Hae-il was completely unconscious and asked, "Who lied?"
Sheng Canyang opened his mouth to speak, as if he really wanted to tell him, Hai Ri quickly stretched out his hand and said, "Wait a minute!"
Hai Ri said, "I'll guess it myself."
Sheng Canyang said, "Then you guess."
Then he was replying to WeChat again, Hai Ri moved closer and saw Sheng Canyang being scolded.
Hai Ri: "..."
On the opposite side is the head portrait of a man, who seems to be in his thirties, and uses his own formal attire photo as the head portrait. It looked like a leader who was questioning Sheng Canyang: "Do you have any sense of responsibility?"
If the superior scolded the subordinate, it would have been a serious wording, Sheng Canyang replied: "Yeah."
Hai Ri: "..."
Superior: "What attitude?"
Sheng Canyang replied: "I'm sorry to trouble you, Brother Zhang."
It shows that it is typing. After typing for a long time, it only replied: "Are you okay?"
Hae Il asked, "Are you the leader?"
Sheng Canyang laughed, as if he thought this title was a bit funny. He thought for a while and said, "You can also say that."
Hai Ri didn't know exactly what role Sheng Canyang played among these people, but it was obvious that Sheng Canyang was using such relationships to protect him and implicate himself. Hai Ri said, "Is it a big influence?"
"We are already in this world," Sheng Canyang said, "There is nothing to lose, what impact should we care about?"
Sheng Canyang said, "Brother Hai, just play casually."
Hai Ri: "..."
Hai Ri couldn't attribute Sheng Canyang's attitude towards life to his young age and ignorance. On the contrary, Sheng Canyang is too sensible and understands everything in the world. He can only attribute it to Sheng Canyang's own depression tendency. Sheng Canyang tends to self-destruct, so sometimes he goes to extremes: Anyway, everything will be destroyed sooner or later, why not let me do it myself.
Hai Ri sometimes thinks this way, but after coming to this world, Hai Ri feels much better and never thinks about dying again, and the people around him don't seem to have any obvious mental illness, but Sheng Canyang occasionally suffers from mental illness. There will be such a shadow. Unlike other people who will speak out the dark side of their hearts, Sheng Canyang is very restrained in what he says, but what he does sometimes feels abnormal.
When Hai Ri met Sheng Canyang for the first time, he was also a somewhat indifferent little boy, but during the second mission, Sheng Canyang became much more sunny and cheerful, and even talked to him a lot, but since this afternoon , Sheng Canyang seemed to have returned to the feeling Hai Ri had when he saw Sheng Canyang for the first time. A little indifferent.
Sheng Canyang should have restrained himself, and his performance was very close to usual, but Hai Ri still keenly felt that when he talked to himself and others, he was slightly impatient. It's like forcing yourself.
Hai Ri thought for a while, then suddenly said: "Are you in a bad mood?"
Sheng Canyang: "..."
Hai Ri said cautiously, "Because of me?"
"No," Sheng Canyang sighed, reached out and grabbed Hai Ri's wrist, and shook it vigorously. Hai Ri took a look, but didn't resist. He felt Sheng Canyang's hand trembling slightly. Sheng Canyang said, "Sometimes so."
Sure enough, it's no wonder that today's state is not right. Hai Ri asked, "Has your condition not improved since you came here?"
"It's improved a lot," Sheng Canyang said. "People here don't need to take medicine or see a psychiatrist. I haven't had insomnia for a long time. It's much better."
Hae Il: "But you still have symptoms, don't you?"
Sheng Canyang: "Occasionally. Very occasionally."
Hai Ri understands, it may be because of the confession last night, maybe what Hai Ri said has affected Sheng Canyang's emotions.
Sheng Canyang took a deep breath, then opened his eyes again, let go of Hai Ri's wrist, and said relaxedly: "It's all right now."
"So fast?" Hai Ri said, "Did I do something wrong?"
"No," Sheng Canyang immediately denied, "It has nothing to do with you."
Hai Ri hurriedly apologized, and said, "Sometimes I don't speak too thoughtfully."
Sheng Canyang interrupted: "You are fine, stop talking."
Hai Ri had no choice but to shut up.
Sheng Canyang was silent for a moment, as if hesitating, he hesitated for a long time, and then said: "I don't want you, because of my illness, to be so cautious. I feel suffocated."
Hai Ri: "..."
