ten days ago
It was on the third day after King Zhan left the capital that the third prince, Chun Yuyi, "followed the will of heaven and responded to the hearts of the people" and ascended the throne of the emperor of Chu.
On the day of the enthronement ceremony, the third prince, Chunyu Yi, wore a newly purchased bright yellow dragon robe, a heavenly crown, five-color ribbons, yellow ground bones, white feathers, and green crimson edges. The tallest chair in the palace.
However, in fact, the child didn't want to sit here at all. The queen mother forced him into the palace from the palace, and she kept telling him that he wanted him to inherit his father's business, and he couldn't be called his father's emperor. The country was taken away by others...
He doesn't care whether the country is taken away or not, anyway, they are all descendants of Chunyu's family, so whoever sits on this chair is different? Why does the queen mother have to force him to sit here? If he is disobedient, the queen mother will kill his dear nanny. He is also forced to sit here. In fact, he really wants to go back to the palace and live quietly with the nanny there. Live quietly, no one scares him, and no one forces him to do things he doesn't want to do.
He is still young, so he doesn't want to get involved in this treacherous court dispute!
When he saw the group of old men bowing down to him, he was so frightened that he almost ran away, if not for the eunuch holding the pen and ceremonies beside him who had been watching him, he would have run away as soon as he could.
"Long live the emperor, long live, long live—"
Faced with the shouts from below, Chunyuyi swallowed hard, thinking back to what his mother taught him—what should he do at this moment
Oh, right!
"Well, all the gentlemen... Pingshen..."
The little emperor stammered, his voice was so low that even the minister standing in the front couldn't hear clearly, it was the eunuch holding a pen and ceremonies who yelled for him in a high-pitched voice, and all the officials thanked him and got up.
After everyone got up, Chun Yuyi was a little confused. He didn't know what to say to everyone at this moment. His eyes were flustered and he was at a loss. He didn't have the calmness and calmness when he cried for the mausoleum on the day of the late emperor's burial. persistent.
"Oh, that, if it's okay, everyone, no, let's go, let's go, um, yes, let's go..."
Because he really didn't know what to say, so the little emperor felt that since he had nothing to say, he should go back to his own house and find his own mother.
All the officials looked at each other in blank dismay, all shocked by the new emperor's rashness. This is the enthronement ceremony. Under normal circumstances, the new emperor should amnesty the world during the enthronement ceremony, give his mother the title of empress dowager, and canonize the sixth palace (even if the emperor is young, I haven't married yet, but the matter of giving titles to my mother and grandmother should not be left behind, and this one, who didn't issue this edict, is about to leave the court in such a panic, how can this be like a grand enthronement ceremony? , It's like a child's play house!
In fact, the little emperor did not give titles to his mother and grandmother, nor did he give amnesty to the world. These things are not bad for him at all. Promise him that she will listen to politics behind the curtain when he ascends the throne, and she can handle everything. He only needs to sit on that dragon chair, and he doesn't need to do anything at all, but just a few days before he ascends the throne God, the queen mother suddenly fell ill, and she was so dizzy that it was impossible for him to listen to politics behind the curtain.
No way, he had to come alone.
As for what to do when he ascended the throne, no one taught him, he really didn't know!
At this time, the Empress Dowager Xiaoduan was standing behind the screen behind the dragon chair, listening to the farce in front of her, secretly happy in her heart: "Look, this is your new emperor. Let's see if such a silly child is suitable." Suitable to be the king of a country? Those pedantic veterans who secretly supported his ascension to the throne, see if you slap your face or not? Let's see whether he is suitable to be the emperor or King Zhan is suitable to be the emperor
That's right, all of this was intentional by the Empress Dowager Xiaoduan. Although she agreed to allow Chunyu Yi to ascend the throne, she only agreed on the surface. In her heart, she still hoped that her son would ascend the throne. Yes, Chunyu Yi was enthroned as scheduled, but no one was sent to instruct him on the etiquette of enthroning, let alone what he should do at the ceremony.
If Chun Yuyi is smart and capable, even if there is no one to point him out, he can still hold on to the scene, even if he is not doing well enough, he will not make a joke. Unfortunately, he is neither smart nor capable, he is just a nanny It's just a child nursing in his arms, it's completely impossible for him to support such a big scene by himself!
