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When the meal was ready, Cheng Yu helped him bring the dishes out.
Lin Anlan scooped up the porridge and put it in front of him.
"You eat, I'll go first."
Cheng Yu looked up at him in astonishment, "You... won't you eat together?"
"I won't eat it." Lin Anlan said warmly, "You have finished eating, so rest early."
Cheng Yu didn't want to eat for a moment.
He stood quietly, expressing his emotions silently.
"Let's go together." Cheng Yu said softly, "I haven't eaten with you for a long time."
In fact, it didn't take long, Lin Anlan thought, it was only a few days after they were separated, not ten days, so it wouldn't be a long time.
Cheng Yu turned around and went into the kitchen, took a bowl, scooped a bowl of porridge for him, and put it across from him, "Let's go after eating, it's time to eat."
Lin Anlan had no choice but to sit down and have a meal with him.
He made the rice, and it was naturally to his appetite. Lin Anlan drank the porridge with her head down, not knowing what to say.
Cheng Yu really knew what to say, he said, "I haven't had such a delicious meal for a long time."
Lin Anlan looked up at him, thinking that he was really sweet.
It's just home-cooked food, so he thinks it's delicious, "Then you eat more."
"Yeah." Cheng Yu smiled at him.
He smiled beautifully, probably because he was still ill, his face was pale, and he had a sense of innocent purity, like a child.
Lin Anlan looked at the clarity in his eyes, pondered for a long time, and whispered to him, "Cheng Yu, I have regained my memory."
Cheng Yu's smile disappeared instantly, replaced by shock and anxiety.
He stared at him in a daze, the whole person was stunned, and there was fear in his eyes.
"So, I'm still thinking," Lin Anlan told him, "I haven't figured it out yet."
Cheng Yu nodded unconsciously, and lowered his head hastily, covering up his uneasiness and not daring to look at him.
He didn't expect that Lin Anlan would recover his memory. Lin Anlan who recovered his memory and Lin Anlan who lost his memory were different to him.
He dared to admit his mistake like Lin Anlan who lost his memory, and hoped that he would forgive himself, because he knew that Lin Anlan loved him in those days when they got along.
But he didn't dare to look directly at Lin Anlan who had regained his memory, let alone hope that he would forgive him, because he knew that Lin Anlan before the memory loss did not love him, at least, not in love with him.
He had only been together for five months, and Lin Anlan avoided him for eight years. Compared with the two, five months seemed so insignificant, not enough to make him feel that he could shake Lin Anlan's mind.
What's more, he was still with him for five months on the basis of deceit.
"I'm sorry." He lowered his head, "I'm too selfish, I'm sorry."
Lin Anlan saw that he was about to bury his face in the bowl, but smiled softly, "You have apologized many times, and I received it, so there is no need to apologize again."
Only then did Cheng Yu dare to look up at him, and saw that he was calm and calm, drinking porridge.
"Do you hate me?" he asked.
Lin Anlan had heard this question, and Zosia asked him.
His answer at the time was not so much hate, and the answer is still the same now.
"I don't hate it so much." He said, "I said, we both have responsibility for this matter. My fault is that I shouldn't take the initiative to seduce your desires, desires and selfishness. Your fault is that you shouldn't be for yourself. Your selfishness and desire really deceived me. So I am the inducement and you are the main reason, but in the end, your responsibility is greater, so I can't think that you are not wrong at all, but if you want to talk about hatred, you can't say it. "
Hate this feeling is too serious and extravagant. Lin Anlan doesn't want to impose this feeling on himself. He hated his mother when he was a child. Later, he lived happily in the Lin family, so he erased his hatred, Along with erasing his mother.
He didn't want to give him any more affection. He left his affection to his adoptive parents. In his whole life, he only had one mother, and that was Mrs. Lin. As for his biological mother, he already knew what the other person looked like. forget.
She had already abandoned him, so how could she deserve such deep hatred from him.
Not caring is her best response.
So he wouldn't hate Cheng Yu, what's more, Cheng Yu really didn't have anything to hate him.
He had a very happy time when he lost his memory. Cheng Yu did his best to be nice to him. If he already had someone he liked before he lost his memory, or if he didn't deal with Cheng Yu, then he might hate him. But he had nothing.
He didn't like anyone, and he didn't hate Cheng Yu, so things were much simpler, not to mention, Cheng Yu taught him love.
He finally had a yearning and comprehension for love, instead of having no expectations for love as before, trapped in his own castle, not accepting other people's displays of love, and not taking the initiative to love others.
Yawen Library
Cheng Yu has become a very important person to him.
In this life, there are three kinds of feelings that are the most sincere and the most unbearable: family, friendship, and love. Among these three kinds of feelings, family is innate, blood is thicker than water, and it is the most reliable and easiest to obtain.
