The night I returned from Beijing, I tossed and turned in bed, thinking back to all the things that had happened since I met Li Shuming. I was filled with emotion and didn't fall asleep until two o'clock in the morning. When I woke up in the middle of the night, I found myself crying. I really didn't know whether I was sad or afraid of something.
He has never waited for me on a rainy night, nor hugged and kissed me in the wind, nor has he ever tried to shed tears for me.
So, I began to look forward to his coming, looking forward to seeing him rush over to Beijing after seeing the note I left, chasing after me to give me an explanation, I longed to see Li Shuming sleepless and exhausted... .
I know that deep down in my heart I hope to hear his explanation, but when a man touches his chest and repents, swears to the sky to prove that his feelings for her are deeper than anything else, it may give a woman an incomparable sense of accomplishment, especially when he is a gentle and calm man who is not surprised by anything.
The next day was a cloudy day, with a damp and cold wind that almost blew into my bones. I woke up late and had a few mouthfuls of noodles for lunch. I kept my phone turned off. If he really wanted to, he could just come over!
I fell asleep on the sofa in the afternoon. I heard someone ringing the doorbell while I was half asleep. I ran to answer the door and saw Xu Nanfang, who was covered tightly with scarf and gloves. His walking stick was missing. Nanfang was taking off his black leather gloves and breathing heavily on his palms. I quickly opened the door and asked him to come in, only to find that there was someone following him.
"Hey! Big brother, please bring the things in!" Nan Fang turned to the man in the blue cotton jacket and said with a smile.
There are quite a lot of things in big and small bags.
I took out cotton slippers for Nanfang, but he frowned slightly and said nothing. I took out a pair of brown plush home shoes with a bear head on the heels from the shoe cabinet and placed them in front of the sofa.
He grinned, with his two little fangs still there, just like he did back then, "This bear head is good!" Then he sat down and started to change his shoes.
I noticed that his white jeans covered his shoes tightly. I deliberately didn't look at him, but turned to the side and looked into the pockets of all sizes. "What did you pack?"
"Didn't you have dinner?"
I looked at the clock on the wall. It was already six o'clock. If Li Shuming had returned to Beijing today as planned, he would have been home by now! If I turned on my phone at this time, there should be a lot of short messages explaining it!
I was staring at the clock on the wall in a daze. Nan Fang stretched out his hand and waved it in front of me. "Are you daydreaming?"
Then I remembered what he asked, "Oh, I didn't eat."
"I knew it! Look, I brought everything with me. I don't have to go out anymore."
I opened the bag and found that he had packed a lot of cooked food, as well as some fresh vegetables and fish.
I let out a deep sigh, "Not in the mood for it."
Nan Fang chuckled, rolled up his sleeves, held my shoulders, and raised his eyebrows, "I'll do it! It won't be too late to settle the anger with him after I'm full!"
My mouth opened wide. I never thought that Xu Nanfang, who came from a wealthy family, could actually cook, especially since he had difficulty moving.
"During the two years I was doing rehabilitation treatment in the United States, I rented an apartment and my mother stayed there with me. We hired an aunt from the mainland to cook and do housework. Later, my mother returned to Taipei and I went to school there and slowly learned to take care of myself. The aunt had to go back to China for family matters, so we didn't hire anyone else." Nan Fang said as he took out the things he had brought one by one and placed them on the table.
I felt compassion and suddenly felt sad.
I saw that he brought several snacks, all of which were my favorites. He said that he bought them specially at the delicious street in the afternoon. Nanfang insisted on cooking a sumptuous dinner for me. It was said that he could make the best pan-fried silver cod. I wanted to stop him. After all, it was not very nice to let a grown man like him cook these in my house. But seeing his persistent look, I couldn't say anything, for fear that he would think too much. I tied a plaid apron on Nanfang, and he turned around and smiled at me. At that moment, I really couldn't believe my eyes.
Over the years, we have strayed too far away from each other's lives. Before this, my impression of Xu Nanfang was still that of the outstanding boy I met in my youth who had never lived a quiet and stable life. As for the misfortunes he had encountered and the hardships of his life during that period, I knew nothing about it.
The kitchen was very spacious. I leaned against the door and watched Nanfang busying around. I passed things to him from time to time and asked him if he was tired of standing. He shook his head and complained that I underestimated him.
"When will he come back?" Nan Fang said calmly, with his back to me.
"A few days ago, he said he would arrive today."
"I guess you've already got home. I couldn't get through to you on the phone, and then I realized there was a fire in the backyard." He didn't mention his name, but he didn't forget to tease him.
I didn't answer. A layer of white mist filled the glass door of the kitchen, and I stretched out my fingers to draw a butterfly on it.
"Will you accept it?" His voice suddenly slowed down and the movements of his hands stopped.
"What?"
"That child..."
"Nan Fang, please don't ask me. My mind is too confused to think clearly."
He suddenly turned around, looked into my eyes, was silent for a long time, moved his lips, and said carefully, "Oh... Qinqin, I didn't mean it, I really didn't."
"You did it on purpose!" I didn't turn my head away, but reached out to wipe off the mist on the glass door, and unexpectedly touched a little bit of oil.
The kitchen fell into an eerie silence. Looking out the window, the lights on the other side of the river were just beginning to come on.
The doorbell rang, breaking the silence. I hurriedly turned on the faucet to wash my hands, and shouted in the direction of the door, "Who is this?"
No one answered, and the doorbell rang three more times.
he?!
I didn't have time to turn off the faucet, and hurried out, water still dripping from my hands. I stopped by the door, my heart pounding, and looked through the peephole. It was indeed him! I calmed myself down, mustered up the courage to open the door, and Li Shuming, wearing a silver-gray long windbreaker, stood outside the door, looking dusty, his hair a little wet, and a little mud on his leather shoes.
