I Only Like Your Made-up Persona

Chapter 42: Reciprocity

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In his 25 years of life, Xia Xiqing lived a very curious life. He tore his heart out of his body, leaving only his still shiny skin, squandering his life in this kaleidoscope-like complex and gorgeous world. He tried every possible way to get the analogue of love from others, desperately trying to fill his empty body with it. He swallowed it like a wolf, but he could not fill the bloody hole no matter what.

He used those negative emotions to nourish his artistic cells. If an artist doesn't drain himself, how can he create works that can move others

Xia Xiqing, who is infatuated with others, is safe and thinks she is safe. Everyone loves me, they all love me. How can I be miserable when I am like this

But now, it seems that such a strange person has appeared. He crossed the body and went straight to the weak heart that he had abandoned and hidden in the small dark room, approaching the most dangerous area directly.

Alarm bells were ringing.

Xia Xiqing's self-protective nature made him start to get scared.

"There won't be a next time, I promise." Xia Xiqing took the initiative to withdraw from the hug and skillfully gave Zhou Ziheng a cynical smile.

It's all just a stress response.

Zhou Ziheng was a little stunned. He originally thought that the hug could last a little longer.

Xia Xiqing patted his shoulder, stretched out his hand to the end of the passage, and said, "Let's go up." After that, he walked around Zhou Ziheng and walked forward step by step.

"… Um."

I was too obvious just now, too worried and too angry. Never mind, it doesn't matter.

The most important thing is that my heartbeat is too obvious.

The basement is so airtight that it makes people feel uncomfortable.

Zhou Ziheng followed behind him, step by step, and left the underground passage in silence.

According to convention, the guests held the camera to shoot the behind-the-scenes footage. Zhou Ziheng took the initiative to ask for a camera and walked to Ruan Xiao's side. "Let's form a group."

"We?" Ruan Xiao looked up in surprise at Zhou Ziheng, who had taken the initiative to invite her. Her eyes subconsciously searched for another person in the recording room. "... Are you sure?"

"Um."

"Why are you looking for me, Xia..."

Zhou Ziheng quickly interrupted, "I traveled through each time and space just to save you, and we were together in time and space No. 3 in the end."

Ruan Xiao looked at Zhou Ziheng with an expression that said, "What are you talking about?" "Uh... is this a reason?"

Zhou Ziheng thought about it seriously and proposed another topic of saving the country in a roundabout way, "Then I will go find Shang Sirui..."

"Wait a minute..." Ruan Xiao grabbed Zhou Ziheng and sighed, "Let me be in the same group with you." Before Zhou Ziheng started filming, Ruan Xiao bumped his arm and said, "Hey, what's wrong with you? Why aren't you with Xia Xiqing?"

"nothing."

"Did you have a fight? It can't be because he caused you to lose today!" Ruan Xiao's voice suddenly became louder.

Zhou Ziheng was a little annoyed and frowned unconsciously, "Yes, it was because of him that I lost."

In one sense, this reason is perfectly sufficient.

"I see... You two really are unwilling to admit defeat, which is a little different from what I imagined." Ruan Xiao laughed, "I thought you had a bad relationship at first, but sometimes I felt that you had a good relationship. It's so confusing, can't you just be affectionate all the time?"

This direction... Zhou Ziheng frowned and stared at Ruan Xiao who was smiling like an auntie, "Why do you want me to be so affectionate with him all the time?"

Ruan Xiao showed a subtle expression of "You know what I mean" and pushed Zhou Ziheng with her palm, "Because I am also a self-study girl!"

A program team, four guests, one is a fake fan who wants to sleep with his own, one is a CP fan who wants to watch him sleep with the fake fan, and the remaining one forms a rival CP with the fake fan...

Godly configuration.

"Do not make jokes."

"I'm not kidding you, I'm serious."

"No, please take off your meal."

"I won't, please give me some dog food!"

Ruan Xiao was making a fuss at the back, and Zhou Ziheng, who was walking in front, smiled and quickly dodged, camera in hand, and bumped into someone as he walked out of the room.

"Sorry..." The words of apology came out subconsciously, but he didn't expect that the person he bumped into was Xia Xiqing.

"It's okay..." Xia Xiqing covered her chest which was hit by the machine in Zhou Ziheng's hand. Her beautiful peach blossom eyes curved slightly, and she smiled sincerely but not so sincerely. Her eyes fell on Ruan Xiao who stopped walking after bumping into Zhou Ziheng's back. "What are you talking about? You look so happy."

Ruan Xiao was stunned for a moment, remembering that Zhou Ziheng didn't want to be grouped with him, so he defended him, "No, I'm just asking for selfie benefits on behalf of Ziheng's fans."

