I Trick Even the Lames to Stand Up for Me

Chapter 88: If you don't cry, you count me as a loser

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Fu Ximing tried his best to persuade his wife to come back: "The master is here, what are you afraid of? It's just a kowtow as a daughter-in-law, and it's over after being cremated. Even if you do it for me, come back... You won't be able to make it through if you don't come back. , what if she makes trouble again? She has come to me for the past two days, and I almost died, you know? How do you three live when I die, you have to raise two children by yourself. "

When his wife heard this, she was also scared, "Okay, I'll go back, the child doesn't need to go back."

Fu Ximing also took a step back, "The child doesn't need to come back, you can take it to your mother."

Hearing this, Gu Ye pouted and beckoned to Xie Cheng, "Let's go, let's find out, where is the old lady hiding?"

Gu Ye and Xie Cheng walked around and found a large chimney on the opposite hill in the east of the village. Gu Ye pointed to it, "There is a corpse there."

"Wow, how did you figure it out? Why didn't I learn it?"

Gu Ye was disgusted, "Did you really study hard?"

Xie Cheng laughed twice, "Are you really only twenty years old? How did you learn so much?"

"My master left a lot of books for you to read another day."

Xie Cheng was stunned for a moment, Gu Ye was too generous, and even showed him the things of his sect. He was moved, and waved his hand quickly, "Forget it, no need, the book knows me, I don't want to know it."

Gu Ye has already despaired of this heartless person. He goes to school if he likes it, and not if he doesn't like it. Why didn't Elder Tang kill him

Finally meeting a passing villager, Gu Ye asked with a smile, "Master, what is that?"

As soon as they were dressed, they knew that they were not locals. The uncle asked with a smile: "You two are here to travel? That place is not a good attraction. It used to be a brick-burning place, and it has long since been abandoned. The road is very difficult to walk. You two don't go, it's dangerous."

Gu Ye nodded obediently. After thanking the uncle, he looked at the "tsk tsk" mouth there, "No, it's too tiring to climb up."

Xie Cheng has already gone back, "Let's wait for her to come, it's too hot, go back to the car."

Two hours later, Xia Yanjun, Fu Ximing's wife, came back. Xie Cheng raised his eyebrows and asked, "The distance between the two is not very far. It's a two-hour drive, so you don't usually come back?"

Xia Yanjun smiled awkwardly, "This is really busy with work."

When she laughed, her voice was dull, and the laughter seemed to be squeezed out of her throat. There was a saying, "Laugh at Xian with a long voice, and the voice in the throat is wicked." Gu Ye saw that she knew that it was not a good thing. Too lazy to talk to her.

Xia Yanjun asked, "Have you found my mother-in-law's body?"

Xie Cheng raised his eyebrows and said condescendingly, "Won't she come back by herself at night?"

The couple were scared, "Will she have to wait for her to come back..."

Gu Ye said lightly: "As long as you listen to me, she will not hurt you. Are you ready for the funeral?"

The two of them laughed dryly, not ready for anything.

Gu Ye said angrily: "Go to prepare now, the linen and filial cloth are ready, the old man's shroud and coffin, aren't you ready?"

Fu Ximing said quickly, "I'll prepare right away."

"Just the two of you, what about the funeral? Go to someone for help, aren't there a lot of neighbors here?"

Fu Ximing said embarrassedly: "They are not coming, they are all afraid."

Gu Ye's face was cold, "If they don't dare to come, then go to invite them, go from house to house and kowtow to invite them. Do you still need me to teach this kind of thing?"

"This... go kowtow?" Xia Yanjun's facial features were all wrinkled, and he went to kowtow to someone he didn't know. What kind of thing is this!

Xie Cheng couldn't stand it any longer, "If you want to survive, just do it and invite everyone over, especially the elders in the village. Do you have to sew your filial clothes yourself?"

Xia Yanjun asked dissatisfiedly: "How can there be such a troublesome funeral in this era?"

Gu Ye asked back: "How can there be someone who is so angry at the old lady in this era? If you don't do this, will you be able to calm her old man's anger?"

Although Xia Yanjun was aggrieved, she knew that she was unreasonable. In order to resolve this matter, she had to swallow her anger.

Fu Ximing hurriedly rounded up the game, "We'll go in a while, what else is there to do?"

Gu Ye said lightly: "Invite the helper back and buy everything. In the evening, the two of you will kneel at the door wearing sackcloth and filial piety, kneeling to bring the old lady back."

Xia Yanjun was a little annoyed. Just as he was about to speak, Fu Ximing grabbed her and said, "Stop talking, we will listen to the master."

