I Only Like Your Character Settings

Chapter 76: Original pain

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A sudden thank you made Xia Xiqing's ears warm. I have something to say in my heart, but I don't know where to start.

Zhou Ziheng squeezed his shoulders, pushed him to turn over, and hugged him from behind, with his chest pressed against his back, and pushed forward a little bit, "Mean Asia Group... It turns out that our brother Xi Qing is the eldest young master. Ah, if I knew you were so rich, I would let you take care of me."

Every time Zhou Ziheng called his brother, he was joking. Xia Xiqing elbows his stomach after taking it. "I can't afford to support your little son Zhou."

"Affordable." Zhou Ziheng kissed the back of Xia Xiqing's head from the back.

Xia Xiqing turned her head and raised her eyebrows at him, "You let me go and I will give you money."

Zhou Ziheng held his face so awkwardly and kissed his lips, "I'm going to stick it up." After saying that, he pushed Xia Xiqing's shoulders and walked forward, wanting to quickly change the subject.

I don't know when he will dispel this idea.

This villa is not small. The furniture inside is covered with white cloth. At first glance, it has been a long time without people. This scene reminds Zhou Ziheng of the first time he recorded "Escape from the Sky" with Xia Xiqing. It is also a lot of furniture covered with white cloth. , Gorgeous and deserted decoration.

"I'll take you upstairs to stroll around." Xia Xiqing spoke without emotional ups and downs, which made Zhou Ziheng a little worried. He already knew Xia Xiqing enough. The less emotional he was, the deeper he was hiding.

But Zhou Ziheng could only hold his hand tightly and stay with him.

The living room on the first floor has been raised, and there is about four meters high space, so the stairs are also very long. There is a handrail on the right side and a bookcase as high as the whole wall on the left side, filled with all kinds of Book. Xia Xiqing dragged Zhou Ziheng's hand and walked up step by step. Seeing that he had been on the bookshelf next to him, he said, "When I was a child, I used to sit on this staircase and read. Sometimes I leaned against it and fell asleep when I was tired."

As soon as he imagined that scene, the corners of Zhou Ziheng's mouth did not consciously arouse.

I really want to see him when he was a kid, he must be the best-looking child in the class.

Zhou Ziheng was dragged up to the second floor by Xia Xiqing. On the second floor, there is a deep corridor, like an art gallery in an art gallery. It is dark beige. On the opposite wall there are ten paintings in sequence, passing a room in between. Xia Xiqing tried to open the door, but it was not locked. He felt a little surprised and turned on the light at the door of the room.

"This is my mother's collection room." Xia Xiqing opened the door and stood by the door. Zhou Ziheng glanced at it. It was a very large room. Only when I entered it, I found that there was still a room in it. The cloth-covered picture frame is as big as a human being.

"These are all paintings?"

"Yes." Xia Xiqing nodded, thinking of the last time Xi Hui had told him about the opening of the art museum. Xia Yunkai didn't take these collections with him, and probably left them to him, but he didn't even take a special trip. Ask someone to keep it, and just keep it in the old house.

Yes, he hates his mother so much, and he hates himself so much. Seeing these paintings, he might want to burn them all up.

"My mother was born in an artistic family. When my grandfather was young, he was a famous sculptor, and my grandmother was a famous oil painter. Born in such a family, my mother naturally became a collector of art appreciation."

Xia Xiqing casually lifted the dust cloth on a painting, "She regretted her failure to become a painter all her life, no," Xia Xiqing smiled bitterly, "It's regret, it's resentment. She has no talent for painting. After trying for many years, she has been mediocre, but she can tell the quality of the painting at a glance, and excavated many painters who were not well-known at the time."

With the development of such a story, Zhou Ziheng can already guess the follow-up, "So, after your mother gave birth to you, she discovered your talent."

Xia Xiqing's fingers rubbed the picture frame lightly, "She just found a life-saving straw."

A deadly poison was also found.

He patted the palm of his hand and turned to another painting. “She felt that I had inherited the talents of my grandparents from generation to generation, so she forced me to learn painting since I was a child. I was only four or five years old at that time. I don’t understand, I’m locked in a small room every day, with only brushes and paints."

It looks colorful, but it's actually dark.

"I didn't want to learn at that time, and kept crying, so she scolded me and said something I didn't understand at the time. At that time, the relationship between her and Xia Yunkai became worse and worse, and she quarreled every day. Even fights."

For this so-called father, he still couldn't say it, so he could only use his name instead.

There was an abrupt dressing table in the collection room. Xia Xiqing paced to the mirror, staring at herself in the mirror in a trance.