"Is that so?" Xia Xiqing pushed back the long hair that was scattered on her forehead, and returned her gaze to Zhou Ziheng, showing the longing smile that a fan should have, "You haven't posted a selfie in a long time, idol."

Zhou Ziheng had already figured out Xia Xiqing. He had deliberately emphasized the word "idol" to make people unhappy. He didn't know where Xia Xiqing's hostility came from at this moment and why he was angry with him.

It's as if he doesn't think he will get angry.

Zhou Ziheng half turned around, handed the DV to Ruan Xiao, took out the mobile phone from his pocket and swiped the screen to the right, and with his other hand, he forcibly pulled Xia Xiqing to his side, pressed Xia Xiqing's head with the hand around his shoulders, and held up the mobile phone screen with his right hand.

Xia Xiqing raised his head, and the moment he saw the screen, he turned his head to stare at Zhou Ziheng, and asked in a bad tone, "What are you doing?"

“Taking a selfie.”

The shutter sounded, and Zhou Ziheng let go of Xia Xiqing and checked the photos he had taken.

"Don't post on Weibo. I'm warning you."

"It's a fan benefit." Zhou Ziheng raised his eyebrows.

Although Xia Xiqing was angry, he still maintained his gentle smile as always, "Ruan Xiao, you saw it, it was this big star who insisted on dragging me into a couple relationship, and I was the one who was forced to take a photo unwillingly." After saying that, he called Shang Sirui, who was being pulled away by the stylist to touch up her makeup, and left the secret room.

"I'm sure now," Ruan Xiao clicked his tongue a few times, "you two must have had a fight."

Zhou Ziheng was too lazy to say anything else and put his phone back in his pocket.

"Hey, will you post the photos on Weibo later?" Ruan Xiao winked with a smile, "You can also send them to me on WeChat."

"Let's take some behind-the-scenes footage." Zhou Ziheng reached into his pocket and grabbed the phone that contained the group photo.

The behind-the-scenes shooting lasted nearly an hour, and it was almost midnight when it ended. Shang Sirui put his arm around Xia Xiqing's shoulders and said, "I asked my assistant to order the most famous Japanese food and sake here. They will be delivered to the hotel later. Everyone, come to my room to find me."

Ruan Xiao shook her head. "I'm so sleepy that I can't even open my eyes." She looked down at the watch on her wrist. "What time is it? If I keep eating and drinking and staying up late, I'll be as swollen as a pig tomorrow."

No matter how Shang Sirui threatened and lured him, Ruan Xiao insisted on going home to sleep. He had no choice but to focus all his firepower on Zhou Ziheng, pulling and tugging him, and acting like a spoiled child, "Don't run away, kid! We must not stop drinking today! I haven't had any free time in a long time, so why don't you accompany me for a drink~"

"I have to audition when I return to Beijing..."

Shang Sirui refuted him with a smug look on his face, "I asked Xiao Luo! Your audition is the day after tomorrow! Don't worry, it's just a night of fun, and sake won't make you drunk. Just treat it as a time to relax after your final exams, okay..."

Zhou Ziheng was being shaken by Shang Sirui's arm, and his ears were filled with all kinds of his soft and hard words, but it seemed as if they were filtered out, and he listened to the conversation between Xia Xiqing and Ruan Xiao standing aside without being affected.

"Xi Qing, you changed your perfume, didn't you? This one smells so good. I was attracted to it when I was at the airport."

"You mean the one on me? Oh, this is my... friend's perfume."

"What brand?"

"Super Cedar? I don't remember, but it was a kind of stupid name anyway."

"Haha, is it really okay for you to say that about your friend..."

I had forgotten about it originally, but was aroused by his vulnerable side and had the urge to protect him, forgetting his promiscuous nature.

Friend? I think it should be a sex buddy.

My heart started to ache again. It was dull and painful, but not painful at all, just painful and swollen.

"Okay." Zhou Ziheng raised his head and compromised with Shang Sirui. Shang Sirui, who had been clinging to him, was startled by the enemy's sudden surrender. After a half second of being stunned, he hugged Zhou Ziheng, "Really? Are you really going to accompany me? That's very nice. I'm so happy~"

After Ruan Xiao left, Shang Sirui dragged Zhou Ziheng and Xia Xiqing downstairs. Although it was almost midnight, there were still quite a few fans gathered downstairs, all girls. They started screaming when they saw Shang Sirui leading the way.

"Ahhh Sansan!"

"Fuck Xia Shangzhou is out!"

"Ahh my study hall!"

"Hengheng! Mommy loves you!"

Xia Xiqing wore a mask before coming out. Although he didn't like crowded environments, he still habitually showed his extremely friendly side. He walked over with his eyebrows bent and his head half lowered, and waved slightly to fans who excitedly called his name.

Shang Sirui was different. As an idol, he was no stranger to such scenes. He waved and greeted his fans quite familiarly.