Gu Ye glanced at Xia Yanjun, "Go and invite someone now, you won't be idle tomorrow, so prepare yourself mentally."

The two went back to the car and sat down. Gu Ye called home, "Mom, I won't go back tonight. You don't need to find me at home. It will take at least two days to go back."

Mrs. Gu said worriedly: "Be careful, you can't buy some gastrointestinal medicine and prepare it first, but don't eat the rice in the mountains and have diarrhea."

Gu Ye didn't know whether to laugh or cry, did this fucking posture really give up the fourth child? Here comes my son!

After hanging up the phone, Gu Ye asked Xie Cheng: "What should we eat tonight, there's not much leftovers."

Xie Cheng smiled and said, "I have already checked the nearby restaurants and hotels, and out of this small mountain village, there is a resort 60 kilometers north, where you can eat and live."

Gu Ye was speechless, "Are you rich?"

"You have it!"

"I don't have it, please invite me tonight!"

"I invite... I can only invite you to eat instant noodles, and have a luxury tonight!" Xie Cheng patted his thigh and said excitedly: "You can have two hams per person, plus a pack of spicy sticks!"

Gu Ye Fu forehead, how poor is it

——

Fu Ximing and his wife went to kowtow to the neighbors together and asked someone to help. Now every family is afraid because of the old lady's corpse, and no one wants to come. , said it so sincerely, and I heard that the master was invited over, and the neighbors couldn't save their face. After being vague for a long time, they hesitated and said: "Okay, I'll be there in a while."

After finally inviting one, the couple went to another house to kowtow. It took two hours to invite the elders and people who could help in the village. It was half past four at this time.

After coming, the elders asked, "You have nothing, what should we do?"

Fu Ximing left his wife to entertain everyone, and he took a few people to the town to buy things for the comprador's funeral. They tossed it until it was almost evening before they came back.

Several old ladies sewed filial piety clothes and hats while scolding Xia Yanjun, "You were not filial when your mother was alive, you deserved it."

Xia Yanjun blushed with anger, but she couldn't help but drive them away. The more she is like this, the more these old ladies find her disliked. I didn't want to say much, but now I can't bear it anymore. You run a word, I say a word, and Xia Yanjun ran out of the house in anger, swearing to her husband, "This matter is over, I will never come to this village again. All the people in this backcountry are swindlers! If I come back, I will die!"

Fu Ximing coaxed: "Then you have to fool today's affairs first. You go and take out all the vegetables I bought, make a table, and invite the villagers who help to eat."

"They scold me and I still serve them?"

"We can't be too troublesome, we can't be afraid of spending money, and don't make a sound when we feel wronged. Life is gone, nothing is gone, you understand."

Xia Yanjun had no choice but to follow suit. However, none of the villagers stayed to eat their meals, and left after finishing the work, leaving a table of dishes hanging on the table.

Xia Yanjun said angrily: "They don't eat it, let's eat it ourselves!"

Fu Ximing stood up, "I'll go and invite those two masters in, let's eat together."

Xia Yanjun rolled his eyes and muttered in a low voice, "I don't know where the two masters with hairless mouths were invited, just tossing around."

Fu Ximing found Gu Ye and the others, and asked, "Two masters, do you want to come home for dinner?"

Gu Ye held the instant noodles, "No need, we bought it ourselves."

Xie Cheng invited them for dinner. They went out to a supermarket, bought a few buckets of instant noodles and ham sausage, borrowed the pots from the villagers to boil a few bottles of mineral water, and hadn’t eaten instant noodles for a long time, Gu Ye felt that he was still Very fragrant.

Xie Cheng opened a box of leftover cans at noon, and said indifferently, "Our Master Gu is squeamish. We can only use mineral water to make meals. If you eat your meal, he will feel sick and have diarrhea. Please come back."

Fu Ximing knew that they looked down on him, so he left in embarrassment, and he didn't feel good about it. Filial piety comes first. Filial piety is a traditional Chinese virtue, but he is looked down upon by everyone because he is not filial.

After eating, Gu Ye and the others squatted in the car for a while, and Fu Ximing came over again and asked in fear, "It's already dark, do you two want to sit at home?"

Gu Ye and Xie Cheng got out of the car and went into the house to have a look. Everything was ready. The door was open and there was a small bed facing the door. This was for the old lady.

Gu Ye pointed to the door, "The two of you will kneel at the door and wait for the old lady to come back."

Because Fu Ximing persuaded his wife again during the meal, and his wife no longer resisted, the two cooperated to get dressed and knelt at the door tremblingly.