Hai Ri felt that something was really wrong with Sheng Canyang.
It was just that he felt some of Sheng Canyang's emotions a little keenly just now, but now he obviously felt something was wrong. Because he found that Sheng Canyang became hesitant to speak, and he was trying to make himself more organized and less emotional.
Hai Ri just irritated him again.
Depression patients often have mood swings and it is difficult to control themselves. Before Hai Ri died, he also experienced such a period. His thinking was slow. Sometimes he had to react for a long time when someone said a word, but he did not know how to answer it. But what came faster than these thoughts was emotion, Hai Ri's attitude just now made Sheng Canyang uncomfortable.
Hai Ri said decisively: "Understood, I won't do it next time."
Sheng Canyang said: "It's okay, just let me stay for a while."
"You yourself?" Hai Ri asked tentatively.
Sheng Canyang stood up and said decisively: "Go to sleep and leave me alone."
Then he walked out. Hai Ri looked at his back, dazed.
what is going on actually? Hai Ri thought back over and over again, he didn't even know when Sheng Canyang had such emotions, and he didn't know why.
Is it because he was scolded by the leader
It's also possible, Hai Ri thought, their thinking is like a string that is about to break, ready to break at any time, so tightly stretched that they can't bear even a little bit of strength.
It should be because when Sheng Canyang confessed to him last night, he thought of his illness again. Perhaps this illness is where he feels the most inferior, and his feelings for Hai Ri reminded him of the troubled times. feelings, so aroused some of his emotions. And Hae-il had sharply pierced through his disguise just now, and discovered his abnormality, which made him feel more like a patient.
"Mistake." Hai Ri lay on the bed and said to himself.
He didn't know that Sheng Canyang was so sensitive, he should be more careful when speaking. The key is that most of the time when the two of them get along, Sheng Canyang is like an ordinary boy next door.
Hai Ri didn't know whether he should stay by his side now, so he let out a long sigh.
Before Sheng Canyang committed suicide, Hai Ri had never seen Sheng Canyang lose control of his emotions, but it must have been serious, utter despair. And no one will cherish him, and the people on the Internet will not be careful with him. Even if they are giving charity, they all have condescending faces.
Hai Ri took out Weibo, and uncontrollably searched for the word "Sheng Canyang".
The internal network here has much less verbal criticism of Sheng Canyang. After all, they are people who come here because they have tasted the pain of life. Generally, they will be kind to others. Just released, a little girl posted a picture of Sheng Canyang when she had red hair, and said, "Am I the only one in the world who hasn't met Sheng Canyang?"
The Weibo was posted on Super Topics, and there was a comment below: "I've seen it before, the real person is really handsome."
Hai Ri clicked on Chaochao and signed in. Seeing that there are still many people chatting inside, everyone is dead, and star chasing is more Buddhist, and this has become a place for chatting.
Many people are discussing where to go to meet Sheng Canyang, and many people are sharing the life experience of meeting Sheng Canyang. After a long time, they have saved a lot of pictures that fans have edited well, and then they saw someone asking: "Canyang's death application notice But? Is it true or not?"
There were hundreds of replies below, and the hot comment said: "Really. I haven't given it for more than a year."
Under this reply, many people asked why, and some people questioned the authenticity of the news. The blogger replied: "Let's be honest, I won't pass it to him at all. Haven't you seen it yet? The higher-ups did it on purpose."
After she finished sending this message, she stopped replying, and the rest of the people did not reply after asking. Some people explained to her that it was because Sheng Canyang's despair value was too high. Can depression be saved, and to what extent. If Sheng Canyang is saved, it proves that depression is not unsolvable.
Hai Ri thought, these folk sayings really sound decent.
He actually got annoyed more and more.
If it is said that being a celebrity is like this, every move and every bad thing in life has to be talked about, then it is indeed quite stressful.
Hai Ri thought for a while, got up and walked out, reached the door of Sheng Canyang, took a breath, raised his hand to knock on the door, hesitated again, raised his hand, hesitated again, went back and forth three times, then took out his mobile phone, leaned on the door On the door, a message was posted: "Are you asleep?"
There was no reply for a long time, and Hai Ri felt that maybe he didn't check his phone at all.
When he was depressed, he probably wanted to block the information from the outside world. Hai Ri figured it out, turned around to leave, but the door next to him opened, Tang Ying stared at him in surprise, and said, "Why do you …”
Hai Ri: "...take a walk."
