Just Want to Be His Lover

Chapter 49

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When Gu Yanshu arrived in Suzhou, it was already snowing heavily.

It was also the first time he knew that this gentle city in the south could also have such a heavy snowfall, without thinking, as if trying to destroy something.

Taking out his mobile phone, Shen Jue still has no news.

Tap the name on the screen with your fingertips, tap a few times, and then exit the interface.

Forget it, he should have gotten used to it by now.

Heavy wind and heavy rain have always been just one person's business.

He shouldn't take Shen Jue's connivance and protection to him in just a few days and take it for granted.

Without this reason, Shen would never owe him.

Gu Yanshu tightened his coat, buried his chin in the collar, and the snowflakes fell gently on his eyelashes.

When Gu Yanshu saw Lin Anan, the little girl was sitting outside the emergency room, hugging her knees, her head buried, her thin shoulders shrugged slightly.

He called Ann softly, and the little girl looked up, tears streaming down her face.

She choked up and called brother, then broke down in sobs.

The nurse next to him raised his head and gave Gu Yanshu a sorry look.

Gu Yanshu was very familiar with that kind of look - he had seen this look before his mother's last rescue before she died, and he knew that this look meant bad luck.

He took a deep breath, then walked over to hug Lin Anan, patted her on the back, and said softly, "It's okay."

Those words seemed to be comforting Lin An'an, but also comforting himself.

In fact, my grandfather is already old, and has experienced the pain of bereavement. This time, I am afraid that it will be more or less auspicious, but Gu Yanshu is still unwilling to give up that little hope, because he has too little to lose. So little that he wanted to grab all he could.

However, he didn't know what he could do, so he could only pray silently in his heart, lonely and helpless. After the warm sound coaxed Lin Anan to sleep, she sat alone in the corridor outside the emergency room, propped her arms, bowed her back, and buried her head in her palms.

In fact, he was already very tired, but he didn't dare to fall asleep, because he was afraid that if he closed his eyes or opened them, he would lose another one of the few people he cherished and cared about.

The time was long and silent, the night outside the window had arrived, and it became thicker and darker under the wind and snow. Gu Yanshu's fingertips and limbs were frozen stiff, and there was a faint pain in his knee.

The door of the emergency room opened suddenly, and Gu Yanshu stood up abruptly.

The doctor was a little tired, sighed, paused, and then said slowly with a secret helplessness: "We will try our best."

Gu Yanshu's fingers hanging on the side of his legs curled up slightly, his lips parted slightly, and he froze for a long time before he said lightly: "Well, thank you doctor."

It seemed that extreme fear and pain together with the freezing air had numb him.

I don't know if it hurts or it hurts too much.

He tried to sit down slowly leaning against the wall, but before he could relieve himself, the phone rang.

As if sensing a savior, Gu Yanshu picked it up quickly, and when he saw the word "Fangyuan" on the screen, his eyes dimmed slightly, and he instantly adjusted to a suitable state to answer the phone.

The voice on the other end of the phone was anxious: "Xiaoshu! Something happened!"

Gu Yanshu's first reaction was that something happened to Shen Jue, and he hurriedly asked, "What's wrong?"

"The group of bastard paparazzi did not know where to take some photos, they must say that you were under the unspoken rules of Mr. Ye! Oh, I can't tell for a while, just look at the link I sent you."

Gu Yanshu clicked on Weibo while listening to Fangyuan's rambling.

#Gu Yanshu Night Meeting Mysterious Man#

#古凯书叶碐behavior intimate#

#Gu Yanshu Aston Martin#

#Aston Martin owner#

All kinds of photos are frantically circulating on the homepage.

For example, when an Aston Martin drove into the underground parking lot of the hotel, the angle of the photo was just right enough to see the profile of Gu Yanshu on the co-pilot through the window.

For example, at the entrance of the Japanese grocery store during the day, Ye Ting helped Gu Yanshu's waist.

Another example is the photos of Ye Qu driving an Aston Martin in and out of various occasions.

The most searched Weibo is even more amazing.