Lin Anlan's family relationship is a bit more difficult than others, but fortunately, he has obtained it, so he respects and loves his adoptive parents, who will always be the people he loves the most in his heart.
Friendship and love are the feelings that people acquire in interpersonal communication. These two kinds of feelings are not related by blood, so they need to be maintained on the initiative of human beings, and because they are born in interpersonal communication, many times, the first friend, the second A lover has become a very important existence to himself.
Jiang Xu was Lin Anlan's first friend, a friend who accompanied him through time and experienced many ups and downs. Therefore, he used to be very important, and Lin Anlan trusted him very much.
And Cheng Yu, Cheng Yu was the first person Lin Anlan liked and the first person who taught him love, so Cheng Yu naturally became Lin Anlan's most important person in the field of love.
He is like a person who has just set foot on a new territory, with confusion and yearning for the unknown field. He hesitates on this territory, not knowing whether to move forward.
But fortunately, he has a good lover, a man who is willing to wait patiently for him and love him all the time.
Therefore, Lin Anlan still has time to think, and has time to let herself think clearly.
Of course, before that, he had to make sure that his boyfriend would be less trembling and restless.
"I should actually hate you," he said, looking at Cheng Yu, "after all, you really lied to me, you are so courageous, no one has ever dared to lie to me like that, you know, I hate cheating, I I don't like being cheated, especially when you threaten others not to tell me I was cheated."
When he said this, he couldn't help but look at Cheng Yu, "How come I didn't see that you are so powerful before, and you dare to threaten other people's wives and children. You are much more powerful than I thought."
Cheng Yu: …
Cheng Yu bowed his head and apologized, "I was wrong."
"Of course you were wrong, and seriously wrong."
Cheng Yu lowered his head even lower.
"But it's also very strange," Lin Anlan said, "I know very well that you are wrong, but I can't blame you too much."
Cheng Yu looked at him in shock.
Lin Anlan looked down at the porridge in the bowl and slowly stirred it with a spoon.
"The day I left, it was more sad than the anger of being deceived. I am sad that you lied to me. I don't think you should lie to me, but if you don't lie to me, how do I know what kind of you are? Man, shouldn't you, will you?"
"The more I like you, the more angry and saddened I am. I haven't recovered my memory yet, so I'm very confused. I don't know if I should forgive you or not. I'm qualified to forgive you for me who has no memory loss, so I choose Leave, I want to calm down and think about it."
Cheng Yu listened quietly and did not speak.
"Later, I recovered my memory. In fact, I recovered my memory, but it was much easier than before. At least I have a complete memory. I can make the final call, so I'm actually a lot easier."
"You're also very lucky." He raised his eyes and glanced at Cheng Yu, "Before I lost my memory, I didn't like anyone else, no boyfriend, no girlfriend, not even a crush, although I avoided you. , but also because your father and Jiang Xu have nothing to do with you, let alone hate you, in this case, you made a mistake and it became my first love."
Lin Anlan remembered that when they recorded a variety show, he said that he was his first love.
Although the origin was incorrect, he was indeed his first love. It was just that the two of them had been together for too long. Eight years ago, Cheng Yu fell in love with him, and eight years later, he finally fell in love with Cheng Yu.
Although they are each other's first love, but after eight years, they have crossed the two stages of juvenile and youth.
"I tried to find your faults, your mistakes, so that I could hate you a little more, but I searched and searched and couldn't find it."
Lin Anlan looked at him, "You are fine."
He said, "You're a great person, a great lover, a great boyfriend."
"I am very happy to be loved by you, so I was very happy during the time when I lost my memory. Although I was deceived, my happiness is real. More than five months are full of happy memories. I can't find your faults and mistakes. , I can't find any other reason to hate you except that you lied to me in the first place."
He thought, if he didn't come to see Cheng Yu at that time, he went home alone, or went to Jiang Xu, then maybe he would pass the amnesia period peacefully and smoothly, but maybe it wouldn't be so pleasant Comfortable.
Cheng Yu brought him not only love but also a sense of security, so although he lost his memory, he was not afraid of anything. He knew that he could go to Cheng Yu when he encountered difficulties, and he could ask Cheng Yu when he had doubts. If you want to know but don't know, you can also consult Cheng Yu.
Cheng Yu knew everything, everything about him, everything about other people, and he was willing to do anything, as long as it was what he wanted.
He's not stupid. If it wasn't for Cheng Yu's performance from beginning to end, he was too reliable and trustworthy, and if Cheng Yu wasn't full of affection, tenderness and consideration for him from beginning to end, how could he never doubt their relationship? relation
The best way to deceive someone is to say everything you say is true and everything you do is true.
When everything is true, then there is no such thing as an illusion.