The black-eyed boy was a little confused.
He felt that there must be something wrong with his ears.
Or something is wrong with his brain.
Or else he was dreaming—
But the coolness of the fingertips holding his hands was so clear, penetrating through the skin, telling him that everything that happened at this moment was reality.
Everything that happened suddenly made Mute at a loss, and he could only stare at Major General Troll in a daze.
The major general, who was squatting in front of him with his left knee bent and holding his hand, looked at him as if with flames in his eyes, which were scalding and painful.
There seemed to be a cluster of flames burning deep in the deep dark blue pupils, and his face was reflected in the burning flames.
I wanted to tear my smiling face away and say "Major General, you must be joking" to get over the situation in front of me, but those blue eyes that were staring deeply at him made him part his lips, and he still couldn't get rid of that sentence after all. Words come out.
This man is serious.
Mut, who realized this, suddenly panicked.
When Major General Troll asked him to be his partner, he could refuse without hesitation, because he knew that the major general had no feelings for him, just to see the earth in his memory.
Naturally, he would not have any psychological burden to reject a person who didn't like him for an impure purpose.
He always felt that if someone as arrogant as Major General Troll rejected him once, he would definitely not have any good feelings for him again.
Therefore, even if the major general was obviously different from him, he didn't think about that at all—although he claimed to like men, he was still only interested in girls after all, that was his nature—so even if he and men Be more intimate, even if he sleeps on the same bed with a man, he doesn't take it seriously at all, and doesn't think about other aspects at all.
He didn't know when the major general had special feelings for him.
But he could see the way the man looked at him, as if there were flames churning, making him unable to avoid his eyes.
The man looked at him more focused and persistent than anything else.
He couldn't resist that look.
He shouldn't be perfunctory either.
And he suddenly felt a little sad and blamed himself.
He thought that no one would like someone who was destined not to like himself.
So, if it wasn't because he lied, if he misled the major general by not saying 'I like men' in the first place, wouldn't the major general not like him
He doesn't know what it's like to be rejected, but he knows it must be hard.
The teenager lowered his eyes, and the thin eyelashes covered his eyes, casting light shadows on his cheeks.
He slowly pulled his held hand out of the cool palm, his eyes were lowered, the scattered black hair blocked his eyes, he didn't dare to look at the major general's face in front of him.
"… sorry."
he said softly.
It is impossible to say that he has no feelings for Major General Troll.
Although it was only a few tens of days, he had experienced too many things with him. He respected this man and admired his strength.
He was also deeply grateful to him for saving his life several times by men.
He trusted this man, he was willing to do many things for him, and he already had deep feelings for him.
But, only this one thing, he can't do it.
sorry.
He could only give this answer.
sorry.
It was an answer to that sentence, and an apology to him for lying.
I'm sorry I can't like you.
I'm sorry I lied to you.
The young man lowered his head, pursed his lips tightly, and clenched the hand he took out from the major general's palm into a fist, and put it on his lap, clenched tightly and forcefully.
If it was said that he refused the first time without any burden, then this time the rejection made him feel very uncomfortable.
He didn't even dare to look up into the major general's eyes.
He recalled the expression on that handsome face just now. At that time, the major general looked at him, raised his lips and smiled softly, as if it made everything fade away.
…
And now, what will be the expression on that face
Mute lowered his eyes, and from his sight, he could only see the pair of hands that were still hanging in the air. There was nothing in those hands, and they just stopped in mid-air alone.
He looked at the hands that seemed to be holding something but only holding air. His chest was heavy, as if he was pressed by something heavy, making it difficult to breathe.
After a while, the right hand moved.
He watched the hand lift up and stretch out, and the cool fingers stroked the hair on the side of his ear.
"… I see."
He heard the deep voice reaching his ears, so faint that he couldn't hear anything.
The major general stood up, stroked the hair beside his ear, and kissed the forehead on the other side of his head.
It was blocked by thick black hair, and most of the lips fell on the hair, and only a little rough feeling grazed the skin of his forehead through the gaps in the hair.
Then, he watched the major general's standing legs turn around, took a step, and slowly left his sight.
For some reason, there was an impulse that made him unable to hold back his head any longer.
He opened his lips, trying to call out to that person, but after opening and closing several times, he still didn't make any sound. He just watched that person's back disappear from his sight.
The boy took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and clenched his hands on his knees.
Since it is impossible, the other party should not be given any hope.