@吃瓜第一线: Big melon today: 1. Gu Yanshu, who was supposed to record a reality show in the villa, was photographed sitting in a luxury car in and out of the hotel parking lot in the middle of the night. It is reported that the limited edition Aston Martin is owned by President Ye of the UN Group . 2. Today the industry just broke the news that Gu Yanshu squeezed out many professional singers and got the ost of Qin Fan's new movie, so it was time for Ye Qu to bring Gu Yanshu and Qin Fan to dinner. 3. Even though he is an artist of the same company, Gu Yanshu not only snatched Chen Ran's "Cohabitation Life" recording quota, but also caused Chen Ran to be terminated from the contract. 4. Ye Ting once publicly stated that her sexual orientation is male. After all, what is the relationship between the two

[No, no, isn't it the first time Gu Yanshu has been unspoken, is there anyone who doesn't know about it?]

[Is there any evidence upstairs and you just talk nonsense?]

[Otherwise, how do you think YOUNG was disbanded back then? And this time the hammer is solid enough, right?]

[At that time, Gu Yanshu's reputation was so bad, everyone thought he was cold, but UN suddenly signed him, and then made various resources popular. Thinking about it, you know there is a problem]

[Besides, Ye Qu had a bad reputation in the United States before. According to his various predecessors, Gu Yanshu is his favorite model]

[But you're not that hungry, are you? Can't wait to pull it out to open a room while you are still recording the show?]

[I didn’t try my best to please the sponsor last night, how could I get the resources of OST today? Don’t you think so?”

[Ouch, she usually pretends to be pure and clean, but she turns out to be a butt seller]

[It’s really shameless to pull Shen Jue out to fire CP like this, and I don’t know how many shots he blocked by pulling Shen Jue out]

[Don't cue Shen Jue, Shen Jue is filming with the beautiful woman Zhao in Xi'an, they are a perfect match, some people don't post it upside down]

[That's right, it's strange that someone from Shen Jue's family can admire Gu Yanshu]

Most people in this world are only willing to see what they want to see, believe what they want to believe, and are not afraid to speculate on everything with the greatest malice and firmly believe that this is the truth, and then use the truth they imagined as evidence to abuse and accuse with confidence , and anyone who doesn't believe their fabricated facts is considered a fool without a brain.

They don't believe in explanations, nor do they believe in facts that are different from their imaginations. They think that they stand on the moral high ground and criticize everything, as if this will allow them to find a kind of superiority and satisfaction in their incompetent and embarrassing lives.

So they are always right, because even though their self-righteous faces are so ugly and funny, they can successfully hurt those who have been misunderstood, slandered and spread rumors, and at the end they can say lightly, he is a star, he deserves it .

There can never be a reason for such a person.

And for those who have been slandered and spread rumors, those injuries will never be erased, just like a little black ink dripping on white paper, only a little bit, but it can't be wiped off no matter how you wipe it off.

This kind of ink, Gu Yanshu was splashed once before. That time, he spent five years of separation from the person he liked and finally wiped off most of it. Before he had time to slow down, he was splashed on again.

Malicious speculation, dirty language, inexplicable slander.

The emotion in Gu Yanshu's heart at that moment was neither anger nor grievance, but powerlessness.

He suddenly felt too tired. Every unintentional act was magnified and distorted. Life was too tiring. Even if he tried so hard to prove himself, in the end it was nothing compared to a few endless photos, or even Even the love he had kept in his heart for seven years was interpreted in such a nasty way.

Inside the door are relatives on the verge of life and death.

Outside the door is slander that confuses right and wrong.

At that moment, Gu Yanshu felt that he had returned to five years ago.

And five years ago at this time, he thought with satisfaction that he still had Shen Jue to rely on, and Shen Jue at that time did try his best to protect him.

But now, with five years of separation and just a few days of ambiguity, the unreachable mobile phone and the ambiguity between Shen Jue and the young lady of the Zhao family in just a few words, Gu Yanshu didn't know what position he had to rely on Shen Jue, nor did he know Do I still have the courage to rely on Shen Jue again

Gu Yanshu's knuckles holding the phone turned white.

Fangyuan seemed to be saying something in the earphones all the time, as if he was very anxious and urgent, but Gu Yanshu didn't listen to a word.

It wasn't until Fang Yuan asked "What's going on with Shen Jue", that Gu Yanshu came back to his senses, and said calmly, "What's going on."

