It was a long time after the call was disconnected, but Li Xuan still seemed to hear the sound of rain mixed with thunder and lightning. He looked out the window and saw that it was late at night. It turned out that the rain had stopped again.
He put down the phone slowly. His arms felt sore from holding it for too long. He stretched his numb fingers and typed "Sheng Min's birthday live broadcast" in the search box.
I pressed the enter key, and sure enough, a large number of related web news and videos popped up. It was easy to find those dazzling keywords among the dense text. The cursor moved over it, but it was not opened. When I closed the page, I suddenly remembered that Sheng Min's birthday was coming again.
In the following days, they did not contact each other again, just like when they separated from the hospital. During this long period of disconnection, Li Xuan realized more clearly that his phone call that day was not what Sheng Min expected.
Sheng Min did not expect any response, his efforts were just efforts.
Li Xuan, realizing this, began to suffer from insomnia. In the middle of the night, he had to increase his workload to barely divert his attention. However, no matter how much code he wrote, he would still think of Sheng Min's face in some distracted moments. Several times, he opened the flight page of the airline, and at most three hours, he could go to Sheng Min's side, but in the end he still failed to press the ticket purchase button.
It seemed as if the two selves were constantly pulling at each other, and Li Xuan found it difficult to tell what was hindering him.
He tried to analyze it step by step like solving a programming problem, and the only conclusion he could come to was not gender.
Although he had not had much affection for the word homosexual, it didn't matter to him now that it happened to him. He didn't care about other people's eyes, nor did he think he was homosexual. Li Xuan knew very well that he would not have such hesitation towards anyone other than Sheng Min.
If he was his lost rib, whether he was a boy or a girl was the least of his worries.
But even if he thought about it clearly, he still couldn't approach Sheng Min openly. This was not the crux of the problem. It was like walking in a maze, and the exit was only separated by a wall, and there was no way to get around it.
"Still working overtime?" The office door was suddenly pushed open. "Why is the air conditioner on such a low setting?"
Li Xuan looked up from the computer: "Why are you back?"
"A piece of document was taken away." Chu Tianheng raised the folder in his hand.
"You've made another trip to get it back. Don't you have to come back early tomorrow morning? No one's urging you to finish it tonight."
"I remember now. I won't feel at ease unless I confirm it once." Chu Tianheng walked over and glanced at his computer screen. "You are still working."
"Add a search function to the prop box." Li Xuan pinched the bridge of his nose. "Okay, senior, you can go back now. It's so late, it's okay to arrive later tomorrow. Don't run back and forth next time. Aren't you tired of going back and forth?"
Chu Tianheng nodded, sat on the sofa and didn't move. After a while, he called him again: "Li Xuan."
"Hmm? Anything else?"
"Let's go downstairs and have something to eat?" Chu Tianheng looked at the untouched fruit plate next to him, "I remember you didn't come out for dinner either?"
"I'm not hungry."
"Of course you won't feel hungry if you've been hungry before." Chu Tianheng insisted, "Let's not go far, just eat something downstairs."
Li Xuan glanced at him and turned off the computer screen: "Let's go."
There are several vending machines under each building in the software park. There are many people here and the things sell out quickly. They are restocked every other day. It’s a bit late today and there are only a few buckets of instant noodles and soda crackers left.
"You said you wanted to eat instant noodles earlier. I remember there should be some in the storage room." Li Xuan took the paper bowl handed to him by Chu Tianheng.
"There are only peppercorns in the storeroom, and I gave you two more sausages."
Li Xuan smiled, picked up the noodles and ate a few mouthfuls before asking him, "Senior, you called me down specifically, do you have something to say?"
"Nothing." Chu Tianheng hesitated, "Li Xuan, are you in a bad mood recently?"
Li Xuan put down the spoon, took the napkin and pressed the corner of his lips without saying anything. Chu Tianheng smiled: "It sounds like you are meddling in other people's business..."
"No way."
"I just think that you shouldn't put too much pressure on yourself." Chu Tianheng said sincerely, "It's not my place to say this, after all, you're my boss... Don't shake your head, this is the truth. But I really don't think you need to push yourself too hard."
"Not bad."
"How can it be fine? You've been working like this for almost a week... You're in the same company, and everyone can see you. Qi Boyuan used to joke that you don't need to sleep. That's not true." Chu Tianheng scratched his head, "I just looked at your computer, and you've been working so fast these days... You really haven't slept, right? Did something happen? At your pace, the three people in the art team can't keep up."