In Zhou Ziheng's eyes, Xia Xiqing always has a distinctive temperament on her body, which is a delicate and fragile feeling, like a piece of white porcelain without any blemishes in silence, beautiful and fragile. But as he himself said, even if the work of art is broken, it is still a work of art. Each of his broken edges and corners is shining with beauty.

"Why do they get married?" Zhou Ziheng leaned against the door frame, "Marriage?"

The marriage between the art world and the business world is not uncommon in this circle. Although people in the art world are often upright and can't see the stinky merchants, the economic foundation determines the superstructure, and the art world that burns money is indispensable for capital. support.

"No, my grandfather can't look down on Xia Yunkai at that time." Xia Xiqing looked down at the dressing table. There were no cosmetics on it, but there were many delicate ornaments the size of palms, which should have been placed symmetrically. Now I don’t know how. Chaos, Xia Xiqing arranged them one by one, "I heard that my mother was marrying Xia Yunkai on her own will. Her eyes are only applicable to works of art, and she is too awkward to look at people."

After speaking, he turned around, holding the dressing table with his backhand and looking at Zhou Ziheng, "Think about it, she is a proud girl in the art world. The family broke up. As a result," Xia Xiqing lowered his head and smiled, "Looking at him looking for women outside one by one, each one is inferior to himself."

For a naturally arrogant person, it is tantamount to Ling Chi's execution.

"When she was pregnant with me, my mother went back to her mother's house. When she came back, she accidentally broke Xia Yunkai and the wild woman outside in their bedroom, and caught the rape in the bed." Xia Xiqing shrugged, "She was probably I hate it with me in my stomach."

He always said these words in such a relaxed tone, and Zhou Ziheng couldn't help him.

"Then... What happened later?"

"Later?" Xia Xiqing breathed a sigh of relief, "Later... She suffered from postpartum depression, and her whole appearance changed. But when she was outside, she had to pretend to be as dignified and generous as before. After returning home, she played again. Damn, sometimes it was upset with Xia Yunkai, sometimes holding me crying, and sometimes hitting me like Xia Yunkai." He smiled and pointed to the head, "There are several more times, holding me and standing. Outside the railing on the top floor, he said he would take me to death."

Seeing him smile like that, Zhou Ziheng's heart seemed to be stabbed hard.

He stepped forward, walked in front of Xia Xiqing, stretched out his hand to touch his face, and was avoided by Xia Xiqing. This hiding made Zhou Ziheng's heart more uncomfortable. But the next second Xia Xiqing put his head on Zhou Ziheng's shoulder again, and sighed almost inaudibly.

Zhou Ziheng touched the back of his head and kissed Xia Xiqing's head again. He was born in a happy family. He is almost unimaginable about the various things Xia Xiqing has encountered. People always say that he is worthy of others. But in Zhou Ziheng's eyes, these are nothing but empty words. He has not experienced it personally. The so-called empathy is just to paralyze his kind nerves. It’s just beautiful words.

"Are you pitying me now?" Xia Xiqing leaned against him, his voice cold, like a thin layer of ice, "This is just the tip of an iceberg."

Xia Xiqing is like an extreme child, constantly tearing his wounds in front of Zhou Ziheng, tearing it cruelly, and smiling to him and said, "Look, is this good-looking?"

Is this completely bad

Is this scary

Zhou Ziheng gently squeezed the back of his neck, "It must be fake to say that you are not pitiful." His fingers have a warmth of ironing, "I like you so much. Even if you are scratched by a small branch, I feel pitiful. For you. Pain, whoever makes me have such a temper, I will sympathize with people who don't like them." He hugged Xia Xiqing, "You are my favorite person, and you said I should not pity you."

"Anyway, you are a logical ghost." Xia Xiqing was too lazy to argue with him.

But when he heard Zhou Ziheng say this, he suddenly didn't want to go on, telling him that those things were too cruel for Zhou Ziheng.

"I'm quite curious, you should look like your mother." Zhou Ziheng squeezed his chin, raised his face, and kissed the tip of his nose gently.

Xia Xiqing didn't scold him again this time, just came out of his arms and led him to a suite inside. There was a cabinet in the suite. Xia Xiqing opened the third drawer and found a photo from it.

Zhou Ziheng originally thought this was a photo of Xia Xiqing's mother, but when he handed it over, it turned out to be an oil painting, which seemed to be taken at a certain exhibition.

The painting shows a woman sitting upright. With long black hair pulled to one side, his face was beautiful, his manners were noble, and his white neck was wearing a string of brilliant pearl necklaces. What Zhou Ziheng didn't expect was that the person in the painting was more like Xia Xiqing than he thought.

