23. Crazy (Part 2)
When Luo Yilin's breathing stabilized, Bai Jiming asked, "Are you going to live like this?"
"Ha, what else can I do? I'm a fucking monster. UC Novel Network:" Luo Yilin sneered exaggeratedly.
Bai Jiming closed his eyes helplessly and sighed in his heart. Adults sometimes speak without thinking, but they don't know that they have caused great harm to children. "Don't pay attention to others," he said as calmly as possible, "The key is how you see yourself. No one can live in this world for you. In just a few decades, why bother to care about other people's eyes..."
Luo Yilin pulled the corner of his mouth and interrupted Bai Jiming: "Don't tell me these useless truths. How can you not care? Do you dare to run out and say loudly that I am gay? Who the hell do you dare to tell it to?"
"Now the whole world is slowly trying to accept..."
"Accept? How to accept? Like those idiotic women just now?" Luo Yilin pointed at the door, "What sympathy and support? I need your sympathy? I need your support? Who are you? What else can you do besides asking me those boring questions? What else can you do besides being curious? Is this what you call acceptance? Would they ask a normal person how to do it? Would they casually inquire about their love process? Do they know what the relationship between the same sex is? In their eyes, they are nothing more than two pleasing men, snooping into each other's privacy to satisfy their infinite desires. Fuck you, is this what you call acceptance?"
Bai Jiming thought of Cheng Xiangyu and bit his lip. "You are too extreme." He said in a calm tone, "It's like meeting a blond foreigner on the street. Everyone has to take a second look. Why are you so sensitive about this? Is it that they can't accept it, or is it that you can't accept it deep down in your heart? Even if they are wrong, the consequences should not be borne by you. You gave up your life and your dreams just to resist their discrimination against you? I know you resent that senior brother for abandoning you at the critical moment; you resent your parents for abandoning you from the beginning. But now, you are also abandoning yourself. What is the difference between you and them? You are all cowards, you don't have the courage to face pressure, you don't have the courage to fight for what you want."
"Do you have it?" Luo Yilin asked. Bai Jiming was startled and listened to him repeat, "Do you have the courage? Have you fought for what you wanted?"
Bai Jiming said nothing, and lowered his eyes as he thought of his rejection and coldness towards Liao Weixin.
Luo Yilin sneered: "Do you know what I hate most about your teacher? You can't do it yourself, but you insist on asking others to do it."
Bai Jiming jumped off the table and slowly walked to the window. It looked sunny outside, but when he got closer he realized that the wind was strong, making the dry branches of the poplar trees sway left and right.
He exhaled and said slowly: "I know there is darkness in this world, but I can only describe the light to students; I know there is helplessness and sadness in life, but I have to give students confidence and optimism; I know that this world is not fair, but I ask students to believe in justice and fairness. Maybe I don't have the courage, but I can give my students courage. Maybe it is because I can't do it, I hope that others can do it. In this way, life will have hope and dreams will have value." He looked directly into Luo Yilin's eyes, "Your destiny is your own. Whether it is laughter or sadness, pain or happiness, you have to bear it yourself. Anyone, no matter how close they are to you, is just a passer-by in your life. It's just that some people will accompany you for a long time, and some people will pass by in a flash. Who are you living for?"