When Mai Ding was arranging his summer clothes at home and preparing to take them there, he accidentally found his childhood diary. He looked at the yellowed cover. When did he give up the habit of writing a diary? He used to be like a girl I hope to record the bits and pieces in my life and turn them into good memories in the future.
He opened the diary, and it was his childish handwriting:
X, X, X, Sunny
A few days ago, when I was watching TV, Xiao Xia came to tell me that Mei was missing. I didn't take it seriously, I thought it was just a child who was greedy for fun, so I ran to a relative's house to play. Mei is one year younger than me and lives upstairs from me. We grew up together. I had a fight with her yesterday because of a trivial matter. We ignored each other and waited for the other to apologize. Today, Xiaoxia came to me with a pale face and told me that Mei was dead. She was strangled@in the water after being raped & violently, and the body was just found. My mind went blank, I didn't know how to respond, I couldn't believe it was real, that Mei who was smiling every day, that person who was looking forward to watching the Legend of the New White Lady at my house every summer vacation, that person who was dressed in front of me The person who keeps twirling in the newly bought floral skirt, the person who has been with me for 11 years.
When Xiaoxia left, I was still sitting here stupidly. Later, my mother told me that Mei’s person could not be found anywhere. One day, Mei’s mother had a dream, and she dreamed that Mei was calling her mother in the water, save me. Later, Mei was really found in the water. She was naked, her upper body was covered with a big bag, and there were stones in it to make the body sink in the water. The small body was lying there pale and shocking.
How can I say and write to express my sadness, but the tears can't help but overflow. Who said that you don't know anything when you are young, why do I feel so clearly when I am 12 years old.
X, X, X, Sunny
When I was about to eat, I heard my parents discussing as soon as I walked to the door. In fact, some fishing people nearby saw where Mei had gone, but they didn't dare to say it, because they didn't want to cause trouble. And Mei died in that small town, which was so big, but the murderer could not be found. I walked in and my parents stopped talking, they didn't want to talk about May in front of me.
I began to hate, hate those selfish people, hate those hypocritical fake good people, hate those whores. Just an 11-year-old kid, how could he bear to do it. Sadly no one came forward to say a word. At that moment, I made up my mind to be a prostitute when I grow up and find out who killed Mei. My tears dripped onto the diary, blurring out the words full of hatred. Mei, how can you leave me like this, I still want to say sorry to you, I'm sorry, I shouldn't quarrel with you, I'm sorry, Mei. But I can no longer get your forgiveness. Mei's small tomb stands there alone, while the murderer is at large.
I hate!
Those cruel people, those who help the cruel people, you are devils, you should be killed, you should be killed.
At the age of 12, I began to understand what it means to be human and indifferent. I retracted myself into the protective shell and started to talk less. The classmates in the class began to isolate me and call me a weirdo behind my back. I don't have many friends and I have low self-esteem, but I'll never forget you, May.
God, how can you bloom unscrupulously on such a sad day, the sun is too dazzling, I need to hide.
Mai Ding closed the diary in panic, he finally remembered why he gave up writing in the diary, because the memories were all sad and could no longer serve as a proof of happiness.
But Mai Ding forgot the once sworn promise to Mei, because he couldn't be a prostitute, and when he grew up, he realized that he was so insignificant, that people couldn't do what they wanted. After so many years, Mei's smile gradually faded in her mind. Mai Ding covered his face with his hands, but he couldn't restrain the tears from falling down the back of his hands. At least he would still be sad. Is it comforting or ironic
Sorry, May, I lied.
There is nothing I can do about your death.
After a long time, Mai Ding put the diary into the bag and took it with him. An Ziyan has already gone home, Mai Ding put away his things and turned on the TV, An Ziyan saw Mai Ding's red and swollen eyes.
"What's wrong?" Mai Ding raised his head: "An Ziyan, everyone thinks I'm a weirdo, what about you?" Regardless of others, he can't change other people, he can only change himself, let himself become a kind-hearted, courageous person who will never stand idly by, for both Mei and others.
An Ziyan knew that something was wrong with this look, but he was not a person who liked to ask questions, if Mai Ding wanted to speak, he would listen. If he didn't want to say it, An Ziyan wouldn't force it either. He just sat next to Mai Ding, the TV was very loud, but Mai Ding couldn't hear him at all, just waiting for An Ziyan's answer.
"Others can't see your goodness."
Mai Ding tightened his lips: "Why can't they see it."
An Ziyan stretched out his hand and dragged Mai Ding into his arms, put his chin against Mai Ding's head, and gently patted Mai Ding's back with his hand like comforting a baby: "You are good as long as I can see it. , isn't it?"
That's right, I'm too greedy, I don't have nothing, and An Ziyan, that man who easily breaks through his protective shell.
"What if one day you suddenly leave me?"
"Then you have to believe that I will come back."
An Ziyan's pleasant voice echoed in Mai Ding's ears, soft, beautiful, and moving, Mai Ding was intoxicated by it and couldn't extricate himself.
Every time your love comes out, I can't resist it.
Mai Ding called Aunt Yuan home and planned to cook by himself tonight. When An Ziyan was in the bedroom getting his clothes ready to take a shower, he saw the yellowed diary. He glanced outside the door and poked the diary with his hand. Ben, the diary fell to the ground and spread out. At that time, Mai Ding discovered it, and it can be said that he fell down and accidentally saw it.
He picked up the diary, and the diary only wrote thirty pages, but it was full of sadness. An Ziyan put down his clothes, sat on the bed, slowly read everything, and understood why Mai Ding had such a reaction just now.
Mai Ding shouted outside: "Have you taken a shower yet, the meal is almost ready."
"kindness."
An Ziyan put the diary back to its original place, and walked into the bathroom. At noon the next day, Mai Ding received a call from An Ziyan.
"Why are you calling me at this time?"
"Don't go to class in the afternoon, I'm outside the door, come out."
"But."
"immediately."
"Okay, I see." Mai Ding asked the teacher for leave and ran out. An Ziyan was impatient with the wait. When he saw Mai Ding coming, he honked the horn to urge Mai Ding. Mai Ding sat there with his eyes wide open. Get in the car: "What are you doing, is there anything urgent?" "Yes."
An Ziyan didn't say much, and Mai Ding didn't ask too much. Since it is an important matter, you should know it later. The car has been driving for a long time, so long that Mai Ding fell asleep. After a long time, he was woken up by the bumpy road. He rubbed his eyes and looked at the familiar place. The town he lived in when he was a child, everything is still the same as before Same. He turned his head to stare at An Ziyan in surprise, but soon, he smiled, yes, there is nothing that can hide from An Ziyan.
The car kept going.
"Didn't you stop here? Where else are you going? Did my mother tell you, you guy? What happened to you today, please be kind and bring me here."
An Ziyan didn't speak, just cared about driving, and the car drove to a forest not far from the town. The rough road made it impossible to move forward, so he could only walk. Mai Ding got out of the car and looked into the depths of the woods, he squeezed his hands tightly, his nails got stuck in his flesh, he knew where it was, but he kept avoiding the place, he broke his promise, he was not qualified to visit Mei again.
He understood that An Ziyan had read his diary.
An Ziyan walked towards the woods, turned his head to stare at Mai Ding: "Let's go."