Dehe Cemetery is the most expensive cemetery in Tongcheng. There is a saying that the land value of the people buried here is more expensive than the houses of many living people.
I am very satisfied with the place my father chose for my grandmother. It sits on the mountains, rivers and sea, and can see the purest scenery. It is quiet and pleasant.
"Grandma, I'm sorry," I was in front of the tomb, touched the tombstone, looked at the photo of my grandmother, my throat choked, "I'm back."
When the doctor announced that the rescue was invalid, I only dared to go outside the mortuary without the face to go in to see my grandma one last time. I didn't even dare to cry too loudly, I covered my mouth tightly, watching the people coming and going busy with their funerals.
After leaving the country, it is very difficult to live alone in a different place, and there are many trivial things. The first seven, invigorating, cremation, burial, funerals, and even the funerals of the first four years, I was completely absent.
When I think about it, I really have no conscience. The person who hurt the most when my grandma was alive was me, and I didn't even cry once.
When I was in my second year in Japan, I was sitting in an izakaya and saw a little brother playing the guitar, singing the songs of his hometown, saying that the old man sang to put the child to sleep. Listening and listening, my tears fell down, and the owner of the izakaya kept asking me if I needed help.
"Grandma, are you blaming me, so you haven't even had a dream for so many years?" As soon as my voice came out, it was scattered in the wind, broken and far away.
After some ramble, I put the flowers on the grave and left.
Going back to Lin Yuan, it was a very different feeling.
Lin Yuan was originally a century-old house passed down from the end of the Qing Dynasty. The great-grandfather's generation started to live in it. Later, it was renovated several times. The combination of Chinese and Western styles has a bit of garden flavor and a bit of European-style architecture. big.
Pressing the doorbell, it was not the familiar Aunt Fang who opened the door, but a middle-aged woman who looked much younger. She looked at me for a while and then asked, "You are Master Lin, right?"
I nodded, and she hurriedly opened the door with a smile and welcomed me in.
"Master and Madam are up there, I'll go talk to them."
I looked around and saw that the furnishings in the house had not changed. They were as simple as ever. I asked, "Where's Auntie Fang?"
"Aunt Fang is getting old. She went back to her hometown last year. I'm her niece-in-law, so you can just call me Sister Lan."
I went up the stairs and found my room. The door handle was a little rusty. I opened the door and went in. There was a musty smell.
"Cough cough..." I choked coughing.
I wouldn't recognize this as my room if I hadn't lived there for years.
The ground was covered with a thick layer of ash, and the curtains were thickly covered, making it impossible for light to pass through, and the cobwebs were still knotted in the corners. I would believe that no one has cleaned the place for five years.
Sister Lan was a little embarrassed: "You are in a hurry to come back. There are usually no people here. The old man and wife didn't say that they need to be cleaned, so they kept it like this. Why don't you sit downstairs and I'll give you a bath now?"
I shook my head: "No need, let it be useless."
Back in the living room, I wanted to sit down on the sofa, but before I could sit down, there was a steady sound of footsteps on the steps. When I looked up, my father had slowly walked downstairs.
His gold-rimmed glasses looked a little thicker, and the pipe in his hand also sipped from time to time. He gave me a straight look, then walked to the table, tapped in the ashtray, and shook out the shreds of tobacco. Come, and then take a sip of Pu'er to moisten your throat, and then say, "Are you back?"
I nodded stiffly, I really didn't know how to get along with my father.
At this moment, the door creaked open, and high heels stepped in, looking back, it was my mother who came back.
When she saw me, my mother paused for a while, obviously she didn't expect my appearance, and my father didn't tell her, so she lost her temper a little, then returned to normal and said, "When did you come back? "
"Today, just arrived."
"Well," she responded lightly, only to see her bowing her head and fiddling with the manicure she had just done, then slowly taking off her silk jacket, "A holiday?"
I resisted the urge to laugh, managed my expression and said word by word, "Mother, I graduated two years ago."
It can be seen in one sentence that the family's feelings are as indifferent as five years ago. She didn't know if she was listening, so she sat down at the table and instructed Sister Lan, "Let's have dinner."
Then began the awkward meal time as always.
For me as a child to this day, eating at home is really a very painful thing. Whether it was a family of a dozen or so now, they all sat down in front of the long table according to their seniority, silent, except for the sound of knives and forks colliding. That scene was not something to enjoy, but a ritual. , must be completed.
There is no family like us, they are so indifferent to each other, but they must follow the rules, chew the rice one by one, and swallow it with depression.
So in the noisy dining scene in the school cafeteria, even if the food is far inferior to that at home, I still eat with relish.
Neither my father nor my mother liked me, I have known since I was a child. One of them is the eldest son of a wealthy family, and the other is a lady from a family. In those days, people were especially concerned about being in the right household, so the two of them were reluctant to enter this marriage, to be precise, it was a marriage between business and government.
Father has a woman he likes. He believes that his contribution to marriage is nothing more than keeping money at home, and he has done his best, so he devotes all his love to the outside world.
I used to think that I was his only son anyway, he was just being strict with me after all, but when I accidentally smashed the token of love that his lover gave him, he punished me to kneel in the pavilion for one night, the wind and rain He didn't mind getting me wet.
Only then did I realize that he really didn't have much so-called fatherly love for me.
So I never only called his father, not his father.
And then a coincidence made me discover that God is fair, because of the body, the father has no way to extend the children more. Thinking about it is also ironic. The son he dislikes the most is also his only son. He hates it and has to accept this son. He should feel very uncomfortable.
Every time I think about it, I can't help but laugh.
My father glared at me: "What are you laughing at?"
Fortunately, I was full, so I put down my chopsticks and raised my eyebrows: "It's hard for my father and mother to 'condescend' to wash away the dust for me, I'm really 'moved', now that the meal is finished, I should gone."
Father put down his chopsticks: "As soon as you get back, you run around, do you still have this home in your heart?"
"The room is so dusty, my father wants me to live in the utility room?"
"What's your attitude? You've been out for five years? This is your house, where are you going?" My father was refuted by me and had nothing to say. He was completely annoyed by me. "Lan Wan, look at the son you taught!"
Mother ate the last bite of steak slowly, took a tissue and wiped her mouth, then moved the stool back with a sneer: "Lin Wangshu, I'm only responsible for giving birth, not teaching the son, the father's fault." Then she slowly went upstairs with her poodle in her arms.
If I stay here any longer, I might have a little food.
"I have my own house. Now I live in Tongcheng. If my father really wants to see me, I can come back at any time. As for living here, I don't need to disturb you and my mother." I walked straight out the door, I only remembered something a second before stepping out, and turned around and smiled at my father, "By the way, father, I'm already twenty-three years old, not three years old, so it's not up to you."
I stepped out without turning my head. As for the sound of cups and bowls coming from behind the door, it really has nothing to do with me.
I took out my pocket and remembered that I went out without my car keys, so I took out my mobile phone and dialed a number.
"Li Xingchen, come pick me up." LC