The new prime minister, Wang Hongwei, said: "Your Majesty, when you ascend the throne today, you should confer titles on the Empress Dowager, the Empress Dowager, the Empress Dowager, and the titles on the two empresses, and posthumously confer titles on the late Emperor, the First Crown Prince, and the other princes! "
When Chunyuyi heard that he wanted to seal this one and that one, one head became two big for a while, he turned his face and said, "You can handle this according to your discretion, I... Uh, I believe you can help me with this matter." Get it done!"
"However, this matter is related to the late emperor and the two empresses. As a descendant of Chunyu's family, His Majesty should do it by himself and should not shirk!" Prime Minister Wang said with a straight face.
Lord Lin, Shang Shu of the Ministry of Rites, also remonstrated: "Your Majesty, please act according to the routine, and don't shirk, lest the late emperor's spirit in heaven will be difficult to rest in peace!"
Everyone also played together: "Your Majesty, please follow the routine and don't shirk!"
The little emperor saw that everyone was coming to force him, and almost made him cry. He looked left and right, and suddenly stood up and said, "I have to pee, I'm going to pee!" to run.
The eunuch Bingbi Sili hastily knelt down, stopped in front of him, and said: "Your Majesty, you can leave after you seal it up, otherwise it will be unreasonable!"
The little emperor also wanted to seal up before leaving, but he didn't know how to seal it. I remember that the titles of the ancestors were very particular. A title had more than a dozen characters, and some had seven or eight characters. They all have to be carefully considered, and they all have profound implications. He doesn't understand them at all, and he doesn't know how to do them at all.
"I can't hold it anymore, if you stop me again, I'll piss right here!" He couldn't seal it up, and couldn't run away, so the little emperor had no choice but to play tricks, even pretending to lift up his dragon robe to take off his pants.
All the officials in the court were angry and disappointed when they saw the emperor's sloppy and shameless appearance. Many worthy ministers trembled with anger. Where does he look a little bit like a father? It's clearly a sloppy rascal!
... It is simply unreasonable, unreasonable!
"Your Majesty, no, you are the king of a country, how can you do such an indecent thing in the court? You will be ridiculed by the world..." Someone remonstrated.
Chunyuyi didn't care who was laughing at him or not. He covered his penis and shouted: "Then won't I be ridiculed by the world if I piss my pants in court? What's wrong with the king of a country? The king of a country is also a human being I don’t care if I want to eat or drink, I want to pee anyway, if you won’t let me go, I’ll pee on my pants for you to see!”
Seeing this situation, everyone was pissed off, but pissed off, pissed off, there was really no way to deal with the emperor letting them go, because everyone present was one of the top bosses in the family, and it was too late for the children in the family to curry favor with them Well, how dare you let them go
Besides, this is the newly enthroned emperor. They have done too much, and they will be criticized as deceiving the emperor!
In the end, the little emperor ran away without turning his head when everyone was dumbfounded, as if he had been kicked out by a wolf in a hurry.
After running away, the emperor never came back. The eunuch who sent to invite said that the emperor suddenly felt unwell and had already gone back to the palace to rest...
Thus, the solemn enthronement ceremony came to an end in a flurry of jitters, like a farce, with a gorgeous opening and an absurd ending.
When the little emperor returned to the bedroom, he saw his wet nurse, and threw himself into the wet nurse's arms and cried loudly: "Nurse, when are we going home? I don't want to stay here, it's terrible here, and everyone should care about it." I, kill people at every turn, I like this place, let's go home, shall we..."
The wet nurse is just an ordinary woman with little knowledge. Although her heart is generous and kind, she doesn't have any scheming. Seeing that the little emperor has been wronged, she can only hug him and cry in distress. There is no solution at all!
When the Empress Dowager Xiaoduan heard about it, she just sneered and said nothing else.
This kid, thanks to his lack of ambition, otherwise she really wouldn't be able to tolerate him, but since he is a kid who doesn't know anything, he is her grandson anyway, so let him live...
In the next few days, the strange cases of the little emperor constantly refreshed everyone's views on him.