Fang Yuan was in a hurry: "What's the matter? Doesn't Shen definitely like you? Then what's the matter with him and Zhao Shan?"

Does Shen Jue like him

Before Gu Yanshu could give his answer, he saw the photo sent by Fang Yuan.

In the heavy snow in the ancient city of Xi'an, Shen Jue was leaning against the wall, while Zhao Shan was standing in front of him holding an umbrella and looking at him with a smile.

The family is right, the male is talented and the female is beautiful, it is true and correct.

For no reason, Gu Yanshu's heart suddenly throbbed in pain, so painful that he had to stretch out his hands to cover it, as if this could relieve the sore and breathless pain, but the facts told him that it was useless, all the backlog His uneasiness and grievance were exposed at this moment, and he couldn't hide it.

He doesn't really care that much, he doesn't think Shen Jue owes him, but he wants Shen Jue to be there, wants Shen Jue to answer the phone, wants Shen Jue to comfort him, wants Shen Jue to come out and tell everyone that he was with him last night It's him, not Ye Qing.

But he was very sensible since he was a child, so he just thought about it.

He breathed out silently, his fingers clenched the clothes on his chest and twisted out the deep folds, and then replied calmly: "I don't know about Shen Jue, please contact Mr. Ye to refute the rumors first."

Ye Que had notified the legal department immediately to issue a warning letter from a lawyer to clarify and refute rumors, and was further investigating the identity of the rumor maker. Qin Fan also came out to clarify the situation at that time, and together with the music director at the time, he issued a statement Gu Yanshu's dry voice in the audition at that time.

The tough attitude of dispelling the rumors, the swift and resolute methods, and the dry voice that burst out gave the fans confidence - Gu Yanshu was able to get this resource because he sang well.

However, some people will always think that those who believe in refuting rumors are fools, and those who believe in filth are the truth.

And one question never got answered.

— If the person who was with Gu Yanshu last night wasn't Ye Qi, who would it be? Why did he drive Ye Qu's car? And why did Gu Yanshu go out with him during the recording of the show

Not only the masses of melon eaters, but even Fang Yuan felt curious: "Is it Shen Jue? Was it Shen Jue who was with you last night?"

Gu Yanshu did not deny it.

Fang Yuan was in a hurry: "If it's Shen Jue, then find him quickly! Come out and refute the rumors! You two are so sticky like that, everyone can see it, do you still care about avoiding this suspicion?"

As soon as Fang Yuan finished speaking, a call from the program team also came in, and they simply started a group chat.

Cao Dan went straight to the topic: "Xiao Shu, have you contacted Shen Jue yet?"

"No." Gu Yanshu replied very lightly.

Cao Dan on the other end of the phone seemed to be irritatingly scratching his hair, and then yelled at the people beside him: "Contact the crew in Xi'an, we must find Shen Jue immediately to refute the rumors."

After finishing speaking, he turned his head and said to Gu Yanshu: "You can post a Weibo to explain first, so as not to cause more trouble."

Gu Yanshu was very calm: "You all knew that Shen Jue and I went out last night?"

"..." Cao Dan, who had been bribed by Shen Jue long ago, paused in embarrassment, "Then what... that... um..."

Yes, otherwise how could it be so smooth.

Thinking of this, Gu Yanshu thought of the photo of Shen Jue and Zhao Shan he saw just now, his heart twitched, and he lowered his eyelashes and said calmly: "Let's wait for Shen Jue's attitude first. After all, this matter may bring him some troubles." Bad influence, not very convenient."

"Hey, my brother, when is it time to wait for Shen Jue's attitude? As long as you don't mind, what kind of attitude can he have? He can jump up and set off firecrackers for ninety-nine and eighty-one days. He has liked you for seven years, and he rushed to participate in this show just to please you, so you can tell him what inconvenience he can have..."

Fangyuan: "..."

Gu Yanshu: "..."

Cao Dan: "..."

The air suddenly fell into a strange dead silence.

After realizing that he slipped the tongue in a hurry, Cao Dan just wanted to make up for it when he heard Gu Yanshu's usually calm and steady voice trembling slightly: "What did you just say?"