Tang Ying glanced at the corridor: "...walking in the corridor?"
Afraid that Sheng Canyang would hear his voice, Hai Ri said in a low voice, "Talk to Sheng Canyang about something, but he might be asleep, so I didn't go in."
Tang Ying let out an "ah", glanced at the door next door, and said, "Then?"
Hai Ri: "I'm going back."
Tang Ying: "Aren't you going for a walk again?"
Hai Ri: "..."
"It just so happens that I have to go out for a walk," Tang Ying said, "Why don't you go for a walk together?"
Hai Ri was about to speak when the door behind him suddenly opened. Sheng Canyang leaned on the door frame with folded arms and said, "Looking for me?"
"Ah," Hai Ri said, "yes."
Hai Ri: "Excuse me, I'll talk to him."
Tang Ying shrugged indifferently, and said, "Then I have to go alone. You two have a lot to talk about every day."
Sheng Canyang smiled and said, "Stealing your identity."
When he said this, Tang Ying smiled instead, and said, "Take me next time. I'm leaving."
Hai ri couldn't observe Sheng Canyang's state, so he went back with Sheng Canyang, and Sheng Canyang lay on the bed when he entered the room, Hai ri saw him throw his phone on the ground far away.
Hai Ri picked it up for him, the phone was not broken.
Hai Ri entered the room without saying a word, and sat down on the floor next to the bed, playing with his phone while wearing earphones.
Sheng Canyang said, "You don't need to wear headphones."
Hai Ri couldn't hear clearly with headphones on, so he looked back at him and pointed to his ear, indicating that he couldn't hear. Sheng Canyang reached out and pulled off his earphones, and said, "Don't wear them."
Hai Ri let out an "oh" and started to release it to the public. Kuaishou anchor King Kong Barbie is selling goods. Ten packs of Yanji cold noodles for 39.9 yuan, with two bags of spicy cabbage for free.
Hai Ri was moved.
While placing the order, he heard Sheng Canyang say, "I've always wanted to know what you're hearing in your ears."
Hai Ri: "..."
"It was only later that I found out that it was "The Illusion of Love" and "Business of Love." Sheng Canyang added.
Hai Ri laughed.
Hai Ri said: "I've said it many times, don't look down on our street songs, vulgarity is elegance, understand?"
Hai Ri looks like a dog, with a mixed-race appearance, fair skin, and good stature. The half-Russian blood in his body makes his eyebrows stiff, his nose bridge is tall and beautiful, and his pupils are gray-blue. He can attract people's attention by standing there, with white wired earphones in his ears from time to time, watching strangers not enter, handsome and cold. But in fact, no one would have guessed that the reason for wearing headphones is because I watch Kuaishou every day, and I am afraid that the public release will disturb the people.
When Sheng Canyang heard Hai Ri's song for the first time, the shocking feeling was really hard to describe.
At this time, this handsome guy was sitting on the floor, watching the anchor selling goods, and asked, "Do you think they make money by selling so cheaply?"
Sheng Canyang was not too sure and said, "I should be able to earn some money."
Hai Ri: "Then I'll sell the goods too? What do you think?"
"Yes," Sheng Canyang diverted his attention, and actually began to think about the feasibility, saying, "What are you selling?"
Hai Ri: "Show art."
Sheng Canyang laughed.
Hai Ri breathed a sigh of relief, and then heard Sheng Canyang seriously planning, "You can take my heat."
"Try it," Sheng Canyang said, "During the live broadcast, just say 'Sheng Canyang's first live broadcast', and then I will be your assistant behind the scenes. Call your boss and pass you cigarettes."
Hai Ri: "Smoking is not allowed on other platforms."
Sheng Canyang: "That's what it means. Put it aside, you are a performer, and I am the one below to beat the gong to collect money."
Hai Ri: "Hahahahahaha."
Sheng Canyang also laughed.
The two were silent for a moment, the only sound in the air was King Kong Barbie's hard work selling goods, Sheng Canyang listened to the sound and closed his eyes. He has always felt that there is a pool of stagnant water in his heart, which stinks motionlessly in the bottom of his heart. After he walked out of Hai Ri's room, he didn't feel better, but worse. He felt that when Hai Ri was beside him, it seemed that the wind could blow into his heart again, causing slight ripples. When Hai Ri left, he was left alone, and the pool of stagnant water would engulf him again.