"If you put a mole on the tip of your nose, I believe it is you." Zhou Ziheng felt a little familiar, but of course he should be familiar, almost exactly the same as Xia Xiqing. He stretched out his hand to embrace Xia Xiqing's shoulder and touched it. To his ears, "Such women have completely proud capital."

It's as if you have the right to be proud.

Zhou Ziheng took the photo from him, squinted his eyes, and found a small label under the painting with a name written on it. A look of surprise appeared on his face, "Did you paint this?"

"Yeah." Xia Xiqing's eyes stared at the painting in the photo, "This was painted when I was fifteen years old, and it was also my first painting to be auctioned off. At that time, she had been away for five years. Painted in memory."

Even if he doesn't understand art, Zhou Ziheng can still see the tenderness and love hidden between the brushstrokes. Although this mother has done so many things to hurt him, in Xia Xiqing's eyes, it is always his mother.

"Why is it a photo?" Zhou Ziheng asked, "Where is this painting now?"

Xia Xiqing shook his head, "I don't know. This painting was bought in my mother's gallery. I asked someone to find out about it. It seems to be an ordinary collector. It was later sold overseas, and then I couldn't find it. ."

As a competent storyteller, Xia Xiqing raised his head, "Want to know how my mother died?"

Zhou Ziheng was stunned, his eyes softened.

Xia Xiqing wrapped his hands around his neck, and the corners of his mouth slightly curled up, "It's nothing, just say it all."

"Have you told anyone about these things?"

"I'm not the kind of scumbag who cheats others' sympathy with the so-called tragic experience." After saying that, he smiled and shook his head, "Well, I am a scumbag, but I am a scumbag by skill."

After saying this, Xia Xiqing was poked at Zhou Ziheng's forehead with a finger. He smiled and held Zhou Ziheng's finger, put it to his mouth and kissed it.

He really didn't want to say it. But the other party was Zhou Ziheng, and he didn't want to conceal it. After all, with such experience, he needed to be honest so that Zhou Ziheng had a choice.

After listening to it, consider whether or not to accept such a handicapped person.

"Xu Qichen doesn't know. He only knows that I used to be beaten by Xia Yunkai. There is no way to hide it. He is my tablemate." He twitched, "Xia Yunkai never beats me for the sake of her own face. Just hit me on the back with that kind of slender and long golf club, tie it up and hit it, or I will run."

He said vividly, his eyes were stubborn, "I still have to go to class after I can get out of bed. One time during my lunch break, Xu Qichen suddenly pushed me to wake up." At this point, he suddenly laughed, "Do you know what he did? People usually don't have any expressions. I can now recall his wide-eyed and panicked expression at the time," Xia Xiqing imitated Xu Qichen's appearance at the time, "Your back is bleeding, and your school uniform is stained."

"Then I can't help it. He is smart, and ordinary people who fight will be beaten like that." Xia Xiqing sighed, "But I still can't tell him anything else, otherwise the two are pitiful. Together, the days are too hard.” After speaking, Xia Xiqing laughed, put the photo back in the drawer, and led Zhou Ziheng out of the collection room and walked through the long gallery.

"My mother died of drug abuse." Xia Xiqing said these words as if unburdened. "Postpartum depression continued to worsen. She relied on drugs every day to stay decent in front of outsiders. To put it bluntly, outside. At that time, she was like an angel, and she became a madman when she returned home. She switched between the two for a long time, and later she couldn’t change her role freely.” At this point, he suddenly stopped, very seriously Looking at Zhou Ziheng's profile, he asked, "You said, I can act like this, is there a genetic reason?"

After speaking, he chuckled and continued to walk upstairs with the armrest.

Zhou Ziheng's hands were cold.

For the first time, he felt that his temperature was so small and not worth mentioning. Can he warm Xia Xiqing's heart when he is hollowed out

He is not sure.

"She emptied her mind to build an art gallery and named it after me. As a gift for my tenth birthday, she specially invited a French cake maker to make my cake into a sculpture, imitating the Maguhan Mo He's masterpiece "Mother Love" made everything decent." On the last step, Xia Xiqing stopped, as if waiting for Zhou Ziheng.

"Then, that museum..."

"Then she died on the day that the art gallery opened." Xia Xiqing continued to walk forward, without the slightest turbulence in her voice, "Convulsed all over and fell in front of me and my cake."

Zhou Ziheng took a step forward and took his hand, his fingertips were cold, out of tune with this hot and humid midsummer night.