"I said... well, forget it, you can see for yourself."

When a person like Gu Yanshu's voice trembles, what is he thinking in his heart, the onlookers can understand it with just a glance.

Obviously it was just two consensual people wanting to talk about a relationship, just because these messy things made it so complicated, Cao Dan was inexplicably anxious when he saw it, and simply didn't bother to care about agreeing to Shen Jue What, directly sent the video of the preparation to Gu Yanshu.

While Gu Yanshu looked at the icon of that video, his fingertips froze in the air, and he hesitated to click on it.

Things that have been longed for for too long, and things that have been struggling for too long, are suddenly presented to the eyes, like an oasis that a traveler who has trekked in the desert suddenly sees, and always worries that it is a mirage. It broke.

However, after all, I was still too eager, so even though I was worried that it was a dream, I still clicked in with a thousandth of hope.

Then he saw Shen Jue and said, I have liked him for seven years.

It's been seven years, it turns out that Shen Jue has liked him for seven years.

Gu Yanshu clutched the phone tightly, sat on the ground, buried his head in his knees.

I don't know why, but at that moment he wanted to cry so much.

He didn't cry when he was scolded, he didn't cry when he was misunderstood, he didn't cry when he was slandered, but when he heard Shen Jue say he liked him, he suddenly wanted to cry so much.

It turned out that Shen Jue really liked him.

Shen Jue likes him.

How nice.

That Shen Jue who would kill him, take care of him, protect him, coax him, and spoil him turned out to really like him.

Just like he likes Shen Jue.

Seven years.

The snow fell noiselessly outside the window, and Gu Yanshu sat quietly, as if he was thinking about something and lost his mind.

After an unknown amount of time, the phone suddenly started to vibrate desperately, and Gu Yanshu came back to his senses. When he clicked on it, it was a message from Shen Jue.

[I lost my phone at the airport and I just found it]

[Don't worry, it's okay, I'll clarify right away, don't be afraid]

[I have nothing to do with Zhao Shan, I told her that I like you, and she said that she would treat you to dinner later]

[Where are you now? I'll come to you right away? I'm sorry, I didn't mean not to answer]

[Okay, everything will be fine]

[It's snowing heavily today, do you wear thicker clothes?]

Seeing every word, Gu Yanshu's eyes became sore.

Before he could reply, the door of the emergency room was pushed open. Gu Yanshu turned his head suddenly. The doctor took off his mask and let out a long sigh of relief: "The patient is out of danger."

pat—

A tear fell on the screen.

It turned out that fate treated him with so much kindness.

Gu Yanshu took a deep breath, then took out his mobile phone, and dialed the number he knew so well.

He said, "Shen Jue."

A low and gentle voice came from the other end of the phone: "Well, what's the matter."

Gu Yanshu felt that his throat was a little dry, and he whispered: "It's nothing, I just miss you a little."

He spoke very softly, very lightly, and inadvertently moved more than a thousand kilometers of time and space, silently and out of control.

Shen Jue's knuckles holding the phone were already a little white, but his voice still maintained a steady and reliable gentleness. He whispered: "Sleep if you miss me, and you'll see each other after you sleep."

"okay."

All the flights from Xi'an have been grounded, he has no way to see Shen Jue immediately, so he should sleep and wait a little longer.

When grandpa recovers from his illness, when the program is finished, when all the disputes are over, he must pick a sunny day, put on the best formal clothes, and bring a bouquet of roses to tell Shen He decided, he liked him too, for seven years.

For seven whole years, even though they hadn't met, talked, had no future and hope during such a long period of time, he still liked him all the time.

After deciding all these things, sleepiness and exhaustion hit me, as if those things that had been accumulated in my heart for many years faded away in an instant, and I was satisfied and relaxed.

Gu Yanshu thought, let's take a nap, maybe I can still see Shen Jue in my dream when I fall asleep.

Thinking about it, he had a dream.

In the dream, he seemed to be experiencing life and death all his life.

From a very young age, my mother hugged him and hid in a small room, telling him to lock the door of the room when he was alone at home, otherwise that drunk man might kill him for no reason at any time. Get up from the bed and beat him up.

At that time, he thought, it really hurts when he was beaten, and it would be fine if he didn't have a father.

