Wang Jin didn't want to have any entanglements with Jin Yue anymore, and he couldn't treat Jin Yue as an old classmate. It wasn't because he was still worried about what happened back then. It's so strange.
He was going to the parking lot to pick up the car, but Jin Yue still followed him.
He stopped, turned around and said, "Where are you going? You may not be on the way."
Jin Yue smiled and said, "You must also be going back to the urban area within the Fifth Ring Road, why don't you go along the way?"
Wang Jin ignored him and walked quickly.
In the parking lot, he found his car and got into the driver's seat.
Jin Yue pulled the co-pilot's door, but it was locked, and he couldn't open it.
He didn't even change his face, knocked on the car window, and said as usual: "Wang Jin, open the door."
Wang Jin: "..."
Is he the kind of person who would make things so ugly, or let Jin Yue get into the car.
There was no joy on Jin Yue's face, and he put on his seat belt calmly.
Wang Jin drove out of the airport slowly.
Jin Yue said: "The teacher said that the patient with spinal deformity you picked up, how is it now?"
Wang Jindao: "The operation went well, and the postoperative recovery is not bad."
Jin Yue said: "That's pretty good, I'll be free later, can you show me the information?"
Wang Jin said, "It's not convenient."
Jin Yue nodded and said, "Forget it."
The car got on the highway, turned a corner and headed west, the setting sun was somewhat dazzling, Wang Jin took out his sunglasses and put them on. Jin Yue turned his head to look, Wang Jin's profile was handsome and indifferent.
He looked back and lowered the sun visor in front of the glass.
A small animated sticker affixed to the visor looks like a gray, celestial wolf.
Jin Yue stared intently for a moment, of course it couldn't be that Wang Jin posted it here.
He asked, "Is this Big Big Wolf?"
Wang Jin's eyes were blocked behind the sunglasses, and he replied, "It's Xiao Hui Hui."
Jin Yue didn't know who Xiao Huihui was, and didn't want to ask. He turned up the sun visor again, and the west sun was reflected in his eyes, like two burning flames.
After passing the Wuyuan Bridge, Wang Jin asked, "Where are you going?"
Jin Yue asked back, "Where are you going?"
Wang Jin stopped talking, and was going to put him down at any place when he got off the highway.
Jin Yue looked at him and said, "Send me to my alma mater."
Wang Jin: "... where?"
Jin Yue repeated: "Go to our alma mater, No. 38 Xueyuan Road, Haidian District."
But Wang Jin drove off the highway at the next crossing, and then stopped on the side of the road.
He turned off the ignition, took off his sunglasses, threw them on the dashboard, and said, "What are you doing?"
Jin Yue looked at his slender fingers on the steering wheel and said, "Your hands are so pretty."
Wang Jin: "..."
Jin Yue dazed, looked away and said: "Do you remember? One day in spring, I asked you to meet at school."
Wang Jin remembered that it was the weekend, because Bai Tu was at home, and Yan Rong could not spend the night with him. He spent an afternoon with Yan Rong, and then sent Yan Rong home. That was the first time he heard Yan Rong mention "German classmate ben ".
Jin Yue said: "I waited all night that day, but I didn't wait for you."
He asked, "Is that the kid who forbids you to go?"
Wang Jin said: "I don't want to go."
Jin Yue obviously didn't believe it, but he didn't stick to this question, saying: "It doesn't matter, it's over anyway."
He asked carefully but firmly: "Wang Jin, have you thought about me these years?"
Without waiting for Wang Jin to answer, he added, "I miss you every day."
He said: "My mother urged me to get married and arranged blind dates for me. I never went to see her. She was sick last winter and urged her even more urgently. I told her that I had someone I loved, and she Ask me where that person is, I said, I accidentally lost it, and she said why didn't you find it back? I thought, yes, if he doesn't come to me, then I will go to him. It was very cold that day. When I rang your doorbell, it was the kid who opened the door for me. He said that you are his uncle, and kids are cute too. Who are you lying to? I am blind, and I can see that he slept in your bed Yes, during the ten minutes waiting for you to come back, I thought of hundreds of ways to kill him without being discovered."
Wang Jin finally turned his head to look at him, his eyes were full of astonishment.
Jin Yue laughed and said: "But he doesn't know anything, and he is still eating fried beef with relish. I thought again, what do you like about a child, he is nothing more than young and beautiful. Don’t be jealous of him. Then you came back, and I knew I guessed right. Your eyes have been on me all the time, and you don’t love that kid at all. You scolded me that day, and you asked me why I came back, saying I'm shameless, and let me go. Then I will go, but I go very comfortably. I know you haven't forgotten me. You still remember the time when I made a girlfriend behind your back. I drew on your heart. One knife, it hasn't grown well at all, as long as it is still there, you are still mine."
Wang Jin was silent. At that time, there was no love between him and Yan Rong, and he himself was indeed still trapped in the emotional wound a few years ago, and he had not fully come out.
Jin Yue went on to say: "After going back, I walked with my mother for the last part of her journey. At the end of March, she was gone. After finishing her funeral, I resigned, sold my house and car, and came to Beijing to find you. .Just over two months, you have changed from 'his uncle' to 'his boyfriend', you are really fascinated by a little boy, and you rejected me because of him. I regretted it at that time, I really You should have killed him the first time we met."
Wang Jin frowned and said, "Stop talking nonsense."
Jin Yue was overjoyed. He felt that there was a hint of intimacy in Wang Jin's words, and said with a smile, "I'm just talking, but I won't really kill people."