It's better to cut the two cleanly and cleanly than to cut the roots.
...
…………………
That night, even though he figured out what he was struggling with, Mute still tossed and turned until very late.
The empty hand that was hanging in mid-air without holding anything kept reappearing in his mind, making his chest a little tight.
He doesn't regret what he did, but he still feels uncomfortable after all.
He thought that maybe he should find time to confess to the major general that he had cheated the major general about his sexuality, even if he was beaten up, it didn't matter.
If so, it would make him feel better.
Thinking of this, Mute finally fell asleep slowly.
When I woke up, the sky was already bright, and the fiery red canopy outside the window was shaking in the wind, as if welcoming the arrival of the morning sun. The bright sunlight fell on the cheeks of the young man who was lying sideways on the bed. It was so bright that he slowly opened his eyes.
The thin eyelashes moved, lifted up, and fell down again. Obviously Mutt was still half awake and half asleep, blinking in a daze.
However, with just a blink and a swish, the boy's eyes suddenly opened wide.
The boy's eyes were wide open with a frightened expression on his face, and he stared straight ahead—
Hair as black as satin was softly scattered on the snow-white pillow, and the man lay sideways beside the boy.
He closed his eyes, apparently in deep sleep.
His arms held Mute in his arms, and Mute almost nestled on his chest. When he raised his head, his forehead almost touched the man's chin.
The distance between the two was terribly close, that's why he was terrified by the face that was so close to him just now.
The major general fell asleep peacefully, his extremely handsome face seemed to be emitting a soft gleam at this moment,
It's not good for the heart to be shocked by beauty as soon as you open your eyes early in the morning!
In every sense, the frightened boy felt his heart beating violently.
no no no—
The point is, why is the major general in his room and on the same bed as him? !
Although I'm used to being used as a pillow when I wake up in the morning after my spiritual attunement... But I didn't have my spiritual attunement last night!
Just when Mute looked at Major General Troll in surprise, the Major General seemed to be woken up by him.
The slender black eyelashes trembled slightly as if being swept by the wind, and then slowly lifted up.
The pupils of the azure gemstones that seemed to be brewing with water vapor leaked hues from the eyelashes, half asleep, half awake, and Troll, who seemed not very awake, looked at the boy in his arms with such trance eyes glance.
"… Um… "
It was a muffled sound that was obviously not awake.
Perhaps it was because he had just woken up, and the voice was not only low, but also a little hoarse.
And because the two were too close, the hoarse and somewhat lazy voice seemed to come out from the boy's ear and seep into the depths of his eardrum.
Mutt raised his hand abruptly and covered his ears.
Red in the face.
He himself didn't know why he was blushing.
He just suddenly thought of the inexplicable sentence circulated on the earth back then—but now he can be considered to know what the so-called 'sound that impregnates the ear' is.
He covered his ears with a red face, and met the major general's gaze as soon as he raised his eyes.
Major General Troll still maintained the posture of hugging him, and he was completely awake by looking at his expression. At this moment, a pair of red phoenix eyes were looking at him deeply.
Mute violently broke away from the hands that were encircling him, sat up, and shrank back, but just shrank, his back was against the wall.
The major general didn't force him either, he let go of his grip as soon as he struggled, and sat up too.
"What are you doing here?"
"sleep."
"..."
Choked by the major general's completely irrefutable answer, Mutt took a deep breath, adjusted his breathing and continued.
"I made it clear yesterday."
"Um."
The major general who sat up gave a faint hum, his expression cold and clear, showing no expression.
The young man pursed his lips, made up his mind, and continued.
"As I said, I don't like you..."
With a bang, a hard bang.
That hand brushed Mutt's cheek abruptly, and slammed heavily on the wall behind Mutt, smashing back the remaining half of his sentence.
"That's your business."
Major General Troll, who was half-kneeling on the bed, stared at Mutt and said.
He slammed one hand on the wall next to Mute, deep in the dark blue pupils, burning like an extremely bright flame.
He says,
"Whom I want to sleep with is my business."
The young man who was choked up by His Excellency the Major General's words and completely unable to turn around just watched the Major General get up and get out of bed, and left here.
He opened his mouth slightly, and the whole person was already in a daze.
Major General, look at how powerful your aloof and male god's personality is - how many people want this personality and can't get it!
Is it really okay for you to throw it away so easily and don't change it into a young domineering president? !