Whenever he thinks of his difficult past, Bai Li will be very angry. Probably since he was born, he has no fate with the word "satisfactory".
Difficulty, for most people, is just one of countless ways of living. Generally speaking, choosing a path that is more difficult than most people in the world means that you will have a life that is more abundant than most people in the world .
However, the forest is big, and there are all kinds of birds, but Bai Li is not one of them. He sometimes feels that even if a pie falls from the sky, one person is smashed on the head, and if it hits him, he must be missed.
Is it possible that some people are not welcomed by God when they are born
No one can sort out the bad debt between him and Shi Wuduan, even Shi Wuduan, who is the most scheming man in the world, can't figure out who is responsible more.
The only thing that is not difficult to say is that, at this point, they are very unfortunate... Both losers.
When Bai Li thinks about it sometimes, he will have the illusion that "Shi Wuyuan" doesn't exist at all, as if everything is his imaginary obsession, even when he hugs this person, he feels the blood vessels on the other person's neck slowly flowing The warmth from the past seems to condense into an unreal feeling.
hate him
Bai Li has never been a saint, if someone hurts him, he wants to get back one point and five points, even at this moment, thinking about this person's various deeds and every word of punishment, there is such a desire to bite him to death.
However, perhaps it is the return of half of his lost blood and soul, although this idea is still there, it is no longer crazy. He finally calmed down, closed his eyes and carefully felt the thin but strong embrace of that man, and recalled the young man's soft and dirty hands many years ago... So Bai Li said to himself, but if you continue to hate, you will never have to to him.
His body and mind seemed to have automatically made the choice for him.
The rebellious heart is a thorn that sticks in the spine of a person, making it straight all the way, with a certain invincible power, and can make a career, because when a person desires something, it is like drowning. When a man's thirst for air is the same, he becomes unbelievably powerful.
But for a lifetime, relying on this, it is impossible to live.
Life is like water, too hard to break easily. There are always some people and some things that have to compromise. There is always a moment, for some things, no matter how angry people are, they have to stop, calm down for a while, put away the thorns in their bodies, forgive others once, and forgive others. Forgive yourself once.
Only at this time, will I discover that one of the culprits who pushed me into a desperate situation is my own heart.
Shi Wudu's hands slowly moved over Bai Li's hair that was attached to his back. They flowed slowly between his fingers like water, and his heart softened amid the tingling pain, like a frozen person Like walking into a warm room, you have to slowly endure the long-term itching and pain, and rub hard to re-circulate the stagnant blood.
After an unknown amount of time, he sighed in a low voice, and whispered in Bai Li's ear, "... I was wrong."
Bai Li responded in a low voice: "En."
The stars isolated on both sides by Changtian walked through the boundless Milky Way, chasing time for tens of thousands of years, and finally reached the end. At that moment, due to exhaustion, there was a certain emptiness in the heart, and all the intense emotions were surging. It is stagnant like stagnant water, but if you look carefully, you can find a small river channel, and the water flow condenses into a small stream, which moistens things and flows out silently.
Shi Wuduan let him go gently, and asked in a low voice: "Are you still planning to go back to Pingyang City?"
The corner of Bai Li's mouth showed bitterness, and he asked back: "Go back... Pingyang City? When did it become my home?"
Shi Wuduan turned around, sat down on the chair where Li Siniang and others had sat just now, and said, "Zou Yanlai is dead."
"I know." Bai Li said after a while, "Gudu disappeared. It was a contract between me and the Tantric Sect. The contract was made by Zou Yanlai. It disappeared. The person at the other end is probably dead."
Shi Wuduan seemed to think of something, and fell silent.
Bai Li was suddenly impulsive, and asked: "Back then, the Esoteric School used the Esoteric Law to release me from the Sect of Ten Thousand Demons, seal the three realms, and completely destroy the Cangyun Valley, but I was tied to the fate of the country because of karma Together, with the seven mountain lanterns."
Shi Wuduan's heart skipped a beat, and he raised his head to look at Bai Li.
Because of his year-round suppression of emotions and anger, he has developed a certain habit. Even if he doesn't want to hide it, the expression on his face is a few beats slower than what he thinks in his heart. In order not to appear inappropriate, he simply does everything Don't put it on the face, the handsome facial features always show some kind of hollow and deep.
