"If you like someone, you don't need to make it public. I didn't mean to force you."
The smile on Zhang Siyun’s face faded a little, "But it seems that your parents are more concerned about your relationship and marriage. If you don’t tell them, they still think that they can introduce you to the right girl in the future, and the problems between you and her. There will only be more and more in the future. Over time, she might really leave you. Do you know how uncomfortable a girl is when her heart is tired? Please, this shouldn't be the result you want, right?"
Seeing Song Yu's frown, Zhang Siyun held his cheek, "Really, these are all words from the bottom of the heart."
Hearing Zhang Siyun's repeated encouragement, Song Yu looked at her with some doubts, "What are you going to do?"
"Me?" Zhang Siyun blinked, "Planning?"
"You didn't mean to put your plan on hold for the time being." Song Yu explained lightly, "I have liked this man for many years, and I only recognize him in this life."
"I know, don't worry, you don't have any plans." Zhang Siyun took a sip of coffee and put down the cup. "What I said for the time being is to set aside a step for myself. Finally fell in love at first sight. As a result, you have a girlfriend, which made me vain. I used to have a heart. It’s really sad. But I’m a person, I’m sad but face, I don’t want to cry and cry a cup of coffee on you, it’s so ugly."
"Ah, to be friends is for each other's dignity. I can't just run away with one sentence. Don't talk about pursuing your plan. Don't take it seriously. Maybe I will be dating a new handsome guy next week. You are like you. Friends only affect my peach blossoms. We are not the same kind of people. You are a lover, and I, to enjoy life to the fullest."
She stood up, settled the account, and finally said to Song Yu, "Hey, really, what if your parents accept it if you work hard? You can be loved by someone you like, then there is no place in the sky."
"True love is very powerful, and I have to believe in fairy tales once in a while. Song Yu."
He was alone, thinking for a long time in the deserted cafe.
In the next few days, Song Yu submitted three applications for changing graduation topics, but they were all rejected. He was tired of submitting various materials every day, and ran around different offices, but still to no avail.
When he first decided on the place for the postgraduate program, Song Yu had already approached Professor He, who was his favorite research field, but the other party was too busy. Song Yu waited for him to show up outside the office for several days, and only happened to bump into him for the last time. Professor He was surprised. different.
"I know you." Professor He tweeted, "You are very famous, why do you want to come to us?"
Song Yu talked a lot with him, and finally He finally agreed and patted him on the shoulder, "Young man, we are the most tiring and hardest job here, and it is also very dangerous. It serves the people completely."
"I know."
"Okay, I think you are quite determined. Come over after graduation."
Thinking of what Professor He had said, Song Yu finally took the rejected application and knocked on the door of Professor Zhang's office.
Professor Zhang looked calm and asked Song Yu to sit and talk, but Song Yu refused.
"Song Yu, I said before. You want to change direction during your master's degree. You can talk about it after you get to the master's degree. Don't worry." Professor Zhang poured a cup of tea and pushed it in front of Song Yu. You have to change the topic? This is out of compliance. Who do you think has done this?"
Song Yu looked into his eyes and said indifferently: "Teacher Zhang, I said that I didn't want to be forced away. At first I chose your subject. You wanted me to study with you for graduate school, but I told you that I The future research direction is another. You said yes, no problem. But what you did later was not like that. People should have a sense of boundary between them. You did too much and interfered too much."
"I'm right, but Song Yu, you know that you have the best future with me. Including your father, I talked with him for a long time, and he is also very satisfied with the future plan I set for you. …"
"Ms. Zhang." Song Yu interrupted him, "My father is different from you. He may be persuaded by you for a while, but he will respect my interest. And..."
"It's impossible for me and your daughter. Please respect me and her."
"These are all things, Song Yu." Professor Zhang overlapped his hands. "You are almost finished with the first draft of your thesis now, and the results are ready. Even if I set you a precedent, can you still graduate? Don’t you want everything from before? Be realistic, boy. You still have a long way to go."
After listening to Song Yu, he laughed, "Teacher Zhang, I don't want it. You are willing to let me change, I thank you, if you don't want to, I can apply for an extension."
"After all the security research has come down, you tell me to postpone it? Song Yu, is there something wrong with you?"