Zhou Ziheng, who was walking at the end, was the only one who was not so friendly to them. Instead, he gave his fans a serious ideological education, "Thank you for waiting for so long, but it's so late, it's really dangerous. What if something happens on your way home? Who will be responsible?"

When the fans heard Zhou Ziheng say this, their screams suddenly quieted down, and like little animals accepting criticism, they responded in a low voice, "I know, we just want to see you..."

Xia Xiqing got into Shang Sirui's nanny car and heard Zhou Ziheng, who was following behind her, giving instructions to the girls in a low but gentle voice.

"Don't do this again."

A synonym for this sentence is probably "this will not happen again."

It turns out that there was something wrong with his defense system. He is just a habitual nice guy and is simply paying more attention to you, a dangerous person with unstable mental health.

It is extremely stupid to take his words of bias seriously.

Xia Xiqing sat next to Shang Sirui and leaned his head on Shang Sirui's shoulder after getting in the car.

"What's wrong?" Shang Sirui, who was playing with his mobile phone, turned his head to look at Xia Xiqing.

"Tired and hungry."

Shang Sirui smiled like a sunflower, raised his hand and gently patted Xia Xiqing's head, "It will be ready in a moment. I tell you, the Japanese food is really delicious... Their wine is not bad, but I heard that the wine in that hotel is also good..."

"Let's take a selfie."

Xia Xiqing suddenly spoke, interrupting Shang Sirui who was chattering.

"ah?"

"Take a selfie and post it on Weibo. Didn't we just finish recording the show? They've been waiting for so long, let's give them some benefits." Xia Xiqing's voice was very soft, and she spoke seriously, with her head still resting on him.

"Yeah, give some candy to our CP fans hahaha."

As a member of a boy band who has been forced by the company to be gay for many years, Shang Sirui is already very familiar with this routine. He took out his mobile phone and took a photo in this pose. In order to show the top and bottom, he also deliberately made a cool raised eyebrow expression. He originally wanted to reach out and touch Xia Xiqing's chin, but found that he was wearing a mask, so he had to change to pointing at him with his index finger.

The shutter sounded, Xia Xiqing raised his head, took off the mask, and crumpled it into a ball in his palm.

Zhou Ziheng, who hadn't noticed anything, closed the car door and sat on the single seat next to the bed on the right side. He looked through the window with some worry at the group of girls still standing outside.

He lowered his head and just fastened his seat belt when he heard Shang Sirui yelling at him excitedly, "Hey Ziheng, please like my Weibo! I just posted it~"

After saying "oh" in a perfunctory manner, Zhou Ziheng took out his mobile phone, opened the Weibo homepage and refreshed it.

Sure enough, Shang Sirui’s new Weibo post appeared.

[hfive Shang Sirui: I recorded a self-destructive player who was autistic during the recording.]

The accompanying picture was a selfie he had just taken. In that photo, Xia Xiqing, wearing a mask, leaned obediently on Shang Sirui's shoulder, revealing only his deceptively beautiful eyes, harmless and innocent.

what is this.

Zhou Ziheng accidentally pressed the home button due to a shaking hand and exited the Weibo interface. He paused for a second, clicked on the album, and stared at the latest thumbnail in the [Camera Roll] album, the so-called group photo that he had forced himself to take.

He was so angry that he clicked on the photo directly, with his thumb hovering in the air over the small blue trash can icon in the lower right corner.

He clenched his back teeth tightly, clicked the icon heavily, and selected the [Delete Photo] option in anger.

Then Zhou Ziheng returned to the Weibo interface, feeling neither relieved nor relieved, and liked Shang Sirui's Weibo post.

She turned her head unconsciously, but happened to meet Xia Xiqing's eyes. He was leaning lazily on the back of the chair and looking at her with a half-smile on his face.

Zhou Ziheng almost sneered, but Xia Xiqing stuck out her tongue at him.

His chin was slightly raised, like a naughty three-year-old child.

The author has something to say: Xia Xiqing has been turned into a primary school kid by Zhou Ziheng, it's unbearable to watch.

Countdown to the [official ambiguous period]...

By the way, I opened an ao3 account, and I will post (…) on Weibo when the time comes.jpg

I know that many readers don't like a seesaw relationship, and prefer a straightforward, smooth relationship. However, Xia Xiqing has an avoidant attachment personality. If he could have a smooth and normal relationship, would he have been in love long ago? Would he wait to be saved by Zhou Ziheng? Moreover, Zhou Ziheng is a pure little virgin with no experience in love. If he confesses his love to be together right away, the character of both of them will collapse.

My original intention in writing this character was to discuss the issues of original family and avoidant attachment personality. This is very meaningful to me, so if you really don’t like this kind of plot, just give up. Thank you for your support until now. I am very grateful, but I still want to write what I want to write.