I don't know when it started, I had a different thought about Yu'er.
I still remember when I picked her up just now, she was thin and small, with a dirty little face, no bigger than a palm, but her eyes were so bright that they could even be called fierce, but I clearly saw the disguised face. Behind the ferocity is vulnerability.
Suddenly, I felt a little distressed, so I brought her by my side in a strange way, and ten years passed in the blink of an eye.
I know she is extremely dependent on me, and I also enjoy this dependence. At the beginning, she was still wary of me, and she had to sniff carefully when eating, and only dared to let go of her appetite to eat if she felt that there was no poison or drug. She was obviously very hungry. She ate a few big bowls of rice. As she ate and ate, she suddenly shed tears and fell down. I knew that she must have had many grievances after wandering for many years. She didn't speak, just quietly accompanied her .
Later, she gradually let go of her mind and accepted me, and she was not even willing to leave me for a moment. At night, she hugged the quilt and knocked on my door, tucked her chin, looked at me carefully with her clear eyes from bottom to top, and begged: "Master, can I sleep with you?" She said pitifully. Said, the right thumb and index finger compared a small distance, said: "I will not occupy a lot of space, the corner of the bed is fine, or I can sleep on the floor..."
I sighed in my heart, knowing that she was afraid that I would leave her at night. They are two people who have never met before, but she relies on me so much, but I love her so much. She curled up into a small shrimp, sleeping on the corner of the bed, I couldn't bear to watch her, so I pulled her in and whispered, "Yu'er, I won't leave you behind."
Her back stiffened, and after a long time, she said in a muffled voice: "The adoptive father also said so." Then I heard a low choked sob.
I took her into my arms and patted her on the back until her breathing calmed down and she fell asleep. There are still tears on her face. In the first year, she would often wake up in a dream. After waking up, she would look for me everywhere and cry loudly when she couldn't find me. After that experience, I will never Let her sleep alone. After the second year, she basically never cried again. I don't want to see her cry. It feels like someone's heart is being held tightly and the pain is unbearable.
I have never realized that Yu'er and I are different. Except for my teacher, I rarely get along with other women, and I have always dressed Yu'er as a boy. She doesn't seem to realize that there is something wrong with her. She is at an age that is indisputable. With a smile, he also looks like a handsome young man.
When I arrived in the capital, I met senior brother Mo Wei. When the senior brother saw Yu'er, his eyes lit up, and he pulled her cheek left and right, and the little flesh that he had managed to raise was turned red by him. I felt distressed when I saw it, so I pushed it away. His hand protects Yu'er behind her back. Senior brother smiled maliciously and looked at me, such a first meeting made Yu'er hate senior brother for many years.
I always say that our Yu'er is a gentle kitten, and the senior brother sneered when he heard this, and said, Shen Dongli, I'm afraid you have raised a white-eyed wolf. He said, Yu'er is a fierce wolf cub outside, and she put away her fangs and claws only in front of you, Shen Dongli, and disguised herself as a kitten. Then he showed the wound that was caught by the wolf cub as evidence.
I don't pay any attention to these words, as long as Yu'er is my kitten. She often climbed onto my lap when I was dealing with official duties, found a suitable and comfortable seat, lay down on my stomach, and then slowly fell asleep. Sometimes when I'm not around, she has to hug my clothes and smell my breath to fall asleep. After Yu'er left me, I would think every night, would she sleep well without me by my side
The first time I realized the difference between us was when she had menstruation, I ran to the hospital with her in my arms, my heart was beating so fast that I was afraid that something might happen to her. The result is... From then on, Yu'er could no longer sleep with me, no matter how much she wailed at the door, I was determined not to open the door. After she went back to sleep in frustration, I quietly went to see her again and helped her tuck the quilt.
She said at first that she sleeps very well, that she doesn't kick the quilt, doesn't grind her teeth, doesn't punch in her sleep and doesn't talk in her sleep, none of which is true. I just endured it at first, but then I got used to it. I couldn't sleep at night without her grabbing the territory from me. wry smile.
After that, Yu'er's figure gradually became taller, and her appearance became more and more exquisite, with the fragrance of a girl on her body, but her demeanor was free and easy, which is beyond the reach of ordinary men and women. She kept her cat habit and still wanted to find a good dream in my lap, but she was grown up then, not as thin and small as she was when she was a child, and as soon as she got into my arms, I took her out , She climbed up again with perseverance.
I said to her, "Yu'er, there are differences between men and women, and we can't do this in the future."
She pouted, with a face of reluctance, she simply covered her ears and said, "Yu'er didn't hear anything." By the way, she also closed her eyes.
I smiled helplessly, she suddenly jumped up, her movements were so dexterous, I couldn't avoid it, she threw me back on the back of the chair, she sat on my lap, her legs spread around my waist, He buried his face in my chest and said in a muffled voice, "Master, don't you want Yu'er..."