"I can take the test again. I won't fail the test because of my ability. As you said, I have a long way to go." The expression on Song Yu's face is open and indifferent, "So I can't be controlled by others, I just go. The way you choose."
After speaking, he turned and left the office, tore up the rejected application, and threw it into the trash can.
When I went downstairs, I received my mother's WeChat and sent a lot.
[Ms. Lin: Xiaoyu, borrow the computer in your room from mom! I am anxious to change a menu, but my laptop ps can’t be used anymore. ]
Song Yu sent the password as he walked.
[Xiaoyu: Remember to turn it off for me. ]
In order to avoid seeing Zhang Siyun again, Song Yu moved out of the laboratory, but fortunately, on the day of the move, Professor He on the same floor saw that he let Song Yu, who was holding the box, go with him.
"You can sit here." He opened the door of the laboratory and pointed to an empty seat, "You have gone for an internship as a senior, and you won't be able to come back until you graduate." He patted Song Yu on the shoulder, "Young man, come on. Nothing can't survive."
Later, Professor He left, Song Yu put the box on the table, and the senior next door turned the swivel chair to face him, "Junior Brother, you want to come to our group."
"I hope so." Song Yu said briefly.
The phone rang again, and it was from Lin Rong.
[Ms. Lin: It’s so strange. Why can’t I find your ps save path? ]
[Ms. Lin: Oh my god, I won't do it for nothing, right? ]
Seeing all the crying faces she sent, Song Yu replied helplessly.
[Xiaoyu: I found it after searching everywhere, there are just a few folders in the computer. ]
"We all know about your quarrel with Lao Zhang. His guy is really not good. How can he use his own rights to suppress students?" The senior shook his head, "I know everything about it, it's embarrassing. "
Another senior sister smiled and said, "What's so embarrassing about how old he is. He was still in the office with a smile and said that he had known that such a popular student liked him so much, so he should have gone to take the undergraduates to complete the project. It was too busy. I missed a baby."
"Lao He is an old naughty boy, not afraid of Lao Zhang." The senior pressed the ballpoint pen in his hand, "Come on, brother."
Song Yu thought, if you really postpone the exam, it would be nice to be able to pass the exam, one year earlier and one year later.
After leaving the teaching building, Song Yu wanted to make a call to Lezhishi, but he didn't expect that the call came first, and it was from Nan Jia. He hesitated for a while, but still connected.
"What's up?"
"Yes." Nan Jia asked on the phone. "Let me make a long story short, did you and Lele have a conflict? Why did I see him in the school hospital alone? I don't know what happened, and maybe he just doesn't want to. I worried you. I just went to get the medicine and saw it at the payment office on the first floor. I wanted to accompany him, but after thinking about it, he should need you more now."
"thanks."
"You're welcome. Go ahead."
Song Yu didn't know how he drove to the school hospital, feeling a chaos in his brain. There have been too many straws on his body recently, and he can hardly count or distinguish them.
But he never thought that Lezhishi would go to the doctor secretly instead of relying on him.
There are always many people in the hospital, very chaotic. The pale lights hit many sad faces. The disinfectant rubbed all the complicated odors together roughly and poked them straight into the nasal cavity, which made people uncomfortable. Song Yu tried to maintain a calm surface, searched for a full injection room, and finally saw him at the end of the corridor.
Le Zhishi was sitting on a bench in the corridor wearing a thick black cotton coat, surrounded by Song Yu's gray plaid scarf, and wearing a black woolen hat. His entire pale face sank in, his eyes widened and staring at his hands. Cell phone placed horizontally inside.
There was an infusion stand next to him, with a little bit left in the bottle, and it seemed that the fight would be finished soon. The blue veins protruded from the back of the hanging hand, and the needle was stuck in it, but his face was expressionless when Lezhi, and he looked good, not crying or making trouble.
Song Yu was emotionally upset for a while, his eyes a little sour. He walked towards Lezhishi, and finally squatted in front of him.
Le Zhishi was stunned for a moment. His big light-colored eyes looked at Song Yu dumbly. His dark brown eyelashes moved. Finally, he released his hand holding the phone and lifted it up to touch Song Yu’s. Forehead.
Then he said: "Why are you here?"
When faced with Lezhi, Song Yu couldn't say a single word. He grabbed Le Zhishi's hand, and didn't care if it was a school hospital or if someone familiar with him would appear, then he held it and kissed the back of his hand.
