The answer was completely unexpected to me.
"Ningning has no parents anymore, she can't lose me or grandpa anymore."
"You still have the nerve to say that you and Grandpa An cannot be lost. You are away all year round and never come back. What is the difference between this and not having you as a brother?"
An Xuan didn't get angry because of my words of reproach, and there was a bit of melancholy on his face.
As if I had hit the mark.
"Am I right? Right?"
An Xuan looked at me suddenly, and said flatly, without any fluctuations in his words: "If I remain strong, the temporary separation will become a permanent separation."
This sentence made me feel a lightning strike in my heart.
I understand what he means, totally.
He went out to practice, and it was only a short separation. As long as he is strong enough, he will be able to learn and come back. But... Once he doesn't have such a strong strength, he may walk on the same path as his parents in the future.
He died because he encountered a powerful demon that was invincible.
I was at a loss as to how to respond to what he said. I really never thought that there was such a possibility.
"Besides, I know that Ningning doesn't want to learn how to exorcise ghosts, so I have to take her part and work harder." His tone was very calm, but his words shocked me endlessly.
It is also because of his words that I feel that An Ning needs to listen to his words and forgive him.
An Xuan has made so many sacrifices to protect her and for her own sister, and now she can't even get An Ning's understanding, bearing so much pressure and burden alone.
I walked by the cabinet, chose a wreath, and then I was going to find paper in the store, write down the memorial words, and paste it.
"I've changed my mind about you."
While I was writing, I glanced at An Xuan and said, "I always thought that you were an irresponsible person, but after hearing what you said just now, I believe you."
"At the same time, I also understood some things."
I carefully wrote a column of words vertically on the paper, and then pasted the note on the wreath.
"What."
An Xuan was leaning against the half-opened rolling door, smoking a cigarette with his back to me.
I took out the money in my pocket, put it on the counter that kept collecting money, pressed it down with a water glass, and walked towards him.
"A lot of people do a lot of things that seem to disappoint others, but they are not." I paused and continued, "They all have their own purposes. As a bystander, I shouldn't be wronged if I don't know your real situation. You are biased."
An Xuan took a puff of cigarette, didn't look at me, but what he said surprised me: "I have changed my opinion of you too."
"I always thought you had bad intentions. Even though I knew that you were the Queen of Hades, our task as ghost exorcists is actually no different from that of the underworld, and there is no hostile relationship. However, humans and ghosts have different paths after all. Even if you live People, but since you are the Queen of Hades, you are equivalent to half a ghost."
"And the breath of the underworld you carry will affect the living."
I listened quietly to him.
"However, all your actions let me know that you are not a bad person."
This sentence made me laugh directly, and I said angrily and amusedly: "I am not in the first place."
"The relationship between An Ning and me can be described as a relative. I don't know why you are so hostile to me when you see me."
"Maybe it's because the sister-in-law is eager."
I raised my eyebrows and said, I glanced at him narrowly by the way, and saw his fingers holding the cigarette tremble, and I felt uncomfortable.
There was a smile in my eyes, and I walked out with a wreath, seemingly casually: "I'm fine, let's go."
An Xuan casually dusted off the cigarette and threw it on the ground, I could still see its burning flame.
He easily closed the shutter door, and we were about to go to the Loving Orphanage. Before we left, I decided to say what I wanted to say.
"If you still come to the shroud shop in the future, remember not to smoke."
I looked at him seriously: "Grandpa An will break his leg."
I didn't talk nonsense. At the beginning, I did see customers who came to order smoking in the store. In the end, the old man was very upset. Not only did he not agree to the order, but he also kicked them out.
There are many mourning clothes made of cloth in the store, as well as various ingots made of tinfoil.
It's all flammable stuff, and of course he wouldn't agree with someone smoking cigarettes here.
An Xuan nodded almost invisible, and a smile flashed in my eyes.
…
We originally wanted to hail a taxi, but An Xuan said that a five-minute walk would be enough, so we gave up the idea.
Cross two streets, and the abandoned orphanage in front of you appears in front of you.
For some reason, when I saw it, my eyes turned to that bleak swing unconsciously, and my steps stopped.
At this moment, I am standing where I was when I recalled the memory, and the first thing that comes to my mind is Xiaoru sitting on it, swinging on the swing with her back to me.
There was no one around, and she was the only one in the empty and silent orphanage.
Sitting on her favorite swing, staring at the only place she has ever been in her life, she doesn't know what to think.
My eyes were blurred, just at the moment when my eyes fixed on the swing.
