This answer was unexpected. Li Xuan glanced at him, said nothing, and reached for his phone. The text message alert sounded soon, and Qi Boyuan looked at the number on the message: "It won't take that much."
"It's not too much, it's not too little. If you need anything, just tell me directly."
"That's enough. It's nothing else..." Qi Boyuan glanced outside the door, then turned back, looking a little shy. "Jia Jia said that once the materials are submitted this time, her stay in school will be a done deal... I want to propose to her on the day she gets the school's offer letter. I plan to buy a ring in the next two days. All my money is in the stock market... Hey, hey, don't have that expression... Don't tell Jia Jia."
Li Xuan didn't say anything for a while. He looked at him for a long time, which made Qi Boyuan a little confused. He grabbed the cup, but it was too hot. The water touched his lips and he put it down again. He frowned and confirmed: "You want to propose? Now?"
"Lower your voice. Of course not now. We haven't bought the ring yet, and Jia Jia's engagement letter hasn't come down yet... maybe next week." Qi Boyuan was probably in a really good mood. His eyes and eyebrows were flying, and he was in the mood to joke with him. "I remember that our company should not have a rule that employees cannot get married before a certain age."
"We can also make a decision now." Li Xuan managed to calm down and pulled his thoughts back to his original position. He coughed as if nothing had happened and said, "You're not going to take a wedding leave, right?"
"Of course, I have to work hard for you." Qi Boyuan smiled, "Thank you for your sponsorship. I'll deduct it from next month's salary. I'll go back to work first."
Li Xuan nodded, but changed his mind within two seconds and called him: "Qi Boyuan."
Qi Boyuan was about to leave: "You say."
Li Xuan was silent for a while, then shook his head: "Forget it."
"you... ... "
"Nothing. Go get busy first."
The weather this year seemed to be particularly abnormal. The sun was still scorching hot just after the Great Heat, and the rainstorms always came suddenly. Li Xuan finished smoking two cigarettes on the balcony and witnessed the whole process of a rain cloud gathering and dispersing.
Just as he took out the third cigarette, the glass door was pushed open from behind.
"The diamond ring you like is too expensive?" Li Xuan didn't even turn his head. "There's a card in the second drawer under my desk. You can just advance this year's salary."
"You make me sound like I'm borrowing money from everywhere." Qi Boyuan pushed the cup of coffee in his hand to him. He must have calmed down from the joy of proposing to him and started to pay attention to other things. "I think about it and still feel uneasy. Let's talk?"
"I thought you were crazy with joy. I'm not a wedding planner, what are you talking about with me?"
"I thought you wanted to talk to me." Qi Boyuan said carefully.
"In no mood."
Li Xuan lowered his head slightly, relit the cigarette on his lips, blew out a smoke ring and then dissipated it. With a blank expression on his face, he looked really unmoved. When Qi Boyuan was thinking that this trip was in vain, he suddenly heard Li Xuan speak in a muffled voice, "How are you sure it's hers?"
"Hmm?" Qi Boyuan was stunned for a second, then turned to look at him. Li Xuan immediately turned his face away.
"What's the problem?" Qi Boyuan bumped his shoulder and laughed, "You've been so worried for more than a month because of this? ... I was right when I said you'd bloom from a difficult situation. Who is it?"
"I'm talking about you now, don't bring me up."
"Okay, okay, okay." Qi Boyuan made a gesture of surrender, "Talk to me, talk to me... Let me think about it, how can I be sure of this... Does this need to be confirmed?"
Li Xuan did not answer, but leaned his back against the railing, half looking up at the faint sunlight in the sky. After a long silence, he started to speak in a strange way: "When I first started learning programming, the first program I wrote was hello world."
"Me too." Qi Boyuan didn't quite understand what he meant. "Programmers all over the world should be the same in this regard."
"I was short of money at that time. I forgot who told me that writing code could make money. I bought a book for three dollars and fifty cents at a second-hand bookstore, and then went to an Internet cafe to study by myself." Li Xuan pressed his temple and continued, "I didn't know anything at the time, but I knew that if I pressed the keys one by one, the correct result would be output. I also knew what the standard answer was."
Qi Boyuan understood a little: "No, Li Xuan, this is different. Feelings..."
"I know it's different..." Li Xuan interrupted him but didn't continue.
"You don't want to talk again." Qi Boyuan stopped listening halfway and made a sound of sighing.
"There's nothing to say." Li Xuan pressed his brows and looked down at the traffic downstairs, "You can go out."
"Why should I go out? Leave you here to make circles for yourself?" Qi Boyuan patted his shoulder as he was about to finish his cigarette. "Tell me, I don't really want to hear much. Don't look at me as if I'm helping you solve your problems... How about this, let me ask you another way. Why this person? Why don't you suspect that you have some special feelings for me?"
"What are you dreaming about?" Li Xuan rolled his eyes at him.
"I won't do that to Xiao Ding, Jia Jia, or other people in our company." Qi Boyuan added seriously, "Let me give you an example. I'm about to get married, so I'm innocent."
"Just make a decision first." Li Xuan put out his cigarette and turned to walk towards the office, but Qi Boyuan grabbed his neck and frowned, "What? Let go."
"I'm almost done with the horoscope. Don't leave. Let me finish my story. Don't you think my question is very insightful?"
"What do you think?" Li Xuan shook him off and tried to light another cigarette, but his lighter failed to light up after several attempts. He leaned on the railing with his arms, remained silent for a moment, and spoke in a very calm voice, "After all, feelings are a biochemical reaction, hormones, dopamine, adrenaline... I'm not sure if our hormones have affected each other..."
"Wait, wait a minute." Qi Boyuan interrupted him with a subtle look as if he had seen a ghost, "Whose sex hormone affects you? Not... sex hormones or pheromones? You have surpassed my knowledge of mathematics, physics and chemistry... Is there something wrong with my understanding or your expression? How do these things affect each other? Are you living in some ABO world?"
"What's all this mess?" Li Xuan was puzzled.
"What are you talking about?" Qi Boyuan was also shocked, but he did not forget to explain, "ABO is, how to say it, this is what Jiajia told me..."
"Stop it." Li Xuan knew it was not a serious matter, "I can't explain it to you clearly."
"Take your time, I'm not in a hurry."
"I'm anxious!"
After Li Xuan said this, he fell silent again facing Qi Boyuan's surprised look.
After a long while, he sat down in frustration and dejection, lowered his head slightly, and smiled bitterly: "... ... I was also afraid that he would be anxious... ... I used to think that it was best to have a plan for everything. It didn't matter if there was no plan. If I made a mistake, I could always make it right. There has never been a big mistake..."
He paused for a second here, his voice a little tired: "But he is different... ... I don't know what it should be like, but if, I mean if we are both wrong, if one day I find out it's not true, what will he do? I have made this decision, and I will never change it in this life, but he won't force anything. I don't want and can't let this relationship make him feel uncomfortable one day."
He spoke softly, but his expression was very serious, as if he was discussing an important business matter: "The last time I saw him, there were a few moments when I felt that he was very strange, but then I realized that it was actually me who was strange. The more I wanted to find the right solution and sort out all the problems, the more I lost my ideas, day by day, and in the end, everyone was unrecognizable."