"Why didn't you tell me if you were sick?" Song Yu looked at him with a soft tone, "Have you a fever?"
"Low fever, 38 degrees." Le Zhishi smiled at Song Yu, not wanting him to squat, and pulled him up, "You are so busy, I can do it myself."
Song Yu stretched out his hand to embrace Le Zhishi in the aisle where people came and went.
"You can't come to see the doctor alone if you are sick."
Le Zhishi was originally a little unnatural about this exposure to the school hospital, but when he heard Song Yu's sure words, he wanted to laugh a little, "How can there be such a rule."
"Our house is like this." Song Yu touched his face and added, "Our future home."
Le Zhishi wanted to say when we will have a home, but he felt that this sentence was too sad, so he looked up at the hanging bottle.
"It looks like it's over." He patted Song Yu, and he reached out and prepared to pull out the needle by himself, but Song Yu stopped him, "You can't pull it out by yourself, are you stupid? There is no hemostatic swab." But he quickly slowed down. "Hey, I'll call a nurse."
Seeing Song Yu's back, Le Zhishi still felt unreal. He touched the needle and it hurt.
He thought of coming out of the study room in a drowsy manner, queuing up to pay the fee at the school hospital, and mistaken the receipt for the medicine, so he called the doctor for medicine to scold him for nothing. The injection room is full of people. He can only get injections in the corridor, which is windy and some people smoke secretly.
After two hours, I finally felt that my suffering was about to end when I was finally happy. This was a great improvement in my life. But in the end, Song Yu still appeared.
Le Zhishi wanted to know why Song Yu could find his skills anytime and anywhere, so that maybe one day, when Song Yu was the hardest, he would not be so slow.
The nurse pulled out the needle when he was in a daze, and said gently to him, "I will come tomorrow too." Lezhishi thanked him, Song Yu grabbed his hand and pressed the cotton swab for him, just like that. Go downstairs and drive him back to the apartment.
On the way, he told Lezhishi the good news that Professor He took the initiative to let him into the laboratory. Lezhishi was very happy and took the initiative to kiss him several times at the red light.
The other Song Yu didn't say anything.
Returning to the apartment, Song Yu turned on the air conditioner to increase the temperature, urged Lezhi to drink medicine and rest. He obediently took off the cotton clothes and lay in bed, suddenly thinking of something, took out a chocolate candy from the cotton clothes and put it on the bedside table.
"Take your temperature again." Song Yu took the thermometer and sat on the side of the bed, and when he handed it to Lezhi, he saw the candy at the same time.
"I'll eat it for you. I can't eat it anyway. There seems to be flour in it."
"Where did it come from?" Song Yu picked up the candy and glanced at it, then put it back. "Is it someone else again?"
Le Zhishi nodded, "There was originally a four-year-old boy on the bench where I had the infusion. He gave it to me." His expression became a little cute and his eyes were bright. He described to Song Yu, "He is a little bit Like you, your hair is very dark, your eyes are very dark, and you look good. And very awkward."
Song Yu showed a confused expression, but Le Zhishi took his arm and continued, imitating the little boy, "He said, you look so strange, why do your eyes look like this? His mother taught him When he said he was rude, he said awkwardly that he was sorry, then found a candy in his pocket and stuffed it with me, and said to me,'This candy is not tasty, I don't like it, give it to you'."
Le Zhishi laughed, "His mother told me that this is his favorite candy and never gave it to others."
After that, he looked at Song Yu, "Is it very similar to you?"
Song Yu looked unwilling to admit it.
"I wondered if you were so cute when you were four years old." The smile on Lezhishi's face gradually faded, and his eyes were a little lost. "Brother, you like children very much."
Song Yu frowned, "Why do you ask?"
Lezhishi's tone is relaxed, "Because you always tell me about pregnancy."
The light in the bedroom is very warm, shining on Lezhishi’s white face, even the small hairs are soft, and his voice is very soft, "You know, no matter how many times we go to bed, we won’t have children. ."
Some things can never be achieved, just like some candy can never be eaten when they are happy to know.
Song Yu's heart seemed to be pulled down by these words.
"That's me teasing you."
If he knew that these things would happen later, there would be the possibility of being forced to form a family marriage, Song Yu would never choose such an inferior joke that might make Lezhishi sad.