He no longer had the symptoms of panic attacks, insomnia, and loss of appetite that he had when he was alive. When reflected in this world, the main symptom is depression and lifelessness.
Sheng Canyang said, "What's the point of living?"
Hai Ri: "..."
Hae-il thought he was fine.
Hai Ri: "You know, I can't give you the answer you want to hear."
Sheng Canyang looked at the ceiling quietly.
Sheng Canyang said: "The most unfair thing in life is that you can't choose your own birth. No one has asked you if you want to come to this world."
Hai Ri: "This may be a question that every patient has thought about."
Sheng Canyang: "Have you thought about it too?"
"Think about it." Hai Ri said, "Actually, I've almost forgotten it. I don't remember the bad process, I can only remember the result."
"I really can't figure out how you came here." Sheng Canyang said, "You don't think about anything."
"I'm sorry," Hai Ri said politely, "I'm just so cheerful."
Sheng Canyang said, "That's why you are so popular."
Hai Ri: "?"
"Everyone likes you," Sheng Canyang said, "Didn't you notice?"
Hai Ri did not notice it, but he felt that after he came here, he seemed to have made friends right away.
Sheng Canyang said: "Isn't my performance on the first day too bad?"
Only then did Hai Ri realize that this was Sheng Canyang's first day chasing him.
Hai Ri smiled helplessly, then looked back at him, Sheng Canyang was also looking at him, his eyes seemed really sad.
"No," Hai Ri said, "how could it be?"
Hai Ri didn't know how to express his inner thoughts, he couldn't joke at this time, but if he really got serious, Hai Ri wouldn't talk anymore.
He missed his mother tongue so much, and wanted to comfort Sheng Canyang with his mother tongue, but Sheng Canyang couldn't understand it either.
Sheng Canyang was thinking about something in silence, his hands drooped by the bed, looking as if they had fallen off. Hae Il held his arm, feeling the reality that he still exists.
Hai Ri asked, "Would you like to talk to me?"
After a while, Sheng Canyang replied: "It's no big deal."
The symptoms did not subside until evening. Depression tends to be severe in the morning and light in the evening. It is more serious in the morning and gets better in the evening. In the afternoon, Sheng Canyang was still in the same state as in the morning, but in the evening, his state became better, and he started to chat with Liu Jie and the others, and it didn't seem like he was pretending to be relaxed, his brows stretched, and his state improved go up.
Hai Ri also slowly relaxed.
In the afternoon, everyone got together to discuss again, but it was still the same things as in the morning, and there was nothing new after asking. Everyone insisted that they were not lying, so naturally it was impossible to find any new tricks. Can only wait for tomorrow.
That would mean another death tonight. Hai Ri felt a little uneasy.
At night, Sheng Canyang went back to the room first, and Hai Ri waited in the living room until everyone had gone back, then tiptoed into Sheng Canyang's room. The door of the room was unlocked, and Sheng Canyang was leaning on the bed and playing with his mobile phone.
Hai Ri: "Don't turn on the lights?"
Sheng Canyang: "If there is a crack in the door, light will leak."
"What are you looking at?" Hai Ri consciously began to change his shoes and look for pajamas, preparing to fall asleep.
Sheng Canyang said, "Hit fast."
Hai Ri: "..."
Sheng Canyang turned over the phone screen and let him see it, and it was actually downloading.
Hai Ri: "You're trying to provoke the relationship between Huang Mao and me. Huang Mao asked you to let go before you said, but you didn't want to. Don't tell him it's because of me."
Sheng Canyang squeezed his temples and said, "He watches those non-mainstream TV dramas on the Internet every day, which gives me a headache."
Hae Il was very interested: "What is he looking at?"
Sheng Canyang felt even more headache, and said, "You two go back and communicate."
Hai Ri: "Okay. Shall I wash first or you?"
"I suggest you don't go," Sheng Canyang said without raising his head, "Go to sleep tonight, and from the moment you enter the room, don't leave my sight."
Hai Ri suddenly remembered the blood that morning. He went directly to bed decisively: "Okay."
The author has something to say: Thanks to the little angels who voted for me or irrigated nutrient solution during 2020-07-04 03:16:00~2020-07-05 03:26:06~
Thanks to the little angel of the irrigation nutrient solution: 5 bottles of Fulijiu_yunya; 1 bottle of Yiran;
Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!