It can be seen that this child really doesn't want to be the emperor. Every day when he goes to court, he has a bitter face, as if he is going to be sentenced. He doesn't say anything in the court hall and doesn't care about anything. It's all the same sentence - you figure it out
If someone persuaded him to work hard and revive the court, he would say angrily, "I think I'm not doing well, so you come to be the emperor, just as I don't want to be!"
Every time he goes down, he will show a relieved expression, like a prisoner who has been released after serving his sentence, and his face is completely different from when he goes up.
Seeing such an emperor, everyone is going to die of worry, what's the matter? Originally, it would be enough to make a baby doll become the emperor, but it is not worrying to have this doll. How will the days ahead be!
Seeing the uglier faces of the people in the court every day, the Empress Dowager Xiaoduan was so satisfied, the more outrageous the little emperor was, the happier she was, and she would be happy only if everyone couldn't tolerate him!
But after a few days, I can't enjoy it anymore.
Because that poisonous woman—Empress Chen ran away!
Originally, she was imprisoned in the palace and guarded by heavy guards. The Empress Dowager Xiaoduan thought it was safe, but she dug a tunnel under the phoenix couch in the bedroom. Even her closest confidants didn't know about the tunnel. He slipped away under his nose.
This woman's mind is really unfathomable!
The Empress Dowager Xiaoduan sensed her danger, and immediately ordered a search of the whole city, but the imperial guards almost turned the capital over, but found nothing. She didn't know that at this time, Empress Chen had already driven hundreds of miles away by car. They are heading for the navy camp in Fuzhou.
Empress Chen fled with hatred in her heart.
At the beginning, she didn't intend to run away. In her plan, she asked Wusun's little prince to kidnap Shen Ruolan, and used Shen Ruolan to lure Chunyuzhen back, but her men robbed and killed him on the way.
In this way, after Chun Yuzhen died, only the old queen mother remained. Although that old thing is more powerful than her, her scheming is far inferior to her own. She only needs to use a little tricks to reverse the overall situation. At that time, the government will have to fall back into her hands. Her Chen Miaolian's world
However, what he never expected was that after Shen Ruolan's accident, that bastard Chun Yuzhen broke into her bedroom without knowing the rules, and even shot her with a hidden weapon, leaving her bedridden. He was imprisoned under surveillance.
He also took care of all her people, making her like an eagle whose wings have been cut off. She always has the ability to soar over Kyushu, but she has to be bullied by the old house sparrow of the Queen Mother. She can't resist if she wants to stand up. It was even more impossible, she had no choice but to leave the capital and go to Fuzhou to find that little beggar, no, now he is the deputy general in the Fuzhou camp, and she wanted to rely on him to make trouble.
Along the way, she kept calling the more powerful forces and talents she had cultivated over the years, as well as many strange people in the world. These people will all be used as sharp blades for her revenge. One day, she He wanted to return to the capital, and cut Empress Dowager Xiaoduan and his darling son under the sword, and let them know what would happen if they offended her...
**
"What? Let me go to the palace?"
When she heard the news, Shen Ruolan's mouth was so surprised that she could stuff an egg into it.
The shopkeeper said, "Yes, the people from the palace are still waiting outside, girl Lan, hurry up and get ready."
Shen Ruolan clicked her lips twice, and said embarrassingly, "But, why did you ask me to go to the palace? Why did you ask me to go?"
The shopkeeper laughed and said, "I heard that it is for the wives and grandmas in the backyard to make spicy hot pot and kebabs. The prince's backyard is not allowed to enter men, so I have to ask you to go. You should get rid of the guy's business." Take it, go there earlier, if you make those ladies wait in a hurry, it will be bad if you blame it."
Seeing that Shen Ruolan still looked like he was beaten, the old shopkeeper couldn't help but persuaded in a low voice: "Go quickly, if the prince sees that your cooking is delicious, he can't help but leave you as the cook of the palace, then It's much more respectable than being the second shopkeeper of our small shop, you should seize the opportunity."
Shen Ruolan hehehe.
Still seize the opportunity, she wants to seize the opportunity to escape now, okay
"Well, shopkeeper, I suddenly feel a little uncomfortable, why don't you go?" She wanted to let go.