Gu Ye and Xie Cheng moved a stool by themselves and sat in the yard, waiting for the old lady to come back. Seeing that it was after eleven o'clock, the kneeling legs of the couple were numb, and a cat meow came from outside the door.

"Come here, she's back." Fu Ximing was so frightened that his wife wanted to run.

Xie Cheng tapped the leg of the chair with a whip, "Don't move, kneel, whoever moves your mother will catch you first!"

The couple were so frightened that they knelt down and didn't dare to move. The figure of the old lady ran in quickly and moved very quickly. Seeing the son and daughter-in-law, who were wearing ma and filial piety, they were obviously stunned and stood still.

Xie Cheng jumped up excitedly, "Damn, this is the legendary walking corpse? It's the first time I've seen it! It's really a cat face! She looked at me! Gu Ye, she looked at me! What should I do?!"

Gu Ye's mouth twitched, "Shut your mouth! Scare her away! Catch it!"

"How to catch a walking corpse? I haven't caught it!"

"Grab like a ghost, where's your whip?"

"Okay!" Xie Cheng threw the whip out of his hand and wrapped it around the old lady's body. His whip was specially made with something to restrain evil spirits, but it was not comparable to Fu Ximing's fishing net. The old lady struggled a few times, but did not break free, and was dragged to her side by Xie Cheng in the next second.

The talisman paper in Gu Ye's hand was immediately thrown out and stuck to the forehead of the old lady, and the old man stopped moving immediately.

Looking closely at her cat face, it was even more frightening. The hair on her face was already very thick, and it was impossible to tell that it was a person. Especially the green eyes, the more you look, the more horrifying the old lady's face is facing her son and daughter-in-law, and the kneeling couple almost fainted in fright.

Gu Ye glared at them, "What are you doing stupidly, kowtow nine times, please go back!"

Xie Cheng reminded: "It must be loud, or your mother won't hear it."

The couple were almost scared to death. After hearing this, they quickly kowtowed their heads. The man kowtowed and cried, "Mom, I'm sorry for you! I know it's wrong! My son kowtows to you!"

Gu Ye and Xie Cheng looked at each other and carried the old lady back to the bed to lie down. They came at just the right time. The old lady's body didn't become rigid or rotted any more. Her body was full of ghosts, and the cat's soul had melted into her body. If it comes a few days later, the old lady will be completely a zombie, the kind who bites whoever.

Gu Ye gestured, "Hold her down, I'll pull out the cat's soul."

Xie Cheng stood at the head of the bed and held down the old man's shoulder. Gu Ye squeezed a finger in his left hand, took out a cinnabar pen in his right hand, and drew a magic talisman in the air, pressing it on the old man's forehead to hook the cat's soul. After staying, pull it out hard.

Naturally, the cat didn't want to come out, and screamed shrilly. As she barked, the old man's body struggled constantly, and Xie Cheng, who was so strong, could hardly hold back. The thunder light in Gu Ye's left hand slashed, and the cat's spirit was immediately exhausted. Taking this opportunity, Gu Ye pulled out the cat's soul and put it in a small bottle. The old man's body didn't move for a moment, and the hair on his face subsided little by little, becoming the original appearance. The corpse spots are already serious, and the rancid smell is more obvious.

Gu Ye said to the couple, "You two kneel down for a night and guard your mother's spirit. The incense can't be stopped, and the crying can't stop. Don't try to be lazy. If you let her get up again, no one can save you."

"We know, we're on our knees."

After the scene just now, both of them were terrified. Now their legs are soft, let them get up, but they don't dare to get up. Now what Gu Ye said, they all acted like a decree, so they just knelt abruptly for the night. , humming and crying all night.

The next morning, Gu Ye, who had slept in the car, told Fu Ximing: "Get up and move around, have dinner, go to the neighbor's house to invite someone, take your mother's body to cremation, and bury it in the afternoon."

The two of them breathed a sigh of relief. After being cremated, she wouldn't be able to lift the corpse, and they wouldn't have to suffer.

Xie Cheng reminded secretly: "Don't think that the burial is over, people die, but the soul is still there? The first seven, three seven, five seven, and it's not over."

The couple was so frightened that their expressions changed again, and they asked in dismay, "So troublesome?"

"Trouble? You can be filial when you are alive, can you have this day? It would be good to save your two lives." Gu Ye waved his hand in disgust, "Hurry up."

The two knelt for a whole night, they could barely walk, and their voices became hoarse. They helped each other to find some leftovers, and ate two random bites. Looking at the old lady lying at the door again, they were terrified and wished they could bury her all at once.

