low voice.

Recalling Lin Jiayin's state since the National Day, those thoughts that had been entangled in her mind suddenly unraveled.

There was a sudden silence on both sides.

After a while, Shen Zhan lowered his voice and said, "This matter will be over soon."

Jiang Xiaowen has already found a lawyer and is waiting for the court to accept the hearing.

"Even if this incident is over, what about the future? If something happens to you in the future, she will still be like this." Tao Mo raised her voice sharply, "You have to let her understand that she is an independent individual , can't keep looking at you, holding you, she will be tired and sick."

Shen Zhan was silent.

"You understand, right? You must understand in your heart." Tao Mo took a deep breath after asking and answering herself, and her voice softened, "I have said so much, you may think I am meddling, but I really You can’t just look at it and say nothing.”

"Did you know? She doesn't smile much now." Tao Mo hung up the phone right after finishing speaking.

Shen Zhan stood in front of the bed for a long time before he stepped out, planning to go to school to find Lin Jiayin and ask her personally.

The strength in my whole body seemed to be sucked away, and I felt powerless. I just took two steps, and the phone slipped from my hand with a snap, and slid under the bed.

Shen Zhan squatted down and reached under the bed to pick it up.

When the fingertips touched something similar to a plastic bag, something rustled, Shen Zhan was startled, and hooked his fingers out.

Lin Jiayin came out of the office and looked up at the sky.

It was completely dark, only a few stars were twinkling, and the moonlight was not bright enough.

She let out a long sigh.

Lately I always like to sigh.

Teacher Wang tried hard to persuade her all night, and her lips were worn out. She either remained silent or shook her head.

Wang Yizhen stared at her angrily for a while, and finally said only five words.

OK, let's go.

Deeply disappointed.

Lin Jiayin sighed again.

He took out his mobile phone from his pocket, and when he saw Shen Zhan's WeChat message to her, he finally relaxed his frowning brows, and smiled with raised lips.

Shen Zhan was sitting on the sofa, holding a psychological test report in his hand, and looked at it for a long time under the bright light.

There was no expression on his face, he just pinched the report like that, as if he was reading, but also seemed to be lost in thought.

He always felt that Lin Jiayin was happy with him.

But now, he began to have doubts.

Does it make sense for her to be with herself

Her light gave him, but what about herself

She is not happy at all right now.

Even sick.

Because of him, all because of him.

Shen Zhan took a deep breath, feeling powerless, irritable, flustered, and at a loss what to do.

He raised his head, reached for the cigarette case on the coffee table, and was taken aback when he opened it and saw that it was full of candies.

The candy paper shone colorfully under the light.

It made him even more irritable.

The suppressed emotions were no longer under the control of reason, he raised his hand and threw the cigarette case on the ground hard.

Hard candies jingled and scattered all over the place.

Lin Jiayin pushed the door open at this moment.

"Shen Zhan?" She stood at the entrance, looking at everything she found, suddenly feeling a little uneasy.

Shen Zhan put his head in his hands and lowered his head.

A candy rolled to her feet, Lin Jiayin stepped on it and walked over.

"Why..." When she saw the medicine and the report on the table, her uneasiness grew wildly and rushed wildly in her body, "I..."

Shen Zhan couldn't describe his feelings.

When he threw away the cigarette case that Lin Jiayin exchanged for candy for him, his heart ached as if someone had grabbed him hard.

Everything is his business.

Why did Lin Jiayin have to bear this

Seeing that Shen Zhan kept her head down, Lin Jiayin didn't know what to say. She pursed her lips, went to the coffee table and squatted down, picked up all the candies rolled under her feet, and put them back into the cigarette case.

It seemed that out of the corner of her eye she caught the movement of her squatting down, Shen Zhan raised his head, "Don't pick it up."

His voice was very dry, as if he had swallowed sand in his mouth.

Lin Jiayin paused for a moment, but quickly lowered her head and continued picking candies.

"I said don't pick it up." Shen Zhan stood up wearily.

Lin Jiayin raised her head, but without paying attention, her forehead touched the edge of the coffee table again.

Coincidentally, it was the wound that was knocked on the corner of the bed yesterday.

She hissed reflexively.

Shen Zhan saw a little blood oozing from the gauze on her forehead.

His heart was hit so hard that his tears almost came out.

She is watching you breathe.

She has her whole body tied to you.

She regards you as important, more important than her own life.

As long as you have a little bad, she will be anxious and out of breath.

She can't keep looking at you and grabbing you like this.

She will be tired and sick.

Shen Zhan closed his eyes, opened his eyes and saw that she was still picking up candy with her head down.

As if he couldn't understand what he was saying.

"Lin Jiayin." He walked over and lifted her up.

Lin Jiayin smiled, looked at him as if nothing had happened, and shook the cigarette case in his hand, "You accidentally dropped it, right? It's okay, I'll pick it up for you."

"Lin Jiayin," Shen Zhan looked at her and called her name again.

"Call me Little Sunshine." As she spoke, her eyes turned red, and tears welled up in their sockets.

Shen Zhan still looked at her, "Little Sun."

"Yes." Lin Jiayin responded.

"You..." he said.

Lin Jiayin interrupted him, pointing to the medicine on the table, "I wanted to tell you when you came back."

"You," Shen Zhan choked up and was a little out of breath, "are you tired?"

"I'm not tired, didn't I tell you, I like dancing very much." Even though tears had been drawn down her cheek twice, Lin Jiayin still said with a smile.

"I mean... are you tired?" Shen Zhan looked directly into her eyes.

Lin Jiayin sobbed violently.

Shen Zhan also pursed the corners of his lips.

After a moment of silence, Shen Zhan opened his mouth.

"You see you are sick."

"It's nothing, it's really nothing, it will be over soon," Lin Jiayin repeated, "it will be over soon."

"We..." Shen Zhan closed his eyes and tried his best to say the following words, "Let's break up."

Lin Jiayin was taken aback for a moment, then suddenly shouted, "I don't want it."

"Look at how thin you look." Shen Zhan opened his eyes, and raised his hand to touch her sunken cheeks that were so thin.

"The teacher said, I have to lose weight. I have to be very thin to dance. Are you breaking up with me because I am sick? I have already seen the doctor. The doctor said that it is not serious. As long as you take the medicine on time, you will be fine." It will be fine, it will be fine soon," Lin Jiayin said incoherently, her voice became more and more hoarse, "And I am not tired, not at all, even if I am tired, I am willing, don't blame yourself, I don't blame... "

"But I don't want to." Shen Zhan interrupted her.

His eyes were cold, not as gentle as before when he looked at her eyes.

"Why?" Lin Jiayin opened his hand, took a step back, and looked at him with tears streaming down his face.

"I don't want to, let's break up." Shen Zhan said in a cold tone.

"I don't want it." Lin Jiayin shook her head frantically.

Shen Zhan took a deep breath, pointed out the door, "Get out, get out of here, don't like me anymore."

Lin Jiayin still shook her head, ran over with a rattling, and jumped on him, hugged him tightly with both hands, and kept muttering that if you don't want to get out, I just like you.

"I'm not telling you to roll into my arms." Shen Zhan was angry and funny.

Angry at her for not caring about how tired she was, and laughing at her for being so hard-hearted and letting her roll, she could still slip into her arms.

"I won't get out, I just won't get out." Lin Jiayin cried and raised her head, resting her chin on his chest, said aggrievedly, "Who will love you if I get out?"

The author has something to say: In the next chapter, I will be with you, there will be no thunder and rain, and the rest will be sunny, including what happened to Zhao Ye. I am afraid that the author who sent you the blade will cry loudly, and it will end in about 30w.