Later, he really lost his father, and he realized that he would be very sad, because the tall man who would lift him up when he was awake and take him to the amusement park would never come back again. And no one can lift him up high and tell him that he should be a man of indomitable spirit.

So he knew at the age of seven that he was going to be a grown-up.

At that time, his mother and grandfather were busy with work, taking Lin Anan with him, so when the other children were picked up by adults, he had already learned to walk alone through the narrow, long and unlit alley in order to save two yuan for the bus fare. , He is actually afraid of the dark, but he can't tell others that he is afraid of the dark, until one day when he protected himself from a pervert with the pencil sharpener he carried, he just hugged his mother and said, it's okay, he's not afraid.

Afterwards he kept saying, it's okay, he's not afraid.

His mother is seriously ill, but he is not afraid. He can go to school, work hard, and take good care of his sister. He can sell his favorite piano, and he can wear doll clothes for a whole day in the 39-degree heat.

He came to the north from the south alone, gave up his studies, signed an unequal treaty with a brokerage company, and practiced dancing with his leg injury in the cold winter of the north until he was about to lose consciousness and fell into a coma for three days and three nights. Not afraid.

Because he has to work harder than anyone else to protect everything he wants to protect.

He felt that most of his life would pass like this, and he didn't know that he could be feared until he met Shen Jue.

You can be afraid of the cold, because Shen Jue will tuck him into his own bed and cover him warmly.

You can be afraid of pain, because Shen Jue will coax him patiently and protect him, preventing him from getting hurt.

You can be afraid of hardships, because Shen Jue will learn sweet and sour southern dishes in order to make him fat.

You can also be afraid of the dark, because no matter how late you practice dancing, Shen Jue will always come to pick him up and go home.

But later, the rumors and gossip were terrifying, and Shen Jue left him.

Later, he was helpless in life, old age, sickness and death, and his mother left him.

He seemed to have walked into a boundless snowstorm, not knowing where he came from or where he was going back.

Then suddenly someone called him, Gu Yanshu.

He suddenly woke up from his dream, only to realize that the sky had turned from early morning to late night, and there was no one in the corridor with pale lights.

He sat up, rubbed his eyelids with his fingertips, took a deep breath, and saw the phone beside him turned on.

The word Shen Jue flashed on the screen.

After picking it up, Shen Jue's voice came from the other end of the phone: "Which ward?"

Gu Yanshu was slightly startled: "Which ward?"

The voice on the other end of the phone was rambling: "I'm at the gate of the hospital, I don't know where to find you."

Shen Jue spoke calmly, but Gu Yanshu didn't react in a daze: "Aren't all the flights in Xi'an grounded?"

"Well. I drove here for more than ten hours, and almost got into an accident on the road, so you really don't consider coming to pick me up?" Shen Jue seemed to be pretending to be relaxed, and Shen Jue's tone contained some unscrupulous tiredness. lazy.

Gu Yanshu turned his head and looked out the window.

It was the same vast night as in his dream, filled with wind and snow.

It's just that on the other side of the wind and snow, there is a beam of warm yellow light. In the light, the man leans on the car body, raises his eyebrows, looks in his direction, and smiles softly and recklessly.

It seemed that he was supposed to be there in the first place, giving Gu Yanshu a stable hope in this turbulent life.

Gu Yanshu suddenly didn't want to wait any longer.

Anyway, he and Shen Jue have always been very difficult, there are too many involuntary things between them, too many rumors hindering, too many endless disputes, so when Shen Jue crossed the 1,300-kilometer wind When Blizzard walked in front of him, he suddenly didn't want to wait any longer.

He wants to be with Shen Jue, right now.

Just like he once asked Shen Jue if he had read Liang Shiqiu's essay.

You go, I will not send you, you come, no matter how windy or rainy, I will pick you up.

He is going to pick up Shen Jue.

For once in his life, he wanted to be really self-willed, not caring about those secular rules, not caring about whether others agreed, he just wanted to be with Shen Jue, decently, openly and aboveboard.

He hung up the phone, held an umbrella, and walked towards Shen Jue step by step.

He said: "Shen Jue, I heard that you have liked me for seven years."

"Coincidentally, me too."