The shopkeeper hurriedly said, "Oh, Miss Lan, you can't be willful. Who is the little prince? If someone orders you to go there, you dare to shirk it, unless you don't want to live! Besides, it's just asking you to go Make a meal of Mala Tang, grill a meal of meat skewers, it’s not that you will be punished, why are you in trouble? If you make a good meal, you may get a lot of rewards, go ahead, don’t tell me, if If the prince waits in a hurry, the food will be ruined."
Shen Ruolan thought for a while, and felt that since she was asked to cook, she must be busy in the kitchen, and she might not be able to see the Lord of the Plague God, so go ahead and push her back to cause trouble for herself.
So he packed up the hot and spicy things, took a kebab stove and hundreds of kebabs, and followed the woman sent by the palace to the car.
In the car, the woman had a straight face and told her some rules of the palace, for example, when you arrive at the palace, you can't look around or talk casually. Look at the face and wait....
Shen Ruolan agreed with her mouth, but in fact, it was the left ear listening to the right ear popping out.
After about a stick of incense, I arrived at the palace. Because Shen Ruolan was just a 'cook', her status was low, and she was not worthy of walking through the main gate of the palace. She drove the carriage to the back corner gate of the palace without even asking. Go into the backyard through the corner door.
Entering the backyard of the palace, Shen Ruolan originally planned to enjoy the scenery of the palace, but the woman stopped shouting, "I forgot the rules I taught you in the car just now!"
So, Shen Ruolan had no choice but to lower her head again, and followed behind the woman with lowered eyebrows, walked around for a long time, and walked into the big kitchen in the backyard.
The big kitchen is a large and wide yard, in which there are lots of chopped firewood, and there are several cages near the corner, which contain chickens, ducks, geese, rabbits and other poultry.
There are also a few large vats, but I don't know if they are filled with miso or pickled pickles.
After entering the house, I saw five or six stoves built against the wall, and several pots and stoves were installed on them. The woman who brought her pointed to the pots and stoves and said, "Girl, let's do it now." , the ladies are still waiting to eat, and what about the meat skewer you mentioned? Let’s make it too!”
Shen Ruolan thought for a while, and asked the woman in charge of the kitchen to send her a few cooks to help her, let them cook, and she would direct.
In this way, she can teach them the skills of kebabs and steaming Malatang. If these ladies don't have enough to eat and want to eat, someone in their house can make them for them, and it will save them from going to her again .
She doesn't mind passing on the secret recipe of Malatang and the seasoning of kebabs to them at all, as long as she is not allowed to come to this Ping'an Palace, she is willing to provide them with cumin and pepper for free. This palace, she I don't want to come again...
Considering that it will take longer to cook the kebabs, I decided to grill the kebabs first, and then heat them.
So he ordered the helper to light the charcoal and fan the fire, and then asked someone to set up a table by the stove, put various seasonings on it, and start roasting.
She just stood at the edge of the oven and directed without doing anything. Kebabs are not a difficult technical task. As long as the meat is good, the seasoning is complete, the heat is well controlled, and the seasoning is sprinkled at the right time, it is generally grilled. delicious.
Under Shen Ruolan's command, the two chefs roasted hundreds of oily meat skewers in a short while, and she commanded the other two women to cook several bowls of spicy spicy soup.
The meat skewers and Malatang were ready, and immediately the yard was full of fragrance. Several cooks drooled and sent the meat skewers and Malatang to Miss Liu's yard.
At that time, Miss Liu's room had already gathered several beauties who were fat and thin, and they were all invited by Liu'er to eat meat skewers and spicy soup.
Everyone is from the prince’s backyard, they have enjoyed all the glory and wealth, and they have eaten all kinds of delicious food. They didn’t have much hope for the meat skewers and Mala Tang, but the cooks cooked them When the meat skewers and malatang were served, everyone could smell the aroma that made their index fingers move. They knew that they were ignorant and short-sighted.
Malatang and meat skewers are really delicious, more fragrant than the delicacies they usually eat. All the beauties are young and strong, and they all prefer heavy flavors, so this meat skewers and Malatang are especially in their hearts.