Wang Jin's heart slowly eased when he mentioned his throat. He was really startled for a moment by the cruelty in Jin Yue's words.
Jin Yue changed his tone of teasing and said: "Actually, I also know what you like about him. Apart from being young and beautiful, he also has a miserable life experience, and he doesn't fit in well in school. It's similar to my stupid appearance back then. You like to take care of this kind of broken wings." weak chicken."
Wang Jin looked sideways at him with a somewhat inexplicable expression.
Jin Yue sneered, and said: "I'm not doing well now, the hospital I just entered is not very good, my colleagues don't think much of me as an outsider, and I can't afford a house in Beijing, I may have to rent a house for the rest of my life... It's already so miserable, you still ignore me."
When it came to the end, his tone and expression were somewhat aggrieved.
Wang Jin looked at him for a moment and asked, "Jin Yue, did you really love me?"
Jin Yue's eyes lit up, and Wang Jin was finally willing to talk about "love" with him.
He eagerly confessed: "Of course I love you. I haven't been able to forgive myself all these years. Why did I have to die at that time, and I wanted to prove your love for me by hurting you. Obviously we can go on forever, and we will To this day, it's all my fault, I'm narrow-minded, I care about every detail, in fact, it doesn't matter why you love me, as long as you love me, that's enough."
Wang Jin looked at him more delicately, and said, "You were not like this before."
Jin Yue was a little flustered, and he justified: "At that time, my thoughts were too extreme."
Wang Jin shook his head and said: "That's not the case. If I want to be with you because I sympathize with you, it's right for you to leave me, and that's you."
Jin Yue blinked hard, he was a little confused.
Wang Jindao: "You told Yan Rong that if you want to eat sugar-fried chestnuts on a snowy day, I'll go and buy them for you. If you want to go home for the New Year, but you can't get away from school, I'll go to the train station and queue up all night to buy them for you." Tickets. I want to eat chestnuts, and I want to go home during the Chinese New Year. What’s so pitiful about it? Why don’t you understand until now? I haven’t sympathized with you from the beginning to the end. I’m just trying my best to treat you well.”
Jin Yue moved his lips, but couldn't speak.
Wang Jin lowered his eyes and said, "At first, I didn't even notice that you were still in the class. I was helping to record the grades in the department that day. You rushed in from the outside, and you could see that you were in a bad mood, but you were still very nervous. Politely ask where the instructor is, I don't know what happened, those nasty snobs say something sarcastic about you, and you fight them like an angry little cock. Teacher They came back and asked what was going on, they grouped together to slander you, the teacher still believed it, I still remember your eyes at that time, angry and wronged, but very bright, I was attracted by those eyes."
"Later we became friends and found that you are really interesting. You have no money to eat and buy clothes, and you can't even afford to pay for a taxi. They talk behind your back about your poverty, your single-parent family, and your inability to communicate, but you are still so proud. Professional courses The grades are always the best, and your excellence will not be knocked down by ridicule and sarcasm. I have never liked anyone. At that time, I only knew that I wanted to see you every day. I just like it. But I dare not say it. You are the number one student in the college entrance examination in your hometown. Your mother only has you as a son. She must hope that you will marry a wife and have children. You are different from me. I'm too young, my parents don't care about me at all, and my closest grandparents are gone, no one in this world expects me, but I can't just pull you together just because I like you Go the hard way."
"Unexpectedly, you were the one who confessed to me first. I was so happy that day that I came out of the closet when I got home. My dad beat me up and said he would cut off my tuition and living expenses. I didn't care. I think it is enough for me to have you. And I am also like you. I can live a life of poverty with you, work hard together to get scholarships, fight for places in insurance research, work together, and earn money to support each other. Nothing wrong."
After such a long speech, Wang Jin was always calm. He finally said: "Jin Yue, you have never tried to understand me, otherwise how could you not know that I will fall in love with you, never because of sympathy, What I fall in love with is the dazzling and proud you."
Jin Yue was stunned, he remembered all the kindness Wang Jin had treated him in those years, and also remembered the sentence Wang Jin asked him with red eyes when he found out his betrayal: "Why don't you want me anymore?"
He felt heart-piercing pain, and he finally realized that it wasn't Wang Jin who didn't treat him as an equal lover, but that he destroyed their love with his own hands.
Looking at Wang Jin's indifferent and tired expression, he vaguely understood that there was no turning back.
Their problem cannot be solved by driving away a child.
The harm he caused Wang Jin is an unsolvable problem.
He unbuckled his seat belt and said silently: "Thank you for letting me take this journey, I... I'm here."
He opened the door and got out of the car, stood on the side of the road, tried his best to smile, and said, "Wang Jin, goodbye."
Wang Jin still couldn't bear it, and said, "I'll take you to a place where you can take a taxi."
But Jin Yue said with a mocking expression: "In vain, you have a relationship with a child, don't you even know about the taxi app?"
Wang Jin closed his mouth, said no more, said goodbye to him, and drove away.
The sun had already sunk, leaving only a small half of a face on the far horizon.
Jin Yue squatted down on the side of the road, and hummed softly: "The promise is too beautiful because it is too young, but my dear, that is not love..."
He smiled and the tears fell again.
On the way home alone, Wang Jin remembered something, reached out and flipped down the sun visor in front of the co-pilot, and the "little Huihui" on it tilted his head to look cute at him.
He touched "Little Huihui" with his fingers, thinking of Yanrong so much that his heart ached a little.