The couple gritted their teeth and insisted, and went to kowtow to the neighbors to invite someone. They heard that the old lady had been found, but everyone dared not come. The lips of the couple were almost torn apart, and those who kowtowed almost fainted, so they invited a few people over.

The main reason was that the old lady's body was already smelly, and the weather was hot now, otherwise Gu Ye would have tossed the couple for a few days. Going to cremation in the morning, the couple also kneeled to send them away, kneeled to greet them, and their knees were broken.

Fu Ximing's father died early, his mother was to be buried with his father, and the grave had to be dug up. , is made for others to see. Crying and crying, I really can't cry, I'm tired and want to die, I'm tired and crying.

Finally, the old lady's ashes were buried. The two of them were lying on the ground in front of the grave. They couldn't get up after knocking their heads on the ground. They were so exhausted that they almost fainted.

Gu Ye stood behind the two of them indifferently, "You two can't bear it now? This matter is not over yet, is your mother still watching you in the spirit of heaven?"

The two of them kneeled there stiffly, and Fu Ximing's wife burst into tears, "Why is it not over yet? I don't want to live anymore after all this tossing!"

"Okay then," Gu Ye looked at the grave seriously, "does the old lady hear? Your daughter-in-law wants to serve you there."

"No! I didn't mean that!" Xia Yanjun was frightened by Gu Ye's serious attitude, could it be that her mother-in-law was really watching them? She hurriedly kowtowed to her mother-in-law and said in horror: "What else needs to be done, we will do it!"

Gu Ye said lightly: "It takes seven, seven, forty-nine days to walk through a Yama Temple to reach the end. During these seven, seven, forty-nine days, your mother-in-law may come back at any time."

The couple kneeling on the ground turned pale with fright, "Then, what should we do?"

"It's very simple, you two put on sackcloth and filial piety every day, kneel for seven, seven, forty-nine days, until the old man is gone, then you can go back."

When the two heard that they had to kneel for so many days, did they have to kneel for a summer vacation? The skin will be peeled off even if it is hot, and both of them have expressions of protest on their faces.

Xie Cheng knocked on the whip in his hand, and rubbed it secretly: "If you want to survive, you have to kneel. In the future, during the festivals, the first and fifteenth days of the new year, don't forget to burn incense and burn paper. Open wide, the old man can come back to see you."

The couple was frightened by this sentence, and Fu Ximing had regretted it at this time. If he had been filial, he would not be today.

When Gu Ye was about to leave, he opened the lid of the small porcelain vase and buried it in the old man's grave. Xie Cheng saw it and didn't ask at the scene. He didn't ask Gu Ye until he left the small village: "You left that cat's soul behind?"

Gu Ye explained: "This cat was raised by an old man. It was an old cat in his twenties. Because the owner died, he was too sad and died of heart failure. This time, the old man took half of the credit for his corpse. . This animal, especially those who live for a long time, has spirituality. I told it, if the couple did not do what I said, they would not kneel for seven, seven, forty-nine days..."

Xie Cheng smiled, "This old cat has to torment them."

Gu Ye smiled, "Yes, and they are not filial, the cause and effect have been owed, and they will get retribution from their children."

Xie Cheng said with emotion: "I still answer that sentence, sleep in the old cat room, it will be passed down from generation to generation."

Send Xie Cheng back first, Gu Ye also took the opportunity to look at Elder Tang, and before leaving, told Xie Cheng, "If you encounter such a disgusting bastard in the future, don't ask me, and deal with it yourself."

Xie Cheng nodded and agreed, but he didn't believe what he promised. Just now, he received another list of "Dad's ghost wants to kill me", which is probably not a good thing, but if he said it now, I'm afraid Gu Ye will make friends with him. He decided to hold back until tomorrow.

Gu Ye drove home. His parents were in his own company, and he had not finished get off work yet. Only Gu Yang played games at home. The child's pursuit has changed. The goal of life has changed from flying a plane to driving an armored vehicle, to building a rocket, driving a submarine, and then becoming a doctor, a policeman, and a scientist... Finally, the child has set his last goal in life: to do A professional gamer with ideals, morals and dreams!

Therefore, children still work hard to play games after their parents beat them countless times.

Gu Ye narrowed his eyes and pointed his finger at his younger brother, "Fourth, come here."

Gu Yang ran over, already a head taller than Gu Ye, tall and strong, the only constant is the smile on his face, clean and pure, with a bright face.

Gu Ye said deeply: "My stupid brother, you have grown up. As a brother, I have an obligation to let you know the sinister world, the complexity of society, and the darkness of human nature."