Everyone ate the delicious meat skewers and felt that they were not satisfied, so they called for wine and drank while eating. When the wine was half drunk, someone proposed to invite the little prince to have fun together. Everyone is the wife of the little prince. Of course, they all want the little prince to come over to eat and drink with them, so he immediately sent someone to invite him. When the little prince heard that the concubines invited him to drink and eat meat skewers, he became interested, so he went to Liu'er's yard happily. coming.
Although Liu'er's yard is exquisite, it's just a little small. After the little prince came, he felt a little crowded, so he asked someone to move the mats to the lake pavilion, so that everyone could eat and drink while enjoying the time. Watch the lotus.
The female family members of rich families always talk about wine, unlike ordinary women who just eat with their cheeks open. When they eat wine, they either order wine or enjoy singing and dancing. A lot of fun games, so drinking has become extra fun.
The little prince took all the beauties to sit in the pavilion in the middle of the lake, while drinking and eating meat skewers, while appreciating the lotus wine orders, it was very pleasant, but the only downside was that it was too far away from the back kitchen, and the meat skewers were sent here after they were grilled It was much colder, and the little prince felt that it was not as delicious as the freshly baked ones, so he ordered the stove to be moved here to eat and bake them right away.
When Shen Ruolan heard that they were asked to go to the lake to have a barbecue, and the little prince was there, she felt very uncomfortable, but the matter has come to this point, no matter what, she had no choice but to bite the bullet.
So, a group of cooks lifted the stove, those who took the skewers took the skewers, those who moved the tables moved the tables, and those who brought the seasonings took the seasonings, and a group of cooks came to the lake in a mighty way.
The kitchen ladies in the palace are all dressed in the same uniform and have the same hairstyle. Walking in such a group of people, Shen Ruolan has become the most prominent presence, and it's hard for people not to pay attention!
Liu'er also saw Shen Ruolan at a glance. She heard the prince said that the meat skewers and malatang were made by this cook, and she was very curious about her, so she told everyone about it.
After being introduced by her, everyone's eyes couldn't help but fall on Shen Ruolan.
Shen Ruolan and all the cooks came to the lake, set up the stove and prepared to continue the barbecue. At this time, a girl came out of the pavilion in the middle of the lake and sent a message to Shen Ruolan, saying that the wives wanted to see her.
Shen Ruolan raised her eyes, and saw from a distance the gang of Yingying and Yanyan in the center of the lake, all of them raised their necks to look at her. Moreover, the one sitting among the group of women is the plague god that he saw during the day!
Shen Ruolan's heart twitched twice, she took a deep breath, and after some psychological training for herself, she lowered her head, pretended to be pleasing to the eye, and followed that girl to the Huxin Pavilion.
"Little girl pays respects to the prince and ladies."
Shen Ruolan said a blessing like sticking a candle, afraid that he would recognize her own voice, she purposely spoke in a low voice, but she didn't dare to make her voice so nasty as she did at noon.
No way, I'm afraid someone will cut her tongue.
At this time, an elderly well-dressed old woman suddenly put on a straight face, slammed the table, and shouted angrily, "What an unruly thing, how dare you not kneel when you see the prince, you have eaten the ambitious leopard!" dare?"
Shen Ruolan was startled, and looked up at the old woman full of pearls and emeralds. This old woman was of poor appearance and fat. She definitely couldn't be the prince's concubine, but she couldn't be the prince's wife either.
The prince's old lady is definitely still in the palace now, even if she is here with him, it is impossible to sit in his subordinate position.
She thought about it for a while, and quickly guessed the identity of this old woman. It is very likely that she is the prince's nanny. Seeing her arrogant and arrogant appearance, she seems to be very embarrassing in front of the prince, otherwise She can't dare to be so awkward.
And this God of Plague was able to indulge his nanny very much, even if she yelled and yelled unruly under his nose, he didn't seem to be listening, he seemed to have gotten used to it.
This surprised Shen Ruolan. Seeing that he was trying to catch her all the time, she thought that he was a fussy guy who would take revenge, but judging from the current situation, her understanding of him seemed to be a bit off.