…
Even though he didn't want to look at Bai Li so emptyly at this moment, but he was like a savage who hadn't spoken human words for many years, and couldn't keep up with the speed of normal people's speaking - he couldn't figure out whether he should laugh or not at this moment. frown.
Bai Li closed his eyes, and finally said the huge rift between the two of them: "When the time comes, will you kill me too?"
Like Qingchu from Jiulu Mountain, like Master Kuruo from Xuanzong... Do you want to kill me too
Before Shi Wuduan could answer, Bai Li gave a low laugh and said, "If that's the case, just say it, I already... don't want to fight with you anymore."
He showed a little tiredness: "I think enough is enough."
"I didn't intend to kill you." Shi Wuduan said suddenly, his eyes fell on the cold teacup, and after a while, a little belated and imperceptible smile appeared on his face, "Probably I used to think that way sometimes, but... I don't want to kill anymore, especially I don't want to... "
He blinked quickly, the long and thick eyelashes seemed to flirt in Bai Li's heart. Only Shi Wuyuan whispered: "I have been thinking of a way, if..."
He raised his head, and his voice stopped urgently again. Luckily, Bai Li is not Meng Zhongyong. Even if Shi Wudu's words are about to break into 180 petals, he will wait patiently—even if he has waited too long. Long.
"If everything is over, are you still willing to go with me?" After Bai Li waited for his words, Shi Wuduan said it in a strange tone, uttering each word clearly, However, there was a faint tremor at the end of the sound, and that familiar tremor suddenly made Bai Li feel that the person sitting not far away was actually the same as himself.
Shi Wuduan continued: "Maybe you won't be able to come back, maybe you won't be able to see other people anymore, and end your life in a far away place, are you willing?"
Bai Li looked at him with a strange gaze. This time, Shi Wuduan finally didn't dodge any more. He calmly leveled his eyes and looked at him. Bai Li laughed, his amazingly good-looking eyebrows revealed A little presumptuous light asked, "Are you asking me? Why do you want to see other people? You and I have suffered all these years. Isn't it all because of 'others'? Why am I not reconciled?"
"What if your power to reach the sky is gone?" Shi Wudu continued to ask.
This was Bai Li's Achilles' heel, because strength was what he used to rely on for survival, what he pursued so hard, what he once parted ways with Shi Wuyuan, and even gouged out his own flesh and blood with his own hands, but he thought for a while , shook his head, and said: "That's nothing... In fact, I later felt that it was nothing."
This is how a person grows up. He is ignorant at first, and then one day, he is wounded by wind, frost and sword in the world, and begins to understand the seven emotions and six desires. He gave up a lot of things, and then one day, when he stood at the position he once looked up to and got the things he was once elusive, he found that those things were nothing special.
It's the same if you have it, it's the same if you don't have it, even if you don't have it... maybe you will be happier.
This is the whole journey of a life as small as duckweed in the vast world. A person must walk such a road, if he never picks it up, he will never let it go, some things, only those who have got them can say "it's nothing".
Shi Wuduan looked at him, tears suddenly appeared in his somewhat empty eyes, like a little wet water grass exposed on the dry river bed all year round, he seemed to be imitating a certain childish tone on purpose, which made his voice sound There was something weird, and he said gently and slowly: "Okay, then you will be my daughter-in-law!"
It was more than 20 years ago, a little fox who escaped from the catastrophe broke into the cave, and got the protection of the stupid boy at that time. He took out a handkerchief to wipe the water from his hair, and then the little fox expressed his thanks clumsily but earnestly, saying, "I will repay you."
But the young man replied indifferently: "Okay, then you can be my daughter-in-law."
The Cuiping bird suddenly flew up and landed on Baili's shoulder. Its wide wings brought a gust of wind, blowing up Baili's hair, sweeping across the fifty-stringed harp hanging on the wall together with the astrolabe, The melancholy sound of the piano spread like water waves, and when I heard it in my heart, I felt like I wanted to cry a lot.
This feeling can be regarded as a memory, but it was already at a loss.