He was just so happy. When I was with Lezhishi, I was very happy and free every second. He couldn't get anything from anyone. This kind of happiness is a little strange to Song Yu, so after he gets it, he will be at a loss and cautious, before turning into an immature hairy boy in front of Lezhishi, saying some absurd things to amuse his lover.
"I don't like children at all. They are noisy, cry and make trouble, and they will take up other people's energy." Song Yu truthfully confessed: "I know we won't have it, so I dare to make a joke. To be honest, the importance of that child To me, sex is no more than an identity, such as your child’s father or your partner, because the more identities between us about love and responsibility, the harder it is for you to leave me, isn’t it?"
"But it's better not to have." Song Yu even said angrily, "I don't want anyone to separate my feelings from you. If you have a child, you will definitely put your heart on him. I don't want it. , Our family only needs you and me."
Le Zhishi was a little surprised, he didn't expect this answer.
He hesitated and asked, "Do you really don't like babies?"
"I don't like it." Song Yu leaned over, kissed Lezhishi's forehead, and stroked his cheek again.
"And I already have a baby, I just want to raise him."
Lezhishi suddenly had a sore nose and felt very sad, but he did not cry. Song Yu hugged him, coaxed him to sleep, told him not to worry, not to be sad, he was there for everything.
He said very softly that it would be okay, and it would be much better when he woke up, and they would be more relaxed and free than they are now.
The effects of the cold medicine gradually worked, and when I was happy, I fell asleep in a safe embrace.
I don’t know how long I slept, Lezhishi suddenly suffered from angina in his sleep. Opened his eyes, he called Song Yu’s name nervously, only to see the medicine on the bedside table and the toffee he could eat. A piece of paper that says [I will be back soon, I will bring you delicious food, and wait for me to go home. ]
He stared at the note and looked at the clock on the wall. It was already eleven o'clock in the evening, and he was disturbed. Somehow, he thought of Song Yu's behavior in the school and hospital regardless of other people's gaze, and thought of the words Song Yu said when he coaxed him to sleep, it seemed that he had vaguely got many clues.
Le Zhishi picked up his mobile phone and called Song Yu, but no one answered him. He calmed down and called Lin Rong.
No one answered either.
The idea was confirmed. Lezhishi ran downstairs, but couldn't find Song Yu's car, so he took a taxi and returned to Song's house.
He ran up the elevator and waited anxiously for the elevator door to open. When the door opened, he even shook his hands. For a moment, Lezhishi found that he was wearing cotton slippers and there was a fever-reducing sticker on his head. He looked unconscious and embarrassed.
After calming down for two seconds, he opened the door and heard Song Yu's father's voice. He came to Song Yu's house when he was three years old. It was almost the first time that he heard Song Jinfa's temper such a big temper. Although there is no hysteria, it has also lost the gentleness of the past.
"Song Yu, I think that as a father, I have never asked you anything. I have never stopped you from what you want to learn, including that you said that you wanted to change direction and study emergency surveying and mapping of natural disasters. Very reluctant, but did I say something to you? Have you ever thought that for so many years, every time I turn on the news and see people killed in disasters, I will have nightmares at night and think of your Uncle Le."
His voice was trembling, "You said you are going to do this dangerous job, because emergency surveying and mapping rescue can reduce the number of children like Lele in the world. You have said so, even if there is a shadow in my heart, Yes, I also agree."
Hearing this, Lezhi froze.
Song Yu never told him this.
"But what about you? What are you doing? Dad took the only flesh and blood of Uncle Le back, hoping that he would grow up well, instead of letting you take him on such a road and make him suffer! You do this and make me dozens How do you go to see him when you leave in the next year?"
"Song Jin, Xiaoyu took the initiative to come back and tell us that he had thought about it..."
When Le Zhishi heard Lin Rong's voice, with an unobvious cry, his heart suddenly hurt.
"Consider? He is admitting that he likes men. If you accidentally read the letter, would he tell you directly that the person he associates with is Lezhishi?"
Lin Rong suppressed her crying, "Then what do you want the child to say? Of course he doesn't want it to be like this. Do you really think Xiaoyu is someone who deliberately induced Lele? Isn't the letter already obvious? Xiaoyu, he …He never thought about what to do."