Usually, there are two types of people who can pamper a nanny, one is the one who has no mother since childhood and regards the nanny as his own mother; Treat people as their own relatives.
And this young prince's old lady is still alive, but he can pamper his nanny like this, it can be seen that he belongs to the second type of person, that is, the kind with a gentle temperament and a focus on family affection!
Unexpectedly, he turned out to be such a person, Shen Ruolan's impression of him was not so bad in an instant.
"I'm talking about you, didn't you hear me? Why don't you hurry up and salute the prince." Seeing that Shen Ruolan was still indifferent, as if she didn't take herself seriously, she couldn't help but growl louder!
Shen Ruolan wouldn't kneel and kowtow to anyone, she was still pregnant with a baby, she didn't want her baby to be bowed down and kowtowed before it was born.
So, she lowered her head, still with the same low-browed and pleasing appearance, and said respectfully, "If you go back to Madam, a miner can't give a big gift to the prince, because a miner has a special destiny, whoever kowtows to him will die."
In order to prove her words, she deliberately pulled out her grandparents and aunt Chu Chu.
"When Minnv was one year old, she kowtowed to my grandparents to pay New Year's greetings. As a result, my grandparents were smoked to death the next day like a kang hole (carbon monoxide poisoning, a common thing in the north). They kowtowed, and they all had accidents, and they all died, and they all died miserably. The fortune-teller said that the women of the people can't kowtow to anyone in this life, unless they have a grudge against someone and want to curse him to death. Therefore, women dare not kowtow to the prince!"
"What? There is such a fate in this world? Are you lying?" Madam Lai asked suspiciously.
She is also considered an old man, and she has heard a lot of novel and absurd things in her life, but she has never heard of such a fate in this world.
"Minnie don't dare to lie to the lord and his wife. If the lady doesn't believe it, it's okay for the girl to give a big gift to the lord. The lord's status is precious, so maybe he can suppress my fate."
After she finished speaking, she lifted her skirt, ready to bow down to Yuan Hao.
Nanny Lai hurriedly said, "Okay, no need, since there is such a taboo, it is better to believe it or not. You also know that the prince is precious. If you are overwhelmed by your fate, you can bear it." ?"
Shen Ruolan couldn't wait for it, so she stood up, secretly proud in her heart.
At this time, Miss Liu'er said: "I heard that you came up with Malatang and kebabs. How did you come up with it?"
Shen Ruolan lowered her eyebrows and said pleasingly, "Returning to Madam, it was Minnv who accidentally read a miscellaneous book. It was written in that book. Minnv just tried it casually, but she succeeded unexpectedly."
"Hey, so you can still read!" A concubine said sourly.
Because she couldn't read, it was because of her pretty face that she won the favor of the prince and was able to enter the mansion. Later, when she competed with these beauties in the mansion, she was quickly defeated by them.
Therefore, being unable to read and write poems and composing Fu has always been a heart problem in her heart, but it is not easy to tell others.
At this moment, I heard that a cook can read and write, and even apply what she has learned, so she couldn't help being jealous.
On weekdays, she is often jealous of those beauties who are full of poetry and books, but because she has fallen out of favor, she dare not do anything to them, so she has been holding back her breath. Today, seeing this lowly cook She could read and write, and felt even more annoyed, so she took this tone out on her.
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Recommend an essay from the 1960s
Traveling through the 1960s, the Nongmen Army Wife
Rebirth of Xiaoyao
Once time travelling, Han Jiajun found helplessly that she had traveled to the difficult 1960s and became a little orphan girl with no parents, money, or food. There was a shortage of supplies here, but only the best products from all walks of life abounded. So, Miss Han started a life of making a fortune and tearing the best by hand. If you want to do it, you can do it, if you want to tear it, you can’t tear it up.
What are you afraid of when supplies are scarce? We have room!
What are you afraid of when the best product comes, we have wisdom!
What are you afraid of if you find fault and provoke me, we have a fiance.
Uh... by the way, fiancé? Since when did she have a fiancé
Or a black soldier brother
Fiance (indifferent face): You forgot? We got engaged when you were still wearing crotch pants!
Miss Han: Open crotch pants? So... didn't you see everything