I laughed and pulled her back, but she hugged me like a koala, twisting and turning to break away from my hand.
I said hoarsely, "Yu'er, don't make trouble!"
She raised her face and said aggrievedly: "Master... it will be fine in a while..."
I gritted my teeth and threw her out. She groaned, gave me a hurt look, and ran away. I was ashamed of my reactions and terrified of my emotions.
How could he feel that way about her? She is still a child, she sees me as the only one to rely on, trust me, rely on me...
I sat in the study all day, unable to do anything, and Yu'er didn't come back until dark. I thought of the look in her eyes when she left, and I was suddenly afraid, would she run away from home, would she never come back
If she leaves me forever... My hands and feet were cold, and I ran out before I could put on my coat, only to bump into her walking in with a full belch at the door...
"Master, are you going out?" She hiccupped again, looked up at me with doubts in her eyes, "Where are you going?"
At that moment, I felt like a fool...
With a downcast face, I walked back and said, "I didn't go anywhere."
She followed me step by step and said: "Master, the new cooks from Tianxianglou are very skilled, let's go eat tomorrow. By the way, I just ate a table, and I told them that I will come to the mansion to withdraw money tomorrow. "
At that time, she had already made a name for herself in the Imperial College and even the entire imperial capital, and she didn't need to bring money with her when she went out, she would know that she would come to the mansion to collect money after reporting to the famous family. She eats when she's upset, I should have known...
She suddenly snorted and said with a smile: "Master, did you want to go out and find me just now?"
I kept silent.
She walked around to me and said, "Master, are you worried that I will run away from home?"
I looked down at her and didn't speak.
She had a good laugh. "Master, don't worry, even if you throw Yu'er out, Yu'er will crawl back by herself, and she will never leave Master." As she spoke, she rushed forward again.
She must have forgotten that she had said this, that's why she left so cleanly later, without leaving a word.
I began to distance myself from Yu'er, not daring to let her discover my dirty thoughts. At that time, she was already in her prime, and I was in my twenties, still unmarried. There were countless matchmakers, from noble daughters to royal relatives. National relatives, I always decline with a smile, only saying that I have no intention of this matter. Those people didn't give up, they waited at the door of my house, and even entered the room. Yu'er was so angry that she kicked out one by one like a cat whose tail was stepped on—really kicked...
I knew she was practicing martial arts, but I didn't expect her to be so strong. No wonder all the students in the Imperial College suffered so much. They all said that a life without being beaten by Li Yingyu is incomplete...
For Yu'er's violent behavior, I was subtly delighted, and sometimes I deliberately reprimanded her with a straight face, she kicked her heels aggrievedly, lowered her head and turned her face away, and made trouble with me, then I couldn't help but want to hug her hold her...
Yu'er said: "Master, if you really want to find me a teacher's wife, just say it straight, bad people will go to hell in eighteen levels of marriage, and Yu'er doesn't want to do that either." She clearly didn't think so in her heart, her expression Unwilling or unwilling, it seems that as long as I reveal that I intend to marry a wife, she will pounce on me and bite me.
I told myself, Yu'er is still young, wait a few more years...
But then I thought, I am her master, this is unethical...
The way of Confucius and Mencius, the love between men and women, I feel like being burned inside, and I am suffering all the time. This suffering is even worse when I watch Yu'er grow up day by day. When I was giving lectures at the Imperial College, I noticed the prince's thoughts on Yu'er, not only him, but also others, but that person is the prince, which is very dangerous. Yu'er is special, not because of her beautiful appearance, but because of her unique qualities that attract people around her.
I saw Yu'er joking with others, and I suddenly learned what jealousy is. At home, I pretended to be casual and asked: "Yu'er, do you like the prince?"
She was stunned for a moment, then sneered and said, "The only way to like that masochist is when his brain is trapped by the door. Master, you don't know, that person is mentally ill. He came here every day and asked me to beat him. His skin must be itchy!"
My heart tightened and relaxed, but fortunately, Yu'er didn't like him, but the crown prince seemed to be determined to win Yu'er. I secretly said to Zhou Taifu, find a name and let Yu'er leave the Imperial College.
He directly lamented that it was a pity, saying that Yu'er was one in a million talents, but it was a pity that he was ignorant and incompetent. Yu'er also told me about that incident: "Isn't it just writing "University" silently? What's so difficult about it? Comprehension is the sum of memory and comprehension. I don’t understand it at all, it’s useless.”
I held back a smile and said in a deep voice, "Yu'er, don't swear."
She stuck out her tongue and gave me a mischievous smile.
She is sixteen years old, the flowers are blooming just right, her soft waist, her gestures and gestures inadvertently reveal her charm, all of which attract me to approach, just thinking about it makes me tremble all over, and I can't control myself. Then I was shocked to find that I have been with her for ten years.
The crown prince wants Yu'er, and even the emperor treats her differently. I feel bitter in my heart, and I don't know who to tell.
