Seeing Jiang Yuqian again, Zhou Hao had just returned from his hometown, and it was already late August. It was in the community, the man and Cheng Zixu were coming out of the second building, and he happened to pass by the second building. The three of them bumped into each other without a sound.
After catching the train for three days and three nights, he was very tired, so tired that his whole body was limp, and he didn't have the slightest state of defense against the enemy. He just wanted to lie down and sleep, but there was a lot of work to do, so he couldn't be idle.
As for what kind of eyes Jiang Yuqian had at that time, he was not in the mood to see.
His eyes were fixed on Cheng Zixu's legs, he could run, walk, stand and bend, nothing happened.
It happened that nothing happened, and he felt that the world was absurd. If the man was limping, or had a broken leg, he would feel more or less at ease.
It's not that Zhou Hao deliberately cursed others, it's just that in his bones, he always tried to find a reasonable explanation for the wounds on his body. The so-called "trauma" means existence. If existence is reasonable, then this hurdle has been crossed.
For this leg, the fig leaf of his dignity was torn off mercilessly, exposed in full view, and watched by strangers in this city. They must have laughed at him behind his back.
But now, Cheng Zixu was jumping around like a rabbit.
Jiang Yuqian understood his gaze, and there was vague panic and guilt in his eyes.
Passing by them, Zhou Hao went to the former apartment. He had to get his stuff out.
Opening the door of the apartment, Zhou Hao changed into slippers habitually. He glanced around, thinking in his mind: take away the clothes, the books, forget about the toothbrush towel, what else? It seems to be gone.
After living there for four years, he doesn't have many things.
Zhou Hao flattened the clothes in the closet one by one on the bed, and then neatly folded them into the trolley case one by one. He heard the movement at the entrance and the sound of footsteps getting closer.
"What are you doing?" Jiang Yuqian stood at the door of the bedroom.
Zhou Hao turned around, took out the key from his trouser pocket, and handed it over, "I'll return the key to you."
Jiang Yuqian was stunned, but didn't reach out to pick it up. Zhou Hao pulled his left hand over and put the key on it.
The hands of the two touched slightly, and then separated immediately. Jiang Yuqian felt lost. That hand was no longer the hand it used to be, the hand that could turn his whole body on fire. Now, it is just a living object.
"Yuqian." Cheng Zixu walked over.
The two people in the bedroom turned their heads at the same time, and saw a slightly apologetic man, "I came in after checking that the door was open."
Zhou Hao turned his head and continued to tidy up, regardless of the people behind him. The world is quiet now, and he just wants to finish his work quickly and have a good sleep.
When the things were almost packed, Zhou Hao took out a pack of condoms from the bedside table and threw it to Cheng Zixu, "Your man used to use the leftovers."
Cheng Zixu's face turned red and then turned pale, while Zhou Hao looked at the boy in front of him expressionlessly. He didn't feel the pleasure of revenge in his heart, on the contrary, he felt very boring, and everything in front of him made him feel depressed.
Zhou Hao dragged his suitcase and left the apartment where he had lived for more than four years.
"All my conceit comes from my low self-esteem, all my heroism comes from my inner weakness, all my plausibility comes from my heart full of doubts. I pretend to be ruthless, but in fact I hate my affection. I think the meaning of life lies in Wandering around is actually just a cover-up that I haven't found a place I'm willing to stop so far."
This sentence, which I don't know where it came from, resurfaced in Zhou Hao's mind over and over again at this moment, turning into a sonorous and powerful melody, lingering in his heart over and over again...
In the final analysis, he lived too much of a fake life, pretending to be silly, making himself a clown in the eyes of others. Why bother
Childhood is over, the woman is dead, he should live the rest of his life well.
"You go back first." Jiang Yuqian put down Cheng Zixu and chased after him.
In fact, Zhou Hao didn't know where he was going. He only had 300 yuan left with him, so he could only drag his suitcase and wander aimlessly in the street.
A dreary, windless night in August. Passing by a convenience store, he went in and bought a bottle of water and a dry piece of bread.
At seven o'clock at night, the imperial capital was still full of feasting lights, and there were bustling crowds everywhere, so Zhou Hao found a nearby seat and sat down. With the water, I ate the dry piece of bread.
He ate very quickly, the bread in his hand was not for enjoyment, but for survival. Bread crumbs stuck around his lips, and he didn't bother to wipe them off. He drank the water and ate the remaining bread in a hurry.
After eating, he took out a hat from the luggage and lowered the brim of the hat to cover half of his face. He lay down on the bench and fell asleep.