I tried my best to calm myself down and not care about it. I must not let him see through my mind - I was so eager for him to come and listen to his explanation. "Is it you?"
"Of course, shouldn't it appear?" He curled the corners of his mouth and smiled calmly.
At this time, you are still holding on like this! I started to get angry.
"You don't want me to come in?"
Xu Nanfang was there, and I suddenly felt a little panicked, not knowing whether I should let him in. "Mr. Li Shuming, do you still think you are a popular person today? Ha!"
"Auntie isn't home either?"
I leaned against the door and rolled my eyes at him. "Unfortunately, your Aunt Jiang is away on a business trip."
"Why don't we sit down and talk, and I'll explain it to you slowly."
What I hate most is that Li Shuming is always gentle and calm, and always treats me in a gentle and soft voice. This used to be what attracted me deeply, but now it makes me deeply disgusted. Not only is it hypocritical, but it also seems to tell me that he doesn't take me that seriously. He only doesn't bother to control his anger and care about things that he doesn't care about, and he is tolerant of everything. Have you ever seen a tolerant and well-mannered adult get angry with a little kid who offended him
"People are often easily deceived by their eyes and ears—"
Suddenly, there was a dull thud from the kitchen, the sound of a blunt object hitting the ground. My heart skipped a beat and I rushed back in a hurry. Nan Fang was getting up from the ground with a frown on his face and gritted his teeth. There was water on the floor, probably because he slipped.
Without time to think about anything else, I ran over to hold his arm and helped him stand up slowly.
"Did you hit your leg?"
Nan Fang shook his head.
Fortunately, fortunately, this time was not as scary as last time, the trouser legs were still fine, not protruding, I helped him sit on the sofa in the living room, and then I saw Li Shuming standing upright at the door looking at us, his face was livid, his eyes were panic-stricken and I had never seen him before, as if he was sighing, Qinqin, you really disappoint me, or maybe, we both disappoint each other like that... .
At that time, I understood Li Shuming's fatal weakness. He was probably most afraid of being betrayed and could not tolerate a woman cheating on him! Somehow, a sense of relief flashed through my heart. Although Nan Fang just happened to be here, we didn't have anything to do with it.
"Let's go upstairs and talk?" I walked over to him and asked in a low voice.
He looked distressed and waved his hands, "No, that's not necessary, Qinqin. There's probably nothing to explain between us."
Li Shuming turned around quickly, and his panicked figure soon disappeared in the elevator.
Should I chase him? No, he was the one who made the mistake first! He is the one who needs to explain!
But as soon as I turned around, I started crying silently, and I didn’t know why.
"I think he misunderstood." Nan Fang said softly.
"No, he is the one who needs to explain!" I clenched my fingers unconsciously.
"It seems to be raining outside, and it's getting heavier." Nan Fang said thoughtfully.
It's raining in my heart!
… .
In the evening, my father and mother came home. My mother asked me why I came back so early. I told them that Li Shuming and Wang Biyun had a daughter of four or five years old. I told them everything about the meeting that day, and they had a big fight. My father pointed at my mother's nose and scolded her sternly, "You chose it!"
My mother sat in a corner of the sofa, with her head down and not answering. She was probably even more sad and aggrieved than I was.
"Why aren't you talking? Look at the rich son-in-law you chose!" Ever since they got back together, my father has been humble at home for many days. At this time, he probably found a chance to vent.
The mother's eyes were red. "How should I know? You have seen this so many times..."
"you!"
… …
My mind was in a mess, and I hurriedly fled from this *smelly scene, went upstairs and hid in my room in a daze...
Xu Nanfang returned to Taiwan two days later and called to apologize before leaving. The whole thing was so coincidental that he probably couldn't be blamed!
I didn't take the initiative to contact Li Shuming, and he didn't call or message me. I think we probably need some time to cool down.
My mood is like a winter day in the mountain city, damp, cold, and like a long-lasting wound that cannot be healed. The inflammatory reaction is persistent and slow, and the longer it is delayed, the less likely it is to heal.
The wedding date is approaching, and the mother contacted the relatives and friends who received the invitations one by one, telling them that the wedding was postponed. Perhaps this reason is more acceptable.
Half a month later, one day, I took a nap on the back of a chair during the lunch break. Qiu Fang suddenly came close to me and touched my arm, and asked me mysteriously, "Ahem, there are changes at the top, you must know about it, right?"
"What?" I looked at him with wide eyes.
"Don't keep it a secret. I'm counting on getting some information from you!"
"No, I have no idea what you are talking about."
Qiufang shook her head in confusion and left.
Now, all the sleepiness has gone. Although Qiufang's gossip is gossipy, it is not groundless. I wonder what changes she is talking about? I was nervous for the whole afternoon, and my heart was in a mess. The names of Li Shuming and Wang Biyun kept lingering in my mind. Are they enemies or relatives? At that time, I was too impulsive and didn't give him a chance to talk properly. When I wanted to listen, he didn't bother to explain to me.
I asked myself again and again, if Nan Fang wasn't there that day and he had talked to me properly, would I really forgive him? Why did my heart hurt so much? Did I really care about this person enough to tolerate all his past
As I thought about it, I couldn't help but cry with sadness.
Feeling very depressed, I hung up the phone with Zhang Yaoyao and made an appointment to go out to Suhe in the evening. I hadn't been there for a long time.
I grabbed my bag and rushed out after get off work. When I was about to enter the elevator, I remembered that the drawer was not locked. I went back to the office and the phone on the desk was ringing. I hesitated for a long time before picking up the receiver. At that moment, I was really afraid that it was him, but I was also anxiously hoping that it was him.
"Hello!"
"Quilt."
It's really him! (To be continued)