Li Xuan smiled and said, "No need to rush. I'm not rushing you either. Just follow the schedule and don't look at me."
"That's not what I meant." Chu Tianheng was a little anxious. "If the update requires it, everyone should speed up. I have no objection to that. It's because you don't urge us and just work hard on your own that I ask you and give you some advice."
"You are the boss and the lead programmer. I can understand you. The company has just started and Yi Yu became popular right away. You have a lot of pressure on your shoulders..."
"Senior, senior." Li Xuan interrupted him, "No, you misunderstood. I'm not working overtime every day because I'm anxious to update the game. If I really want to catch up, none of you will be able to rest... I just can't sleep, so I write programs to distract myself."
"Even if I can't sleep, it's still the company..."
"No, really not." Li Xuan smiled helplessly, "It's just my personal matter."
Chu Tianheng was stunned for a moment, then came back to his senses and said, "Is that so."
"I'll go get a bottle of water." Li Xuan saw that he was a little embarrassed and pushed the instant noodles aside. "What do you want to drink?"
"Anything is fine, soda water."
"Lime?"
Li Xuan stood up and walked to the vending machine. Just as he was about to choose a drink, he suddenly saw the screen on top of the vending machine. The original beverage promotional picture was changed to Sheng Min's photo, which was a birthday support made by fans. The vending machines in the software park had been replaced at some point. On the LED screen of the building opposite, Sheng Min's video was also scrolling during the peak traffic period around 8 o'clock every morning.
Since Sheng Min became famous, it has been about the same every year. Li Xuan never noticed it before, but now he can see it everywhere and can't escape it.
"Li Xuan?" He had been absent-minded for too long, and Chu Tianheng couldn't help but call him.
"What?"
"I said yes. Lime flavor is fine."
"Okay." Li Xuan swiped two bottles of water, bent down to take them out from the delivery port, returned to the bench and sat down, and couldn't help but take a look at the photo on the vending machine.
Sheng Min’s birthday is less than ten days away.
The studio has already posted his schedule for this month, and the company will hold a birthday fan meeting the day before his birthday.
A big fan in the super topic revealed that Sheng Min took a flight back to City N in the early morning of the birthday party. And because he had to attend the 10th anniversary celebration of a fashion magazine two days after his birthday, some fans speculated that he should stay a few more days before joining the crew.
Li Xuan didn't remember when he read the messages. Perhaps it was because his memory was deliberately blurred, but he remembered all the contents, including every punctuation mark.
He pressed his brows, lowered his head and drank a sip of water. Chu Tianheng on the opposite side held his hair and said, "You said it's a private matter, I don't know what to say."
"It was nothing."
"I usually don't say these things, you know. It's just that I see you've been so tense lately, and I'm worried. Today, I just happened to say something. I want Qi Boyuan to talk to you, but I don't think he's any better." Chu Tianheng said as he cleared the paper bag on the table. "Last time, I heard Qi Boyuan say that you're a few months younger than him, less than 22, right?"
"Almost there." Li Xuan's voice softened unconsciously.
"You're still young. If you hadn't mentioned it, I would have forgotten that you two are both students and haven't graduated yet."
"You sound like you're sixty." Li Xuan shook his head and smiled, "You're only three years older than us."
"A few years older is still older, and you did call me senior. Do you think I'm taking advantage of my age? ... That's not the right word. Just ignore it. As long as you understand it, that's the meaning." Chu Tianheng shook his head. "Anyway, I still say that. Don't put too much pressure on yourself. Really, it's the same for both personal and professional matters. You don't have to do everything perfectly. It's too tiring for you to sort it out."
Li Xuan was silent for a moment. Seeing Chu Tianheng rubbing his eyes and looking a little tired, he said, "I'm going upstairs. Senior, you should go back too. It's almost two o'clock."
"Okay. Don't work overtime, just go upstairs and sleep. If you're really in a bad mood, take a break. Since you said it's not work, forget it. If it is, just tell us and we can do it. No one's way of solving problems is to work overtime."
"I know." Li Xuan hummed, and then said, "I will talk to the administration tomorrow and ask them to buy two boxes of tomato instant noodles for the company. Qi Boyuan bought the Sichuan pepper instant noodles. This will save you from having to drag me downstairs when you want to eat noodles in the middle of the night."
"Hey, I'm not... I only have tomatoes left."
"Then tell her what flavor you want."
"It's not about noodles, stop changing the subject..." Chu Tianheng couldn't help laughing.
"Got it." Li Xuan stood up and pressed his shoulder, "Okay, I'm really fine, you can go back."