"I didn't feel anything at all. Everyone panicked. I also said, it's okay. Mom often does this at home. She will be fine in a while." Xia Xiqing smiled, "Then she never got better."

Xia Xiqing paused in his footsteps, stopped in front of a dark blue door, and was silent for half a minute.

"I didn't eat a bite of that cake. What a pity, no one will make such a beautiful cake for me again."

Actually, it's not for me, it's for herself.

He held the doorknob with his hand, his fingers tightened, and he suddenly hesitated the moment he opened it.

Zhou Ziheng felt the change in his mood almost instantly. His shoulders were shaking, and the shaking became more and more severe. Like a patient with some kind of serious illness, his body began to be out of control.

"What's the matter?" He hugged Xia Xiqing, his tone a little hesitant, "This is... What room is this?"

Xia Xiqing lowered his head, biting his posterior teeth tightly so that he was not shaking so much. He thought he could easily face these pasts, thinking that those pasts have passed, and they are not enough to torture him. nightmare.

Pandora's box is always going to be opened.

"This is my room." The moment Xia Xiqing tried to overcome the cold war, he tried to turn the doorknob, and Zhou Ziheng's voice was warm, like a young gentle spring water, with a warm and dry palm covering him. Slowly dripping over, covered in this vulnerable layer of ice.

"If you really can't overcome it, it's okay." Zhou Ziheng's thumb rubbed gently against the back of his hand as always, "I can't bear it."

Reluctant to watch him walk into pain with his own eyes, it was really tormenting for him.

Xia Xiqing took a silent breath and pursed her lips.

"No, I need you." He raised his eyes to see Zhou Ziheng, "If you are not there, I will never dare to step in. Since you have the courage to let the superposition collapse." He hooked his mouth, "I can too. ."

After speaking, Xia Xiqing opened the door.

It was pitch black inside, and there was nothing to see. The heavy darkness swallowed everything completely, but those memories swept through like a tsunami, destroying the world.

Xia Xiqing turned on the light pretending to be calm. This room finally lit up. It was actually an ordinary children's room with dark blue wallpaper and ceiling, a small desk, and a lone single bed. The only difference is that the walls are covered with paintings painted by Xia Xiqing when he was a child.

Zhou Ziheng noticed that his windows and balcony were all fitted with iron railings.

It looks like a small prison.

"I remember you asked me during Truth or Dare, why you are afraid of the dark." Xia Xiqing's voice was heavy, like a rock gently placed on the lake, falling heavily and silently.

"As far as I can remember, I would cry every time they quarreled, and it might have affected them, so I was thrown into my small room, locked, and turned off the light, allowing me to reflect on myself in the dark. But I At that time, I didn't understand anything, I was only afraid."

He walked slowly to the railing on the balcony, grabbed it with his fingers and shook it twice, "It's still very strong."

"A visitor came to the house again. They had just finished fighting, and I kept crying, so naturally I was locked up, but I was so scared, so I ran to the balcony and cried loudly. The guest seemed to hear it. "Xia Xiqing sat with her back leaning on the railing, sitting on the ground, "In order to avoid this embarrassing thing from happening again, they locked the balcony once and for all."

Zhou Ziheng could hardly imagine how Xia Xiqing's childhood was spent in a deformed family.

"Oh, I almost forgot." Xia Xili took off his shirt, lowered his head and pointed at the old scar on his waist, "You have read this."

"My mother went crazy at home once and told me that it was because of my birth that her life was heading for misfortune." Xia Xiqing's eyes suddenly became wet, "It would be fine if I didn't exist." His hands were vacant. As if holding a sharp blade, it pierced into her body all at once, "She stabbed it in with her own hand, pulled it out, and then locked me here."

"She used to hold me and said that I was the only work of art she had created in her life. But then she complained so painfully that I was the culprit in her miserable life, and she must destroy me. ."

"But me," Xia Xiqing finally burst into tears, "I just want to be her child."

Zhou Ziheng almost collapsed. He stepped forward and hugged Xia Xiqing tightly. This person finally merged with the person who was crying silently in his arms, just as naked and painful.

"I was so young at that time, only five years old, right behind that door, I was covering the wound with blood in my hands, and screaming to Mom and Dad, no one came to save me."

"It's so dark in the room, there is no sound, there is only me, only me." Xia Xiqing trembled all over, tears like broken beads, "It would be fine if someone came to rescue me at that time."

I had hoped for love before.

I try my best to show off my brilliance and learn to be a kid who won't embarrass them.

But then I realized that what I need is not a luxury like love at all.

I just need someone to open this door for me when I am afraid.