Jiang Yuqian drove the car and followed that man all the way, and now he found him curled up on the side of the constantly flowing road like a homeless man. He couldn't even figure out the complicated emotions surging in his heart.
"Zhou Hao." Jiang Yuqian stood in front of the seat.
The annoying flies are coming.
Zhou Hao lifted his hat reluctantly, showing a tired face, and said in a very cold tone, "What are you doing?"
Yes, why are you chasing after me? Ask him why he moved out suddenly? Or ask him, what did you want to tell yourself when you called him a month ago? Or do you want to apologize? Jiang Yuqian was at a loss for words.
"Where's the card I gave you?"
If this person didn't say anything, Zhou Hao forgot. He got up from the bench, opened the backpack at his feet, and took out a black card from a small pocket inside the bag.
"Here." He handed it to Jiang Yuqian boldly.
Jiang Yuqian stared at the person in front of him with a gloomy expression. He obviously didn't mean it that way, but he still reached out to take the card back. The fingertips of the two touched a few times, with a cool and familiar feeling.
After such a fuss, Zhou Hao really couldn't continue to sleep on the street, because he was saving face, especially in front of his enemies.
"Where is it?" He took out his mobile phone and called Yan Ming, "I'll stay at your place overnight."
Ignoring the person in front of him, he put on his schoolbag and dragged his suitcase, stopped a taxi, and prepared to go to Yan Ming's residence. But Jiang Yuqian stopped him inexplicably.
"Fuck!" Zhou Hao couldn't hold back, and swears, "What do you want?"
Jiang Yuqian pursed his lips, "Last month... what did you want from me?"
"I've been looking for a lot of people, I don't remember."
"July 16."
Zhou Hao blinked vigorously, and said indifferently, "I'm bored, I want to have a shot with you."
"Are you going or not?" The driver brother urged impatiently.
"Let's go, let's go." Zhou Hao pushed Jiang away, and just as his butt touched the cushion, Jiang Yuqian grabbed his arm.
"He's not leaving."
The driver glared at the two people outside the car, stepped on the accelerator and drove into the crowd.
"Where are you going? I'll see you off." Jiang Yuqian's hand was still tightly gripping his wrist, with no intention of letting go.
Zhou Hao was too tired to argue, "Zijin Mingjun."
Jiang Yuqian paused for a while, but it didn't fluctuate much.
It was a rich man's villa area, and it was located in the imperial capital. A house cost at least tens of millions. Zhou Hao has been with him for more than four years, and he knows exactly what friends this person has and what they do.
The two got into the car and drove east. The windows were closed and the air conditioner was on.
Zhou Hao opened the window on his side, lit a cigarette, and looked out of the car window. Bright lights and street scenes flashed by like a carousel, leaving only clusters of strange lights still flashing on his retina.
Jiang Yuqian glanced at the silent man beside him, with a stern profile, his eyes sunk in the shadows under the hat, his chin, and his lips were covered with bluish stubble.
This person loves cleanliness the most, has a little cleanliness habit, and can't tolerate being untidy. Even if he went downstairs to buy some groceries, he would have to tidy up in the bathroom for a while. Now, it has completely disregarded the image.
There was an awkward air flow between the two of them, and there was nothing to say for a moment. Jiang Yuqian turned on the radio, and it happened to be an emotional column. The hostess held an intellectual and sweet voice, and talked about the hidden philosophical thoughts in marriage and love in detail—
"... Just as Manzhen said to Shijun at the end, 'We can't go back', fate has been separated for more than ten years, it still exists, but the relationship between each other has faded away with time, with each other's identities, with the secular world Go, maybe this is in line with Zhang Ailing's original intention of creation - "Half Life Fate". Fate only exists for half a life, and you and I will never meet in the second half of life...
Forget in the rivers and lakes with the one you love the most, and spend time with the one you love the second time... "
The voice stopped abruptly, Jiang Yuqian turned off the nonsensical and hypocritical audio, and glanced at the person on the right, seeing that he was still in a daze.
The car turned from Chunjiang Road, then went straight for about five minutes, and arrived at the destination.
Zhou Hao pushed the door and got out of the car, went to the trunk to pick up the luggage, and the wheels slid on the ground.
Jiang Yuqian looked at the people who left, feeling inexplicably irritable, feeling as if he was trying to hold the water in his palm, it could always flow clean little by little from between his fingers in all directions.
"Zhou Hao." He called into the distance.
Zhou Hao turned around and looked at him inexplicably.
Jiang Yuqian didn't speak, and suddenly stepped on the accelerator and drove away.
In fact, he still owes Zhou Hao an apology. But he dared not say it. because he was afraid of—
If "I'm sorry" is useless, then the two of them will really be enemies.