Song Jin was silent for a few seconds.
These few seconds are like years to Lezhishi.
"Song Yu, you said you like men, so there are so many men in the world, why do you choose Lele? He grew up with you and he is like a brother, don't you think it is strange?"
Song Yu's voice finally appeared, "Seriously, I don't like men either. When I only like Lezhi, there are many people in the world, and I am really strange and abnormal, so I just like to grow up with myself. Brother. Dad, don't you think I am in pain?"
After a long time, Song Jin spoke again, and the mood in his voice seemed to change again.
"Of course you can say that you like Lele right now, you have to do it, you can do it later? Now young people break up at every turn. One day you change your mind and separate and want to be with others, Song Yu, what do you do when you let Lezhi Can he continue to live in our house? How do you let outsiders look at him and talk about him?"
"He has not had a home since he was three years old. When that day is true, you can't retreat to brotherhood. Do you want him to try homelessness again? Xiaoyu, you can't look back. The way!"
"I know." Song Yu resolutely said: "I never thought of turning around."
Lezhishi took steps from the hallway to the living room, just a few meters, every step was very difficult.
He finally peeled off the protective shell of darkness, revealing his true self in the light.
Lin Rong's voice seemed to be in her ears, "Xiaoyu, you never thought of turning your head back, what about the other way around?"
If one day, Lezhishi is with others.
"The other way around..." Song Yu smiled dismal, "You can turn around at any time when Lezhi, I am willing to let him go. But as long as he doesn't want to leave me, I will never let go."
"I don't want to leave him."
Le Zhishi walked out of the hallway, and the dazzling light in the living room hit him.
The parents in the quarrel looked at him, but Lezhishi's eyes fell on the printed paper on the ground. He bent down and picked it up.
[To someone who will appear in the future:
I don't want to say hello, and I don't even want you to show up. But I know that there will be such a day, so that you can better take care of Lezhi, so that you will not be in danger at the beginning of the relationship, I will take precautions and write down this "Handbook for Communicating with Lezhishi", please read it carefully.
First of all, Lezhishi suffers from a serious wheat allergy. Obviously, all things related to wheat have nothing to do with him. I hope you don't allow him to eat cakes just because of his request (he is very good at acting spoiled), even a little bit may kill him. His allergies are very dangerous, ranging from rash and diarrhea to severe asthma.
This is the second point I want to remind you. You must carry his medicine with you. It is best to master the method of first aid for asthma. It is not difficult. If you need it, I can send you the video tutorial I learned before. It is very useful. , Please be by his side when he needs it.
His parents passed away very early, and I hope you don’t mention it too frequently. Although he doesn’t say it, he cares about it in his heart (Don’t show him too many family-related movies. He will have a headache if he cries too much.)
Also, he is very afraid of thunder. When you see this, please don't laugh, don't look down on being afraid of thunder, because he is really scared, and you have to respect his fear. In fact, the way to overcome is very simple, you just need to cover his ears and sleep with him at night, even if you don't hug him (Of course, you can hug him and kiss him, you are not me).
Lezhishi loves sweets and small animals. He likes to eat soup (you need to eat the skin) and rice noodles for breakfast. He is addicted to reading comics. Please don't question his preferences. And he is very good at drawing and making handicrafts. Please be sure to cherish his works and don't leave them littered. He will feel sad when he sees them. If he gives you a small sticker that you can do anything, I sincerely hope that you will not abuse it.
Although the above description may make you retreat, you are lucky, because Lezhishi is the kindest and gentlest child in the world. He will not ask you to do too much, has no temper, and it is even difficult to refuse others. Hope you You can teach him how to refuse, and I hope you can tolerate his dietary taboos, and forgive him for his temperament when he is sick (he is actually very cute when he is making trouble).
I have written a lot of deletions, deletions, and reductions. If I think of new ones, I will join them. You might think that the more I am acting on my behalf, I have no stand. But if I could receive such a letter before meeting him at the age of six, I would be very lucky.
Please be nice to him, don't let Lezhi cry, he likes crying very much. If you feel annoying, please send him back, or notify me as soon as possible to pick him up. Please don't leave him alone.
Le Zhishi’s brother, Song Yu]
What he couldn't see was that the original file name was [5201010 (fourth draft of the manual)], which was preserved five years ago.