A feeling called heartache fills my heart, pity, regret, and sadness.
An Xuan seemed to have noticed my strangeness, his face was a little complicated, and he seemed to want to comfort me, but he hesitated for a while, and still didn't make any moves.
Naturally, I would not pretend that he would come to appease me. I looked around the orphanage. The gate was locked with a thick black iron chain and a seal was pasted.
It seems that I can't get in.
I looked left and right again, and my hands were still tugging on the iron chain, but I couldn't pull it off. The sadness in my heart spread quickly like a dike was broken.
Obviously, obviously I am so close to this orphanage, only a few steps away from the place where Xiaoru died.
But I can't get close, can't get close.
I just want to put the wreath in my hand on the place where she died, and pay homage to her. An Xuan watched me cry silently, kept pulling the chain with his hands, frowned, and slowly raised his hands, as if to comfort me.
At this moment, a voice came from the side: "You are..."
I raised my head with tears in my eyes, and saw the old woman standing next to me, my pupils shrank!
This familiar face, I remember, I remember very clearly!
She is Aunt Mao, the cooking aunt of the orphanage, and the only one who gave Xiaoru warmth and love in the orphanage!
Why is she here? How is it such a coincidence
"Aunt Mao."
I yelled unconsciously, Aunt Mao's body froze obviously, and then she glanced at me several times in doubt, making sure that she had never seen me before, she frowned and asked, "Who are you, why do you know my name."
I didn't know how to respond to her words for a while, but An Xuan spoke first.
"We're here to pay homage to Xiaoru."
"Xiao Ru?" She didn't relax because of An Xuan's words. Instead, she showed vigilance and shouted sharply, "Xiao Ru is an orphan, how could you know her?"
"Tell me! Are you the one sent by the pervert! Let me tell you, I will try my best not to let you get close to the place where Xiaoru died!"
Aunt Mao's mental state is very bad, as if Xiaoru's death left a lot of wounds and shadows in her heart, causing her to become very emotional when she heard about Xiaoru, regardless of the facts .
I quickly explained: "No, no, Aunt Mao, listen to me..."
"What are you listening to? It doesn't sound good, let's go!"
I was determined, and simply took out the wreath in my arms, including the doll fragments tightly wrapped in cloth, and said to her: "Look, I have brought everything, I am indeed here Those who pay homage to Xiaoru are not here to find fault!"
"I also know how Xiaoru died. She didn't starve to death because of malnutrition, but was beaten to death by the director of the orphanage. Are you right?"
"You...how do you know who you are!"
Aunt Mao shook her finger in disbelief, pointed at me, and couldn't even speak fluently.
After all, publicizing the truth about Xiaoru's death was not abuse, and few people knew the truth.
I gave the package containing the doll fragments and rags to Aunt Mao, and said sadly: "Open it and have a look, be careful, the things inside will easily fall to the ground."
The moment Aunt Mao lifted the cloth with trembling hands, her hand trembled suddenly, and the thing almost fell to the ground.
Familiar floral fabrics, and dolls that have been broken into pieces, even though the original shape cannot be seen, Aunt Mao recognized what it was at a glance.
Her mouth opened and closed for a while, and finally she turned her head to look at me in disbelief, unable to utter a word.
"Do you believe what I say now?"
I looked at the swing that was blown by the wind, and said lightly, "Xiao Ru likes that swing the most, doesn't she?"
"You... who are you..."
Aunt Mao looked at me as if she had seen a ghost, because she had never seen me come here since she worked in the orphanage, and the few points I said now, only those who have been in contact with Xiaoru for a long time know.
And this thing wrapped in cloth... She immediately thought of some horrible and fantasy things. Although it was unbelievable, it was not so different from the reality.
I just smiled wryly. I originally wanted to give this old lady a good impression, but now it seems that I can't do it.
"A bystander who knows Xiaoru's tragic past."
In the end, Aunt Mao opened the door for us. I heard that Aunt Mao lived near the orphanage a long time ago. It is said that her children have all gone abroad. Her husband seems to have passed away in an accident when she was young. She Feeling flustered by being alone, she came to this orphanage to be a cooking aunt.
After all, there are many lovely children here. She comes here every day, cooks for these children without mothers and fathers, and lives with them, which can give her a little comfort.
Although the orphanage was closed, she still had a spare key to the gate.
She opened the door and we walked in, and I went straight to the spot in front of the swing.
The ground has been covered with a thick layer of soil, but these things can't cover up the dark pool of blood on the ground.