Mo Wei probably saw some clues. Standing in the garden that afternoon, he broke off a peach branch and said to me: "If there are flowers, you can break them straight away. Don't wait until there are no flowers to break the branches."
I took the peach branch with a wry smile. That delicate flower bloomed just right, but soon it would wither because it left the mother tree. Can I fold it
On that night, Yu'er set up a banquet and said that she would celebrate ten years of acquaintance with me. I secretly became vigilant in my heart, after all, this move was really deliberate and suspicious. Yu'er ate the food fiercely, then toasted me and said, "Master, let's have a drink, Yu'er is happy."
I looked at the wine glass, and Yu'er said again: "Master, what are you suspicious of, it's not poisonous!" She took my glass and drank it down, poured another glass for me, raised it to my lips and said: "Master, drink it."
Where her lips touched... I tightened my throat and drank the glass of wine as if nothing had happened.
Yu'er stared at me with a pair of eyes, her cheeks began to turn red, perhaps because of the smell of alcohol, her clear eyes were stained with the smell of alcohol, misty and glistening, her pink lips parted slightly, and she shouted: "Master..." Then he sat in my arms.
Her body was a little hot, her hands were wrapped around my neck, her lips rubbed against my neck, and the breath she exhaled was sweet and warm.
As soon as my lower abdomen tightened, I immediately understood.
The drink was an aphrodisiac, and she drank it herself.
Afterwards, I thought, she was probably too scared, and the dose was not too much. It was hard to say whether it was because of the nature of the medicine or the emotion, but I can say with certainty that with my self-control, that little medicine was not enough to make me feel sick. It was completely out of control, maybe it was because I endured it for too long, maybe it was because of her initiative, maybe it was because of my selfishness, I finally found an excuse and ate the little disciple I had been thinking about for many years.
She is like a flower on a branch in February, pink and delicate, the petals are slowly blown open by the spring breeze, and the body stretches out, waiting for someone to pick it. I kissed every petal and made a lot of preparations, but she still gasped in pain, looking at me drunkenly, her eyes full of attachment and tenderness.
But even so, she ran away. Maybe... maybe it was a guilty conscience, maybe it was other reasons, in short, she ran away without a trace. I looked at the mess in the room, the plum blossoms drawn on the snow-white bed sheet, and I could only smile wryly.
Is the broken peach branch only a one-night splendor after all
The warmth and softness of that night, the fragrance that intoxicated the body and mind, has never been available since then.
After she left, I missed her every day, but she never heard from her.
When Mo Wei found out about this, he sneered, "It really is a white-eyed wolf, who will avenge her kindness and run away after eating it." Then he said, "Dong Li, I'll help you catch her back, and it's up to you to dispose of her when the time comes. How To."
I laughed, how could I give up
After waiting like this for many years, one day, she finally came back, weathered the wind and frost, and became more beautiful, with firmer and sharper eyes. Mo Wei said, the little wolf cub has grown into a big wolf. She pawed over and slapped him. Fly, then turned around and looked at me carefully.
My Yu'er is back...
I endured the bitterness in my heart, and showed a smile with difficulty. Her eyes suddenly turned red, and she asked me in a hoarse voice: "Master, do you still blame me..."
She seems to have misunderstood it. I blame her, not because she took drugs, but because she has been gone for several years without hearing from her. Even that subtle resentment disappeared the moment he saw her.
I sighed, took her into my arms, and stroked her back lightly like in the past.
"Yu'er, be good, don't cry." I kissed her heart and hugged her tightly. After listening to my words, she calmed her breathing slowly and fell into my arms.
"Master, Yu'er loves you." After calming down, she said. "Many years."
I smiled and said, "I know."
Fear is born of love, and the authorities are obsessed with each other. At that time, we were not sure about each other's intentions. We were tempted, doubted, loved and hurt, and we are only coming back now. Will it be too late
She was in my arms, raised her face and asked me: "Master, you...have you ever liked Yu'er..."
What a silly boy...
I smiled and said: "Shen Dongli met you when he was seventeen years old, and in the next ten years, no one but you was by my side. Yu'er, I liked someone before, who else do you think besides you? "
At that moment, she burst into tears.
I kissed the teardrops on her face, reluctant to let her cry, it was like this many years ago, even if it was happy, it still made me feel bad.
Later, one afternoon, I was reading a book, and she was practicing calligraphy. After she finished writing, she brought it over for me to read.
Words, it can't be worse, but you can't ask too much of her. Laughing and shaking his head, it's nothing more than a bad word, but he even made a mistake.
"One day as a teacher," I pointed and said, "is a lifetime as a father."
She looked at me with a smile, jumped up and put her arms around my neck, rubbed the tip of her nose against my neck, and said with a smirk, "It's a lifelong husband."
So he looked down at her and smiled helplessly.
Well, you are always right, my little boy, my little lady.